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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1431 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 07, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
V Question by V on Aug 05, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Thanks Madam, for ur prompt advice. I would like to further ask a question on my subject. I understood that the female with whom I am having an affair has been hiding some of her banking transactions with me I asked her about the same but she said that there is nothing as such. . So i took her bank statement of last six months and came to know that she was playing some online games and had almost lost around 10k, So I asked her on this issue. She has got wild on me as to how could I take the bank statement without her knowledge and has stopped talking to me and has blocked my number. I dont think it was a mistake on my part of checking her account as I had a doubt and that proved true. Even then I pleaded to her and accepted that it was my mistake for tracking her account without informing her and also assured that it wont be repeated. But still she is very adamant and not ready to talk to me. So madam how do i convince her and get her back.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Surely you have the right to know where your money is being spent.
In fact, you could have told her upfront that you want to know what is happening with the money that you give her. Is it being used for household expenses? But it seems the lady has caught fancy with some online games.
Obviously, you don't trust her and that is the reason that you went behind her back to check on the money. And then you go ahead and apologize.
You have only given her a message that whatever she does with you or your money is fine. Do you need any more proof? Focus on your life better rather than jumping into relationships. Convince to get a lady back who has been hiding things from you? Do you not see how this is slowly turning against you? Hopefully, someday you will realize...
Stop and think and make the right decision...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1431 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 22, 2022

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Hello Anu,Pls help. I am in a lot of mental trauma right now. I wrote to you earlier but my article was not published. I am a 36 years male married for the last 7 years with 2 kids. Last year when I was alone and my family was at my native place, I got close to one of my female school friends who is single. We came close and talked a lot. Gradually I fell in love and gifted her close to Rs 2 lakhs rupees to fulfil her shopping and household expenses. On realising that I am being trapped with no future in sight, I asked to return my money. This infuriated the girl and she abused me citing that I am making fun of her poverty and all. I understood the situation and told her to just return Rs 25k and stop. Thereafter we started talking again but obviously the intensity reduced. Over the last 8 months, my family is back and I cannot get over her. I constantly try to ping or call her but 90% of the time she doesn’t respond. I recently sent her Rs 15k for her birthday which she accepted after initial refusal. Now when I messaged her to know how her day was, she really got angry and blocked me on all social media platforms. I reached out to her sister to assuage her and apologize. She called and really abused me citing the constant family surveillance she is under. I promised I won’t text or call her for the next 2 months. Now I don’t know what to do. Should I ask her or her sister for the money to be returned if this escalates? Because she warned me that she would report to the police if I don’t stop messaging. She fears that family members know about me. She doesn’t have parents but is under constant family surveillance. Pls suggest the next course of action. Should I cut her off completely and risk losing the 2 lakhs and gain my mental peace or try to communicate intermittently? The day she abused me I really lost my mental peace. Pls advice.
Ans:

Dear MK,

What advice can I give you when the solution is right in front of you?

She wants to get your attention and fulfil her monetary needs; that’s all, Doesn’t that tell you anything? And when you try and contact her, she says that she is under surveillance.

How much of this has affected your marriage? What exactly was the need to step out of marriage for this attention?

Sometimes, we fancy things that are prohibited and this happens when we do not feel grateful with what we have and constantly chase what we don’t have. Time to work on your marriage?

Start first by loving yourself as this will tell you how much ignoring oneself can cause havoc in core relationships. Why should your wife bear the brunt of what’s going on? Your full commitment

is what she seeks and here you are mulling over a relationship that is based on selfishness and need-basis.

Can you please re-evaluate what your priorities are and put your life back in order?

Do this for yourself and your family…Your work, health and state of mind will start to improve. It’s time you took charge and I am sure you know how to do this.

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1431 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 04, 2024

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Relationship
Hi Anu Kindly refer to my earlier question and your answer. In july 2023, she came to my office and literally touched my feet and apologized to me for her wrongdoings, like talking to my wife and further character assassination. She told me that all people are lying to me. I forgave to her and thought that she is possessive and in her possessiveness, she took that step. From july 2023 till June, 2024, she continued to put various allegations on me that I have a affair with my office staff etc. I blocked her so many times in past one year, but she used to come to me through various persons. I told her many times that if she has any proof of my affair, show to me and i would explain to you. But she used to say sorry and reunite. In june, 2024, she again levelled allegation on me that I am having affair with my friends wife and again, she informed this to my wife that I am having affair with various women and she used to give me money and gave various household items to me. She also informed my wife about our personal things to my wife. In short, she tried to ruin my respect, my family. In wife became quite depressive on hearing these things. I totally blocked her from my phone and she is continuing to call my friends and assassinating my character. My friends know me quite well. When my wife tried to backfire on her, like contacting her relative on facebook, inquiring about her whereabouts, she suddenly took a U turn and said to my friend that I should stop my wife, else she would be thrown out of her house (she is a widow). I would never forgive her nor would return to her. I invested around 7 lakhs on building a house on collaboration with her and in her distress time, i used to take care of her and her house, like providing ration to her, giving her money to run household chores, paying her electricity bill etc. But i came to conclusion that she was just using me. If she would have really loved me, she couldt try to destroy me reputation and my family. But even after this, I never contacted her and tried to ruin her.
Ans: Dear Harish,
When you asked for help in your first question, it only meant you wanted to get out of this sticky situation. Now, I am happy that you were able to realize that she was using you. Hope you have decided to keep her at a distance from you and the family. When you started to dream of a parallel life with her and spend money to construct a home etc, you were again running away from your marriage and trying you luck elsewhere. Do try and give your marriage a fair chance and now that your wife knows most of it, do start on a clean state if that's what she wishes to as well. Thank you for sharing...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |479 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 30, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello sir/mam I am in trouble and anxiety bcz of the problem. Problem is, last year I met a girl in Instagram, we have chatted and got closed, sometimes I help her with money as she was telling she is preparing for government job and need some money for personal reasons. Once she needed mobile phone I ordered online for her to given address. The UPI that I used to send money does not belongs to her when I was asking she was telling she is her junior studying in same coaching centre. Later after 2-3 months our conversation went sexual and 2-3 times we had sexual conversation. But in every 3-4 days she was demanding money. And I send her frequently. When later I realised she is talking to me only for money then I tried to avoid her. Now the Junior whom I used to send money was calling me and telling me that the girl always saying you are family member and sending money. That's why I called you. She has taken some money and she supposed to return me in 2-3 days but not picking my call pls give me 2k it's urgent. When I denied he told I will give you back once she will return so I gave him 2k. Later again he called me that he called her father and his father is asking your contact number then only her father will return money. And ask me if I can give him 2k more he will not share my number to her father, so I given him again 2k. Now a man blackmailing me with girl's contact number saying he is her brother. She used to talk to me what is my relationship with her ? How do I know her? Bcz she has run away with someone and missing since 3-4 days and she left her phone in home. What should I do?
Ans: You're in a difficult and potentially dangerous situation. It appears you've been targeted in a scam, where emotional manipulation and blackmail are at play. The best course of action is to stop all communication with these individuals immediately and avoid sending any more money. Document everything you've experienced so far, including messages and transactions, as this could be important if you need to seek legal advice. It's also advisable to contact local authorities to report the scam and seek their guidance on how to protect yourself from further harassment. Prioritize your safety and well-being by distancing yourself from this situation as much as possible.

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |479 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 30, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello sir/mam I am in trouble and anxiety bcz of the problem. Problem is, last year I met a girl in Instagram, we have chatted and got closed, sometimes I help her with money as she was telling she is preparing for government job and need some money for personal reasons. Once she needed mobile phone I ordered online for her to given address. The UPI that I used to send money does not belongs to her when I was asking she was telling she is her junior studying in same coaching centre. Later after 2-3 months our conversation went sexual and 2-3 times we had sexual conversation. But in every 3-4 days she was demanding money. And I send her frequently. When later I realised she is talking to me only for money then I tried to avoid her. Now the Junior whom I used to send money was calling me and telling me that the girl always saying you are family member and sending money. That's why I called you. She has taken some money and she supposed to return me in 2-3 days but not picking my call pls give me 2k it's urgent. When I denied he told I will give you back once she will return so I gave him 2k. Later again he called me that he called her father and his father is asking your contact number then only her father will return money. And ask me if I can give him 2k more he will not share my number to her father, so I given him again 2k. Now a man blackmailing me with girl's contact number saying he is her brother. She used to talk to me what is my relationship with her ? How do I know her? Bcz she has run away with someone and missing since 3-4 days and she left her phone in home. Again after 2 days He msged me that he is her brother's friend and he has this phone, if I pay some money he will destroy everything like all the chat that he recovered by the help of a data recovery guy. What should I do? I think it's a scam or will there be any legal issues in future?
Ans: You're in a difficult and potentially dangerous situation. It appears you've been targeted in a scam, where emotional manipulation and blackmail are at play. The best course of action is to stop all communication with these individuals immediately and avoid sending any more money. Document everything you've experienced so far, including messages and transactions, as this could be important if you need to seek legal advice. It's also advisable to contact local authorities to report the scam and seek their guidance on how to protect yourself from further harassment. Prioritize your safety and well-being by distancing yourself from this situation as much as possible.

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Is laundry franchise business is profitable?
Ans: The laundry business is a profitable venture due to consistent demand, low entry barriers, and a recurring revenue model. Urban areas, in particular, drive growth with their high population of working professionals, students, and families who prefer outsourcing laundry services for convenience.

Profit margins typically range between 20% and 40%, with opportunities to boost earnings through additional services like ironing, dry cleaning, and fabric care. The business offers flexibility in investment and scalability, from self-service laundromats to
full-service operations.

However, challenges such as competition, operational costs, and seasonal demand fluctuations require efficient management. With proper planning, market research, and a focus on customer satisfaction, the laundry business can provide steady income and long-term growth potential.

Things to Consider

1. Research and Location: Target high-demand areas such as residential neighbourhoods, business districts, or near universities.
2. Business Model: Decide between self-service laundromats, full-service laundry, mobile laundry (pickup and delivery), or dry cleaning services.
3. Investment: Budget for equipment, supplies, and operational costs. Franchising can be a lower-risk option for new entrepreneurs.
4. Setup and Legal Requirements: Register the business, obtain necessary licenses, and invest in high-quality, eco-friendly equipment and detergents.
5. Services and Pricing: Offer competitive pricing for services such as washing, ironing, dry cleaning, and delivery. Consider subscription plans or loyalty programs to attract regular customers.
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The laundry business can be a sustainable and profitable venture with strategic planning and effective management.

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Pushpa

Pushpa R  |42 Answers  |Ask -

Yoga, Mindfulness Expert - Answered on Jan 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 09, 2025Hindi
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I’ve been practicing yoga for a while now, but I’ve recently started noticing some discomfort in my lower back, especially after doing forward folds and back bends. I try to listen to my body and not push myself too hard, but sometimes I still feel strain or tightness in my back the next day. I’m especially concerned about preventing any long-term damage, and I’d appreciate some tips on how to protect my back while still getting the benefits of these stretches.
Ans: Discomfort in the lower back during yoga is often due to improper alignment or over-stretching. Here’s how to protect your back while continuing your practice:

Engage Your Core: Always activate your core muscles during forward folds and backbends. A strong core supports your lower back and prevents strain.

Modify Forward Folds: Avoid rounding your lower back. Instead, keep your spine long and bend from your hips, not your waist. You can slightly bend your knees to reduce tension on your lower back.

Gentle Backbends: For backbends, focus on opening your chest rather than over-arching your lower back. Start with smaller poses like Cobra Pose (Bhujangasana) and gradually work towards deeper bends like Camel Pose (Ustrasana) with proper guidance.

Use Props: Blocks or cushions can help reduce strain and improve alignment. For example, place a block under your hands during forward folds.

Stretch Your Hamstrings and Hips: Tight hamstrings and hips can pull on your lower back, causing discomfort. Incorporate poses like Reclined Hand-to-Big-Toe Pose (Supta Padangusthasana) and Pigeon Pose (Eka Pada Rajakapotasana).

It’s crucial to work with a yoga coach who can assess your alignment and suggest modifications tailored to you. This will help you avoid injury and enjoy a safer practice.

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Radiant YogaVibes
https://www.instagram.com/pushpa_radiantyogavibes/

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Pushpa R  |42 Answers  |Ask -

Yoga, Mindfulness Expert - Answered on Jan 09, 2025

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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7478 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jan 09, 2025

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Money
Am currently 50...I dont hv job. .Iam invested in mmt but right now am 15% on my PF....I invested 19lacs on mkt. ...wht shud ido ?
Ans: You have made bold moves in investing Rs. 19 lakhs in the market. Being 15% down on your portfolio is concerning but manageable. Let us evaluate your current position and suggest actionable steps.

Key Concerns
Jobless Situation: Absence of steady income creates financial pressure.

Market Volatility: A 15% loss indicates exposure to high-risk investments.

Emergency Needs: Liquidity might be limited if all funds are in the market.

Long-Term Goals: Planning for retirement is essential at this stage.

Strengths
Investments in Market: Rs. 19 lakhs is a good corpus to build wealth.

Time to Recover: At 50, there is still time for strategic financial planning.

Aggressive Approach: Shows you are willing to take risks, which can be an advantage.

Recommendations
Reassess Portfolio Allocation
Review your investments in mutual funds or stocks.

Shift a portion to balanced or hybrid funds for stability.

Reduce exposure to high-risk segments like small caps or sectoral funds.

Create a Contingency Fund
Set aside Rs. 3-5 lakhs for emergencies.

Use liquid funds or short-term fixed deposits for easy access.

Explore Income Sources
Find part-time or freelance opportunities to ease financial stress.

Rental income, tutoring, or consulting can supplement your needs.

Stop Panic Selling
Do not redeem investments in a downturn.

Hold onto quality assets for market recovery.

Diversify Investments
Avoid putting all money in equities.

Consider fixed income options like Senior Citizen Savings Scheme (when eligible), or debt funds.

Plan for Retirement
Evaluate the gap between your current corpus and retirement needs.

Use Systematic Withdrawal Plans (SWP) later for regular post-retirement income.

Monitor Regularly
Review your portfolio every 6 months.

Seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner for rebalancing.

Final Insights
Your situation requires balanced risk-taking and income generation strategies. Preserve capital while focusing on gradual recovery. Discipline and informed decisions will help secure your financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |479 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 09, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
i have been married for months and recently found out that my husband is talking secretly with his workmate like 2 months before wedding.i saw all the conversation it seems that both of them are flirting with each other.but then my husband clarify that it was nothing and nothing happened between them but now im literally confuse if i had the right decision of marrying him.And we talk honetly and he told me everything but still i have this doubt esp we will be a long distance again????And he promise he will not talk again with anyone he gave me all his password for all his account and he even buy cctv so that i can monitor him while his away.please help me i dont know what to do i love him dearly and i want to move forward with our future but still have this doubts what if he will do it again????
Ans: The fact that your husband has been open and taken steps to reassure you, like sharing his passwords and even installing CCTV, shows that he's trying to rebuild trust and be transparent. These actions suggest he's serious about addressing your concerns and committed to making you feel secure in the relationship.

That said, rebuilding trust isn't something that happens instantly. It takes time, consistent effort, and ongoing communication. It's important to acknowledge your feelings and give yourself the space to process them. Feeling doubt after something like this is a normal response, but it doesn't have to define your relationship going forward.

It's vital to keep the lines of communication open. Talk openly about your feelings, worries, and needs. This kind of dialogue can help both of you understand each other better and strengthen your bond. You might also find it helpful to discuss and agree on clear boundaries for interactions with others, especially given the long-distance aspect of your relationship. This can help create a sense of security and prevent misunderstandings.

While it's important to acknowledge what happened, try to focus on the present and what you both can do to nurture your relationship moving forward. If you find that your doubts and anxieties are overwhelming, seeking the guidance of a couples' therapist might be beneficial. A therapist can help facilitate deeper conversations and provide strategies to rebuild trust and strengthen your relationship.

It's okay to feel unsure, but also recognize the effort your husband is putting in. Trust takes time to rebuild, but with love, dedication, and mutual effort, you can move forward together. Remember, it's a journey, and it's okay to take things one step at a time.

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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