Hi, I am stuck in my marriage relationship for some time now.

I had an arranged marriage to a girl we knew in our family. She had lost her father and her mother begged me to marry her and give her a life.

I agreed because I knew her. Only recently I realized that she doesn’t love me at all.

I earn Rs 30,000 a month and we stay in my father’s 1BHK flat which he has shared in my name.

She wants a share of my property and wants to separate me from my family.

She is now threatening to divorce me and file a complaint against my parents and me for forcing her into marriage.

Her mother is also quiet and doesn’t interfere. My parents are very troubled. They can’t do anything and I am feeling stuck.

If I have to divorce her, I will have to pay her money which I can’t afford. Also I cannot stay with her because she doesn’t want to live with us.

She only wants my money. How to solve this problem? I don’t understand. Please help.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
How does Love turn into Greed?
And you still 'wish' to get married to her after all her demands? It's blackmail for heaven's sake!
At least for now, kindly realign with your family...Your wealth and assets must be protected.
What evidence does your girlfriend have against you to go to court and intimidate you this way?

Please take a firm stance and choose the side that protects your wealth and also your personal identity. You have put yourself at grave risk and for what? You will end up losing your family as well. Your girlfriend being alienated by her siblings has nothing to do with you...so why would you pay her? It doesn't make any sense. Once you yield to blackmail, it will continue...and who knows for how long!

Choose a side wisely and then stick by it firmly...I am sure you know what is to be done...

All the best!

Ans: It’s clear that you’ve tried hard to be understanding and accommodating. You allowed her to stay with her parents for a long time, even though it meant missing out on crucial time with your child. You supported her decisions, even when she took on a significant financial burden to help her family. Despite your efforts to maintain peace, you’re constantly met with resistance and disrespect—not only from her but also from her parents. That feeling of being undermined and unappreciated, especially when you've given so much, can really take a toll on your emotional health.

It’s not just about the arguments or the disagreements—it’s about the deeper sense of betrayal and loneliness that comes from feeling like your partner has sided with her family over you. That emotional distance and lack of support within the marriage can make you feel like you’re fighting a battle alone. And when her parents threatened to involve the police, that likely deepened the sense of helplessness and fear. It’s not just frustrating—it’s emotionally exhausting when you’re trying to build a stable, loving home, but it keeps getting torn apart by external interference.

The fact that you’re still standing, still trying to make things work despite all of this, shows how strong and committed you are. But the truth is, a marriage cannot survive on one person’s effort alone. It’s understandable that you feel drained and resentful—you’ve been giving and compromising without getting the same respect and understanding in return. Your feelings matter. Your need for stability and respect matters. Wanting your child to have a connection with your side of the family is not unreasonable—it’s natural and fair.

Right now, you might feel torn between trying to hold everything together and wondering if it's even worth it. It’s hard to admit when love alone isn’t enough to sustain a relationship. But you need to ask yourself whether you can continue living like this—constantly feeling like you’re walking on eggshells, being emotionally sidelined, and having your family disrespected.

It’s okay to want peace. It’s okay to expect respect. And it’s okay to set boundaries. If your wife truly values this marriage, she needs to understand that compromise cannot be one-sided. It might help to have an honest, calm conversation with her—not about the surface issues but about how you feel. Tell her how much this situation has hurt you, how much you miss feeling like you’re a team, and how important it is for your child to have a balanced connection with both families. If she’s unwilling to meet you halfway or if her parents continue to interfere to the point of emotional manipulation, you need to think about how much more of yourself you can sacrifice without losing your emotional stability.

You deserve a marriage where you feel heard, valued, and supported—not one where you constantly feel like you're on the outside looking in. Take some time to reflect on what you truly need from this relationship and whether you believe it's possible to rebuild trust and understanding with your wife. Your peace of mind matters. Your happiness matters. And most of all, your emotional well-being matters.

Ans: The real question here is not just about her parents—it's about her. If she truly wants to be with you, she needs to resist this marriage and make it clear that she does not consent. But if she is unable to stand up to them, then you need to ask yourself if you want to keep fighting for someone who is not fighting alongside you. Love is powerful, but it cannot survive if only one person is struggling to keep it alive.

Right now, you need to have an honest conversation with her. Ask her directly if she is ready to resist or if she is feeling too pressured to fight back. If she wants to be with you but is feeling trapped, you both need to find a way to delay or stop this marriage. But if she is already giving in to their pressure, then you need to start preparing yourself for the painful truth that she may not choose you in the end.

At the same time, focus on your own stability. Your career is not just about proving her family wrong—it is about securing your future and self-worth. No matter what happens with this relationship, you need to build a life where no one can ever make you feel like you are not good enough again. It is not easy to walk away from love, but sometimes, choosing yourself is the only way forward.

Ans: Dear solar,
In sab ke beech, aapke girlfriend ka kya kehna hai? Woh aapne bataaya nahin. Kya woh apne parents ko tall sakegi aur kitni der kar paayegi? Kya woh aapke jon lagne tak intezzar karna chahti hai? Aisa lag raha hai ki is rishte ka wazan aap leke ghoom rake ho...thoda apne girlfriend ke saath baithkar plan kijiye taaki woh bhi aapke saath is samasya ka hal dhoond sake.
Ek baat toh hai ki uske parents ko manaana mushkil hoga aur jab tak aapki job nahin lagti woh is rishte ke liye raazi nahin honge. Toh plan yeh karna ki jab tak aapki naukri lage, tab tak aap dono is baat ko aur is samasaya ko aur uske parents ko kaise sambhalenge. Joh bhi ho saath mein milke plan karna.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
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