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Married Muslim Man Loves Another Woman: Seeking Guidance

Ravi Mittal |536 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 18, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 18, 2024Hindi

Relationship

I had a relationship with a married woman and I'm also married. As we're a Muslim so having some boundaries about dating and physical relationship but yes on phone and chat only, I never ever even touched physically due to we believe we'll meet Afterlife not here. In our religion wife will meet her last worldly husband Afterlife (in heaven) now problem is we both have no issues our spouses but we love to each other badly. I'm 42 she's 38. And also in our religion chatting, talking, with girl or boy after married or without is forbidden but (Official Nikah) if possible so. Now tell me what should I do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am not sure how you can approach this relationship. I am sure your wife or her husband will have issues if they come to know of it. I am unsure of any religious rules but from a general perspective, all I can suggest is that you should open up to your wife about this relationship and maybe seek help from a marriage counselor to see what is going wrong in your marriage that you are seeking the same emotions outside of it.

Best Wishes.

RelationshipReply

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Asked by Anonymous - Dec 17, 2023Hindi

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I am 52 year old married manwith good physique and working as a higher group executive . For last few months I m in a relationship with a married lady who works with me and in just next subordinate to me who is married and 40 yr old. In my married life though I love my wife, she is keeping distance from me and our relationship is not at all in good shape. Also We r staying in separate house. I have a son 18yrs. My extramarital partner is also not happy in her family life. But she is very caring and expressed her respect and affection for me. I also care for her and I expressed my feelings to her. We respect each other very much and we feel good when we together. Our relationship is purely mutual respect and caring. No physical attraction for each other ,except occasional hug with affection. I donot know the future of our relationship. What should I do. I tried to just move on but unable to do so. She also tried as she told me, but whenever we come across we could not resist to think again and again for each other. Please advise.

Ans: You are having an emotional affair, not a physical one. You have a choice — you say you love your wife, so one option is to try and salvage your marriage. The other one is closing that chapter and moving on with your extramarital partner — but is she willing to do the same as well? No point remaining stuck in limbo for years to come. Make a decision as to your future and move ahead.

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Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Aug 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 21, 2024Hindi

Relationship

hi, I m well settled professional aged 45 having two childrens and married life. after 20 years, since and due to covid 19 I meet my first but undisclosed love of before marriage. She is also married and have one kid and cool life. we never went physical but are very attached emotionally. the relationship empower and delight both of us. we never tried to meet or any other kind of advantage. Just a few message daily and occasional phone call. She some time hit this relationship as wrong, is this wrong? should we try to discountine this? please guide

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

Is there any reason why connecting or interacting with her feels wrong at times? Do you have romantic feelings for her? Does your wife know that you have reconnected with an ex-undisclosed love? I think you can figure out why it feels wrong if you are honest with yourself.

Whether you should discontinue this relationship or not, depends on how you feel about her and where you see yourself with her. But all of that is secondary. First things first, take some time to reflect. Maybe put yourself in your wife's shoes and imagine if she had reconnected with an old love without your knowledge. How would you feel, regardless of how innocent and pure the relationship is? I think that should also give you some clarity.

I hope you will do the right thing once you figure it out.

Best Wishes.

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 18, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 07, 2024

Relationship

Hi ma'am, am 27 yr old guy [not yet married]. Recently i had a relationship with a married woman who has 3 kids and happily living with her husband, we were chatting regarding work and slowly started dating. It slowly became love between us and had a few physical relationship with her. Now she loves me so much that, am important than her husband and kids. Actually i dont have much of a problem her her. Whenever we fight,she begs me to talk with her, we meet, again we get wet. But my concern is, if i get married how should i end the relationship with her. But i feel having sex with her. I want sex. What should i do. Please help me

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
This entire thing is about sex. Kindly don't mislead her any longer... End this and please find someone else who is not married and vulnerable. This is not all about you and your physical needs. This is also about who you are with and what situation of life they are in. A little thought beyond just you and your needs can help.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Asked by Anonymous - Jan 18, 2025Hindi

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I am btech graduate and have good industry IT experience in development in TCS with 15 lpa, but parents pressurized to take government job , and i got a government job of junior assistant at pay level 3 but i am not liking the job as there is no respect and our senior ask to fill the water bottle , i want to switch to IT for my future? Still i confused?

Ans: I am quite surprised - "our senior ask to fill the water bottle". Simply deny doing that. Do your work seriously for which you are paid. Give departmental exam for promotion. You can prepare yourself for Indian civil service exam. Do not leave Govt. job.

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Asked by Anonymous - Nov 17, 2024Hindi

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I am 58 + years old who retired from government service after working for 36 years. I had done M.E mechanical and worked in the marine field. I am a pensioner who is financially sound and with no liabilities. I have a good fitness routine in the morning as well as in the evening , however I find it difficult to pass my time in the day and want to make it meaningful. I am done with my existing skills and keen to learn some totally new concepts and acquire skills specially in areas such as sustainable energy specially green hydrogen, solar , ethanol blending , EV etc. I may like to become a consultant or maybe start my own small venture in future to keep myself busy. I am ready to devote ample time. If nothing works out atleast I would have acquired knowledge in areas which interest me. How do I go about acquiring the new skills.

Ans: The best way to acquire skill is to see NPTEL videos. Its free. If you want certificates then you have to give exam. Cost is very less. Normally professors from IITs teach these courses and you will get certificates from IITs.

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Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 22, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 31, 2024Hindi

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I've joined offline PW coaching this year and having no guidance at all i didn't knew the ground reality of coachings and stem subjects. I've already spent 1 lakh for 2 year course and now coaching is just draining and managing it with school where coaching is not helping at all even tho they're tied up with the school which is resulting in backlogs. I'm unable to manage self study time to actually focus because if my basics aren't clear then how am I supposed to do the advanced ones. I'm thinking to leave the coaching, there's also a lot of pressure and demotivation from parents as they think I'm the one causing the problems but if I had known about it then I wouldn't have chosen coaching at all, I don't have any issues with the subjects I chose for me as I do I want know and learn them but not this way with issues where even the teachers are not supportive

Ans: Assess the Value: Reflect on whether the coaching sessions are enhancing your understanding of subjects or if they're contributing to confusion and backlogs. If the latter is true, it may be worth reconsidering your enrollment.

Discuss with Stakeholders: Communicate your concerns with your parents and, if possible, the coaching administration. They might offer solutions such as adjusted schedules or additional support.

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Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 22, 2025

Question by Sudhanshu - Feb 17, 2025Hindi

Career

My daughter's jee nta score is 24.1256. She is adamant to take engineering course. I know that this is a very poor score. What should be good for her, to take admission in a private engineering college or do some other course? Please guide.

Ans: Assess Interests and Strengths: Ensure that engineering aligns with her genuine interests and strengths. Passion and aptitude are crucial for long-term success.

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Question by shyamala - Feb 21, 2025Hindi

Career

Respected sir, I am shyamala, thank you for your quick response. Can you guide me in detail as a mother how to train my son to achieve his goal of becoming scientist in ISRO or any other central government companies. Can you provide me class wise tips that i can follow like for class 7 what should be his milestones next class 8 , 9, 10, 11th and 12th. I need to know the career path or study path that i can make him to follow. Thank you

Ans: Hello Shyamla, please ask the same query/question under the follow-up section of my previous reply so that I can go through your 1st question and my reply to it. Sorry for inconvienece caused to you. But there is no altenative with me as I have to reply many questions in a day and can't remember all the replies. Thanks

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Question by AP - Feb 21, 2025Hindi

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Sir, my son got 96 percentile in JEE mains . What is scope for him. Can he get NIT in general category on the basis of this percentile, advice plz

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With the score of 96 %tile, your son has chances to get the admission in one of the NIT under OC.

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Asked by Anonymous - Feb 21, 2025Hindi

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I started working after my BTech graduation, in a software company since 2.5 yr in a testing role for manual and automation. I had started with development and was starting to get the grip of it but to some performance issues was put in pip and was put into testing role in the first year itself . Since then I am trying to get back to some learning but started to lose interest in development and I am getting scared to make a decison on which way to go now. I am slowly losing interest in my current role due to this and I don't seem to be able to regain focus and interest due to many not good experiences in this company . I am thinking to try something outside of software industry either banking or start pursuing data science and ml , is it the right way or am I not thinking right should I try to explore other fields . I see people around me upskilling in the current path in and I don't see myself wanting that . I want to move forward so please guide on how to regain interest to learn and make a decison on what to do next .

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Question by amit - Feb 12, 2025Hindi

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Sir, I am graduate in Electronics & communication Engg, having 13 years of experience in Telecom industry- project management and Operations & Maintenance. Left the job in 2019. Also did PGDBM(marketing) and NISM-Series-VIII: Equity Derivatives certified. My age is 43 yrs. Want to start my career again, but not in Telecom. Is there any option for me?

Ans: It seems to be you were more in management related job.At this age it is very difficult to switch.So you need to follow the same pattern of job as per my knowledge.You can take the views of other experts also.But at 43 it is difficult to take a U turn.Professor.

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Question by Akshay - Feb 03, 2025Hindi

Career

Sir, Which college CSE is better Bits , Mesra, Ranchi or DTU

Ans: As a counsellor I can't pinpoint any institute as the best.It is ethically wrong.You search their national ranking and if possible visit those institutes.Professor........:)

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Feb 21, 2025

Question by Swati - Dec 29, 2024Hindi

Career

Hello, My kid is in 9th std CBSE currently and we are looking forward to knowing different career options available in today's times. How do we do that? Second query, is how can we analyse and find her area of interest to plan her future accordingly. Can you please help me with these two queries. Thanks

Ans: Let me know her most favourite subject first,then I can guide.

See more questions »

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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