Love Guru |204 Answers |Ask -Follow
Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 21, 2021
Hi.
I am a 40-year-old male and my wife is 36 years. We have two kids.
Our marriage is normal like mostly couples.
I like to try and experience different things for which my wife is not ready. She is always happy in the normal, lazy sex life.
She never tries to initiate things or perform well in sex. She just doesn’t cooperate.
It has been 11 years since we got married and I have tried to convince her plenty of times for some extra fun but she always refused.
She is beautiful but doesn’t like to wear sexy or modern clothes. That’s why I started looking out of the box for satisfying myself.
Is there any other thing I can do?
What do you mean by ‘looking out of the box’? I have news for you, buddy -- marriage is a box and you’re inside it!
I can understand your frustration, but it’s not like your wife is refusing you sex and you need to look for it elsewhere. I suspect that she’s refusing to cooperate because it seems unnatural to her and there’s some moral dilemma attached to her manner of thinking.
The first thing you need to do is help her remove the stigma she attaches to being sexually adventurous.
Explain that all normal couples experiment in the bedroom and that as long as it’s consensual, what the two of you do to each other behind closed doors is not for anyone to judge.
Maybe a sex therapist could better able to explain to her that giving in to some of your suggestions and fantasies is normal and not some depraved act that she should be embarrassed about.
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