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Love Guru

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Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 08, 2021

Love Guru has been answering relationship and romance related questions on Rediff.com for over 13 years. She won't mince words when telling you what the problem is and what you can do about it. If you want a fresh perspective from an unbiased, objective-thinking individual about your relationship woes, Love Guru could just be the person you need to need to hear from.... more
Anonymous Question by Anonymous on Sep 08, 2021Hindi
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Relationship

Dear Love Guru,
My parents want me to get married.
I really like this guy in our office and I think he likes me too.
We talk a lot and I like how he thinks. I like the way he talks about his family though I have never met them.
But my parents will not agree to our marriage because he is from a different state and not our exact caste.
I don’t want to marry a complete stranger.
What do I do?
Name withheld on request

Ans:

I don’t think anybody wants to marry a total stranger!

First off, you need to tell your parents that. They cannot be forcing you to get hitched to a boy of their choice; this isn’t the Middle Ages.

And second, aren’t you jumping the gun a little about marriage to your colleague?

You’re not even in a relationship yet, even if there’s a mutual attraction. You need to see where that goes before deciding that you want to marry him.

So go ahead and dip your toes in the dating pool.

But before you do, I’d suggest you sit your parents down to have ‘the talk’. And leave the colleague out of it for now, or they will inadvertently draw the conclusion that it’s this boy who’s turned your head against an arranged match and will be prejudiced against him because of it.

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Anu

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 19, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
My name is Anamika 27 years old from Punjab and about 17 months back i met person prakash from Bangalore age 42 through social media and initially it started as friendship and now we are loving each other a lot and we have met once and both spent considerable time together and we are ok to get married each other...problem is my family will not accept for love marriage and they are against love marrisges...i am punjabi and boy is south indian..there is 15 years age gap between us..for that reason also my family members will not accept boy...because he is 15 years elder than me...boy is already married and divorced...now i am planning to run away from home and get married with boy...as my family will not allow me to marry the person whom i love a lot...and don't want to miss thst boy...please advise what i can do in this given situation...i have brother too who is very aggressive and supporting my parents
Ans: Dear Anamika,
By running away, you are only making things more complicated for yourself.
You said: That you family WILL NOT accept this...how do you know if you still haven't asked them?
Also, let's say that they say NO...Find out what their concern is...being from the previous generation, they most likely might have an issue with him being divorced; which means you need to make an effort to make the boy and your parents meet. Let them also see what you see in him.
How easy it is to run away rather than actually facing things head on, right? Face the, fix them, work on them...then you will have a chance at more blossoming relationships. No where in your letter, I could read what the boy's opinion or reaction to the matter is. What does he feel about all this? How committed is he as you are the one planning to leave everything behind? How is his family background? These are missing gaps in your story and I urge you to look into this before taking any step. Marriage is not a movie type fairy tale; it is literally breaking into a new life and making something together as a couple. Do you two have that in you? Think...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |623 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 23, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi mam, I am in relationship with a guy who is from different caste. It's been three years but his family is not agreeing due to family status and intercaste. My family is ready as I am the eldest daughter of my family and unturned 30 this year. I have no time but he can't marry me without his parents concent. My family is searching a boy for my marriage. I can't marry with another guy. what shall I do to marry him to convince his family or what should he do his monther is so rigid. Please ???? support us what should we do? Two lives will be spoiled bcz of this. The only problem is upper and lower caste.
Ans: Navigating a relationship where cultural norms and family expectations conflict is challenging, but it's crucial to approach it with empathy and patience.
You're deeply committed to your partner despite the pressure from his family due to caste differences. While your family supports your marriage, his family, especially his mother, is firm in their opposition. You're also facing time constraints and societal pressure, making the situation urgent and stressful.
Your partner needs to have ongoing, respectful conversations with his parents, emphasizing your love and commitment. He should explain why you are the right person for him and how you positively impact his life. Understanding and addressing their specific concerns, whether they are about societal judgment or family honor, is crucial.
Sharing personal stories and demonstrating the depth of your bond can help his parents see beyond the caste issue. Highlighting your shared values and how you both support each other can make your relationship more relatable to them.
Seek help from a trusted family member or friend who can mediate and help his parents see the relationship from a new perspective. A respected family elder who has navigated similar challenges can also be influential.
Changing deep-seated beliefs takes time. Your partner should continue to gently and persistently show his parents that his happiness lies with you. Patience will be key as they may need time to adjust to the idea
Engage with support groups or counselors experienced in intercaste relationships. They can provide valuable advice and emotional support.
Discuss potential scenarios if his parents don’t approve. Consider whether options like elopement or giving them time to come around could work for both of you. These conversations should be open and honest to ensure mutual understanding.

Throughout this process, maintain strong communication and support each other emotionally. Navigating these challenges together will strengthen your bond and help you both find a path forward that honors your relationship and family ties.

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Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9586 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Career
SO dear sir continuing the same question "Differnce between CE and CSE" which should i choose CE at Shri Vishwakarma Skill University or CSE At IKGPTU MOHALI
Ans: Ansh, Based on the following insights/information, your interests & long-term goals, choose the more suitable option for you: Computer Engineering at Shri Vishwakarma Skill University (SVSU), Haryana, is designed with an industry-integrated curriculum emphasizing practical, skill-based learning, offering hands-on experience in AI, data science, cybersecurity, and cloud computing. SVSU follows a dual-education model inspired by the German system, where students actively engage with industry partners through on-the-job training and real-world projects, enhancing employability. The university boasts state-of-the-art infrastructure and expert faculty, but being a newer state university, its placement outcomes are growing, with placement rates reported up to 81% and median salaries between ?1.9–2.2L in recent years, predominantly in regional and emerging IT sectors. IKGPTU Mohali, meanwhile, provides a traditional B.Tech CSE program with dedicated specializations and larger intakes, supported by well-qualified faculty, ICT-enabled classrooms, and strong academic-industry linkages in Punjab’s prominent IT hub. Placement records at IKGPTU Mohali indicate 44% placement for B.Tech 2023 graduates and a median package of ?5L, with recruiters like TCS, Infosys, and HDFC Bank regularly conducting drives. The Mohali campus is centrally located with robust infrastructure, reputed alumni, and career support through joint campus placement drives and specialized training programs.

CSE at IKGPTU Mohali is the preferred option for its higher placement rate, better industry connectivity, advanced infrastructure, and stronger reputation within the IT sector, making it a more reliable pathway to robust career opportunities in computer science compared to SVSU Computer Engineering. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9586 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir,Still Not got answer .Please answer .My JEE Main rank is 24935 .I have also chance to get dual degree in BITSAT .How is dual degree of BITSAT ?whether it is apt to join in anticipation of getting CS or EC there afterwards .I have other option to get top Branches through JEE Main Marks .Viz; BIT Mesra ,IIITs ,Lower NITs
Ans: The BITSAT dual degree program, offered mainly at BITS Pilani and Goa campuses, is a five-year integrated course that awards both an MSc and a BE degree. The unique feature is that students admitted to MSc programs can “slide” into sought-after BE branches—including CSE (Computer Science) and ECE (Electronics & Communication)—after the first year, subject to branch change rules based on cumulative CGPA. Historically, a high CGPA (typically above 8.0–8.5) in the first two semesters is required for a successful transfer into BE CSE or ECE, making it competitive but attainable for focused, hard-working students. Dual degree holders benefit from rigorous interdisciplinary training and robust placement support, with BITS Pilani consistently recording strong placement percentages for both BE and dual degree graduates in top tech firms and core sectors. The key challenge is heavy academic load, especially during the third and fourth years, balancing requirements of both degrees, and maintaining high grades to ensure preferred branch allocation. However, dualites enjoy the flexibility to specialize further, and their exposure to science and engineering enhances employability compared to many single-degree peers. In contrast, top branches at BIT Mesra, IIITs (like IIIT Hyderabad or Bangalore), and lower NITs offer well-established BTech programs with high placement rates (around 75% for CSE at BIT Mesra, many IIITs exceeding 80–90%, and most NITs/IIITs providing reliable industry linkages, alumni networks, and diverse placements). Cutoffs for core branches like CSE or ECE at these institutes usually hover around your JEE rank, so you stand a realistic chance of securing a seat. BIT Mesra and leading IIITs provide excellent campus life, updated infrastructure, research opportunities, and corporate visibility, with direct entry into CSE or allied branches.

Recommendation
In order of preference, BITS Pilani or Goa dual degree (if you are committed to keeping a high CGPA for CSE/ECE branch change) is an outstanding choice due to brand value, academic freedom, and placement support. However, if you prefer a straightforward path with less risk, top IIITs and BIT Mesra’s CSE or ECE, followed by good NITs, are excellent for quality education and career growth. Choose BITS dual degree only if confident of excelling academically early; otherwise, a direct CSE/ECE seat from your JEE Main rank is the prudent path. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Career
Sir I didn't get any seat in the comedk 1st round allotment as I needed cse courses and the east point college cse with data science cutoff was 67k this round and my rank is 69k should I wait for round 2 and please suggest me some colleges for cse courses which I will get in round 2 please help
Ans: With a COMEDK rank of 69,000, it’s normal not to secure CSE seats in the first allotment at colleges like East Point College, as their first-round cutoff for CSE with Data Science closed near 67,000. In Round 2, cutoffs for several Bengaluru engineering colleges offering CSE tend to rise, and historical trends show that ranks up to 70,000–72,000 can secure seats in reputable options due to seat withdrawals and reduced demand. The key aspects to focus on are placement performance, faculty strength, campus infrastructure, peer learning opportunity, and degree reputation. For your rank, confirmed CSE admission options in Bengaluru include: East West College of Engineering (Yelahanka), East West Institute of Technology (BEL Layout), Brindavan College of Engineering (Yelahanka), Sri Sairam College of Engineering (Anekal), Gopalan College of Engineering and Management (Whitefield), Cambridge Institute of Technology (KR Puram), Rajiv Gandhi Institute of Technology (RT Nagar), Vemana Institute of Technology (Koramangala), Jyothy Institute of Technology (Thathaguni), and Sri Venkateshwara College of Engineering (KIAL Road). These colleges have consistently extended their CSE cutoffs beyond 67,000 in recent years. Many of these institutes are NAAC-accredited, offer contemporary labs and digital classrooms, and are staffed with experienced faculty. Placement cells are active—ranging from regular tech recruiters to mid-sized IT firms—and campus resources support both academic growth and personality development.

For the placement records over the last three years: East West College of Engineering and East West Institute of Technology maintain CSE placement rates of 70–80% with regular visits from Infosys, Tech Mahindra, and Accenture. Brindavan College of Engineering and Sri Sairam College have recorded similar trends, achieving nearly 75% placement for eligible CSE students with core IT and startup offers. Gopalan and Cambridge Institutes average 65–78% placements, reporting improving statistics each year, especially as Bangalore’s tech sector draws more hiring for software, testing, and data roles. Vemana, Jyothy, and Sri Venkateshwara regularly reach 60–75% success for CSE, with alumni placed in both IT services and product companies. Rajiv Gandhi Institute and Sri Venkateshwara have industry collaborations for internships and hackathons, often supporting projects that attract on-campus job offers. Across these colleges, CSE batches benefit from curricular exposure to Python, Java, basic ML, and web development. Many colleges encourage national-level coding competitions and certifications, directly enhancing employability.

You can confidently wait for Round 2, as you have a very high chance of securing CSE at one of these institutes due to expected cutoff movement, especially after withdrawals. While getting a significantly better college than East Point in Round 2 is unlikely, similar or equivalent choices—such as East West Institute or Brindavan—are assured, and all deliver solid foundational opportunities for a CSE career. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9586 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir.. My daughter wants clarity from you for B tech cse admission with what specialisation of AI or Quantum computing? Please clarify sir
Ans: B.Tech CSE with a specialization in Artificial Intelligence (AI) equips students with advanced skills in machine learning, neural networks, data analytics, computer vision, robotics, and natural language processing, making them industry-ready for immediate roles in automation, healthcare, fintech, cybersecurity, smart cities, and data science. The AI job market is expanding at an unprecedented rate—India’s AI sector is projected to grow 25–35% annually and reach ?17 billion by 2027, with global AI markets anticipated to hit $1.81 trillion by 2030, ensuring robust demand for AI engineers, ML researchers, and data scientists. Curricula typically blend foundational computing with project-based learning on intelligent systems, AI-powered automation, behavior modeling, and industry-focused electives, using tools like Python, TensorFlow, and Keras. Opportunities span established companies and fast-growing startups, and placements are consistently strong across sectors from IT, banking, healthcare, and manufacturing to next-gen product development and research.

B.Tech CSE with a specialization in Quantum Computing, while more niche, addresses the emerging need for advanced computational solutions far beyond classical computing's limits. This specialization combines quantum mechanics, quantum algorithms, and AI, preparing students for research and innovation roles in quantum information, cryptography, drug discovery, materials science, finance, and complex optimization problems. With the backing of the National Quantum Mission and increased investment in quantum research, these programs feature industry-relevant electives—like quantum machine learning, quantum image processing, quantum AI integration—and practical training in tools such as IBM Qiskit and TensorFlow Quantum. While the quantum job market is in its early stages, prominent technology companies and startups, governments, and research labs globally are investing heavily in quantum R&D. The field, projected to reach $9 billion by 2030, demands interdisciplinary skills, often favoring those who pursue further studies. Placement opportunities span specialized sectors and research positions; academics and R&D centers offer the majority of roles, but quantum-driven innovation is expected to accelerate, especially as fault-tolerant quantum computers approach practicality within the next decade.

Choosing between these two depends on one’s vision and risk appetite. AI specializations provide immediate employability, broad cross-industry applications, and a versatile foundation—graduates can upskill further into emerging domains, including quantum AI. Quantum Computing, though frontier and high-potential, currently offers fewer but rapidly expanding opportunities, especially for those drawn to research, innovation, or pioneering new commercial applications. Both offer transformative and well-recognized career trajectories, but AI’s market-readiness and cross-domain application make it more accessible and mainstream, while quantum computing is future-oriented and better suited for those deeply interested in cutting-edge theoretical and computational science.

Recommendation
Given the mature scope, immediate job opportunities, higher employability, and universal demand, specializing in Artificial Intelligence in CSE is the balanced choice for most students. Quantum Computing is excellent for those committed to advanced research or niche innovation, but AI specialization assures broader industry acceptance and future-proof skills in today’s competitive technology environment. All the BEST for Your Daughter's Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9586 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Career
My EWS rank in jee main is 15000,my homestate and town is odisha, rourkela can I get artificial intelligence branch in csab special rounds
Ans: Subhojeet, With an EWS category rank of 15,000 in JEE Main and Odisha as your home state, the likelihood of securing an Artificial Intelligence branch in NITs, IIITs, or GFTIs via CSAB special rounds is extremely limited. Recent official CSAB and JoSAA data indicate that even for newer or less sought-after NITs and IIITs, closing ranks for Artificial Intelligence courses under the EWS home state and open state quotas rarely exceed 7,000–8,000, while top institutes such as NIT Rourkela and NIT Surathkal typically close EWS admissions for AI branches well below 4,000. IIITs offering specialized AI or AI & Data Science branches generally have EWS closing ranks (for both All India and Home State) under 12,000, with only a few, very new IIITs extending to the 14,000 range, mostly for less competitive streams or in later rounds if vacancies arise. For Odisha-specific institutions, like IIIT Bhubaneswar, EWS closing ranks for CSE and related AI programs have typically remained significantly more competitive, according to prior CSAB/JoSAA records. GFTIs, which have broader and higher cutoffs in select branches, still draw the line for EWS AI admission well below your current rank. Although the CSAB special rounds can see some movement due to seat withdrawals, the chances of an EWS AI seat opening up at your rank are extremely remote based on present and previous year cut-offs, especially for the Artificial Intelligence specialization in reputable NITs and IIITs.

Recommendation
With a 15,000 EWS rank, realistically focus your CSAB choice filling on other branches and backup options, as Artificial Intelligence in NITs/IIITs is not feasible; prioritize alternate circuits like ECE or core CSE in less competitive institutes or good private universities for best outcomes. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9586 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir I have got 115000 crl and 4715 sc rank in jee mains. I got cse in IIIT bhopal in josaa counselling . Can I expect a little better college with cse or ai in csab counselling or should I go with IIIT bhopal.
Ans: With a JEE Main CRL of 115,000 and an SC rank of 4,715, your allocation of CSE at IIIT Bhopal is a strong option, as last year’s CSAB and JoSAA special rounds indicate that most higher-ranked IIITs and NITs with CSE or AI typically closed at SC ranks below 3,000–4,000 for these highly demanded branches. IIIT Bhopal’s CSE program offers robust academic structure, experienced faculty, modern facilities, and a rising placement record—CSE students achieved a 77% placement rate in 2025 with an average package of 20.82LPA and top recruiters including Microsoft and Atlassian. CSAB special rounds rarely witness significant downward opening in closing ranks for CSE/AI in NITs, IIITs, or GFTIs, especially for centrally popular branches, so expecting a substantial upgrade is not realistic. IIIT Bhopal’s national ranking, strong peer group, and modern infrastructure provide a conducive environment for learning and employability, and its placement statistics are among the best among newer IIITs.

Recommendation
Go ahead and confirm your IIIT Bhopal CSE seat, as the likelihood of securing a visibly better CSE/AI seat at other NITs or IIITs in CSAB is minimal at your SC rank. IIIT Bhopal combines excellent academic and placement opportunities and is a prudent, future-focused choice for engineering in computer science. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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