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Love vs Family: 23 YO Woman Seeking Advice on Marrying Boyfriend Despite Parental Disapproval

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1794 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 04, 2025

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jan 27, 2025Hindi
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Relationship

Hello mam... I am in a relationship with guy from last 5yers..and I want to marry him..he is a good guy .financially stable and belong to a good family...but my parents are not allowing me to marry with him...I told them please meet him and then decide but they did not listen me .. what should I do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Ask the 'guy' to step in and do his bit to talk to your family. If they are able to appreciate what you appreciate in him, maybe things can work.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |663 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 08, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am in a relationship from last 2 years. We are very happy together. But when my parents came to know about us they apposed it as we both belong to different castes different social backgrounds i am from a upper middle class family and he is from lower middle class family. He made his career from scratch. I Don't want to hurt my parents by going against them. They always told me how much they care for me what they have done for me and all that i will ruin there reputation by getting married to him. On the other hand i love him so much , he is a very nice person he cares for me a lot and i know i will never be happy without him. What should i do.. nowadays i Don't feel like talking to anyone and my family thinks i dont love them and i am ignoring them which is not the case i just don't feel like talking. What should i do to convince them for us...?
Ans: Navigating this situation requires sensitivity and careful communication. Start by having an open and honest conversation with your parents. Explain your feelings and how much this relationship means to you. Emphasize the qualities that make your partner a good match for you, such as his care and commitment.

Acknowledge their concerns and express gratitude for their care and the sacrifices they've made for you. Reassure them that your love for them hasn't changed and that you value their opinions. Try to understand their perspective and address their worries about social status and reputation.

You might also consider arranging a meeting between your parents and your partner. This can help them see his positive attributes and understand why you love him. Show them how he has built his career from scratch, demonstrating his determination and resilience.

It's important to remain patient and give your parents time to adjust to the idea. Meanwhile, continue to express your love and respect for them, reinforcing that your decision is based on your happiness and future well-being.

Balancing your love for your partner and respect for your parents is difficult, but with open communication and patience, you can work towards finding a middle ground that respects everyone's feelings.

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |720 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 16, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello sir, I have been in relationship for 4 years, once my cousin elder caught me with my bf and told my parent. I told my parents that I wanted to get marry with him. But they denied. Due to my brother listening. Now it's been 4 years from that period. My bf is asking me for marriage. I wanted to convience my parents. But I m not able to tell them. And my Bf is less educated and I am employed graduate person. He works as a driver,but loves me a core. What shall I do to convience my parent. As Im of 25 years old and he is one year elder then me
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I understand that you are in a challenging situation. If you want to convince your parents, the first thing is to acknowledge their concerns. It is normal for parents to be worried about their child's future. You mentioned your partner is comparatively less educated than you and works as a driver; while every profession is equally important and as long as he is honest and hardworking and puts food on the table, he is doing well, parents can find the financial situation a little concerning. Instead of avoiding or being defensive about these concerns, address them. Let them know how you plan on tackling these differences in your relationship. Emphasize his character, personality, and all the qualities that drew you to him. Tell them how you have been in a stable relationship for 4 years, despite all the odds. In today's day and age, that is a huge thing. Convincing them would also require you to show that you are mature enough to make this decision so have the discussion once you and your partner have a solid plan and have the nitty-gritty all sorted.

Be practical and do not expect them to be onboard immediately. They have your best interest at heart and you know that your situation isn't ideal. Give them time to come around. It might take some compromises as well.

In the end, I would also urge you to think this through before introducing the relationship to your parents. Marriage is a big decision. Ultimately, it's your happiness and life at stake. Don't rush.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

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Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 27, 2026

Money
I am in SWP segments drawing from my corpus. I understand that SWP is fixed amount but when years go required amount should also go, so can set SWP in units instead of SWP in amount Please guide
Ans: You are thinking in the right direction. Your understanding is practical. Income should grow with time, not stay flat. That is a very important insight.

» Understanding SWP – Amount vs Units

SWP in fixed amount means you withdraw same Rs value every month
SWP in units means you redeem a fixed number of units

Reality:

Mutual fund platforms mainly allow SWP in amount, not in units
So unit-based SWP is not a standard option

» Challenge with Fixed Amount SWP

Your expenses will increase due to inflation
But SWP amount remains constant unless you change it

Result:

Your real income reduces over time
Purchasing power goes down

» Why SWP in Units is Not Ideal Anyway
Even if it was available:

Market goes up → you withdraw more money than needed
Market goes down → you withdraw less money when you need more

So income becomes unpredictable
This is not suitable for regular expenses

» Better Approach – Step-up SWP Strategy
Instead of units, follow this:

Start SWP with a comfortable amount
Increase SWP every year by 5% to 7%
This matches inflation and lifestyle increase

Example approach:

Year 1: Rs X per month
Year 2: Rs X + 5%
Year 3: Rs X + 5%

This gives:

Stability
Growth in income
Better control

» Bucket Strategy – More Stability
Divide your corpus into 3 parts:

Short-term (0–3 years expenses)
Keep in low-risk or liquid funds
Use this for SWP
Medium-term (3–7 years)
Balanced funds
Long-term (7+ years)
Equity funds

How it helps:

You don’t depend on market timing
You avoid selling equity in bad markets
Your income becomes stable

» Practical Execution

Run SWP only from short-term bucket
Refill this bucket once a year from other buckets
Review SWP amount annually and increase

» Tax Efficiency Insight

SWP is tax-efficient
Only capital gain portion is taxed
Long-term equity gains above Rs 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%
So gradual withdrawal is better than lump sum

» Finally

SWP in units is not required and not practical
Fixed SWP with annual increase is the right method
Use bucket strategy to protect income
Review once a year, not too frequently

This way, your income will grow, remain stable, and last longer.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ramalingamcfp/

...Read more

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