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Love vs Family: 23 YO Woman Seeking Advice on Marrying Boyfriend Despite Parental Disapproval

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1794 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 04, 2025

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jan 27, 2025Hindi
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Relationship

Hello mam... I am in a relationship with guy from last 5yers..and I want to marry him..he is a good guy .financially stable and belong to a good family...but my parents are not allowing me to marry with him...I told them please meet him and then decide but they did not listen me .. what should I do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Ask the 'guy' to step in and do his bit to talk to your family. If they are able to appreciate what you appreciate in him, maybe things can work.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |663 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 08, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am in a relationship from last 2 years. We are very happy together. But when my parents came to know about us they apposed it as we both belong to different castes different social backgrounds i am from a upper middle class family and he is from lower middle class family. He made his career from scratch. I Don't want to hurt my parents by going against them. They always told me how much they care for me what they have done for me and all that i will ruin there reputation by getting married to him. On the other hand i love him so much , he is a very nice person he cares for me a lot and i know i will never be happy without him. What should i do.. nowadays i Don't feel like talking to anyone and my family thinks i dont love them and i am ignoring them which is not the case i just don't feel like talking. What should i do to convince them for us...?
Ans: Navigating this situation requires sensitivity and careful communication. Start by having an open and honest conversation with your parents. Explain your feelings and how much this relationship means to you. Emphasize the qualities that make your partner a good match for you, such as his care and commitment.

Acknowledge their concerns and express gratitude for their care and the sacrifices they've made for you. Reassure them that your love for them hasn't changed and that you value their opinions. Try to understand their perspective and address their worries about social status and reputation.

You might also consider arranging a meeting between your parents and your partner. This can help them see his positive attributes and understand why you love him. Show them how he has built his career from scratch, demonstrating his determination and resilience.

It's important to remain patient and give your parents time to adjust to the idea. Meanwhile, continue to express your love and respect for them, reinforcing that your decision is based on your happiness and future well-being.

Balancing your love for your partner and respect for your parents is difficult, but with open communication and patience, you can work towards finding a middle ground that respects everyone's feelings.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |721 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 16, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello sir, I have been in relationship for 4 years, once my cousin elder caught me with my bf and told my parent. I told my parents that I wanted to get marry with him. But they denied. Due to my brother listening. Now it's been 4 years from that period. My bf is asking me for marriage. I wanted to convience my parents. But I m not able to tell them. And my Bf is less educated and I am employed graduate person. He works as a driver,but loves me a core. What shall I do to convience my parent. As Im of 25 years old and he is one year elder then me
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I understand that you are in a challenging situation. If you want to convince your parents, the first thing is to acknowledge their concerns. It is normal for parents to be worried about their child's future. You mentioned your partner is comparatively less educated than you and works as a driver; while every profession is equally important and as long as he is honest and hardworking and puts food on the table, he is doing well, parents can find the financial situation a little concerning. Instead of avoiding or being defensive about these concerns, address them. Let them know how you plan on tackling these differences in your relationship. Emphasize his character, personality, and all the qualities that drew you to him. Tell them how you have been in a stable relationship for 4 years, despite all the odds. In today's day and age, that is a huge thing. Convincing them would also require you to show that you are mature enough to make this decision so have the discussion once you and your partner have a solid plan and have the nitty-gritty all sorted.

Be practical and do not expect them to be onboard immediately. They have your best interest at heart and you know that your situation isn't ideal. Give them time to come around. It might take some compromises as well.

In the end, I would also urge you to think this through before introducing the relationship to your parents. Marriage is a big decision. Ultimately, it's your happiness and life at stake. Don't rush.

Best Wishes.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |11191 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Apr 28, 2026

Career
Hello sir. My son got 99.37 his general category rank is 10050 in maharshtra state in jee mains, 250 in bitsat. He is getting core subjects like ece, ee, in tier 2 nits and Iiits, as well as cse in coep, or tier 2 Iiits and nits like surat, Calicut, kurukshetra. And many such. Very confused which to choose. He doesnt have any hard opinion about branch selection. Also i dont know whteher to ho for ece, cse or specialized branches last ke Ai& ml or Data scienceKindly suggest which is better choice
Ans: Before answering your question, I want to clarify that, for BITSAT, a minimum score of around 250–260 is generally expected for MSc programs and 300+ for BE programs, so given your son’s 99.37 percentile in JEE Main and his appearance for JEE Advanced targeting IITs, it’s advisable not to prioritize BITS Pilani, as admission to top branches there is unlikely with this profile. You and your son should decide whether you prefer government or private colleges, or are open to both. All branches are good, and he should choose based on current interest while remaining adaptable if preferences change by the 2nd or 3rd year, besides considering job market trends. For example, a student joining ECE might later shift interest to CSE and succeed in software placements. Based on his JEE Main score, a tentative preference order could be NIT Calicut, Surathkal, Warangal, and Trichy (if available), then COEP Pune CSE, followed by NIT Surat, Kurukshetra, Calicut ECE/EE, tier-2 IIIT CSE, and specialized AI/DS branches only at reputed institutes. COEP CSE is a strong option with a 2024–25 average placement of ?11.62 LPA, a highest package of ?52.57 LPA, and a 91.82% CSE placement rate, so choosing COEP CSE over a lower-tier NIT EE branch and preferring a good NIT ECE over weaker IIIT or specialized branches are recommended. While AI/DS is promising, CSE offers broader flexibility. If your son performs well in JEE Advanced, these choices and options may improve significantly. It’s best to finalize after the JEE Advanced results are out. All the BEST for Your Son's Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |11191 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Apr 28, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 28, 2026Hindi
Career
Sir, my son has scored 92.24 percentile in JEE Main exam and his all india rank 121271 and 40322 obc ncl category. Home state is TN. Is there possible admission at Puducherry NIT, Or else any core branch at Trichy NIT. He also preferring for JEE ADVANCED
Ans: Based on your son’s score, admission to NIT Trichy is unlikely. In 2024, the HS OBC-NCL closing ranks at NIT Trichy were approximately: Chemical Engineering around 33,075, Mechanical at 23,504, Production at 31,383, Metallurgy at 43,010, and Civil at 47,466. This means Metallurgy and Civil are borderline options but not safe bets.

For NIT Puducherry, chances improve in the CSAB Special Round, especially for branches like Mechanical, Civil, and Electrical. For example, the 2024 CSAB closing rank for Mechanical OBC-NCL female-only was around 52,681, though gender-neutral and core branch cutoffs vary by quota.

It’s advisable to fill choices for lower-preference branches at NIT Trichy, all branches at NIT Puducherry, and also consider NIT Andhra, NIT Goa, NIT Agartala, NIT Mizoram, and NIT Meghalaya in CSAB if these NITs are preferred over Trichy and Puducherry.

For stronger backups in Tamil Nadu, your son can participate in TNEA counseling, though it may be challenging for non-TN board students. Options include CEG, MIT, SSN, PSG, CIT, Sri Sairam, and Kumaraguru, depending on board marks.

Encourage your son to continue preparing seriously for JEE Advanced. If possible and affordable, keep 3-4 reputed private engineering colleges in Tamil Nadu as backups, such as SSN, SNU, Amrita, Sathyabhama, and Saveetha through other admission routes. All the BEST for Your Son's Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |11191 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Apr 28, 2026

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |11191 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Apr 28, 2026

Career
Hello Sir, My daughter has secure 35500 Rank in Jee main we r staying in Rajasthan... general category....... Not interested in South & east States .... Interested in MNC. CSE, ECE, ...Branches ... please advice for
Ans: Rajesh Sir, Based on your daughter’s score, admission to MNIT Jaipur for CSE or ECE is not realistic, as the 2024 HS female closing ranks were around 8,836 for CSE, 15,405 for ECE, and 21,644 for EE. However, branches like Civil or Metallurgy might still be possible, especially with some lower-branch movement seen in CSAB rounds.

She can consider applying to IIIT Una, IIIT Kota, IIIT Bhopal, IIIT Sonepat, IIIT Nagpur, IIIT Bhagalpur, GFTI PEC Chandigarh (for lower branches), and BIT Mesra through JoSAA and CSAB counseling.

It’s also advisable to keep these backups in mind: LNMIIT Jaipur, Thapar Institute, JIIT Noida, Nirma University, PDEU, Bennett University, Shiv Nadar University, UPES, and Manipal Jaipur. Additionally, fill REAP Rajasthan options such as MBM Jodhpur, CTAE Udaipur, and RTU Kota.

If placements in MNCs are a priority, choosing CSE, AI, or IT branches in good private colleges is often better than other branches in reputed institutes.

Finally, reviewing JoSAA opening and closing ranks from the past 2–3 years will provide valuable insights and help your daughter confidently select and maximize her preferred choices. All the BEST for Your Daughter's Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |11191 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Apr 28, 2026

Career
Sir I have 93.5 percentile in jee mains and I am a kashmiri migrant i want to know that will I get top colleges of Maharashtra I have km merit rank in cap councelling of 28 based on last year out of 389 people and also please tell if the quota is in nits
Ans: Sidarth, With a 93.5 percentile and a KM merit rank of 28, your Maharashtra CAP chances are strong. Maharashtra CET rules treat J&K/Ladakh Migrant candidates separately, and for engineering admissions, a positive JEE Main score is given preference over MHT-CET scores.

You should aggressively fill choices including COEP Pune, VJTI Mumbai, SPIT Mumbai, PICT Pune, DJ Sanghvi, Walchand Sangli, Cummins, PCCOE, VIT Pune, and MIT-WPU. With a KM rank of 28, admission to top colleges is possible. However, CSE/IT in COEP, VJTI, SPIT, or PICT may be uncertain due to limited seats. Branches like ECE, AI-DS, ENTC, or IT in strong colleges are more realistic options. VJTI’s 2024 closing ranks indicate that CSE/IT branches remain highly competitive.

Regarding NITs, there is no general Kashmiri Migrant quota through JoSAA, as admissions follow CRL/category/HS-OS rules. The CSAB supernumerary quota in 2025 applied only to specific UT candidates, not broadly to KM. Nonetheless, it’s advisable to participate in JoSAA and CSAB counseling rounds.

Also, consider having 3-4 backup options to keep your chances secure. All the BEST for Your Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |11191 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Apr 28, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 28, 2026Hindi
Career
My daughter has got 93.91in jee 2026 with rank 95015 in general category and home state as delhi .please tell what are her chances of getting admission and branch in igdtu ,thapar and lnmit.Do IPU colleges in delhi hav good placements.please suggest some other good colleges for cse and related branches and ece
Ans: Based on your daughter's score, admission to IGDTUW is possible mainly in later rounds or spot rounds. For example, in 2023 Round-5 Delhi cutoffs (approximate), CSE closed around 58,531, IT at 66,326, AIML at 71,162, ECE at 90,900, and MAE at 1,03,589, making ECE and MAE more realistic options, while CSE and IT would be difficult.

Regarding Thapar Institute, the chances are better. In 2024, later cutoffs for Punjab quota showed Computer Engineering around 92,826 and ECE around 97,890, with some allied branches going much lower. For candidates outside Punjab, core CSE is tougher, but ECE, Electronics, and related branches in lower rounds could be worth applying for.

At LNMIIT, CSE admission is unlikely due to high JEE percentile expectations, but ECE might still be possible.

Consider IPU Delhi as a backup, along with reputable colleges like USICT, MAIT, MSIT, BVCOE, and BPIT, which have decent placement records. For detailed placement data, please check the respective college websites and online resources.

Other backup options to explore include JIIT Noida, Shiv Nadar University, UPES, Manipal Jaipur, Bennett University, and Chandigarh University. All the BEST for Your Daughter's Prosperous Future!

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