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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |623 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 02, 2023

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Hi. Keep me anonymous. I'm in mid 40s. All my life I m a confused guy with regards to everything. Never married. Never had any love affair. I consider speaking to ladies, proposing them, love making as demeaning and bad. But occasionally I feel lonely, driven by natural human desire to love and to be loved. I have always had a desire to marry and and an equal desire to not marry. I however like more of non married life. And never , not even in dreams like making adjustments which may be required in a married life. My way is always Highway. Wt do you suggest or think in this case?? Not that I accept other's suggestions.

Ans: It's perfectly okay to have different desires and preferences when it comes to relationships and marriage. People have diverse perspectives on these matters, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to life. What matters most is that you understand and accept your feelings and choices.

If you feel content and happy with your non-married life and prefer to live independently without making adjustments for a partner, that is entirely valid. Some individuals find fulfillment and satisfaction in singlehood, and that is absolutely fine. Not everyone feels the need to pursue romantic relationships or marriage, and that doesn't make you any less of a person.

However, if you occasionally feel lonely and desire love and companionship, that is also natural. It's okay to have moments of vulnerability and longing for emotional connection. You can explore ways to address these feelings without necessarily committing to a traditional romantic relationship or marriage. For example, you might consider building strong friendships or participating in social activities that allow you to connect with others on a meaningful level.

Ultimately, what matters most is that you embrace and understand yourself and your feelings. If you find contentment and fulfillment in your current lifestyle, there is no need to feel pressured to conform to societal expectations. It's crucial to prioritize your own well-being and happiness, regardless of external opinions or suggestions.

If you ever feel overwhelmed or conflicted about your feelings, talking to a counselor or therapist can be beneficial. They can provide a safe space for you to explore your thoughts and emotions and help you gain clarity about what you truly want in life.

Remember, there is no right or wrong way to approach relationships or marriage. Each person's journey is unique, and the key is to be true to yourself and make choices that align with your values and bring you happiness.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1669 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 30, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Hello, I do follow you from sometime and thought to ask you...NO... share my inner turmoil and get some suggestions.... DON’T KNOW WHAT I WANT ? I am 35 year old, unmarried female, I work in small firm, living a good life with my family. I am happy being single and don't have any thought about getting married sooner. Actually that something strange.... is it ? Sometime I wonder if I am going to regret today's decision of being single ? of not having a family of my own? It scare me sometime.... I always say I won't be regretting it because it’s the best what I can do for myself now BUT... Also, recently one of my relative is pregnant - seeing her and think about the child, I feel connected to babies... So, It also come to mind I won't be able to experience it.... Though I am freaking shit scared of the whole thing... but a new born child of your own... it give such a good feeling. I know I can adopt and will if, but it not an easy thing in India ... the procedure are a lot. Also i am not that financial stable, belong to lower middle class family, unmarried, aged.... One more thing that i found strange about me is.... I am never get attracted toward man or woman (LOL) physically or emotionally.... I don’t feel like my body/ heart/mind need it.... That one big reason I never thought of marriage.... I can't ruin a persons life by getting married to him even after knowing... I will never be able to become his wife completely; RIGHT ? I don't feel any thing about physical relationship... not good not bad. It a big part of married life - some thing that MUST. I also sometime wonder may be with time as duty i will accept it, may be like it..... but that a whole experiment thing... I know my personal space it quite bigger... when I actually start thinking about it i found out i never show love or emotions physically to anyone..... like hugging your parents siblings... giving kiss to kids... patting animals... holding friends hand.... anything I don't do it... So I am sure the experiment is going to fail... I may become a good support but never a good partner. Man are different when it come to physical relation, I have read a lot of your posts, It clearing say - It mean a lot to them So, I found my decision of not getting married correct.... Baby I don’t thing I am at a stage to handle it now... but sure love them... I sound like a hypocrite wanting and not wanting...it's so confusing. Is any thing wrong with me.... I am overly emotional too....i carved care and support... but I am not a lonely person, has a very beautiful happy family. There are no questions just if you can say something in reply.... My thoughts confuse me a lot, your view on it may help me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
How many thoughts do you want to handle at one go?
1. You feel connected to babies but at this stage you can't handle
2. You want to adopt but you worry about procedural difficulties
3. You don't want to get married as you feel that not being attracted will ruin someone's life
4. You don't want a physical relationship
5. Your personal space matters a lot to you
6. You can't show physical affection to anyone
7. You are overly emotional
8. You crave care and support
In all of this, I still want you to think:
- What is it that I actually want?
- What is it that I am actually good at within the family?
- What is it that I am uniquely different when it comes to relationships?
- What can I change to make a marriage/relationship work on a long-term basis?

Your challenge/issue is that you choose to focus on what you don't want and that keep you in a confused state for long. Instead focus on what you want and what can help you get to that place; this can be the beginning of clearing confusions...So, if your thoughts confuse you, then shift focus to better thinking by answering the above questions...it will be a good place to start...

All the best!

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |629 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 07, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi, I am 32 year old male. I have contentment in all major aspects of life such as job, money, friends, family, fun etc. But everytime I try to bring a girl into my life everything just turns in to chaos. There is a lot of pressure from from family, friends and almost everyone that I know for me to get married. But I cannot accept just anyone in my life through matrimony sites or references. I am afraid that the hard work that I have put in all these years to make my life comfortable will be shaken up by marriage. I cannot choose people by their attributes but have to just develop a liking for them. Similarly I have no interest in how a girl looks, what job she does or any material aspects. I am happy with someone who choses me completely and is committed to me. Unfortunately I couldn't find anyone such and I am in the phase of saying no to marriage completely as life is good as it is. I had a girlfriend when I was 25 and she left me after 5 years of relationship because her parents did not accept which I respected. Could connect with anyone else until this year who also left me after an year because her parents will not agree as my parents are not rich enough. I cannot connect with anyone else physically or emotionally. I think it's injustice to the woman I marry if I marry her just for the sake of society. I am completely confused, could you please share your expertise on this. Thanks in advance!
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

It's amazing how you are putting other people's needs over yours. That's very selfless of you. If you don't feel you are ready to commit, there is no rush; no matter what people say. I understand that societal pressure can be very tough, but as you said, being in an incompatible relationship will be tougher on both you and the woman. All I can say here is wait. You are content with your life, and that is more than most people have. Focus on that. Make it even better. If and when the time is right, you will meet someone, and things will fall into place. It might sound cliche, but trust me, this is the best thing to do. Again, I repeat, do not give in to peer pressure. No good things can come out of it.

Best Wishes.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1669 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 07, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 07, 2024
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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9967 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 06, 2025

Career
Mathematics and computing ( MnC ) engeneering is how will b d future
Ans: Mathematics and Computing (MnC) engineering is emerging as one of the most dynamic and sought-after interdisciplinary fields at the intersection of advanced mathematics, statistics, and computer science. The core curriculum encompasses applied mathematics, machine learning, artificial intelligence, cryptography, data analytics, computational modeling, software development, and statistical inference, preparing graduates for highly analytical and technical roles across diverse sectors. Industries such as technology, finance, research, healthcare, government, and defense are increasingly reliant on professionals who can bridge raw data with mathematical reasoning to solve complex, real-world problems. As digital transformation accelerates across industries and domains, the demand for mathematics and computing professionals is projected to grow rapidly, with jobs for mathematicians and statisticians expected to surge by over 30% between 2021 and 2031—significantly outpacing other engineering disciplines.

Graduates of MnC are uniquely equipped for roles that require both advanced quantitative skills and computational expertise—including data scientist, AI/machine learning engineer, quantitative analyst, cryptographer, software developer, business intelligence analyst, and research scientist. The versatility of the degree enables opportunities across technology giants, global financial institutions, government research labs, healthcare analytics, fintech, and climatology, as well as opening doors to cutting-edge R&D or higher academia. The rapidly growing areas of artificial intelligence, cybersecurity, fintech, quantum computing, and big data analytics particularly value the hybrid skill set of MnC graduates, often offering career prospects and placement rates on par with, and sometimes surpassing, traditional computer science engineers at leading institutes. Additionally, the course involves fewer hardware labs than other technical branches, allowing students to focus on algorithmic thinking, theory, and practical coding—a major positive for those passionate about the analytical side of computing.

Across highly reputed institutes such as IITs, BITS, and IISc, MnC programs are supported by highly qualified faculty, strong research ecosystems, international collaborations, and top-tier campus infrastructure. Placement records regularly exceed 90–95% for MnC, with leading firms and startups actively recruiting for specialized technical and research roles. However, student reviews indicate that successfully leveraging the branch often requires proactive learning beyond the curriculum, including hands-on coding projects, internships, and continuous skill upgrades. While the branch suits those who enjoy deep theoretical work, mathematical abstraction, and problem-solving, it may not appeal to students seeking highly application-oriented or hardware-centric engineering careers.

Recommendation: Mathematics and Computing is an outstanding branch for students who are analytically inclined and aspire to excel in computational theory, data science, AI, or quantitative domains. Its strong industry demand, future-proof scope, and cross-sector versatility ensure excellent placement and long-term career growth, provided students commit to independent learning and continuous upskilling. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9967 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 06, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 05, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir please reply srm ktr vs vit vellore vs manipal
Ans: Which Branch? Anyway, please note, SRM Institute of Science and Technology (Kattankulathur), VIT Vellore, and Manipal Institute of Technology each deliver leading-edge infrastructure, advanced research facilities, strong faculty, and extensive industry-academia collaborations. SRM KTR, with NAAC A++ accreditation and a sprawling campus, recorded 9,040 job offers and 65LPA top package for 2025, with an average of around 6.6LPA and over 1,200 companies including Microsoft, Amazon, and PayPal participating; its placement rate remains strong, though slightly lower than its peers. VIT Vellore stands out for its rigorous academics, modern labs, and 99.2% placement rate in 2025, with 632 recruiters—such as Amazon, Google, Microsoft, and TCS—delivering 10,027 placements, a record 1.02 crore highest package in CSE, and a median salary of 9LPA. It consistently ranks among the top private colleges and is known for its global exposure, innovation ecosystem, and highly active student life. Manipal Institute of Technology matches with premier on-campus infrastructure, a renowned faculty, industry integration, and a vibrant residential campus. In 2025, it achieved a 77.4% placement rate with over 287 recruiters and an average salary of 12.31LPA, securing jobs for students in firms including Microsoft, Boeing, SAP Labs, and Oracle, and maintaining a robust alumni network. MIT shows particular strength in all-around student development, international collaboration, and a supportive placement cell. Each institution offers excellent campus amenities, advanced learning resources, holistic student support, and strong academic environments, but there are marked differences in placement statistics, recruiter profiles, and campus living experience that may influence priorities.

Recommendation: Choose VIT Vellore for its highest placement rate, industry reputation, median package, and broad recruiter base, particularly for tech-focused careers. Follow with Manipal Institute of Technology for a premium academic and campus life experience, stellar average salary, and strong alumni network. SRM KTR remains a valuable choice for students seeking diverse placement opportunities and modern infrastructure in Chennai’s tech hub. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9967 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 06, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 05, 2025Hindi
Career
I have been allotted electronics and instrumentation engineering in sjce Mysore in my first round... I may have chances of upgrading it to ramaiah eie and may get bmsit ece also... If I don't get ramaiah eie, is sjce eie better or bmsit ece better?
Ans: SJCE Mysore’s Electronics and Instrumentation Engineering (EIE) is recognized for its robust infrastructure, accredited government status, 70–80% placement rates, and consistently positive student feedback regarding campus life and faculty support. The department facilitated 56 job offers in 2024, with recruiters like Bosch, TCS, Tech Mahindra, and Titan, complemented by well-equipped labs, research facilities, and modern hostels. BMSIT’s ECE program records a 56.4% placement rate in 2024, slightly lower than SJCE’s EIE, but boasts an average salary of ?8.07LPA and over 200 visiting recruiters, with top offers up to ?46.4LPA. BMSIT provides strong digital infrastructure, high-speed campus Wi-Fi, diverse industry tie-ups, and an active placement and training cell, though its placement rate for ECE is comparatively modest. Both colleges ensure rigorous academic environments, quality faculty, and vibrant student communities, but SJCE’s government-backed status and consistent placement record edge it ahead for EIE.

Recommendation: If you do not secure Ramaiah EIE, prioritize SJCE Mysore EIE for its government reputation, higher placement rates, and established industry links. BMSIT ECE remains a strong alternative for those focused on Bangalore’s tech proximity, but SJCE offers superior stability, campus experience, and placement assurance. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9967 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 06, 2025

Career
Sir my daughter has got cs with ai in g.l bajaj noida but she want to take kiet ghaziabad cs with it which is best for her
Ans: Yogita Madam,



GL Bajaj Noida’s Computer Science (CS) with Artificial Intelligence delivers a robust, industry-oriented curriculum focused on advanced topics such as data modelling, predictive analytics, and machine learning, supported by modern labs, A+ NAAC accreditation, and consistent 70–80% placement rates with top offers from companies like Deloitte, Wipro, Infosys, and TCS. The institute features a fully air-conditioned campus, extensive library, state-of-the-art labs, and comprehensive hostel and sports facilities, ensuring a strong academic and campus experience. KIET Ghaziabad’s CS with IT program is equally recognized, boasting A+ NAAC accreditation, a placement rate above 77%, 300+ recruiters including Microsoft, Deloitte, TCS, and Accenture, and modern infrastructure comprising a central digital library, large multi-purpose hostels, dedicated computer labs, high-speed Wi-Fi, and vibrant student life. Both institutions maintain strong faculty teams, active industry tie-ups, and relevant research opportunities; however, KIET’s slightly higher reviewer satisfaction, broader alumni and recruiter network, and larger academic ecosystem position it at a premium within the Delhi NCR region.

Recommendation: KIET Ghaziabad CS with IT is preferred for its higher placement consistency, more extensive recruiter base, vibrant campus ecosystem, and greater overall academic and industry reach. GL Bajaj Noida CS with AI remains a strong alternative for students passionate about artificial intelligence and seeking quality infrastructure and focused specialization. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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