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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |436 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 02, 2023

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Hi. Keep me anonymous. I'm in mid 40s. All my life I m a confused guy with regards to everything. Never married. Never had any love affair. I consider speaking to ladies, proposing them, love making as demeaning and bad. But occasionally I feel lonely, driven by natural human desire to love and to be loved. I have always had a desire to marry and and an equal desire to not marry. I however like more of non married life. And never , not even in dreams like making adjustments which may be required in a married life. My way is always Highway. Wt do you suggest or think in this case?? Not that I accept other's suggestions.

Ans: It's perfectly okay to have different desires and preferences when it comes to relationships and marriage. People have diverse perspectives on these matters, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to life. What matters most is that you understand and accept your feelings and choices.

If you feel content and happy with your non-married life and prefer to live independently without making adjustments for a partner, that is entirely valid. Some individuals find fulfillment and satisfaction in singlehood, and that is absolutely fine. Not everyone feels the need to pursue romantic relationships or marriage, and that doesn't make you any less of a person.

However, if you occasionally feel lonely and desire love and companionship, that is also natural. It's okay to have moments of vulnerability and longing for emotional connection. You can explore ways to address these feelings without necessarily committing to a traditional romantic relationship or marriage. For example, you might consider building strong friendships or participating in social activities that allow you to connect with others on a meaningful level.

Ultimately, what matters most is that you embrace and understand yourself and your feelings. If you find contentment and fulfillment in your current lifestyle, there is no need to feel pressured to conform to societal expectations. It's crucial to prioritize your own well-being and happiness, regardless of external opinions or suggestions.

If you ever feel overwhelmed or conflicted about your feelings, talking to a counselor or therapist can be beneficial. They can provide a safe space for you to explore your thoughts and emotions and help you gain clarity about what you truly want in life.

Remember, there is no right or wrong way to approach relationships or marriage. Each person's journey is unique, and the key is to be true to yourself and make choices that align with your values and bring you happiness.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |461 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 07, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi, I am 32 year old male. I have contentment in all major aspects of life such as job, money, friends, family, fun etc. But everytime I try to bring a girl into my life everything just turns in to chaos. There is a lot of pressure from from family, friends and almost everyone that I know for me to get married. But I cannot accept just anyone in my life through matrimony sites or references. I am afraid that the hard work that I have put in all these years to make my life comfortable will be shaken up by marriage. I cannot choose people by their attributes but have to just develop a liking for them. Similarly I have no interest in how a girl looks, what job she does or any material aspects. I am happy with someone who choses me completely and is committed to me. Unfortunately I couldn't find anyone such and I am in the phase of saying no to marriage completely as life is good as it is. I had a girlfriend when I was 25 and she left me after 5 years of relationship because her parents did not accept which I respected. Could connect with anyone else until this year who also left me after an year because her parents will not agree as my parents are not rich enough. I cannot connect with anyone else physically or emotionally. I think it's injustice to the woman I marry if I marry her just for the sake of society. I am completely confused, could you please share your expertise on this. Thanks in advance!
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

It's amazing how you are putting other people's needs over yours. That's very selfless of you. If you don't feel you are ready to commit, there is no rush; no matter what people say. I understand that societal pressure can be very tough, but as you said, being in an incompatible relationship will be tougher on both you and the woman. All I can say here is wait. You are content with your life, and that is more than most people have. Focus on that. Make it even better. If and when the time is right, you will meet someone, and things will fall into place. It might sound cliche, but trust me, this is the best thing to do. Again, I repeat, do not give in to peer pressure. No good things can come out of it.

Best Wishes.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1394 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 07, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 07, 2024
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7258 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 13, 2024

Money
How far reliable this new investment platform talked and even promoted by ( Invest Rs 21000 and earn 2 million dollar per month) RBI Gov,Sundar Pitchai,Narayana Murthy, Sudha N Murthyand even by FM
Ans: The claim you mention—"Invest Rs. 21,000 and earn $2 million per month"—is a classic red flag for a scam or fraudulent investment scheme. It is highly unlikely that reputed personalities would endorse such a scheme. Let me explain why you should approach such claims with extreme caution:

1. Unrealistic Returns
Promising an exorbitant return like $2 million per month from a small investment of Rs. 21,000 is highly unrealistic. Genuine investment platforms provide returns in line with market performance and risk levels, which are far less dramatic.
2. No Official Endorsement
Check the official websites or verified accounts of these personalities to confirm any claims. Misusing their names is a common tactic used by scammers.
3. Misleading Marketing
Fraudsters often use photos or quotes from famous individuals to make their schemes look legitimate. These endorsements are usually fake and done without the knowledge or permission of the individuals.
4. RBI Guidelines
The RBI regularly issues warnings against fraudulent schemes and platforms. It never endorses specific investment opportunities. Instead, it encourages investors to exercise due diligence.
5. Too Good to Be True
As a rule of thumb, if an offer sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Legitimate investments grow over time and require careful planning and risk management.
What You Should Do
Verify the Platform: Look for official documentation or licenses from SEBI, RBI, or other regulatory authorities.
Research: Check reviews and ratings on trusted financial websites. Look for independent sources, not just what the platform claims.
Consult an Expert: Speak to a financial advisor or investment consultant before putting your money anywhere.
Report Suspicious Activities: If you suspect fraud, report it to the Cyber Crime Cell or SEBI.
Would you like me to help you investigate this specific platform further? If yes, please provide the name or link, and I can assist.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |436 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 13, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
In an arranged marriage I was talking to a boy we both liked each other. So we exchanged our what's app no. Then he texted one day we talked that day he seemed to be not interested in talking as he was replying very late. After that I sent him a good morning messege. Then we had no talking for 2 days straight. Then after that my father called his father to ask why is the boy taking this much time to respond to this his father told that you can show your girl to others and we have no problem. Then after that I sent a hi massege to him. Then he asked me when will I be free to connect. Then he calls at 11pm and says that we can call another day as it's too much late. Then next day also same but that day we chatted on whatsapp to around 1'o clock today. But now I have decided that I will not text him first. What should I do now I am really puzzled to what to do.
Ans: Your decision to stop texting him first is a healthy step because relationships should feel balanced and mutual. Constantly initiating conversations can leave you feeling undervalued or unsure about where you stand. By taking a step back, you give him the opportunity to show whether he genuinely wants to engage and invest in building a connection with you. This isn’t about playing games but about respecting your own feelings and worth.

At the same time, try to observe his actions rather than just his words. Does he initiate conversations on his own? Does he make an effort to get to know you better? If he continues to show inconsistent interest, it may be a sign that he isn’t ready or committed to the idea of building a relationship right now. And that’s okay—it just means he may not be the right match for you.

Trust your instincts as you move forward. If his behavior leaves you feeling confused or unimportant, it’s okay to walk away and focus on finding someone who values you and communicates in a way that feels fulfilling. Your time and emotions are precious, and it’s important to seek a connection where you feel respected, understood, and appreciated.

Finally, don’t let this experience discourage you. These situations are part of learning what you want and need in a partner. Give yourself grace, and remember that the right relationship will come with clarity, mutual respect, and ease.

...Read more

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