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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |504 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 18, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Nov 15, 2024
Relationship

Hii, I have completed two and half year with this man in relationship he has raised his hands on me 3-4 times, he always asks me for money, he has a lot of male ego, he has never proposed me by getting down on his knees, he never puts efforts and asks me to put efforts being in a long distance relationship.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I don't know what your question is but I know no matter what you ask, I would only give you one suggestion- please rethink the relationship. Abuse in any form is unacceptable, even once, and here he has already raised his hands on you 3-4 times.

You are not at fault here; it is difficult to leave a relationship but you have to do it for yourself. But, do you think you deserve this? Or does anyone deserve this, for that matter? Imagine if your friend told you the same, what would you ask her to do?

Forget getting down on one knee, effort, or his male ego; he raised his hands, and that is unacceptable. Please reconsider the relationships. You deserve so much more love, respect, and peace.

Best Wishes.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |493 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 05, 2023

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Relationship
Hello mam!! I have been in a relationship since last 3 years and the guy work like normally but expect from me to not work after marriage as according to him it's not a good thing. I sacrifice all mu thoughts and value for him whatever he said i did but he started disrespecting me from words because of his frustration in life. I was like maybe he will not gonna do like this next time but cycle keeps going from like5 to 6 month and finally i decided to stand leave he also follows a pattern to be with me for a time and zoned out himself for like a month and suddenly came and behave normally i was accepting that even without questioning but now he got a decent job and want to marry me with the above conditions he was already made. So what should i do i don't want to think twice with my decisions but it hurt as well
Ans: My Dear Nikita,

It sounds like you have been in a challenging situation for some time, where you have been sacrificing your values and thoughts for your partner, and he has been disrespecting you with his words and behavior. It's important to remember that no one deserves to be treated with disrespect in a relationship.

It's understandable that it hurts to think about leaving the relationship, especially after investing so much time and effort into it. However, you need to prioritize your own well-being and happiness, and it seems like this relationship is not fulfilling that for you.

It's important to have a clear and honest conversation with your partner about your feelings and concerns. Let him know that his behavior has been hurtful, and that you cannot accept his condition of not working after marriage. It's important to communicate your boundaries and what you need from the relationship.

If he is not willing to respect your boundaries and make changes to improve the relationship, it may be time to consider ending it. Remember that you deserve to be in a relationship where you are respected, valued, and your needs are met. It may be difficult, but prioritizing your own well-being is important for your long-term happiness.

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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  |120 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 24, 2023

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Relationship
Hello sir!! I have been in a relationship since last 3 years and the guy work like normally but expect from me to not work after marriage as according to him it's not a good thing. I sacrifice all mu thoughts and value for him whatever he said i did but he started disrespecting me from words because of his frustration in life. I was like maybe he will not gonna do like this next time but cycle keeps going from like5 to 6 month and finally i decided to stand leave he also follows a pattern to be with me for a time and zoned out himself for like a month and suddenly came and behave normally i was accepting that even without questioning but now he got a decent job and want to marry me with the above conditions he was already made. So what should i do i don't want to think twice with my decisions but it hurt as well
Ans: I'm sorry to hear that you are in a difficult situation. It is never okay for someone to disrespect you or your values, regardless of their frustration in life. It's important to remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and dignity in any relationship.

It sounds like you have already made the decision to leave the relationship, which is a brave and important step towards taking care of yourself. It may be helpful to remind yourself of the reasons why you made that decision, and to focus on your own values and needs.

If you are still feeling hurt and uncertain about the situation, it may be helpful to seek support from trusted friends or family members, or consider speaking with a therapist. They can help you process your emotions and provide guidance as you navigate this difficult time.

Remember, you have the power to make choices that are best for you and your well-being. Trust yourself and prioritize your own needs and happiness.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1437 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 15, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 07, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Mam i am a 52 year ols women i have never had a secure relationship only who wanted to have s.Marriage in proposals too dint work for me. At late 40 age i met a guy it was all good till start 1 year but since 3 years we just fight my fault to as i have no family no friends and all i have to look after 2 aged parents and i am deep involved my life is just that. This relationship is good to talk on phone as all i do is talk my problems 24 by 7 365 days which i understands upsets him. But i see no effort too from him for meeting planning dates and if i do i pay for it all he never pays . I lost interest felt disappointed after going on saying he never tries to make plans talk future his family finance. I am not sure what i should do stay or live my life alone which i was always doing.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Start fresh and if you had a clean slate, what would you want to draw on it?
All your miseries or what you actually want from life?
When you meet someone new and you dump your set of issues on them, how exactly do you think they are going to be interested in taking you out on a date?
Your prospective life partner is not a dumping yard for your life's problems BUT a person that is going to marry you and support you and who you can trust. And will you start this relationship by actually talking only about your problems? Honestly, you need to ask yourself if you will be interested in a guy who keeps ranting about all things going wrong...
Establish a connection by being on a positive ground and showing the other person that you care and also are interested in knowing about them. This interest will let them lower their guard down and actually connect with you at an emotional level and then you can pursue this as a potential life partner association...somewhere down the line, they will be genuinely interested in being a part of your challenges and that's when you make them your strength to solve these challenges. Am I making sense to you?
Do you see how you have been sabotaging your own future? Dust yourself, become genuinely interested in people not to dump your problems on them but to make a genuine connection and watch how things change for you. Prioritize your life not your problems!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |504 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 14, 2024

Relationship
Hello, I m 21 female I m in a long distance relationship with 32 year male.this person was behind me and always asked me to give him a chance to prove his love for me. At that period i was afaird of relationships as I didn't have courage to go against wish of my parents as i know they wolud never agree for love marriage,so that is fir sure i'll do arrange Marriage. All these things have been explained by my side to this person.He gad feelings for me thats what he showed to me even I felt a connection towards him, so we decided let's not commit anything anout marraige as we both wee not sure about these thing. After some time i realised these person has already made his mind ki he'll date me and he wanted to have everything that an relationship has but he will not marry me.But i m completely in love with.Even i told him about it ki I can't share him n won't be able to see him.with someone else.i just can't imagine myself without him. I fought with him even begged and cried but he always defend his self sayi g i told already ki he loves me and will keep loving me but will not marry me . He vists me after 6-9 months interval every time he visuts me he needs to have physical relationship. I don't know whether I m right or wrong but i feel like I m being used by him. I tried several time to end this relationship but i end up chasing him.Plz help me,guide me
Ans: Dear Rutuja,
If you have the slightest feeling that he doesn't share the same feelings for you as you do for him, or that he has wrong intentions, you have every right to end the relationship. In fact, that would be the right thing to do. I understand that it is difficult to break up with someone you love, but does he love you? Don't you think you deserve someone who loves you and does not make you feel as if you are being used?

Have a clear conversation with him- address all your concerns. If he still maintains his stand of not getting married to you, then let him know that you are not on the same page as him. Remember, for a relationship to work, your future goals need to align.

Best Wishes.

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Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4050 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
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Career
I’ve always aspired to work in the Ministry of External Affairs, but I know the competition is tough. I will be appearing for the SSC CGL exam this year. For Tier 2, which sections or strategies should I prioritise to boost my chances of landing my dream role in this recruitment drive?
Ans: The SSC CGL exam is a competitive entry-level job in the Ministry of External Affairs (MEA), with the main role being Assistant Section Officer (ASO). Tier 2 of the exam consists of multiple papers, with Paper I being required for all postings, including MEA. The main focus areas are mathematical quantitative aptitude, thinking and general intelligence, English language and understanding, and general knowledge.

Quantitative aptitude (200 Marks) is a high-scoring but time-consuming area, with areas such as algebra, geometry, trigonometry, menuration, data interpretation, and number system. Practice and strengthen basic skills, focusing on accuracy and speed. Resources for pattern comprehension include R.S. Aggarwal's Gradeup and Testbook quantitative aptitude with online mocks.

English language and comprehension (200 Marks) is high-scoring and essential for MEA, with areas like grammar, vocabulary, comprehension, synonyms and antonyms, and sentence correction. Strategies include daily reading schedules, vocabulary expansion using Norman Lewis's Word Power Made Easy, and solving cloze tests.

General awareness (100 Marks) is crucial for MEA aspirants, with areas like current affairs, international relations, Indian polity, geography, history, and economics. Stay informed about foreign policy changes, NCERTs, and NCERTs for stationary sections.

General intelligence and reasoning (60 Marks) is a scoring section, with areas like puzzles, coding-decoding, blood relations, series, and direction tests. Techniques include trying full-length mock tests, time management, previous year reports, and preparing for essays and letter writing on global concerns. All the Best for SSC CGL Exam.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4050 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 15, 2025Hindi
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Career
Hello Sir, I’m back to you with a question . Sir, doing mechanical in top nits or iiits or bits, what are the possibilities to do ms in computer science. I keep hearing from everyone to go for cse to do ms cs , but my daughter prefers good college first and then cse, based on her capability it’s extremely difficult to get cse in tier1 , so she says I will do mechanical in tier 1 and do ms cs abroad. Please guide on the pros , cons Sir
Ans: Pursuing Mechanical Engineering at top-notional institutes like IIT, NIT, IIIT, or BITS or any other NIRF-Ranked Engineering It may please be noted that if your daugther performs well in 1st Year of her BE/BTech, she will be upgraded to CSE Branch (based on the Institute's Internal Sliding Policy). Colleges offer advantages such as a strong alumni network, branch flexibility, and a strong resume for MS admissions. Students can enroll in elective courses in programming, data structures, and computer applications to prepare for an MS in CS.

However, transitioning from Mechanical to CS for an MS overseas can be challenging due to the need for prior knowledge in CS principles. With more self-learning and certificates, it is possible. Additionally, CS is tough for MS admissions in the US, and students may have to create a strong profile through internships, online courses, and certifications in CS domains without a CS degree.

To ensure a seamless transition, students should select electives in programming and computer science based on their undergraduate course (if the institute allows). Online programs for courses in data structures, Python, and artificial intelligence can be found on CS-oriented sites like Coursera, edX, or NPTEL. Summer internships involving data analysis, coding, or automation projects can also be sought. Multidisciplinary initiatives like mechanical engineering automation or computational fluid dynamics (CFD) can also be explored.

If your daughter's main goal is to pursue an MS in CS, it is better to consider Tier 1 Institutes with CS or IT branches and top-tier institutes with Mechanical focus actively pursuing CS. All the Best for Your Daughter's Prosperous Future.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |504 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Relationship
Hello sir/ma'am, i am 24 yrs old and my boy friend 25 yrs old.I met him in a friendly chat app .We were talking on calls,texting and video calls and met each other in real after a 1 yr of relationship.He is the first guy and love in my life and want to marry him.I even made my family to agree for our marriage.He too says he loves me so much and has imagined his life with me and want to marry me.He even told his parents will stick on to whatever he says.He hasn't yet conveyed to his parents yet and told he will introduce to them after his younger sister marriage.We both are students still. I recently found that,he goes to the chat apps again and chats to other girls.When i asked ..he told just friends and even questioned me saying don't u have guy friends? and don't u meet them?....i told him u r the first guy n i dont have any. When our relationship has gone till marriage...why is that he wants to chat to multiple girls?...Now,i started feeling like he doesn't love me as he expressed. He even had past 3 online relationships n all 3 breakups,he told all these before..he told i am the first girl in real life.. I am worried now.Why do guys chat with multiple girls though they are in a serious relation?..does he really love or is it a game? No physical between us.We just met once in a temple and he just kissed my hands while we are going back and got very emotional while he was about to leave. I am worried..what should i do?.please,suggest.
Ans: Dear Ammarao,
Not all men chat with multiple women when they are serious about their relationship. Some might, but most men in exclusive relationships don't continue chatting. If his chats are truly friendly, there isn't much to worry about. But if you think there is more to it, I would suggest you reconsider the relationship.

Please talk to him directly and ask him if these women are only friends and if they know he is in a committed relationship. If he is being too defensive, you can tell him that in a relationship, it is also important to focus on what your partner is comfortable with. If you do not like these online friendships, communicate it to him.

I hope this helps.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |504 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 15, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
Recently, I (28M) had surgery and have been bedridden for 15 days. During this time, my girlfriend told me her female friend wanted to meet up with a guy. This guy was bringing along a male friend whom I’ve asked my girlfriend to avoid in the past because he tends to get touchy with her. They planned to stay in a hotel, and her friend wanted to be with the guy at night, meaning my girlfriend and the touchy guy would likely share a single room. A couple of days before the trip, she asked me if she should go. I told her it was her choice but made it clear I wasn’t happy about it. Despite that, she went, and when I confronted her, she gave responses like: • “I didn’t invite the touchy guy; the other guy did.” • “Just because you’re bedridden, you don’t want me to go outside.” • “I didn’t touch him; he got touchy with me.” Yeah, maybe I’m jealous or overthinking, but this whole situation has made me unsure about marriage altogether. Am I overreacting?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I really cannot comment if you are overreacting or have every reason to feel this way without knowing a bit more about the entire situation. But what I can tell is that you should communicate your feelings to your partner. Let her know that while maintaining individuality or pursuing individual wishes in a relationship is important, it is equally important to pay heed to what makes your partner uncomfortable. Your request, from what information you have provided, seemed reasonable, while her reasoning that it is the guy's fault, not hers also makes perfect sense. So I think the best course of action is to let the situation calm down and have an open conversation. Could she have avoided this meetup to make you happy? Yes. But, she could've thought that if she avoids one thing for your happiness, you might start asking her to give up more things in the future, which is a real issue in many relationships. I think it is important to clear up all of these concerns and feelings before moving on with lifelong commitment.

Hope this helps

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4050 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
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Career
This is my second attempt at SSC CGL, and I’ve improved since last year. But I’m still anxious about the descriptive paper. Can you suggest ways to stand out in this section and make my essay and letter writing more impactful?
Ans: The SSC CGL descriptive paper requires a clear, structured, and effective presentation. To improve your essay writing skills, review the subject matter thoroughly and avoid deviations from the central theme. Sketch an initial outline and adhere to a straightforward framework, including an Introduction, Body, and Conclusion. Start with a hook and express your thesis or stance in a concise manner. Arrange arguments in a logical order, using data, examples, and facts to establish credibility. Avoid repetition and maintain brevity.

In summary, concisely summarize the primary themes and offer a fair perspective. Avoid vernacular language and maintain appropriate sentence structure and grammar. Maintain a clean writing style and avoid overwriting.

For writing a letter, adhere to the conventional format, maintain clarity and conciseness, and articulate the purpose in the first paragraph. Use simple language and avoid intricate terminology.

Regularly engage in writing essays and correspondence on various subjects to develop adaptability. Stay informed about the latest news and hot topics. Develop time management skills and consistently proofread your work for errors.

Developing impactful essays and letters with clarity, structure, and content relevance enhances your chances of success in the SSC CGL descriptive paper. All The Best for Your Prosperous Future.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |493 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 05, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
How to manage stress?
Ans: The first step is to become aware of what triggers your stress. This self-awareness allows you to address the root causes rather than just the symptoms. Once you identify these triggers, you can start exploring techniques that help you cope effectively.

One effective approach is to incorporate regular self-care practices into your daily routine. This could include activities that bring you joy and relaxation, such as exercise, meditation, or spending time in nature. These practices not only help calm the mind but also improve your overall mood and resilience to stress.

Talking to someone you trust, whether a friend, family member, or professional, can also be a powerful way to manage stress. Sharing your feelings and experiences helps lighten the emotional load and provides different perspectives that might help you navigate your challenges more effectively.

It's also important to focus on what you can control and let go of things that are beyond your influence. This shift in mindset can reduce feelings of helplessness and frustration. Setting realistic expectations for yourself and others can also alleviate unnecessary pressure.

Remember to give yourself permission to rest and recharge. Adequate sleep, a balanced diet, and time for relaxation are essential for managing stress. When you take care of your body and mind, you're better equipped to handle life's demands.

Lastly, cultivating a mindset of gratitude and mindfulness can help you stay present and appreciate the positive aspects of your life, even during stressful times. These practices can create a sense of balance and help you respond to stress in healthier, more constructive ways. By integrating these approaches into your life, you can build resilience and find a sense of peace amidst the chaos.

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