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Ravi Mittal  |260 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 20, 2024

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Samrat Question by Samrat on May 20, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hello . I am Samrat and in past I have asked many questions. Recently I have gone through a lot of infidelity cases. The one thing that crosses my mind is that ", Are those people who cheat in their relationship have some common personality traits " , not everyone but most of them ? Because I used to think that anyone can cheat based on circumstances and no one should judge earlier whether one is cheater or not and neither all the cheater are necessarily bad persons. But the more I am delving into it the more I am getting a feeling that these are specific kind of person not all but most of them like they basically withdraw themselves from relationship no what his/her partner is doing for them. they are mostly self-centred etc. because if any reason can support their argument about cheating it should be apply to everyone. But as we all know both male and suffer but don't get indulge into such kind of activities. I request please respond Hope you're fine Regards Samrat

Ans: Hello Samrat,

That's an interesting take and thanks for sharing your thoughts. Infidelity is very complex and though inexcusable, there are certain circumstances when people are forced to make choices that they would not normally. For instance, couples in unhappy marriages are often seen cheating on their partners. Even though it's unethical, we don't have a clear idea of what pushed them to make such a decision. Having said that, I agree that you might be onto something- in fact, research shows that there are, at certain times, some common attributes in people who tend to cheat. Narcissism, commitment issues, impulsivity, and the like are often observed among people who indulge in infidelity.

But even though these traits might be common among some individuals, it does not apply to all. Situational factors should be weighed in before evaluating.

I hope this helps.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1054 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 16, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 22, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Respected Ma'am/sir I know it may sound biased . But I am asking what I am seeing around me. I am having a clear feeling that women nowadays are , not only gen z but previous one too, not trustable any more. Even on this website I can see more questions about wife/gf infidelity than men . most of my friends around 90% have been cheated by their gf and it has made them and of course me hating women. And it is not only happening in metropolitan but also in small towns and villages . I am overthinking about this issue and it taking heavy toll in my mind . my brother is going to marry next year but I am even doubting his to be wife , maybe she is talking to some other guy. That is why my relationship with her is not good and confined only to formal . The main concern is that I am very stressful about thinking the future of me and my brother that it may happens with us anytime . It has also grown to such extent that I have even started hating my first and only love. Every time I see a woman or girl my mind suggest me the word cheater or potential cheater. I don't know how to tackle this situation or move foreward. Please help !
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You are right from your point of view as that is what you are seeing around you...and what we see is what we believe...
But also remember, there are other points of view which you have started to ignore as your belief has grown stronger by the day!

Are all women cheaters?
Are all the women that are connected to you, cheaters?
Can a few women actually be loyal?

Universal statements like the one you make: "Every time I see a woman or girl my mind suggest me the word cheater or potential cheater." - This will only limit your view of the world and hence limit your experiences and joys of the world.

Let me give you an example for further understanding...
Your friend gets bitten by a stray dog. Your friend will declare: All dogs are bad. They all bite...If you are someone who loves dogs, will you believe this statement? No, right?
Another example:
While boiling milk one day, it curdles...will you declare that Milk is always bad...Is it true?

Kindly open your mind and understand that what you feed your mind with magnifies and makes it true...So, if you want a different view on women, you also need to know that there are two sides to a coin...People are different from one another...Women are all different from one another and there's goodness in each of them that I wish to see...
Doesn't this change your view of the world? If it still doesn't, then you will continue to worry about what's going to happen to your brother or you...Time to change your mindset?

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1054 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 02, 2024

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