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Ravi Mittal  |505 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 20, 2024

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Samrat Question by Samrat on May 20, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hello . I am Samrat and in past I have asked many questions. Recently I have gone through a lot of infidelity cases. The one thing that crosses my mind is that ", Are those people who cheat in their relationship have some common personality traits " , not everyone but most of them ? Because I used to think that anyone can cheat based on circumstances and no one should judge earlier whether one is cheater or not and neither all the cheater are necessarily bad persons. But the more I am delving into it the more I am getting a feeling that these are specific kind of person not all but most of them like they basically withdraw themselves from relationship no what his/her partner is doing for them. they are mostly self-centred etc. because if any reason can support their argument about cheating it should be apply to everyone. But as we all know both male and suffer but don't get indulge into such kind of activities. I request please respond Hope you're fine Regards Samrat

Ans: Hello Samrat,

That's an interesting take and thanks for sharing your thoughts. Infidelity is very complex and though inexcusable, there are certain circumstances when people are forced to make choices that they would not normally. For instance, couples in unhappy marriages are often seen cheating on their partners. Even though it's unethical, we don't have a clear idea of what pushed them to make such a decision. Having said that, I agree that you might be onto something- in fact, research shows that there are, at certain times, some common attributes in people who tend to cheat. Narcissism, commitment issues, impulsivity, and the like are often observed among people who indulge in infidelity.

But even though these traits might be common among some individuals, it does not apply to all. Situational factors should be weighed in before evaluating.

I hope this helps.

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 16, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 22, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Respected Ma'am/sir I know it may sound biased . But I am asking what I am seeing around me. I am having a clear feeling that women nowadays are , not only gen z but previous one too, not trustable any more. Even on this website I can see more questions about wife/gf infidelity than men . most of my friends around 90% have been cheated by their gf and it has made them and of course me hating women. And it is not only happening in metropolitan but also in small towns and villages . I am overthinking about this issue and it taking heavy toll in my mind . my brother is going to marry next year but I am even doubting his to be wife , maybe she is talking to some other guy. That is why my relationship with her is not good and confined only to formal . The main concern is that I am very stressful about thinking the future of me and my brother that it may happens with us anytime . It has also grown to such extent that I have even started hating my first and only love. Every time I see a woman or girl my mind suggest me the word cheater or potential cheater. I don't know how to tackle this situation or move foreward. Please help !
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You are right from your point of view as that is what you are seeing around you...and what we see is what we believe...
But also remember, there are other points of view which you have started to ignore as your belief has grown stronger by the day!

Are all women cheaters?
Are all the women that are connected to you, cheaters?
Can a few women actually be loyal?

Universal statements like the one you make: "Every time I see a woman or girl my mind suggest me the word cheater or potential cheater." - This will only limit your view of the world and hence limit your experiences and joys of the world.

Let me give you an example for further understanding...
Your friend gets bitten by a stray dog. Your friend will declare: All dogs are bad. They all bite...If you are someone who loves dogs, will you believe this statement? No, right?
Another example:
While boiling milk one day, it curdles...will you declare that Milk is always bad...Is it true?

Kindly open your mind and understand that what you feed your mind with magnifies and makes it true...So, if you want a different view on women, you also need to know that there are two sides to a coin...People are different from one another...Women are all different from one another and there's goodness in each of them that I wish to see...
Doesn't this change your view of the world? If it still doesn't, then you will continue to worry about what's going to happen to your brother or you...Time to change your mindset?

All the best!

..Read more

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Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7548 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jan 17, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 17, 2025Hindi
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Money
I'm 35 years old. I want to invest INR 65000 for retirement at 50 years old. My current expenses 65000 per month. Please guide me.
Ans: Retiring at 50 with your current lifestyle requires a carefully crafted investment strategy. Here’s a detailed guide tailored to your goal.

Step 1: Define Retirement Corpus Requirement
Current Monthly Expenses: Rs. 65,000.
Inflation Adjustment: At 6% inflation, your expenses will increase significantly by 50.
Retirement Corpus: The corpus must sustain you for at least 30+ years post-retirement.
Lifestyle Goals: Include travel, medical emergencies, and aspirational expenses in calculations.
Step 2: Asset Allocation Strategy
A balanced mix of equity and debt instruments can help grow your wealth steadily while minimizing risks.

1. Equity Mutual Funds (70% Allocation)
Why Equity? High growth potential to beat inflation over the long term.
Recommended Categories: Flexi-cap, mid-cap, and large-cap funds.
SIP/Investable Amount: Invest Rs. 45,500 monthly in equity mutual funds.
2. Debt Instruments (30% Allocation)
Why Debt? Stability and regular income during volatile markets.
Recommended Options: PPF, short-term debt mutual funds, or NPS (Tier I).
SIP/Investable Amount: Allocate Rs. 19,500 monthly.
Step 3: Include Inflation Protection
Inflation reduces the value of money significantly over time.
Your retirement corpus should grow faster than the inflation rate.
Equity exposure helps overcome inflation impacts effectively.
Step 4: Ensure Tax Efficiency
1. Equity Mutual Funds
Tax Rules: Long-term capital gains (LTCG) above Rs. 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%.
Action Plan: Use annual redemption to manage gains below taxable limits.
2. PPF and NPS
Tax Benefits: Both offer tax-saving benefits under Section 80C.
Lock-in Period: Ensure alignment with your retirement timeline.
Step 5: Emergency Fund Creation
Build an emergency fund equivalent to 12 months’ expenses (Rs. 7.8 lakh).
Park it in liquid funds or a high-yield savings account for quick access.
Step 6: Health and Risk Coverage
Health Insurance: Ensure adequate coverage to avoid depleting investments during medical emergencies.
Life Insurance: Use a term plan to secure your dependents until you achieve your retirement goal.
Step 7: Regular Portfolio Reviews
Review your portfolio every six months.
Rebalance based on performance, changing goals, and market conditions.
Seek advice from a Certified Financial Planner for optimized asset allocation.
Step 8: Additional Recommendations
Avoid Real Estate: Illiquid and high transaction costs make it unsuitable for your timeline.
Avoid Direct Investments: Opt for regular plans via mutual fund distributors guided by a CFP.
Diversify Investments: Explore international mutual funds for added growth.
Step 9: Incremental Contributions
Increase your SIP amount annually by 10-15% to align with income growth.
This ensures your corpus grows significantly over time.
Finally
Achieving financial independence by 50 is ambitious but achievable. Consistency in investments, inflation-adjusted growth, and regular reviews are critical. Focus on disciplined execution of the outlined plan for a secure and fulfilling retirement.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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