Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |644 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 11, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Nov 10, 2024
Relationship

Hello mam I have met one guy on social media and talked with him for few months first its was ok but after video call he blocked me then again after few months he msg me saying that he was angry because i was not going to hotel to have sex as he only want sex not relationship then again after 15 days he blocked me then again he unblocked me on sep and it was all set that yes we will have sex and all then again i saw he blocked me and now i am very attracted to him and cant able to get out of his memories plss help

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
The entire equation would have been alright if you shared the same feelings, but you are saying that you are attracted to him. It would only lead to a heart break if you continue this relationship. Moreover, it seems like he is manipulating you to get intimate with him, with his blocking and unblocking technique. Please be careful while dealing with this kind of people. It’s best you rethink while reconnecting with him this time. You deserve someone who wants you the same way you want them.

Best Wishes.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 23, 2022

Listen
Relationship
Hi mam, I am a 19 years old girl. In 2019, after my 10th boards, I came across a guy in FB. He was 9 years older than me. He seemed to be a really nice and helping guy. And he also belonged from a prestigious university pursuing his research. After my 10th, I started preparing for entrance exams. So, he used to motivate me, give me validation, encourage me to do better in my mocks. It all happened online. I haven't even met this guy till date. At that time, he showed me the dream of targeting the best college of India of which I hadn't even thought of before. And I was also so motivated that I started studying hard. Besides, I started emotionally depending on him for validation. He is such a manipulating guy, that slowly I started falling in love with him. He told me that we should wait and see what the time decides. But, slowly he showed his real colours. He was just interested in 'friends with benefits' type of relationship with me. I strongly disagreed on it. Then days and months passed, his validation, manipulation, toxic and provocative words made me stand before an existential crisis. I used to cry out for the entire day. By 2020, during the lockdown phase, staying back at home, dealing with these sh***y things and exam pressure pushed me into depression. He made me insecure about every single thing... My academics, studies, results, my looks, my innocent nature, my previous success, my future.... every single thing. I eventually came to know he was just interested in sharing his life stories, getting an emotional support in his life, a good timepass element, hoping to get intimate with me someday. Moreover he was just interested in successful girls and ladies. So, all I thought at that period was that I have to succeed in my entrance exam at any cost and then everything will be alright.Unfortunately, I could not make it. I failed to qualify in my first attempt. I went into a severe depression, had to attend some online mental health rehab and counselling. To add salt to my wounds, the guy disclosed that he has been in a relationship since the past 1 year. And he is very happy. I broke down completely. For 5-6 months I could not study anything. I have an exam just round the corner. How can I just forget whatever happened and focus on my work? Please help and guide me... I am still having emotional breakdowns very frequently.
Ans:

Dear AI,

The nature of a virtual relationship can be the way that you have mentioned.

What is being shared virtually may not be reality and it is difficult to spot this.

Now that you know, isn’t it a lesson learned not to rely on anyone outside of you for your own happiness?

Did you have to study hard just so that you fit his choice of ‘successful’ women/girls?

Can you not work hard to live your dreams?

What you lack is self-love! Something that you didn’t focus on because you were working hard to prove how relevant you are in his life so that he chooses you.

Even if this relationship works, it will be his call always and other than strive hard to be in his life, there’s nothing that will grow in it.

Moreover, isn’t it a red flag when he revealed that he has been in a relationship for over a year?

Time to get back to yourself. Value yourself more, love yourself more…if you don’t, no one else will!

Start every morning doing these little things:

  • in gratitude for being alive
  • list down 3 things that you love about yourself
  • do one thing that you love at least for 15 minutes everyday
  • spend time in Nature
  • surround yourself with people that love you

These are tried and tested methods to get you out of a low phase.

Again, love yourself more and yet again!

All the best!

..Read more

Mohit

Mohit Arora  | Answer  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Jun 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 01, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hello, I am Afrin . I met this guy 3 years back through a dating app . We used to talk on weekends initially for few months . Then I started falling for him and I told him about it and that i would only like to continue if there is a future as we we can get married, he said he is Hindu and I am Muslim so it won't be possible for him so I strictly asked him not to contact me again as we want different things , after that we didn't talk for 4 months , and 4 months he called me again . I picked up , talked for two three weeks only on weekends and the same question i again asked he again said it won't be possible and I again told him not to contact me and he again stopped calling or texting me . After 6 months of this ,he again called ,I picked up. This time he said , he is moving to foreign country so it might be possible for him to marry . I believed , we kept talking now 3,4 days a week . We both were happy ,and enjoyed talking to each other , then finally after 2 years , he came to meet me from a different state . We met, i brought some of my friends with me . We spent 5 days , bt after 3 days ,I saw him behaving rudely .. I tried talking to him and I got to know that , since I was talking to my friends in our language , he misunderstood us thinking we were may be making fun of them . On 4th day , when my friends left , I went to his room and saw him using dating app .. I asked him to show me his phone he didnt show me and we had a heated argument. And he left me alone in that room , and the next day he had his flight .. i saw, he blocked me the day he left me in that room . I tried contacting him for the first in this two years but he blocked me every where . So , this way for 6 months I was blocked , after him unblocking me ,he neither called me not texted me , and I also didn't try to contact him . After after 1 year of him leaving me in that room, he called few days back , I picked up , and the way he was talking i dint like it as I could sense he was expecting the things from me which are against my values . And by now ,I lost feelings for him . So the first day I could say anything, the next day i told him clearly that i don't have feelings for him anymore , so if he is expecting something else from me he won't get it . If he wants to remain as friends he can ,rest I don't want to be in a relationship with him anymore . And after two days he again blocked me . What should I do if he again calls me ? Should I just block him now ? Or should I talk to him normally?
Ans: Don't pick up. Move on. Don't talk to him. Start meeting other guys

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |644 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 14, 2024

Relationship
Hello, I m 21 female I m in a long distance relationship with 32 year male.this person was behind me and always asked me to give him a chance to prove his love for me. At that period i was afaird of relationships as I didn't have courage to go against wish of my parents as i know they wolud never agree for love marriage,so that is fir sure i'll do arrange Marriage. All these things have been explained by my side to this person.He gad feelings for me thats what he showed to me even I felt a connection towards him, so we decided let's not commit anything anout marraige as we both wee not sure about these thing. After some time i realised these person has already made his mind ki he'll date me and he wanted to have everything that an relationship has but he will not marry me.But i m completely in love with.Even i told him about it ki I can't share him n won't be able to see him.with someone else.i just can't imagine myself without him. I fought with him even begged and cried but he always defend his self sayi g i told already ki he loves me and will keep loving me but will not marry me . He vists me after 6-9 months interval every time he visuts me he needs to have physical relationship. I don't know whether I m right or wrong but i feel like I m being used by him. I tried several time to end this relationship but i end up chasing him.Plz help me,guide me
Ans: Dear Rutuja,
If you have the slightest feeling that he doesn't share the same feelings for you as you do for him, or that he has wrong intentions, you have every right to end the relationship. In fact, that would be the right thing to do. I understand that it is difficult to break up with someone you love, but does he love you? Don't you think you deserve someone who loves you and does not make you feel as if you are being used?

Have a clear conversation with him- address all your concerns. If he still maintains his stand of not getting married to you, then let him know that you are not on the same page as him. Remember, for a relationship to work, your future goals need to align.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |644 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Feb 24, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 23, 2025
Relationship
I am a 24 year old woman. I had been texting to a guy on a dating app. We started chatting on Instagram. We even shared n*des mutually. We had agreed that we will only meet up for casual s*x, and the meeting was due in May. But, I began having feelings for him, I don't know how, because we never met in real life. Twice, he had forgiven me for going extra fast on the chatting thing. But the third time, when I confessed to him, my feelings, he blocked me on Instagram. I have tried messaging and sending follow request on Instagram, through my mother's account, but that was useless. I have been messaging him on Bumble as well, I think he hasn't blocked me from there yet. We were tuning-in good. He's from Delhi, am from Patna. Please help. Because forgetting him is not an easy task. I JUST CANNOT. Even when I'm doing something completely different, there are signs, that I see and feel, we will meet someday. His name appears or something like that. Tell me, will I meet him ever?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
When a person you have never met blocks you, it usually means that they are not interested in staying in touch with you. Now, I realize that it is hard to move on or the sudden loss of contact can be difficult to cope with, but it is important that you respect his boundaries. If he has blocked you, that only means he is not interested in interacting; constantly trying to get in touch with him not only lowers your self-respect but you are also ignoring his boundaries. Please wait for a while. If you mean anything to him, he will contact you. And if he doesn't, you should understand that this connection was never meant to be. Some things cannot be forced.

I hope this helps.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Shalini

Shalini Singh  |171 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Sep 02, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 02, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hi, I am 32M. I never had any relationships in the past...One sided was there but I overcame it and focused on my work. One day in gym i came across a girl 23F, we connected on insta and started chatting. Eventually we fell in love, I know this doesn’t sound good due to the age gap. We dated, had good times and emotionally connected with each other a lot. Now while discussing something, she revealed that she is not a virgin. There was a guy in her society she met around 3 years back (when she was 19) and she was in one sided love with him. They never confessed their love to each other. And she is not in touch with him anymore it was long back. Also she said she had made out with another guy whom she met 1 month back during her classes, prior to meeting me. I was really hurt to listen all these. Like how all these things she is doing at this age. I accepted her and then we had good 2 months again. After 2 months, I got to know she was following the first guy on insta. When confronted she said she used to like to see him and his girlfriend together. She was really not in touch with the guy but she was just following him. It was hurtful to me. We had a big fight on this. They used to share intimate pics with each other too. After forcing her to tell everything about her past, she told that she used to flirt with lot of boys. First in junior college with best friend she shared intimate pics, then met with the guy she lost virginity with, then she met another friend she shared pics with. Then in last year, in classes she shared pics with friend, then again with someone and then she had a crush on some guy with whom she made out. She was connected with them on insta. Like no talks but she was following them and they followed her too. There were almost 6-7 guys she used to talk as friend and has shared intimate pics and she called it flirting. I was shocked to hear all these. I am still shocked. This is out of my mind. It is very difficult to accept that few boys have intimate pics of my girlfriend. She has been very very loyal to me since we are together. She never got this kind of love in her life. She is really super happy in this relationship. We are emotionally connected a lot. I have treated her like a child and I love her a lot. She comes from a good family. She says she has been in wrong circle and all her friends are like this only. She cried a lot and she regrets it deeply like what she has done and she wants to get out of all these. But if feel, a persons character never changes. There will be so cold moments in relationships In future, will she be able to manage herself and stay honest. I really doubt a lot. She is really good at heart like a family girl but her past is really really terrible I feel. I feel, even though I love her will I be able to accept her past. Do I deserve this ? Do my family deserve this ? But again I think of risking it all because she is really invested in this relationship and I feel very bad to break her heart. I come from a very traditional background and believe in sacred and pure form of love. But I feel I got trapped in something which I can’t leave and can’t have whole heartedly. I am not able to focus on my work and everything. It’s hurting me a lot. Should I accept her ac she is or moving on will be better for both of us, even though it might break her heart.
Ans: Why are you thinking about the past, doing so you are messing up your now.
If you trust the person then do so 100% - let it not be half-baked.
Wishing you the best.

...Read more

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |10720 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Sep 02, 2025

Career
Hello sir.... I wanted to pursue ba/bsc psychology from a rci approved college but I don't have any clearity that what should be right. Since I have passed 12th in this year only I have given my cuet but my marks where not that good to get into any college I have filled the form of Calcutta University where I can get addmission through my 12th marks that is 72% overall but I didn't get into any as I'm from general category and cut offs are high.. mop up rounds are still yet to happen. But I talked there.. there are barely some colleges which are serious about teaching psychology and I don't think I can get into some good college that's why I'm thinking to take a drop I don't want to still and abhi bhi looking for some colleges which maybe have seat vacant so that I can try to get into that.. i don't have any clarity regarding which is good govt college because I can't afford private colleges whose fees is that high for pursuing psycology if I'm taking a gap year
Ans: Ayushi, With 72% in Class XII, you meet eligibility for most RCI-approved undergraduate psychology programs, which typically require 50–55% in PCM/Science or Humanities and English proficiency. The Rehabilitation Council of India (RCI) mandates that psychology graduates from approved institutions can register as professionals, so ensure the college holds RCI recognition or operates under a parent university with RCI-approved syllabi.

In West Bengal, government options are limited. The closely watched University of Calcutta offers a three-year BA Psychology through its morning shift at Ashutosh College and evening shift at Surendranath College with cutoffs often around 80% in general category. Vacancy rounds sometimes dip to 70–72%, so mop-up rounds could open seats. Rabindra Bharati University provides BA Psychology via merit; its cutoff hovers near 75%. Vidyasagar University in Midnapore and North Bengal University at Jalpaiguri offer BSc Psychology with lower cutoffs (65–70%), making them accessible.

Government colleges in Northern India include University of Delhi’s Cluster Innovation Centre and Gargi College, both offering BA Psychology admissions purely on Class XII marks. Their cutoffs range from 85–90%, so direct admission is unlikely at 72%, though invitation to waitlists in niche sections (e.g., evening courses) can occur. Banaras Hindu University’s BSc Psychology has a 70–75% cutoff in mop-up rounds. Panjab University (Chandigarh) and Punjab University (Patiala) allow 65–70% entries in BSc Psychology programs. University of Lucknow and Aligarh Muslim University also admit on board marks, often requiring 70–75%.

Affordable private institutions in West Bengal with RCI-approved curricula include St. Xavier’s College, Kolkata, which conducts its own merit list and lowers cutoffs to 72% in later rounds. Presidency University also admits psychology undergraduates through its merit list. In North India, Christ University (Bengaluru campus) and Amity University offer scholarships to board-mark entrants drops seats for those without CUET scores, but fees remain higher. DAV College, Chandigarh, and Maitreyi College, Delhi, provide BA Psychology at moderate fees (?30,000–40,000 per year) based on 12th marks.

Practical Roadmap and Solutions
Track Mop-Up Rounds and Merit Lists: Immediately monitor UC, Rabindra Bharati, Presidency, and St. Xavier’s websites daily for vacancies. Prepare scanned documents for swift online submission.

Apply to Multiple Institutes: Simultaneously apply to Vidyasagar University, North Bengal University, BHU, Panjab University, and Lucknow University in their ongoing merit-based admission windows. Their lower cutoffs increase chances.

Secure Waiting-List Positions: For high-demand colleges like Calcutta University and Delhi University, join all available waitlists, including evening programmes, which often have softer cutoffs.

Explore Evening/Shift Courses: Many reputed institutions offer evening or self-financed sections with relaxed cutoffs. Investigate Ashutosh College evening shift, DU evening courses, and PU self-financed sections.

Financial Planning for Private Colleges: Shortlist affordable options Inquire about scholarships or fee-installment plans at DAV College Chandigarh and Maitreyi College to help mitigate costs.

Bridge Courses and Summer Programs: As you finalize admissions, consider enrolling in online certificate courses in introductory psychology, research methods, and statistics from platforms like NPTEL or Coursera to enhance your portfolio.

Consider Gap-Year Strategy: If no suitable seat materializes by mid-October, plan a structured gap year focused on significantly improving CUET scores. Engage in disciplined self-study with coaching for CUET’s aptitude, English, and psychology modules.

CUET Preparation: Develop a timetable allocating two hours daily for CUET Psychology syllabus (foundations, developmental, abnormal, social, and research methods) and one hour for General English and Logical Reasoning. Use previous years’ CUET papers and take weekly mocks to track progress.

Alternate Entrance Exams: Some private universities conduct their own entrance tests (Christ University’s CUCET, Amity’s AUEET). Register for these supplementary exams to widen your admission avenues.

Mentorship and Counseling: Seek guidance from academic mentors or a career counselor to evaluate admission offers, financial implications, and long-term career trajectories in clinical, counseling, or research psychology.

By following this multipronged approach—pursuing merit-based vacancies, evening/self-financed programs, affordable private colleges, and preparing for CUET retake if required—you can maximize your chances of enrolling in an RCI-approved psychology UG programme without forfeiting a year.

Exhaust mop-up and merit-based admission options in government and reputed private colleges by mid-October, while preparing a robust CUET retake plan during a potential gap year to secure admission into top-tier psychology programs. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on 'Careers | Money | Health | Relationships'.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x