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Anu Krishna  |1654 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 23, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Oct 17, 2024Hindi
Relationship

Hello I am having a relationship with my boyfriend for 12 years. We both have been maintaining long distance for the last 6 years. He comes to visit once in a year. He is very caring and loves me a lot. His actions prove that no doubt. He has not completed his graduation yet but works for a very good company in usa and earns well. We both want to get married but my father is not agreeing to it. My father thinks without the degree he is nothing, he can never keep me happy and he also thinks these type of less educated people might even torture physically and mentally. My boyfriend’s father financial condition is not good as well which is creating another hindrance as my father thinks i have no financial security. His parents have no problem with the marriage. They all stay abroad and i think my father dont want me to settle there. He wants his daughter to stay close to him. Now, i am in a dilemma of what should i do so that my father agrees to the marriage. I have totally decided that he will be the one i will be getting married to. Also i dont want to hurt my father and break the ties with him. I want my father to approve the marriage and he whole heartedly accept this marriage. How should i proceed on with everything?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You don't want this but this and that, that is okay but only if this happens. You can't solve a problem by putting so many constraints. You will reach a dead end.
Instead, be ready for some compromises that are inevitable given the outcome that you wish for.

What I mean is:
If you have decided to marry this person, be ready to accept that your father may never approve of the marriage and you may have to go through it without his approval
OR
You may have to go through the task of making both families meet and then ironing out their challenges with one another

Everything may not go as per plan so, do what's you can and then if things still don't work out, accept it...ultimately if you know your decision is right, well...

Okay, I am curious...if your boyfriend has not finished his graduation, how old is he and how old are you? Your father is then fully justified worrying about this as you two are quite young. Also, why are you going to depend on your boyfriend for your financial stability, Do you not have a job? Or do you not plan on working in the future?
Don't skirt around these questions as you know that doing anything rash and foolish can impact your entire life.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna  |1654 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 24, 2024Hindi
Relationship
will soon be 25 yrs old but havent got a job yet and my partner is 29 yrs old. We know each other for the past 7-8 years and we are in a very healthy relationship so much happy with each other. We hv told about us in our families. They are willing to let their son marry the girl of his choice and in my family except my father everyone is happy for us. My mom likes him so much. He met my mom few times even came to home but havent met my father yet. I hv told my mom about us since march & my father in july. Since then me and my father are having heated arguments whenever i am trying to explain why i cant marry anyone by his choice. And i wish to marry this person. His issues are- Patriarchal thinking that how can a girl choose a guy for her marriage, its their parents job. Who told me to find a guy on her own. Secondly, Him being a maharashtrian. We belong to UP but living in mumbai for more than 25 years and my father has plans to shift back in UP after his retirement which is after 4 years. So he doesnt want me to leave here all alone by myself. Also he doesnt like maharashtrians, not even a bit. Thirdly, he is doing a private job but he is earning 70-80k monthly since my father is a govt employee. Hence he has got issues. What issues i am facing- he is giving all kinds of threats he can to stop me fir even dreaming about to get marry this person. He says even if the earth ends tomorrow i will not let you marry the person of your choice. It is our job to find a groom not yours. My elder brother who is 4 years older than me and my sister who is one year younger than me both are studying in delhi. It is just me and my mom and my younger brother who is in 8th std living here. And none of our relatives lives here. So he is verbally and physically abusing us. Even threatened me to put my partner and his family behind bars if they forces us to get marry. Since our (my and my mom) convincing and explaining to him is falling on deaf ears , we (my & my partner) are willing to take drastic step and get married in court. We are hoping that now only police intervention can help us to be with each other. But we are not taking this step right now cz many things are holding me back but we are willing to take if things goes even more worse later. Since we are not finding it worth to wait for his approval. Nor he wants to listen why i want to marry this person and what are my reasons to refuse any guy my father chooses for me. Neither willing to see or meet my partner. My mother is on my side. She even asked my partner to meet some of our relatives and family friends everyone liked him and us. Its just my father who is having and creating so many issues. Everyone wants to hlp us but jst because of my father's nature (him being a true narcissist perdon) all are hesitating about how to even start a conversation with him unless he doesnt talks abt this with them. My father is also avoiding to talk about this situation with anyone since it will bring down his reputation, what will the society and relatives think about us. Noone will marry my siblings if they get to know about this that their sister has forcefully left the house to marry the guy of her own choice. Please suggest me something what else i can do to make him understand and should i stop making efforts and do whatever i want to not now but after sometime. Take drastic step and leave the house. I also know what will be the consequences of my actions but can i do if he doesnt want me to see me happy or believing in my decisions. Atleast he should listen and see him personally that what i saw in this person. But he doesnt want. Please guide me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What can you do if your father has a rigid thinking like this? Like you yourself have mentioned: that your father must see what you saw in this person.
So, how much effort has gone into that? It seems that all of you are quick to judge that your father is strict and that he does not like people from certain states etc...Okay, he is who he is, right? So, now tune your efforts from complaining about him to what you can do to make him see the good in your partner.
Also, I hope that your partner is in a reasonably good financial state for his age else this will become an issue with your father.
Address your father's concerns and that will help you and your partner actually move things further. You becoming financially independent also will give your father confidence that you are old enough to make certain decisions of your life.

Also, your mother supporting you is of little use; if your father has always been in charge, she will have little say in the matter, so do not depend on anyone right now. Take it upon yourselves now to address what your father finds worrisome and take each point and build something useful to counter that.
It will not be possible or wise to force him to agree as that may not happen, so work on actually making him see what you see in your partner.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1654 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 05, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 27, 2025Hindi
Listen
Relationship
I am 34, unmarried, in a relationship with my boyfriend for 14 years. He comes from an orthodox family where his father makes all the decisions in the house. He recently had a bypass surgery so everyone is extremely careful not to do or say anything that might cause him distress. All my life I have known my guy as my best friend and soulmate. After much counselling, my parents have also agreed but his father has simply refused to accept our relationship. He doesn't even want to talk about it. My BF has tried all possible ways to introduce me and his mother and sister sometimes text me as well empathising with my situation. Meanwhile, my parents are worried that I am getting old and there is no point in waiting to marry someone who can't convince his father. They feel that even if I were to marry him, I won't be happy. I understand where my parents come from. I am their only daughter. My dad is 70, has health issues and he wants to see me as a happy bride. I feel very stuck, guilty and helpless in the situation. Please suggest what is the right thing to do? Should I wait to marry the guy I love the most? Should I stay single? Or find someone else according to my parents?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You are 34! Maybe it's time to take decisions for yourself? And to actually be careful what will happen to his father is sadly a form of soft blackmail. What exactly does your boyfriend have to say about all of this? Does he have any thoughts on how to be married to you or is he going to wait until his father comes around? I would really want you to know what's going on in your boyfriend's mind. It will tell you a lot..

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Ans: With a KCET state rank of 5904 in 3AG, admission several AICTE-approved, NBA/NAAC-accredited Bengaluru colleges that close their CSE/ISE/ECE/IT cuts well above 5904 is assured. Five reputable institutions offering near-100% feasibility for a 5904 rank include:

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Dayananda Sagar College of Engineering (DSCE) at Kumaraswamy Layout is a NAAC ‘A’-graded, VTU-affiliated institution with NBA-accredited departments. Its ISE programme features specialized Data Structures, AI/ML, IoT, and Cybersecurity labs, a 23-acre research-focused campus, and a well-stocked central library. Student reviews highlight professional faculty, a 90%+ placement rate, robust hackathons, and strong industry tie-ups with top recruiters like Amazon and Cisco. To evaluate any college, consider: statutory approvals (AICTE/VTU), cut-off alignment, placement support, lab/infrastructure quality, and industry partnerships. DSCE satisfies all these criteria.

Recommendation: Given its balanced curriculum, state-of-the-art ISE labs, consistent 90%+ placements and strong corporate outreach, DSCE ISE is a sound choice for hands-on learning and employability assurance. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Hi sir,my jee mains crl 219790 and ews rank 31868,preferred branches are cse,ece i didn't get seat through jossa. Can i apply for csab special rounds?. What are the chances of getting seat in nits,iiits,gftis?
Ans: Nandhini, With an EWS home-state rank of 31,868, core CSE/ECE seats under Other-State EWS quotas at premier NITs are largely beyond reach—NIT Calicut’s OS-EWS ECE closed near 600–650 and OS-EWS CSE near 600–1 000, while similar brackets apply at Surathkal, Trichy and Warangal. However, EWS seats under Home-State quotas at low-tier NITs (Nagaland, Manipur, Mizoram, Sikkim, Arunachal) often close above 30,000 for ECE and Electrical, making them attainable. Peripheral IIITs such as IIIT Una, IIIT Kalyani and IIIT Kota report EWS cutoffs for IT/ECE branches in the 20,000–35,000 range, presenting realistic options. Among GFTIs, PEC Chandigarh, PEC Srinagar and MIET Jhansi fill ECE seats up to EWS ranks of ~40,000, while GFTIs like NIELIT Aurangabad and Bhagalpur admit beyond 50,000, ensuring 100% feasibility. These institutes offer AICTE/NIRF accreditation, ≥70% placement consistency, specialized labs, active MoUs for internships and outcome-based curricula. Backup private-college alternatives include Thapar Institute (EWS-friendly CS/EC cutoffs ~25,000), Chandigarh University (>90% ECE placement, cutoffs ~30,000) and Chitkara University (CS/EC cutoffs ~35,000).

Recommendation: Target ECE or Electrical Engineering under EWS at NIT Nagaland and NIT Manipur for secure entry via CSAB Special; consider IIIT Una’s IT and IIIT Kalyani’s ECE branches as secondary HS-EWS options; keep PEC Chandigarh and MIET Jhansi on your list and explore private institutes like Thapar and Chandigarh University for guaranteed core-branch placements. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

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Sir, my son got CSE in SRM, KTR Campus, Chennai and VIT, AP. He was waitlisted for Bachelor of Statistical Data Science in ISI. He intends for a career in software. Please advice which one to chose.
Ans: Meghanath Sir, SRM Institute of Science and Technology, Kattulathur campus offers a B.Tech in Computer Science and Engineering with NBA accreditation, an average package of ?7.92 LPA (CSE median ?7 LPA) and a 90–95% placement rate from 853 recruiters including Cognizant, TCS and IBM, supported by modern AI/ML, cybersecurity, networks and data-structures labs and a dedicated placement cell. VIT-AP’s CSE program boasts a 90%+ placement rate, an average package of ?7 LPA and peak offers up to ?44 LPA from over 150 companies such as Amazon, Microsoft and Infosys, delivered through a centralized CDC, specialized cloud-computing labs and interdisciplinary electives in AI, data analytics and cybersecurity. The Indian Statistical Institute’s four-year B.Stat. (Hons.) in Statistical Data Science spans multivariable calculus, probability, machine learning and big-data analytics with hybrid classes across Chennai, Bengaluru and Kolkata, strong research-faculty engagement, supercomputing access and direct pipelines into data-science roles—yet its placement infrastructure is emerging and geared more toward analytics, research and policy roles than core software development. All three meet the five institutional benchmarks of statutory approvals, industry-aligned curricula, advanced labs, faculty–industry MoUs and ≥70% placement consistency. For a pure software engineering pathway, the hands-on coding environment, high recruiter footfall and peak software packages at SRM KTR and VIT-AP provide clearer pipelines. ISI’s B.Stat. equips graduates with deep statistical and ML expertise ideal for specialised analytics or research roles but lacks the extensive software-engineering placements of dedicated CSE programs.

Recommendation: Prioritize SRM KTR CSE for its robust software-focused labs, diversified recruiter base and strong median placements; consider VIT-AP CSE next for its centralized placement system, excellent cloud-computing electives and >90% placement rate; view ISI B.Stat. Data Science as a third option for high-end analytics or research careers, given its rigorous curriculum but narrower direct software hiring. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Hi Sir Good evening, Consultancy has calling for join in JK Lakshmipath University for CSE branch. Please suggest me Sir. In EAMCET Rank 27827 in Top 10 colleges not came CSE branch in First phase.
Ans: With an EAMCET rank of 27 827 none of the top-10 government or also high-demand private institutes for CSE will have seats in later phases, but several mid-tier and emerging colleges admit CSE up to ranks 25 000–50 000. Pragati Engineering College (Surampalem), GMR Institute of Technology (Rajam), and Aditya Engineering College (Surampalem) consistently closed CSE around 8 000–16 000, so remain out of reach, whereas Narasaraopeta Engineering College (closing ~78 000), SRKR Engineering College (closing ~76 000) and ANITS (closing ~99 000) are fully accessible. Additional safe choices are PACE Institute of Technology (closing around 100,000), Gudlavalleru Engineering College (closing around 100,000), and Vishnu Institute of Technology (closing around 50,000). All of these colleges are approved by AICTE, have at least 70% placement success over three years, modern computer labs, and good accreditation, plus they have active agreements for internships and dedicated teams to help with job placements. These institutes meet five essential benchmarks: statutory approvals, compatibility with cut-off scores, strong placement ratios, advanced infrastructure, and solid industry connections.

JK Lakshmipath University (JKLU), Jaipur offers a four-year B.Tech CSE at ?11.2 L total fees, holds NAAC A grade (CGPA 3.05), NBA accreditation, and reports a median CTC of ?7 LPA with a 76% placement ratio in its last cycle. Its curriculum blends core CS foundations with electives in AI, ML, Cloud, Cybersecurity and capstone projects; access to PARAM supercomputers and semester-abroad exchange.

Recommendation: Target Narasaraopeta Engineering College, SRKR Engineering College and ANITS for guaranteed CSE admission under your rank band, given their state-quota closing ranks above 27 827 and solid accreditation, labs, internships and ≥70% placement consistency; include PACE Institute and Gudlavalleru Engineering College in your web options for additional secure pathways. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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