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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 20, 2024

Ashish Sehgal has over 20 years of experience as a counsellor. He holds a doctorate in neuro linguistic programming, mental health and social welfare.He is certified in neurolinguistics by both the Society of NLP and the American Board of NLP.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jan 19, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hello Dr.Sehgal, my wife has separated, for her personal priorities, citing physical abuse. How can I win her back?

Ans: 'm sorry to hear that your wife has separated from you. It's important to understand that abuse is never okay, and it's never the victim's fault. If you're looking for help to understand your situation and how to heal, I would encourage you to seek professional help.

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Anu

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 15, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 02, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
My wife aged 40 years left me after 20 years of marriage. We had one son aged 19 years also. She is citing mental torture by me as the main reason for her decision. She is never allowing to negotiate on the separation issue and is refusing to attend meetings with parents, elders, relationship counceller etc. She only tells that she had suffered a lot till now and will never stay with me in future. She insists for settlement of a house or equivalent money in cash and divorce. I insisted that the past disputes were minor in nature and not sufficient ground for divorce/separation and assured that I will be more careful in future and will never make her sad. Still she is reluctant and avoids any thing that brings reunion possible. She is not having any crush on another person but intends to live a solitude life. She found a job and is living independently without my son. Pl guide me what to do TSR
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It seems clear that your wife does not want a reconciliation. If that is the case, it's better to engage a lawyer that can clearly state the terms of divorce settlement. If mutual consent does not work, this might not be very amicable...hence the lawyer drawing up the terms is a wise option.
I understand that you might want to give the marriage another chance, but if she is unwilling, what can you do? Try and request her for one conversation and express your desire to reconcile...but if she is firm...don't push the agony anymore...find a capable lawyer who knows how to draft a clear agreement of what you want to retain and what is fair for her. Also, if she isn't taking care of the child, then it becomes evident that you are responsible solely for him.
Think quickly and wisely and do the right thing...

All the best!

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |676 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 01, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 23, 2023Hindi
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Hi Ravi, I am 40 yrs old and have been married to my lwife for 12 years. There has been many issues between us ranging from my family's behaviour towards her, my failures in meeting her expectations especially behavioural patterns/attention. Her complain towards me is that I didn't give her the kind of attention and affection which she deserved. I acknowledge that because I struggled very hard in my initial phase of career. In today's scenario she has totally lost interest in me and get attracted towards men who even shows some attention towards her. This is has happened a couple of times. Whenever I countered her for these incidents she tell that it was I who forced her to do all this. I am ready to commit my efforts to make our relationship better but she says she can't have those kind of feelings again for me. She is under constant stress and anxiety due to this and is affecting her health a lot. She is a good person by nature so I don't want to leave her but considering the toxicity of the relation and her deteriorating health due to this relation I suggested her to get separated but she says that she can't divorce because of family/other issues. I can see her struggle/pain in this forced relationship and wanted to help her but can't find out the way. Please help.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I understand that you are in a tricky situation and appreciate that you are putting your partner's needs first. In this situation, there's really no one to blame. You could not give her the attention she deserved but there was always a genuine reason for it. It would have been the right choice to separate since she declared her disinterest in the marriage but even that doesn't seem like an option. There's only one thing left, to peacefully co-exist and continue to put in the effort you couldn't in all those years. Continue to live with mutual respect for the marriage, if not love. Put up some ground rules- things that you are comfortable with her doing and things you aren't; consider going for marriage counseling. Professional help can give you the structured support to bring your marriage back on track, slowly but considerably more than trying your own tricks.

One more thing, don't forget to take care of your mental health. If your wife does not want to seek counseling, you can always go for it. It helps us dig deep and gain clarity over what is important and what should not burden us.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

Love Guru

Love Guru   | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 16, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 15, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello sir I am 37 years old male and married since 5 years and we had little girl of 4 years old. I need some advice for my relationship. We had problems in our relationship since the beginning of our engagement, as initially I was unaware of my wife's extra marital affairs when I come to know about it she told why she started to see other boy during engagement period also after our marriage as I wasn't upto her expectations, that was the time of 2019 . We had discussed about all each others expectations and solved the problem I tried to regain the confidence in our relationship but still somewhere we had fights every 5 to 6 months on different issues sometimes it's my parents sometimes it's me I dont give her time sometimes financially , in between she left my house and went to her father's home for 8 months after delivery of our baby girl, she told we are not made for each other I told her and explained all about consequences and convinced her to get her back. After that for again after 6 months we started fight with each other on different issues. But recently we fight and she lost control and slapped me and unfortunately in the vague of my anger I also slapped her and she again left me and went to her father house . It's been 1 month now we don't have contact each other because every time I only asked her for compromises and explain and convincing her to come back. This time I don't know what to do.thanks
Ans: Marriage counselling. Enlist at the earliest and see if you can fix matters, but you have to tackle one issue at a time. The infidelity, the inlaws, the lack of compatibility…there’s too many issues here.

..Read more

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Dr Dipankar

Dr Dipankar Dutta  |1837 Answers  |Ask -

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Dec 05, 2025

Career
Dear Sir, I did my BTech from a normal engineering college not very famous. The teaching was not great and hence i did not study well. I tried my best to learn coding including all the technologies like html,css,javascript,react js,dba,php because i wanted to be a web developer But nothing seem to enter my head except html and css. I don't understand a language which has more complexities. Is it because of my lack of experience or not devoting enough time. I am not sure. I did many courses online and tried to do diplomas also abroad which i passed somehow. I recently joined android development course because i like apps but the teaching was so fast that i could not memorize anything. There was no time to even take notes down. During the course i did assignments and understood the code because i have to pass but after the course is over i tend to forget everything. I attempted a lot of interviews. Some of them i even got but could not perform well so they let me go. Now due to the AI booming and job markets in a bad shape i am re-thinking whether to keep studying or whether its just time waste. Since 3 years i am doing labour type of jobs which does not yield anything to me for survival and to pay my expenses. I have the quest to learn everything but as soon as i sit in front of the computer i listen to music or read something else. What should i do to stay more focused? What should i do to make myself believe confident. Is there still scope of IT in todays world? Kindly advise.
Ans: Your story does not show failure.
It shows persistence, effort, and desire to improve.

Most people give up.
You didn’t.
That means you will succeed — but with the right method, not the old one.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |676 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 02, 2025Hindi
Relationship
My married ex still texts me for comfort. Because of him, I am unable to move on. He makes me feel guilty by saying he got married out of family pressure. His dad is a cardiac patient and mom is being treated for cancer. He comforts me by saying he will get separated soon and we will get married because he only loves me. We have been in a relationship for 14 years and despite everything we tried, his parents refused to accept me, so he chose to get married to someone who understands our situation. I don't know when he will separate from his wife. She knows about us too but she comes from a traditional family. She also confirmed there is no physical intimacy between them. I trust him, but is it worth losing my youth for him? Honestly, I am worried and very confused.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand how difficult it is to let go of a relationship you have built from scratch, but is it really how you want to continue? It really seems to be going nowhere. His parents are already in bad health and he married someone else for their happiness. Does it seem like he will be able to leave her? So many people’s happiness and lives depend on this one decision. I think it’s about time you and your BF have a clear conversation about the same. If he can’t give a proper timeline, please try to understand his situation. But also make sure he understands yours and maybe rethink this equation. It really isn’t healthy. You deserve a love you can have wholly, and not just in pieces, and in the shadows.

Hope this helps

...Read more

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