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Dr Ashish Sehgal | Answer |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 29, 2023

Ashish Sehgal has over 20 years of experience as a counsellor. He holds a doctorate in neuro linguistic programming, mental health and social welfare.He is certified in neurolinguistics by both the Society of NLP and the American Board of NLP.... more

Question by Bj on Mar 17, 2023Hindi

Hello Doctor, I am a 42 year old working woman, happily married for the last 17 yrs, I have had a total work experience of about 18 yrs and at a mid-mgt level at work, I have a problem, I have worked extremely hard and long hours most of my life and now I have come to a point where I no longer want to work as hard. While I am good at what I do, and get appreciated at work and also have been getting monetary rewards, I also realise that I have a certain episode at times where I am no longer in control of my emotions at work, there have been two episodes in the last 1 year where I cant control my tears and have excused myself and gone to the washroom to be able to stop the episode; and sometimes the reasons are trivial, I dont know what to do to keep myself calm during such episodes. I have tried multiple things like deep breathing when the situation like this arises, i try to do a mental math, try my best to analyse what is the trigger point, but I seem to have no control over this emotional breakdown. What can I do to deal with this ? I am embarrassed of myself and find it difficult to confide in anyone when this situation comes. Please help.

Ans: I'm sorry to hear that you are experiencing difficulty controlling your emotions at work. It sounds like you are experiencing emotional dysregulation, which can be challenging to manage. There are several strategies that you can try to help you cope better with these episodes:

Mindfulness: Practice mindfulness meditation regularly, as this can help you stay more present and centered in the moment. This practice involves focusing your attention on your breath, physical sensations in your body, or other objects of attention. The goal is to observe your thoughts and feelings without judgment or reaction, which can help you respond more effectively in difficult situations.

Identify Triggers: It is important to identify what is causing these emotional breakdowns at work. You may want to keep a journal to track the triggers that set off these episodes. Once you have identified the triggers, you can work on ways to minimize or eliminate them.

Self-care: It is important to take care of yourself, both physically and mentally. This includes getting enough sleep, exercise, eating healthy foods, and engaging in activities that you enjoy.

Seek support: It may be helpful to talk to a therapist or counselor who can help you develop coping strategies for dealing with your emotions. A therapist can also help you explore the root causes of your emotional dysregulation and work with you to develop a plan for managing it.

Seek professional help: In some cases, emotional dysregulation can be a symptom of an underlying mental health condition. If you are experiencing other symptoms, such as difficulty sleeping, persistent sadness or anxiety, or changes in appetite or energy levels, it may be a good idea to speak with a mental health professional.

Remember that it is okay to feel emotions and that you do not have to suppress them. However, learning to regulate them can help you manage them more effectively and prevent them from interfering with your work and personal life.