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Anu Krishna |1745 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 24, 2025

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 13, 2025

I had a 2 years relationship with a girl. Last year she left me for another guy and gave him her virginity and got pregnant. After getting abortion that guy left her. Now she came back to me and talked to me for about 2 months just as friends but i loved her so much that i forgave her and accepted her and we got in relationship. But one night she told me about all her past with her 2nd boyfriend. Now i don't want to keep relationship as her past makes me shiver and i promised her for marriage but i can't get over the fact that she cheated me and lost virginity to another guy then came back and wants me to marry her. So if i am not sure of marriage should i involve in physical activities with her ( we never envolved in physical activities before ) or should i avoid doing that until i am sure of marrying her.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You are not even sure whether you want to accept her past with the other guy. If you have not made peace with this, why talk of marriage and indulging in physical stuff with her? It's not her this time; it's YOU!
So, take a break from this association, clear your mind space on what you want from life and a life partner. If she is the person you know that fits the description, then perhaps the past will not matter. Mere love is not enough, what you value in a relationship is in question now...so, take time to think i through and then make a decision on it.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Asked by Anonymous - Jul 02, 2024Hindi

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Before coming into our relationship I knew that my girlfriend had a past relationship of 3 years. I asked about it just to clarify if anything was there which will harm our upcoming relationship we gona Start. She mentioned that she did not liked her past relationship and other stuff and she mentioned she had not any physical relationship of any kind with her ex . But now after we came into relationship after 2 years. I found out that she had a physical relationship with her ex . But no intercourse but other stuff. I could not believe her words when she told all this and she been laying all the things I asked if it was your first time and other things. I had no such relationship as of myself and told her that I hate such types where u already experienced stuffs with others . What should I do . I like her too she too loves me . But the thing I found out haunts me and make me fill miserable

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am sorry that you are hurting but her past truly should not matter to you in the present. Ideally, I am not in favor of pushing people to disclose their past experiences, especially if they are not comfortable with it. But I agree that she was wrong to get into a relationship with you when you specifically showed dislike towards the things you mentioned. I suppose she liked you too much and did not want to ruin her chances. I should also mention that judging a person by their past or because they had certain kinds of relations with their ex is not fair; you were not in the picture. Regardless of it, your pain is valid. It isn't easy to come to terms with new information about your partner's past.

Now hear me out, past is in the past. It can only hurt you if you let it. Think about it properly- did she do anything in the present to hurt you? NO. Can you or she change the past? NO. Should she apologize for having a past? NO. Should you move past this and work towards a better future? That's the only thing in your control. Chose wisely. If you think you will hold her accountable for this forever, then you both should reconsider this relationship. If you think this fight is meaningless, and want to move forward with your relationship, then great.

Best Wishes.

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Asked by Anonymous - Mar 06, 2025

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I am in a relationship with a girl since 2 years, we have a lot of differences like, she is more than 3 years older than me, our castes are different and she is marathi and I am non marathi. But apart from all this she has just got divorced from court legally, till now she was living separately from his ex husband. She had a affair for about 10 years with her ex but they started living separately just after 8 months of marriage. When I met this girl, we both fell in love, but there were 2-3 mistakes from my side during the first year of our relationship. I lied on small things thinking she will get hurt if she knows that. I haven't cheated, not even talked personal things with any other girl. And for the last one year i have been as honest as anyone can be. But I feel she is not like she used to be. I don't know if I can even call this a relationship anymore. Since we are colleagues we talk in office, we go out for dinner, we still talk lot of personal things too, but that spark is not there. I wanted to marry this girl once. What should I do now?

Ans: Hello sir. Sir, since relationships are very sensitive and the decision to marry someone is an important decision which should be taken with lot of patience so that you don't regret it later. And the thing which you said that she has changed, she may have changed due to your lies. I appreciate that now you are honest with her. Spark needs to be created. It will not remain without effort. If she is sincere with you and you are loyal with her and you both feel that you can spend life together, you should go ahead. Nobody remains the same through out the life. Changes always come. Sit patiently with your friend and discuss the options and see work out if you both want to get married. Then take a decision. I hope this solves your problem.
Take care!
Follow me: https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

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I met a girl thought arranged marriage, it's been a 2 week we are talking on vcall and message all day. Abd we like each other a lot. Our thinking match a lot. Sometimes i feel she is understanding me properly and it will be the best relationship for me. She said that she has been 6 to 7 relationship and she was physical with them all along in her past but she will be loyal and devoted to me. Other side I've never been to any kinda relationship in my past and I was focusing on my career and I achive a lot. To be honest I am not able to digest that she was with 7 to 8 guys in proper physical relationship in last 10years. And now she want to settle with me. She is not bringing anything on table other than understanding and look. And I am bringing he'll lot of money, look and understanding. Only thinking killing me is she was with 7 to 8 guys. I didn't meet her yet, we talked a 2 week now family asked to meet an finalize the but look wise I like her but this point is not going away from my mind. I'll be the 9th guy and what she will look after 10th and 11th guy? What should I do?

Ans: So what? Sex is a good thing..even if she slept with those been men it's okay. You didn't because you didn't have options. Had you the same number of options, you would have too.

And likely she is downplaying it.. The number could be bigger but kudos to her for being honest about her 7 to 9 partners. Make sure she is not faking it just for your money.

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Dear Sir, I did my BTech from a normal engineering college not very famous. The teaching was not great and hence i did not study well. I tried my best to learn coding including all the technologies like html,css,javascript,react js,dba,php because i wanted to be a web developer But nothing seem to enter my head except html and css. I don't understand a language which has more complexities. Is it because of my lack of experience or not devoting enough time. I am not sure. I did many courses online and tried to do diplomas also abroad which i passed somehow. I recently joined android development course because i like apps but the teaching was so fast that i could not memorize anything. There was no time to even take notes down. During the course i did assignments and understood the code because i have to pass but after the course is over i tend to forget everything. I attempted a lot of interviews. Some of them i even got but could not perform well so they let me go. Now due to the AI booming and job markets in a bad shape i am re-thinking whether to keep studying or whether its just time waste. Since 3 years i am doing labour type of jobs which does not yield anything to me for survival and to pay my expenses. I have the quest to learn everything but as soon as i sit in front of the computer i listen to music or read something else. What should i do to stay more focused? What should i do to make myself believe confident. Is there still scope of IT in todays world? Kindly advise.

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Implants have some definite advantages over removable dentures. They provide a stable and secure fit, improved chewing and speech.
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My married ex still texts me for comfort. Because of him, I am unable to move on. He makes me feel guilty by saying he got married out of family pressure. His dad is a cardiac patient and mom is being treated for cancer. He comforts me by saying he will get separated soon and we will get married because he only loves me. We have been in a relationship for 14 years and despite everything we tried, his parents refused to accept me, so he chose to get married to someone who understands our situation. I don't know when he will separate from his wife. She knows about us too but she comes from a traditional family. She also confirmed there is no physical intimacy between them. I trust him, but is it worth losing my youth for him? Honestly, I am worried and very confused.

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I understand how difficult it is to let go of a relationship you have built from scratch, but is it really how you want to continue? It really seems to be going nowhere. His parents are already in bad health and he married someone else for their happiness. Does it seem like he will be able to leave her? So many people’s happiness and lives depend on this one decision. I think it’s about time you and your BF have a clear conversation about the same. If he can’t give a proper timeline, please try to understand his situation. But also make sure he understands yours and maybe rethink this equation. It really isn’t healthy. You deserve a love you can have wholly, and not just in pieces, and in the shadows.

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Asked by Anonymous - Dec 02, 2025Hindi

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Hi Anu, My husband doesn't do house chores. We both work full-time, but I still end up cooking, cleaning, and doing laundry. When I ask for help, my partner will say, ‘Just tell me what to do,’ but then he conveniently forgets. Maybe he doesn't like it or he is genuinely forgetful. I have tried many ways to make him explain. Once I only did my share of laundry to make him realise but he simply ignored. Every week this pattern repeats. Is this normal? How can married couples divide responsibilities fairly to avoid fights?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Every home has a different routine and share of responsibilities. So, there's no standard norm to challenge it as normal or not!
So, if you want your husband to pitch in, then say it in clear terms, especially since he has told you to tell him what to do.
Once you have told him, do make sure to ask him: Will you find it convenient to do it now or later? If later, when?
This will ensure that he makes a statement of commitment, so there's no question of forgetting it, right? Play it smart...it's better than feeling bad about the situation or mulling over why something does not work.

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Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Question by Santosh - Oct 20, 2025Hindi

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Feeling alone in the world and iam not having any close friends everybody is busy with their works and family, help me what to do

Ans: Dear Santosh,
Everybody has a life and so do you; build your life the way that you want...
Start attending weekend events or any social gathering in the city/town that you live in; even a smile or a hi, hello can be start to a good association when you can further discuss and chat on mutual interests and hobbies.
A humble effort in this direction can change the state that you are in.

All the best!
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Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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