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Confused: My friend's wife flirted for years, now ignores me – what's going on?

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |579 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 09, 2025

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
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Asked by Anonymous - Apr 08, 2025Hindi
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Relationship

My friend's wife has been flirting with me since last 13/14 years but since last 1 or 2 years we have been only talking. Now whenever I talk to her on the phone she does not reply. And when people from all societies meet her, she talks a lot but it is not like before. What should I do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that you are dealing with something very emotionally confusing and sensitive. But, from the very beginning it has been wrong, don’t you think? I don’t want to assume that you flirted back or indulged in the behavior, but to begin with, the dynamics were off, given she’s your friend’s wife. Chances are she realized that it wasn’t right, and decided to rectify it by setting boundaries. If that’s the case, I would advise you to respect the boundaries and do not push her or over-pursue her. I would also suggest you reflect on why it bothers you so much?

If you still want answers, you can ask her but very carefully- for instance, “I noticed that we don’t talk much these days. Is there something bothering you? If so, I totally understand and respect your decision. I just wanted to know if I did anything wrong.” This way you are not putting the blame on her.

Hope this helps.

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I am married since 2010 but me and my wife do not get along.We live together for the sake of our 8 year old son.Last year I fell in love with a new female colleague who joined our office. We used to speak very warmly to each other and she shared a lot of details with me about her past life such as her childhood.We would flirt with each other playfully and share details of our daily life.She is also married with a child but she doesn't spend too much time with her husband and seems very independent.I felt like she liked me too. However after 4 months she suddenly said that she looked at me as her office colleague and was not interested in personal conversations. I have sent her many messages on Whatsapp asking her about the reason behind her indifference and she reads everyone of them. She hasn't blocked me but she doesn't respond. Even when I go to her directly she talks to me in a cold manner.But she also asked me about my mother's health when she heard that my mother was undergoing cancer treatment.I am unable to understand why is she acting like this and I also cannot let go of her.Can you please explain what is going on
Ans: Dear Boudhayan,
Office romances are fleeting ones that offer some respite from the routine home environment.

Obviously being married, it comes with it's own set of challenges with having to hide text messages, calls...it's stressful for you and her as well. Did you consider that her being cold now maybe because her husband might have found out OR that she is having a hard time juggling two lives. Out of marriage experiences can be draining...

Instead of seeking solace elsewhere, have you made an honest attempt to work on your marriage? Give that a fair chance first...Stepping out of marriage is an easy thing than working on a marriage which has a clot of challenges...but since you have decided to stay together for the sake of your 8-year old, you might as well work on your relationship with your wife...start with basic communication and seek the help of a professional if necessary...you maybe surprised that things have worked out...if not, then you can see, what can be done...

Intense connections like marriage or a relationship require a lot of time and energy...
Respect what the other lady might be going through...give her time and space to sort out what is happening at her home...also, she cares enough to ask you about your wellbeing...Be happy with what IS and do give your marriage an honest rebuilding...

All the best!

..Read more

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Sushil

Sushil Sukhwani  |594 Answers  |Ask -

Study Abroad Expert - Answered on Apr 24, 2025

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Hello Sir. My Son has got offer from follwing University.. 1)University of Padua - Italy (BSC - Information Technology) - 3 years Course 2)University Of Strathclyde - UK (BSC - HON Computer Science) - 4 yrs 3)Caledonian University of Glassgow - UK (Bsc Hons Computing). 4 yrs 4) National College of Ireland (BSC - HON Computer Science Engg) - 4 yrs We are confused to select the university / country
Ans: Hello ASAD,

First and foremost, thank you for getting in touch with us. I am glad to know that your son has received offers from the above mentioned universities. As an answer to your query, I would like to tell you that a prestigious and budget-friendly education in a lively Italian environment, along with a reputable academic standing and lower living expenses is offered at the University of Padua; its 3-year BSC - Information Technology may also provide a quicker path to higher education or jobs. Coming to the University of Strathclyde, top-ranked in the UK for Computer Science, this university is renowned for its linkages with industry, research possibilities, as well as outstanding student services, offering robust employment opportunities. Next, situated in a student-centric city with budget-friendly costs in comparison to other cities in the UK, Glasgow Caledonian University focuses on hands-on, industry-focused learning with impressive graduate employment rates. The National College of Ireland provides a small, contemporary campus in Dublin with robust ties with the technology sector, internships, and employment prospects in one of Europe’s key technology hotspots.

Lastly, deciding which university and country to select depends on your son’s professional objectives, ideal learning atmosphere, budget, as well as plans for the future- whether he prefers a shorter course term, robust industrial connections, global exposure, or residing in a specific nation.

For more information, you can visit our website: www.edwiseinternational.com

You can also follow us on our Instagram page: edwiseint

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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