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Anu Krishna  |1745 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 07, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Leena Question by Leena on Feb 02, 2023Hindi
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I am brought up in a middle class family where both my parents were working. I am the elder sister and I have a younger brother. Since childhood i feel that my mother has given more time and efforts towards my brother. When he asks something he gets it and when I ask I'm told that it's not required. My mother pretends that she treats both of us equal but i can feel the difference. I'm currently married with a 4 year old kid. My husband is very loving and we have a happy family. My issue now begins when my mother comes to stay/visit us. She begins pointing faults and imposing decisions on us. She does that same with my husband and he doesn't like it either. My mother wants to prove herself right even if she is wrong and will never accept her faults. She is interfering with my child's upbringing too. She will never ever behave like that with my brother. I won't deny the fact that she comes to help when I need since I have no inlaws but just because she knows that we need her she will try to dominate over us. One example is that when my child was 10 months i got a potty seat and she never let me put my kid on it saying that kid is too young and because of this my kid never sat in toilet till he turned 4 years. Another is that she used to feed my son only biscuits all the time even when I used to oppose. Also, once she fed my son ice cream when he was 1 year old and my child developed fever next day and she put blame on me saying I took him our for walk in the evening hence my child got fever. When I used silicon brush to brush my kids teeth she stopped me saying there's no need to brush before 1 month when i objected and continued doing it she blamed .e whenever my kid cried saying that his gums are hurting because you brushed his teeth. Many more such incidents where she puts blame on me and tries to prove me wrong She will almost daily try n tell me that my husband is blaming her for groceries getting over/ equipment not working etc which I know my husband does not (he is very kind hearted ) and she just keeps all this misunderstanding in her head. Many times I've clarified by talking to both of them together. Now, my husband is going out of town and again my mother will be coming. I'm fed-up of these fights n arguments but when in emergency i have to rely on her but she takes full advantage of the fact that I need her. I can't take this anymore and its affecting my mental health

Ans: Dear Leena,
I hear you!
But do allow me to give you a perspective. Relationships are never easy to maintain and manage as they involve emotions and layers through it all. Mothers can at times see their daughters as people who they need to groom for life. It's possible that your mother is doing the same thing. She has made it her sole responsibility to continue to groom you so that you earn a good name in your husband's household. This isn't me saying it, it's the way age-old beliefs could be seeping through your mother.
Now, it has become an interference and it must be conveyed to her. At first, it will hurt her and she might react to it by reminding you of all the sacrifices that she has made in order to raise you; but mind you, be steady in what you convey.
She will eventually understand that her daughter does not need to be monitored and taught to lead her life, but just needs a support system around her. Of course, there might be a withdrawal when she has to help you, but be firm on how you would like be treated from now on.
Polite yet firm is something that works well to avoid conflicts within relationships; so use that well.
Also, the differentiation between you and your brother might just be that she gives you tough love. Tough love is shown by a parent/authority figure to another in order to toughen the other person up and in severe cases it may result in submissiveness. In your case, it is likely that she has a certain belief on how boys and girls must be raised. It will change only when she changes her belief. For now, focus on creating a better environment at home by taking charge and being polite and firm with your mother.
And do know, at the end of the day, she is a mother....love sets everything right.
All the best!

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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 18, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 17, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
I am from Middle class family. Our parents, 2 brothers, my sister and Me.My Father is no more and my mom lives alone. She does not want to stay with any of us. We all live out of country and my mother lives in India. My mother is not dependent on us financially and she can manage on her own and does not expect money from any of us. She is getting old and we need to take care of her, but I feel I am only one who checks on her and arranges for any small things she needs. My sibling don't even talk about it, I feel they think if they talk about it then they have do something. Like every other old person my mother and me have a lot of differences on everything like managing finances, or renewing something or going to hospital etc and I become the bad person because of these matters. My siblings don't get involved they just call her once a while and talk for while and manage to stay in her good books. I know that it is my duty to take care of her but I feel not appreciated or rejected when she ignores all the things I do for her when others don't. She is also old school and favors boys over girls and reject me saying that I am from a different family and always guilt traps me saying that she educated me but i earn and spent on my husband family. She hates my in-laws, but they are nice people and my husband is very supportive. Since it is my mother I don't tell these issues to anyone even my husband and it is destroying my Peace.
Ans: I'm sorry to hear about the difficulties you're facing in your relationship with your mother. It can be challenging when there are differences in opinions and expectations, especially when it comes to caregiving and managing family dynamics. Here are a few suggestions that might help you navigate this situation:

Communication: It's important to have open and honest communication with your mother. Try to express your feelings calmly and respectfully, and listen to her perspective as well. Sharing your concerns and thoughts can help create a better understanding between both of you.

Seek support: While you may not want to burden your husband with these issues, it's still essential to have someone to talk to and seek support from. Consider confiding in a close friend or a counselor who can provide an objective viewpoint and offer guidance on how to cope with the emotional stress.

Boundaries: Establishing boundaries is crucial in any relationship. Make it clear to your mother what you can and cannot do, taking into account your own personal and family commitments. It's important to find a balance between caring for her and taking care of yourself and your own family.

Sibling involvement: If you feel overwhelmed and alone in taking care of your mother, you can try to involve your siblings more actively in the process. Have an open conversation with them, express your concerns, and see if they can contribute in any way, whether it's by providing emotional support or assisting with certain responsibilities.

Patience and empathy: Understand that your mother's behavior and expectations may be influenced by her upbringing, cultural beliefs, and personal experiences. Try to approach situations with empathy, even if it's challenging. Remember that she may be experiencing her own struggles and fears as she grows older.

Self-care: Taking care of your own well-being is essential. Ensure that you make time for yourself, engage in activities that bring you joy, and maintain a healthy work-life balance. By taking care of yourself, you'll be better equipped to handle the challenges that arise in your relationship with your mother.

Remember, it's normal to feel frustrated and emotionally drained in such situations. However, with patience, understanding, and effective communication, you may be able to improve your relationship with your mother and find a balance that works for both of you.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1745 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

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Relationship
Hi Anu, Im 27yrs old. I have been married for 1.5 yrs. Me and my husband live abroad. I grew up abroad for a great deal of my life and all members of my family are post graduate degree holders from renowned universities. Recently my mother-in-law came to visit us, she is staying for 6 months. My husband prior to marriage said that his mother is educated when I asked him. Post marriage I found out she studied only till 10th and married my father-in-law who is deceased. Since her arrival, my mother-in-law’s behaviour has been very weird. 1. She once told me that in their caste Kshatriyas ( we had an inter-caste marriage) its very common for the men to have 2 wives and mistresses. This was said totally out if context. Couple of days later she mentioned that her husband had a mistress. 2. She asks me questions about why things are the way they are and why are they like that. I find it very difficult to answer to her questions at the same time I don’t want to sound condescending. 3. She complained to my mother that my husband and I are using up too much ghee and oil. She blames that I made her son fat. My husband likes to have everything deep fried when I don’t do as he asks he throws a fit like a child and refuses to eat. Now I realised why, she deep fries almost everything, bhindi, potato, gobi, arvi, and even brinjal. 4. She also mentions that some relative of their was going to give then 2kg gold dowry to marry her son. I asked her why didn’t she accept it then. They she covered up saying that our engagement was already done by then. Again recently, she was talking to her sister on the phone and was saying that a girl is really beautiful and she was considering her for my husband but he liked me. All while I was literally in front of her. 5. She tries to take over the kitchen, she wants to wash dishes by hand and there is food residue all over. She doesn't want me to use the dishwasher. When I pointedly out that there is residue all dried up on the mixer blade, she covered it up saying that its powder. 6. I asked her not to put oil or ghee on the roti pan when making rotis as its ruining the pan and to ghee after the roti is cooked. She still went ahead and melted butter and poured it on the pan and made rotis. She said that they are not puffing up without the oil. I tried it out myself and I discovered that she lied. Dishonesty is my biggest peeve. I have no respect for her now. I don’t understand why she behaves the way she does. She also expects me to listen to all her stories and express interest in her superstitions. She on the other hand shows total disregard to what I say. My parents want me to be nice to her as she is a widow and has only her son and daughter. She is not nice to her daughter. My sister in law does not want to live with her in laws and my mother-in-laws laughs when she calls her crying. I have witnessed her gas lighting her daughter on many occasions. Once my husband asked her is the sister can come stay at home with her back in India and my mother-in-law said that she does not want her daughter in the house because she is a burden. My mother in law also keeps telling me that I should press her son’s legs as it will give Lakshmi. Once he took food from my plate I told him to put it back and get his own, she said its a Maha paap to snatch from husband’s mouth. She uses this Mahapaap whenever I ask my husband to help around the house. I don’t know how to communicate this with my husband and how to deal with her. He believes he needs to provide everything his mom wants and give her the world because she went thru difficulties after their dad’s passing. However my mother in law believes her life got better after her husband’s passing. She says that her husband was abusive to her physically, emotionally and financially. What do I do?
Ans: Dear DD,
Some space is necessary to be away from people who display less empathy. It keeps the relationship healthier.
You will usually find me guiding people towards one another first BUT at times maintaining a healthy distance can save relationships. Your mother-in-law can become the cause for stress within your marriage as you will have no one to take your complaints to other than your husband. He is obviously not going to take it that easily...
Also the fact that your mother-in-law herself hasn't held a steady marriage is going to be a constant source of more stresses as she is very likely to expect special treatment from her son and you.
She needs to work on her mind and that's too much to expect of her. It's wise to keep some distance and over time, she may wish to re-build relationships with everyone and live in harmony.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1745 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 29, 2024

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This pertains to my parents. I got married at the age of 30 about 18 years ago and have a dear and loving spouse who believed in contributing to our home and didn't wish to be a home maker. Since we were living in a joint family, my father wanted only us to spend for the full house without much/negligible contribution. My elder brother's spouse is from a well to do family and they started to live independently from the beginning of their marriage. In spite of running the total household expenses, we have from the beginning learnt to save and we planned many vacation trips, overseas and domestic alike. My mother could not and till date cannot appreciate the fact that only the 2 of us are holidaying and she wanted to be part of our holidays which we have vehemently denied as that was a me-time for both of us. She has held this sourness against us although this comes out in her discussion occasionally. In spite of living together and addressing all needs of my elderly parents, my mother is perpetually complaining about not doing enough. I have tried to leave home and separate out as 2-3 times the fight with her had gone out of bounds because of her behaving un-reasonably weird. At times she takes care of all of us and at times she speaks so bitter about me and my wife, it is had to understand if it was the same person. My father has been a quiet individual and he has no opinions on anyone and will not side with anyone, neither will he call out any wrongdoing & there is no point in talking to him as his only objective is to have a peaceful life and have 3 meals a day without caring about anyone else in the world. 9 years ago i was laid off and i was almost compelled to start a real estate business with my father, this work requires mental and physical dedication which i have put and established myself in a respectable stage. Since the beginning my father had wanted to only take the accounting bit of the business as his responsibility as he does not know anything else. He has not let me look at accounts ever and he kind of pays me a salary whatever he deems fit at the end of the month, he also retains a large chunk with him and pays mom to run the house from the business. Although he has no travel, not going out of home, and no friends, he still needs the money for which he has not described or spoken when asked, mom and i suspect he is funding another family at our expense but we are not sure, as he has maintained a secret life for his entire life. 6 months ago me and my wife purchased a home and shifted and even now his approach towards my family needs is nonchalant as he keeps the major pie of the business income regardless of not putting any effort or work. At one end there is my mother who has demands all the time, at the other end my father is almost stealing from me without any justification or clarification. Somehow both of us are living separate and managing a peaceful life with very little which remains after servicing all Emi's and plus we also manage to contribute little to my father in law for running his household. Both of us seem to be burned out as our close ones only think of us only when money is required. Sometimes i feel i should shut shop and do something else, i also upscaled myself by clearing MBA at the age of 45 during covid so that some employer may consider me worthy and in spite of applying to 450+ job openings no one considers my resume to be appropriate. My wife is employed in a senior managerial position with a mnc and both of us fear that in 10 years time we will have nothing left with us and no one to take care of ourselves. Its frustrating as there seems no path forward, can u suggest anything ?
Ans: Dear RERA,
Living in a separate home in your case would have to mean that you keep your finances separately as well.
Your older brother must pitch in as well for parents; so please have that chat with him. There's no point in playing a martyr and then worry about being taken advantage of. When you say YES, when you actually want to say NO, is the beginning of a whole lot of issues which is what has happened...
So, now rewind and start clearing things one by one. Start by talking to your brother who will also need to contribute towards parents. Next, what your father does with that money is something you may never know; what you can do is CAP the amount so that he does not think that he has a perennial source of money. Kindly go on more trips with your wife so that your mother gets used to this fact. Plan trips at least once a year with the entire family which is where your mother will also enjoy and understand that she is not being ignored but actually cared for.
Plan your life with your spouse and make decisions that are financially prudent as you need to take care of yourselves as well.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1745 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 23, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 22, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello Sir/Madam. I am 42 years old, married with two children. I live with my single mother, who is 74 years old, in her house. My brother, who is 48 years old, lives separately with his family about 10 kilometers away. Whenever my mother is hospitalized, sick, or in need of any support, my brother and sister-in-law neither assist us financially nor with their physical presence. They provide numerous excuses for not helping. Only after much family persuasion does my brother agree to help. My wife and I are the only ones who support my mother financially and physically whenever needed. Conversely, my mother and I have always supported my brother financially and physically whenever required. My mother does not like staying with my brother and sister-in-law. However, she maintains a good relationship with them as they do not retaliate against her. My mother often interferes with our eating habits, especially regarding our weekend outings for leisure or movies. When I wanted to renovate the kitchen in my newly purchased house, she strongly objected. My mother insists that her opinion matters; otherwise, there is no point in having a relationship among us. Sometimes, she even imposes my brother and sister-in-law’s suggestions on us. Whenever I oppose her views, it irritates her, and we start quarreling. My mother then curses us, saying that if her suggestions are not implemented, it will cause trouble for us in the future. It often ends with her saying that she is dead to us and wants to end our relationship. We reconcile after a long time. Hence, we sometimes feel that our freedom is restricted. I tried to explain to my mother that a true relationship is one where prompt support is provided when needed, not when someone opposes her views. I feel that instead of talking about breaking the relationship with me during our fights, my mother should discuss breaking the relationship with my brother and sister-in-law, and I have often discussed this with her. But my mother does not seem to understand and feels that she needs to fulfill her duties as a mother. I am planning to relocate to my own house next year, which is about 60 kilometers away. I have decided to break my relationship with my brother and sister-in-law as I do not want any superficial relationship. Please help as I am tired of quarreling with my mother.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
So, you find it easier to abandon your family because your brother and sister-in-law don't pitch in, your mother is interfering, your mother according to you should break ties with her other child!
Do you not sense the weight of expectations is the one actually ruining your peace of mind and hence your relationships? Yes, of course, your sibling can pitch in more; did it not occur to you that you can talk to him and his wife and actually request them to be more hands-on?
And why should your mother break ties with your brother? Is that the way you will feel validated by her OR that will show you that she recognizes what you do for her?
Do remember, never do anything for anyone (within relationships) with an expectation that you will get something in return. Selflessness is what will ensure that you have better quality relationships.
If you feel at some point that you are being taken for granted, then say so and set things right. Indulging in this kind of 'demand' that things must be a particular way is not going to happen especially when you come from a space where the ultimate deed is breaking relationships.
It takes one impulsive move to break relationships, so tread carefully, keep your emotions away from fueling your expectations and it will actually let see things for what they truly are. This will enable you take the next steps in a very meaningful way where no bridges are burned.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |645 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 23, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 10, 2025
Relationship
Hi Mam, I am a south indian married to marathi. It's been over 14 years of marriage with a 3 year old son. After marriage, we stayed away from in law's for 8 to 9 years. During Covid, we shifted back to my in laws place. Things were okay for few months but then my MIL started creating issues ....small issues wherein there was no mistake of mine. Then Covid 2nd wave happened. I lost my younger sister and father to Covid. At that time my husband supported me a lot but my MIL was constantly taunting me that I am only crying and not doing any household work. To carry on my routine, I found a job WFH. But due to WFH, she always used to disturb me and ask to do house hold chores which led to me getting stressed and couldn't focus on work. I became pregnant and she started behaving weirdly Things fell apart, me and my husband rented an apartment nearby and stayed and we managed my pregnancy and childbirth and child caring all on by our own. 2 years back, my FIL suddenly passed away, which means we had to shift back again to stay with MIL. In the beginning I thought things will change, but she is started behaving more weirdly. I ignored it. She expects me to do everything for her and doesn't even allow me to keep a maid whereas I was living comfortable life when we were living separately. I am taking classes from home and its difficult to manage everything as I work about 8 hours a day, plus take care of my child plus do household chores. Mu husband will not stay separately because she is alone now. She expects me to do everything but if i talk in my language with my son, she doesn't like it. Last week she told me don't teach him your language, I hate your language and we didn't want you, you only came in our life. Hearing this I felt really bad. I lost my mother at an early age to cancer, I lost my father and sister to Covid This is how she behaves with me. I cannot call or talk to anyone about this and I am getting frustrated. I feel teaching my language and culture is the only connect i have with my mother and my family and she is not allowing me to do that My husband is supportive but currently he is having some stress at Work so I don't want to talk to him about this. Please help
Ans: This situation is not sustainable. You are burning out, emotionally and physically. You may need to have a clear, calm, but firm conversation with your husband soon. Let him know that you are not trying to hurt anyone or run away from responsibility. You’re asking for basic respect and the emotional space to breathe, to live as an equal in your own home.

If moving out again isn't possible immediately, then set some boundaries inside the home. Claim time and space that are yours, especially when you're working. Re-establish your right to speak your language, to teach your child your culture. It’s not just your right—it’s his heritage.

You are not wrong to want peace, and you're not selfish for needing help. You’re a daughter, a mother, a wife—and you're also a woman who deserves compassion, support, and room to live without apology. Please don’t carry this silently any longer. If not with friends or family, consider talking to a counselor online. You’ve carried too much on your own already. It’s time to ask for space, for support—and for healing.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |10852 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Dec 07, 2025

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Hello, I’m a student who recently joined the Integrated M.Sc Physics program at Amrita University. I’m aiming for a strong academic foundation and a clear career path. Could you please guide me on the following: How good is this course for research careers or higher studies (IISc, IITs, abroad)? What are the placement prospects after Integrated M.Sc Physics at Amrita? Does the program help in preparing for alternate options like UPSC, CDS/AFCAT, or technical roles? What skills (coding, research projects, certifications) should I start early to make the most of this degree?
Ans: Sree, Program Overview and Academic Foundation: Congratulations on joining the Integrated M.Sc Physics program at Amrita University. This five-year integrated program represents a rigorous pathway designed to equip you with advanced theoretical and experimental physics knowledge combined with cutting-edge scientific computing skills. The curriculum uniquely integrates a minor in Scientific Computing, which adds substantial computational capability to your profile—a critical advantage in today's research and professional landscape. The program incorporates comprehensive coursework spanning classical mechanics, electromagnetism, quantum mechanics, statistical physics, advanced laboratory work, and specialized topics in materials physics, optoelectronics, and computational methods, positioning you excellently for both research and professional careers.
Research Career Prospects: IISc, IITs, and Beyond: For research-oriented careers, the Integrated M.Sc Physics program at Amrita provides an exceptional foundation. Amrita's curriculum specifically aligns with GATE and UGC-NET examination syllabi, and the institution emphasizes early research engagement. The faculty at Amrita actively publish research in Scopus-indexed journals, with over 60 publications in international venues within the past five years, exposing you to active research environments.
To pursue research at premier institutions like IISc, you would typically follow the PhD pathway. IISc accepts M.Sc graduates through their Integrated PhD programs, and with your Amrita M.Sc, you're eligible to apply. You'll need to qualify the relevant entrance examinations, and your integrated program's emphasis on research fundamentals provides strong preparation. The final year of your Integrated M.Sc is intentionally structured to be nearly free of classroom commitments, enabling engagement with research projects at institutes like IISc, IITs, and National Labs. According to Amrita's data, over 80% of M.Sc Physics students secured internship offers from reputed institutions during academic year 2019-20, directly facilitating research career transitions.
Placement and Direct Employment Opportunities: Amrita University boasts a comprehensive placement ecosystem with strong corporate and government sector connections. According to NIRF placement data for the Amrita Integrated M.Sc program (5-year), the median salary in 2023-24 stood at ?7.2 LPA with approximately 57% placement rate. However, these figures reflect general placement trends; physics graduates often secure higher packages in specialized technical roles. Many graduates join software companies like Infosys (with early offers), Google, and PayPal, where their strong analytical and computational skills command competitive compensation packages ranging from ?8-15 LPA for entry-level positions.
The Department of Corporate and Industrial Relations at Amrita provides intensive three-semester life skills training covering linguistic competence, data interpretation, group discussions, and interview techniques. This structured placement support significantly enhances your employability in both government and private sectors.
Government Sector Opportunities: UPSC, BARC, DRDO, and ISRO: Your M.Sc Physics degree opens multiple avenues for prestigious government employment. UPSC Geophysicist examinations explicitly list M.Sc Physics or Applied Physics as qualifying degrees, enabling you to compete for Group A positions in the Geological Survey of India and Central Ground Water Board. The age limit for geophysicist positions is 32 years (with relaxation for reserved categories), and the exam comprises preliminary, main, and interview stages.
BARC (Bhabha Atomic Research Centre) actively recruits M.Sc Physics graduates as Scientific Officers and Research Fellows. Recruitment occurs through the BARC Online Test or GATE scores, with positions in nuclear science, radiation protection, and atomic research. BARC Summer Internship programs are available, offering ?5,000-?10,000 monthly stipends with opportunity for future scientist recruitment.
DRDO (Defense Research and Development Organization) recruits M.Sc Physics graduates through CEPTAM examinations or GATE scores for roles involving defense technology, weapon systems, and laser physics research. ISRO (Indian Space Research Organisation) regularly advertises scientist/engineer positions through competitive recruitment for candidates with strong physics backgrounds, offering opportunities in satellite technology and space science applications.
Other significant employers include the Indian Meteorological Department (IMD) recruiting as scientific officers, and NPCIL (Nuclear Power Corporation of India Limited), offering stable government service with competitive compensation packages exceeding ?8-12 LPA for scientists.
Alternate Career Pathways: UPSC, CDS, and AFCAT: UPSC Civil Services (IFS - Indian Forest Service): M.Sc Physics graduates qualify for UPSC Civil Services examinations, with the forest service offering opportunities for science-based administrative roles with potential to reach senior government positions.
CDS/AFCAT (Armed Forces): While AFCAT meteorology branches specifically require "B.Sc with Maths & Physics with 60% minimum marks," the technical branches (Aeronautical Engineering and Ground Duty Technical roles) require graduation/integrated postgraduation in Engineering/Technology. An M.Sc Physics integrates well with technical qualifications, though you would need engineering background for direct officer entry. However, you remain eligible for specialized technical interviews if applying through alternate defence channels.
UGC-NET Examination: This pathway leads to Assistant Professor positions in central universities and colleges across India. NET-qualified candidates receive scholarships of ?31,000/month for 2-year JRF positions with PhD pursuit, transitioning to Assistant Professor salaries of ?41,000/month in government institutions. This route provides long-term academic career security with research opportunities.
Private Sector Technical Roles
M.Sc Physics graduates are increasingly valued in data science, software engineering, and technical consulting. Companies actively recruit physics graduates for software development, where strong problem-solving and logical reasoning translate to competitive packages of ?10-20 LPA. Specialized domains including quantum computing development, financial modeling, and scientific computing offer premium compensation. Your minor in Scientific Computing makes you particularly attractive to technology companies requiring computational expertise.
International Opportunities and Higher Studies Abroad
An M.Sc from Amrita facilitates admission to PhD programs at international institutions. German universities offer tuition-free or low-fee MSc Physics programs (2 years) with scholarships like DAAD providing €850+ monthly stipends. US universities accept M.Sc graduates directly for PhD positions with full funding (tuition coverage + stipend). These pathways require GRE scores and strong Statement of Purpose articulating research interests. Research collaboration opportunities exist with Max Planck Institute (Germany) and CalTech Summer Research Program (USA), both welcoming Indian M.Sc students.
Essential Skills and Certifications to Develop Immediately: Programming Languages: Start learning Python immediately—it's universally used in research and industry. Dedicate 2-3 hours weekly to data analysis, scientific computing libraries (NumPy, SciPy, Pandas), and machine learning fundamentals. MATLAB is equally critical for physics applications, particularly numerical simulations and data visualization. Aim to complete MATLAB certification courses within your first year.
Research Tools: Learn Git/version control, LaTeX for scientific documentation, and data analysis frameworks. These skills are indispensable for publishing research papers and collaborating on projects.
Certifications Worth Pursuing: (1) MATLAB Certification (DIYguru or MathWorks official courses) (2) Python for Data Science (complete certificate programs from platforms like Coursera) (3) Machine Learning Fundamentals (for expanding technical versatility) & (4) Scientific Communication and Technical Writing (develop through departmental workshops)
Strategic Internship Planning: Leverage Amrita's research connections systematically. In your third year, apply to BARC Summer Internship, IISER Internships, TIFR Summer Fellowships, and IIT Internship programs (like IIT Kanpur SURGE). These expose you to frontier research while establishing connections for future PhD or scientist recruitment. Target 2-3 research internships across different specializations to develop versatility.

TO SUM UP, Your Integrated M.Sc Physics degree from Amrita positions you exceptionally well for competitive research careers at IISc/IITs, prestigious government scientist roles at BARC/DRDO/ISRO, and international PhD opportunities. The program's scientific computing emphasis differentiates you in the job market. Immediate priorities: (1) Master Python and MATLAB within the first two years; (2) Engage in research projects starting year 2-3; (3) Target internships at premiere research institutions; (4) Prepare GATE while completing your degree for maximum flexibility in recruitment; (5) Consider UGC-NET for long-term academic stability. Your career trajectory will ultimately depend on developing strong research fundamentals, demonstrating consistent excellence in specialization areas, and strategically selecting internship and research opportunities. The rigorous Amrita program combined with disciplined skill development positions you for exceptional career success across multiple sectors. Choose the most suitable option for you out of the various options available mentioned above. All the BEST for Your Prosperous Future!

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Asked on - Dec 07, 2025 | Answered on Dec 07, 2025
Thankyou
Ans: Welcome Sree.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10872 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 06, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 06, 2025Hindi
Money
Dear Sir/Ma'am, I need some guidance and advice for continuing my mutual fund investments. I am a 36 year old male, married, no kids yet and no debts/liabilities as such. I have couple of savings in PPF, NPS, Emergency funds and long term investing in direct stocks. I recently started below mentioned SIPs for long term to grow wealth. Request you to review the same and let me know if I should continue with the SIPs or need to rationalize. Kindly also advice on how to invest a lumpsum amount of around 6lacs. invesco small cap 2000 motilal oswal midcap 2700 parag parikh flexicap 3000 HDFC flexicap 3100 ICICI prudential largecap 3100 HDFC large and midcap 3100 HDFC gold etf FOF 2000 ICICI Pru equity and debt fund 3000 HDFC balanced advantage fund 3000 nippon india silver etf FOF 2000
Ans: You already built a solid foundation. Many investors delay planning. But you started early at 36. That gives you a strong advantage. You have no liabilities. You have long term thinking. You also have diversified savings like PPF, NPS, Emergency funds and direct stocks. That shows clarity and discipline. This approach builds wealth with less stress over time.

You also started systematic investments in equity funds. That is a positive step. Your selection covers multiple categories like large cap, mid cap, small cap, flexi cap, hybrid and precious metals. So the intent is right. You are trying to create a broad portfolio. That gives balance.

» Your Portfolio Composition Understanding
Your current SIP list includes:

Small cap

Mid cap

Flexi cap

Large cap

Large and mid cap

Hybrid category

Gold and Silver FoF

Equity and Debt allocation fund

Dynamic hybrid fund

This shows you are trying to cover many segments. But too many categories can create overlap. When there is overlap, you get confusion during review. It also makes portfolio discipline difficult. You may think you are diversified. But the holdings inside may repeat. That reduces efficiency.

Your portfolio now looks like:

Equity dominant

Hybrid for stability

Metals for hedge

So the broad direction is fine. But simplifying helps in long-term habit building.

» Fund Category Duplication
You hold:

Two flexi cap funds

One large and mid cap fund

One pure large cap fund

One mid cap fund

One small cap fund

Flexi cap funds already invest across large, mid, small. Then large and mid also overlaps. So the large cap exposure gets repeated. That may not add extra benefit. But it increases monitoring complexity.

So I suggest rationalising. Keep one fund per category in core. Keep satellite space for only high conviction.

» Core and Satellite Strategy
A structured portfolio follows core and satellite method.

Core portfolio should be:

Simple

Long term

Stable

Satellite portfolio can be:

High growth

Concentrated

Based on your thinking level, you can structure like this:

Core funds:

One large cap

One flexi cap

One hybrid equity and debt fund

One balanced advantage type fund

Satellite funds:

One mid cap

One small cap

One metal allocation if needed

This division gives clarity. You can continue SIPs with review every year. No need to stop and restart often. That reduces behavioural mistakes.

» Your Current SIP List Review with Suggested Streamlining

You can consider continuing:

One flexi cap

One large cap

One mid cap

One small cap

One balanced advantage

One equity and debt hybrid

You may reconsider keeping both flexi caps and both gold silver funds. One of each category is enough. Because too many funds do not increase returns. It complicates tracking.

Precious metal funds should not be more than 5 to 7 percent in your portfolio. This is because metals are hedge assets. They do not create compounding like equity. They act as protection during cycles. So keep them small.

» How to Use the Rs 6 Lakh Lump Sum
You asked about lump sum investing. This is important. Lump sum should not go fully into equity at one time. Markets move in cycles. So use a staggered method. You can invest the lump sum through STP (Systematic Transfer Plan). You can keep the amount in a liquid fund and set STP toward your chosen growth funds over 6 to 12 months.

This reduces timing risk. It also creates discipline. So your Rs 6 lakh can be deployed gradually. You may use 50% towards core equity funds and 30% toward satellite growth category. The remaining 20% can go into hybrid category. This gives balance and comfort.

» Regular Funds Over Direct Funds
One important point many investors miss. Direct funds look cheaper. But they demand deep knowledge, discipline, and behaviour control. Most investors lose more through emotional selling and wrong timing than they save on expense ratio.

With regular funds through a Mutual Fund Distributor with Certified Financial Planner qualification, you get guidance, structure and correction. The advisory discipline protects you during market extremes. That is more valuable than a small saving in expense ratio.

A personalised planner also tracks portfolio drift, rebalancing need and category shifts. So regular fund investing gives long-term benefit and behaviour coaching.

» Actively Managed Funds over Index or ETF
Some investors choose index funds or ETF thinking they are simple and cheap. But they ignore drawbacks.

Index funds or ETF will not avoid weak companies in the index. They will invest whether the company grows or struggles. There is no fund manager decision making. So when markets are at peak, index funds continue aggressive exposure. In downturns also they fall fully. There is no cushion.

Actively managed funds work with research teams. They can avoid bad sectors. They can shift allocation based on market and economy. Over long term, this gives better alpha and stability. So continuing with actively managed funds creates better wealth compounding.

» SIP Continuation Strategy
Once the rationalisation is done, continue SIPs every month without interruption. Pause and restart behaviour damages compounding power. SIP works best when you go through all market cycles. You benefit more during corrections because cost averaging works.

So continue SIP amount. You can also review SIP increase every year based on income. Increasing SIP by 10 to 15 percent every year helps you reach large corpus faster.

» Asset Allocation Based Approach
One key point in wealth creation is having the right asset mix. Equity gives growth. Hybrid gives balance. Metals give hedge. Debt gives safety. Your asset allocation should stay aligned to your risk profile and time horizon.

Since you are young and have long term horizon, higher equity allocation is fine. But as time moves, rebalancing is important. Rebalancing protects gains and restores allocation.

So review your asset allocation every year or during major life events like child birth, home buying or retirement planning.

» Behaviour Management
Many portfolios fail not due to bad funds. They fail due to bad decisions. Selling during correction. Stopping SIP when market falls. Chasing past return performance. These mistakes reduce wealth.

Your discipline so far is good. Continue to stay patient during volatility. Equity rewards patience and time.

» Financial Goals Clarity
Since you have no children now, you can decide your long-term goals. Typical goals may include:

Retirement

Future child education

Dream lifestyle purchase

Health care reserves

When goals are clear, investment purpose becomes stronger. So you can map each fund category to goal horizon. Short-term goals should not use equity. Long-term goals should use equity with hybrid support.

» Role of Review and Monitoring
Review once in a year is enough. Frequent review can create anxiety. Annual review helps check:

Fund performance

Expense drift

Category relevance

Allocation balance

Then adjust only if needed. This progress helps you stay confident and aligned.

» Taxation Awareness
Equity mutual funds taxation rules are:

Short term (below one year holding) taxable at 20 percent

Long term (above one year holding) gains above Rs 1.25 lakh taxable at 12.5 percent

Debt mutual funds are taxed as per your income slab.

So always hold equity funds for long term. That reduces tax impact and gives better growth.

» SIP Increase Plan
You can create a simple plan to increase SIP over time. For example:

Increase SIP at every salary increment

Increase SIP during bonus time

Use rewards or extra income for investing

This habit accelerates wealth. So by the time you reach 45 to 50 years, your investments could reach a strong level.

» Insurance and Protection
Before investing large, ensure you have term insurance and health insurance. If not already done, it is important. Insurance protects wealth. Without insurance, even a small medical event can impact investment plan. So review this part also. Since you are married, cover both.

» Wealth Behaviour Mindset
You are already disciplined. Just keep these simple principles:

Invest without stopping

Review once a year

Avoid funds overlap

Follow asset allocation

Avoid reacting to media noise

This helps you reach long term milestones.

» Finally
You are on the right track. Only fine tuning and simplification is needed. Your discipline is visible. Your portfolio will grow well with structure, patience and periodic review. Use the Rs 6 lakh with STP approach. And continue SIP with rationalised categories.

With time and consistency, wealth creation becomes effortless and peaceful. You just need to stay committed and avoid overthinking during market movements.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Dr Dipankar

Dr Dipankar Dutta  |1837 Answers  |Ask -

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Dec 05, 2025

Career
Dear Sir, I did my BTech from a normal engineering college not very famous. The teaching was not great and hence i did not study well. I tried my best to learn coding including all the technologies like html,css,javascript,react js,dba,php because i wanted to be a web developer But nothing seem to enter my head except html and css. I don't understand a language which has more complexities. Is it because of my lack of experience or not devoting enough time. I am not sure. I did many courses online and tried to do diplomas also abroad which i passed somehow. I recently joined android development course because i like apps but the teaching was so fast that i could not memorize anything. There was no time to even take notes down. During the course i did assignments and understood the code because i have to pass but after the course is over i tend to forget everything. I attempted a lot of interviews. Some of them i even got but could not perform well so they let me go. Now due to the AI booming and job markets in a bad shape i am re-thinking whether to keep studying or whether its just time waste. Since 3 years i am doing labour type of jobs which does not yield anything to me for survival and to pay my expenses. I have the quest to learn everything but as soon as i sit in front of the computer i listen to music or read something else. What should i do to stay more focused? What should i do to make myself believe confident. Is there still scope of IT in todays world? Kindly advise.
Ans: Your story does not show failure.
It shows persistence, effort, and desire to improve.

Most people give up.
You didn’t.
That means you will succeed — but with the right method, not the old one.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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