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Interfaith Relationship: How Can I Help My Boyfriend Talk to His Angry, Conservative Mother?

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |609 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jul 23, 2024

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Asked by Anonymous - Jun 25, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

my bf wants to talk to his very complicated and angry mother about our relationship. for context, she is from a very conservative rajasthani background. his father already rejected our relationship. please give some tips on how to proceed. i belong to a different background. i come from a very liberal family whereas he does not. what to do? he cannot go against his family at all

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

This one is on him. You can only support him while he tries to convince his parents. And if at all he can’t, please consider if you are willing to go against their wishes and if you will be able to adjust to such a conservative family. Please consider everything before making any effort.

Best Wishes.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |615 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 21, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 26, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi mam/sir, I am 24 independent girl living in Bangalore. I come from a middle class family, with lot of past issues. My parents have horrible relationship; my father has never supported us in our education. My mother has only been there for us. My mother’s family has also supported us alot. I have a boyfriend for 4 years, he is well settled and educated person. I told my mother about him 2 years back. But my mother is not flinching at all, she is very firm that she will never agree to this as the boy is from another caste. She also says her parents i.e my grandparents will stop talking to us, their reaction will be horrifying. This I am also aware a little bit, my family is extremely conservative and no one in my family has ever done love marriage. I have slowly started to gather somd strength nd told my few cousins & aunt. They all suggestive me to forget this guy, as our family will never agree to it. I do not know how to proceed. This person is amazing & i am sure about him. On the other hand my mother has been constantly taunting me for this; but i am grateful to her for all her support till date. And the worst part - this alliance can only be finalised when my grandparents agree to it. Neither me nor my mother has guts to talk to them about it.
Ans: our mother’s strong opposition, driven by deeply ingrained beliefs and fear of societal backlash, makes it even harder. It’s understandable that she feels bound by her family’s expectations, and the thought of confronting your grandparents is overwhelming for both of you.

The fact that she has been constantly taunting you about this must be emotionally draining. At the same time, you feel grateful for all the support she has given you throughout your life, which makes this even more complicated. Your extended family reinforcing her stance adds to your struggle, making you feel like you have no one on your side.

You have already taken a big step by standing your ground, despite the pressure. Right now, the best approach might be to gradually help your mother see your boyfriend as a person, beyond just his caste. Instead of forcing the conversation toward marriage immediately, you could try introducing him in a way that feels natural—talking about his achievements, his values, and how he has supported you. Over time, she may begin to see him in a different light.

Since your grandparents hold the final say in family matters, their reaction is something you’re dreading. You know they will be resistant, and the thought of confronting them feels almost impossible. But at some point, the conversation will have to happen. It might help to find an ally within your family, someone who could support your case when the time comes. Is there anyone who has even slightly modern views or who understands you better? If there is, getting their support could make a huge difference.

While you navigate all of this, it’s important to remind yourself that this is your life. Your happiness matters, and while family approval is important, so is your personal choice. If they remain rigid despite your efforts, you may have to prepare yourself for tough decisions. The question you may need to ask yourself is how much time you’re willing to wait and what you would do if they never agree. If your boyfriend’s family is supportive, that could be a source of strength for you.

This is not an easy path, but if you believe in your relationship, standing by it with patience and persistence may eventually lead to a solution.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1639 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 21, 2024

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Relationship
Hello Ma'am, I will be explaining my problem in detail. I sincerely appreciate your previous answer. As suggested, I spoke with my boyfriend about the apprehensions from my parents regarding cultural difference. He resolved many things . To be honest, what I mean by cultural difference is that I am from a Brahmin family who has been living in 'not so traditional' way. My parents are into the service class and are well educated. On the other hand, my boyfriend belongs to the merchant or 'Baniya' community and his father is a grocery shop owner and his mother is a housewife. Although they are decent people who do not put much restrictions. The reason my family is opposing this marriage even after resolving the apprehensions with my boyfriend is firstly his family background . My mother worries as to how she will introduce his family to our extended relatives and acquaintance. Adding to the problem, my boyfriend is 1.5 inches shorter than me. Now this is also a prime cause for major opposition from my family towards marrying my boyfriend. My mother explains this problem but I told her that these things do not matter . Could you please suggest me what to do now ? My boyfriend is an extremely loving person, who respects me and more than me he respects my family. Even after these problems he is ready to support me and wait for me
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You have said this:
My boyfriend is an extremely loving person, who respects me and more than me he respects my family. Even after these problems he is ready to support me and wait for me...
What more do you want?
Like I have already suggested, plan for how the two of you are going to face challenges when they arise and how you plan on working on differences that stem within the marriage due to culture and other values. Kindly refer to my first response to you...you will find suggestions there.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1639 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 25, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 19, 2025Hindi
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I 29(F) from scheduled caste and 28(M) from OBC started dating 3 years ago. I had already seen a big family drama during my sister’s inter caste marriage but it turned out to be successful. I never hid my identity in front of the guy and specifically talked about it very early in the relationship in order to not have any issue later. The guy was extremely okay with it. More than one year into dating we told our parents about the relationship and both sides seemed fine with it. And we were happy. However, last year his parents completely flipped on the idea of accepting me when they got to know what specific caste I belonged to. I was pretty optimistic as I had already seen something similar in my family to turn out to be successful. So I thought I was the right person to guide him through this. However, months have passed and despite repeated attempts, his parents are not ready to agree. Meanwhile I kept comparing his actions and frequency of having the talk with his parents and found is efforts not up to the mark but I understand now that it was the best he could do. He has a very stressful job on top of it. So, both of us kept telling the other person to call it quits if either of us wanted to. But neither of us wanted to end it and it became a long hefty struggle. He stopped proper communication and I couldn’t handle it and it got worse. But still neither of us wanted to give up. Ultimately I talked to his mother to free her mind of any prejudice with regards to me. But she was very cold during the whole conversation. She said that her son is her pride and he’ll be dead for her if he goes on to marry me. She said that she knows her son and her son would never marry someone without her blessing and that she would never agree. When I talked to my partner, he had no reaction to his mother’s cold behaviour and instead told me to take a decision to call it off now that I had a clear picture in front of me. He says he cannot see me hanging forever because he doesn’t see his parents getting convinced ever and he can’t keep hurting them without any positive result. When I said that the fact that he was accepting his parent’s decision and not willing to try anymore made him a part of the problem and he hung up on me and we haven’t talked since. I wish we could have handled this better. Been there for each other. And even though neither of us wanted to give up, i did not anticipate this blunt and sudden end. I wish we could have still expressed how we felt for each other and moved on mutually and peacefully. But I think he couldn’t take any more pressure on himself. And he couldn’t see me suffering forever which is why he started withdrawing emotionally. I am unable to accept it still and I think i might wait for him forever.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What is your question for me?
Let me assume that you just wanted to share and convey that you wish to wait for him forever.
What's the point waiting for someone who has decided to move on? Maybe he could not see you wait forever BUT he also did not take a stand for your relationship, right?
Taking things too far like what you are doing by waiting for someone who does not even acknowledge your love and presence in his life whatever the reason maybe, it's clear that he has decided to yield to what his mother wants. Even if he decides to be with you, do remember that his mother will be a huge influence in a not so great way on him and that may not be great for your relationship.
You have a great life ahead of you; why don't you experience life without him for a while and actually feel the weight lifting off your shoulders? At least you are not the only one who seems to be carrying on the burden of the relationship...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9569 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 02, 2025Hindi
Money
Hi sir, I'm 41. 10 years Late into IT now earning 66000 per month salary in Bangalore. No savings. Married 1 daughter studying 8th in CBSE. Kindly suggest me a financial investment procedure and I have corporate insurance for me n my wife. Shall I add my parents to it?
Ans: You have taken a responsible step in seeking help. At 41, with no savings yet, it’s not too late. With proper steps, you can build a solid financial base for your family. Let's break it down in a simple, practical and long-term way.
________________________________________
Family and Financial Overview
• Age: 41 years
• Location: Bangalore
• Monthly income: Rs. 66,000
• No current savings
• Married with one daughter (8th Standard, CBSE)
• Corporate health cover for self and wife
• Parents are not yet added to cover
You are starting slightly late, but not too late. Let’s start the process step-by-step.
________________________________________
First Focus – Budget and Cash Flow Planning
This is the first and most important part.
• Track your monthly expenses clearly
• Separate needs and wants every month
• Create a spending limit for each category
• Avoid personal loans and credit card dues
• Make sure there is always surplus every month
Suggested Budget Breakup:
• Household + daily expenses: Rs. 25,000 – Rs. 30,000
• Rent + utilities (if applicable): Rs. 12,000 – Rs. 15,000
• School + child expenses: Rs. 6,000 – Rs. 8,000
• Savings target: Rs. 10,000 – Rs. 12,000
You should aim to save at least 15–20% now and increase later.
________________________________________
Step 1 – Emergency Fund First
Before you invest, build an emergency fund.
• Keep 4 to 5 months’ expenses in hand
• This protects you during job loss or health issues
• Keep Rs. 1.5 to 2 lakhs in liquid fund or sweep-in FD
• Do not invest this money in equity or risky options
• You can build this slowly over 6 months
This gives confidence and reduces stress.
________________________________________
Step 2 – Term Life Insurance is Must
You are the only earning member. So your family depends on your income.
• Take a term insurance of Rs. 50 lakhs to start
• Premium will be very low if taken early
• This is pure insurance. No returns.
• Do not buy any ULIP or money-back plans
• Increase cover in future when income grows
Term plan ensures your family is protected.
________________________________________
Step 3 – Health Insurance Beyond Corporate Cover
Corporate health cover is not enough.
• You should have one personal health policy
• Cover for you, wife and daughter
• Minimum Rs. 5 lakhs coverage
• If your parents are senior citizens, get separate policy for them
• Do not mix all members in one floater plan
You can’t depend only on company cover. It may go if job changes.
________________________________________
Step 4 – Start SIP for Long-Term Wealth
You must now begin SIP for wealth building.
• Start with Rs. 5,000–7,000 per month
• Increase slowly every year
• Invest in 2–3 well-diversified actively managed mutual funds
• Avoid index funds. They don’t beat market returns
• Don’t go for direct funds. Regular plan via MFD with CFP is better
Your SIP can be split like this:
• 50% in flexi-cap or large-cap fund
• 30% in mid-cap or multi-cap fund
• 20% in hybrid or conservative equity fund
This will help you build wealth for retirement and child’s future.
________________________________________
Step 5 – Plan for Daughter’s Education
Your daughter is now in class 8.
In next 4–5 years, she will need money for higher studies.
• Set a clear goal for education cost
• Start a separate SIP for this purpose
• If you can set aside Rs. 3,000–5,000 monthly, it will help
• Keep this money only for her education
• Don’t use it for other needs
You can also invest yearly bonus or incentives into this fund.
________________________________________
Step 6 – Retirement Planning
At 41, you still have about 18–20 working years.
• Use NPS to build retirement fund
• Also keep a SIP in mutual fund separately
• Even Rs. 3,000 per month now will grow big later
• Do not depend only on EPF or employer benefits
• Do not delay this, or you will miss compounding benefit
Your retirement is your own responsibility.
________________________________________
Step 7 – Add Parents to Insurance Carefully
If your company allows, you may add parents to corporate health cover.
• It will help in basic hospitalisation cases
• But corporate cover has limits and co-pay
• Also, it may go away if job changes or company policy changes
• It’s better to take separate senior citizen health plan for them
• That gives peace of mind
If you can’t afford separate policy now, keep a medical buffer for them.
________________________________________
Step 8 – Avoid These Common Mistakes
• Don’t delay investments any more
• Don’t buy policies for investment
• Don’t rely on FD or RD for long-term goals
• Don’t mix insurance and investment
• Don’t invest in direct mutual funds without guidance
Always invest with clarity and purpose.
________________________________________
Step 9 – Increase Investments Every Year
• Increase SIP with each salary hike
• Top-up SIP at least 5–10% every year
• Put any bonus or incentives in lump sum in mutual fund
• Don’t upgrade lifestyle too fast
• Stick to your savings ratio
Wealth is built slowly with consistency.
________________________________________
Step 10 – Track and Review Every Year
• Keep all investments and goals in one place
• Use apps or Excel to track growth
• Review performance every 6 months
• Rebalance only when needed
• Take help from Certified Financial Planner for yearly check-up
This ensures you stay on the right path.
________________________________________
Final Insights
You are 41 now. You still have time to secure your future.
But the right time to act is now.
Start with basics – emergency fund, term insurance, SIP.
Build each step one by one.
Don’t wait for perfect income to start saving.
Start with what you can and grow slowly.
Use mutual funds in regular plan via MFD with CFP.
Avoid index funds. They offer only average returns.
Avoid direct funds. You need expert hand-holding.
Don’t rely on company insurance or EPF alone.
Take responsibility for your family’s financial safety.
With right action, you can still build a good future.
________________________________________
Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9569 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 02, 2025Hindi
Money
Iam 30 years old and have invested around 18 lakhs in MF like (1)paragh pareikh flexi cap fund(2)Quant mid cap and small cap direct growth (3)Aditya Birla sun life PSU equity fund (4) ICICI technology direct growth (5) Invesco india contra direct fund (6) Aditya Birla sun life healthcare fund (7) Edelweiss aggresive Hybrid fund direct growth But the corpus is not growing most of the amount is lump sum shall I continue these funds or transfer it to some other holding is since last 1 year
Ans: Understanding Your Investment Concern

You are 30 years old now.

You have invested Rs. 18 lakhs in mutual funds.

Most of the money is lump sum, not SIP.

You are disappointed with the growth in the past year.

You are holding a mix of sectoral and thematic funds.

Some funds are mid-cap, small-cap, and hybrid too.

Let us assess this from all angles and give a 360° guidance.

Why the Portfolio May Not Be Performing

Equity markets are volatile in the short term.

One year is too short to judge mutual funds.

Mid and small caps are more volatile than large caps.

Sector funds like tech or pharma are risky and cyclical.

Some funds may overlap in holdings.

Direct plans don’t offer guidance or portfolio correction.

Disadvantages of Sector and Thematic Funds

Sector funds invest in only one industry.

If that sector underperforms, the fund suffers.

Healthcare and PSU sectors are not consistent.

Technology funds are highly volatile in current markets.

These funds need expert entry and exit timing.

They are not suitable for long-term wealth building.

You are exposed to concentrated risks.

Disadvantages of Direct Plans

Direct funds have lower expense ratio, but lack support.

No one guides when to shift or redeem.

No tracking, no rebalancing is available.

You may miss important updates or changes.

There is no hand-holding in market corrections.

Regular funds through MFD with CFP give complete advice.

You get periodic reviews and goal-based tracking.

That improves long-term discipline and confidence.

Need for Portfolio Simplification

Your portfolio is spread across too many categories.

This makes review and monitoring very hard.

Overlap of stocks can reduce diversification benefits.

You should not hold more than 3–4 funds.

Sectoral and thematic funds should be avoided now.

They create confusion and increase risk exposure.

Only keep diversified equity and hybrid funds.

Suggested Action Plan

Avoid exiting all funds at once.

Create a clear portfolio goal for each holding.

Divide your Rs. 18 lakhs based on time horizon.

Shift out from sectoral funds in a phased manner.

Move into diversified equity and balanced hybrid funds.

Take help of MFDs with CFP credential.

They will help in goal alignment and fund selection.

Phased Exit Strategy

Do not redeem all funds together.

Use market rallies to exit thematic funds slowly.

Exit technology and PSU funds first.

Then shift funds to suitable long-term diversified funds.

Avoid panic selling in bearish phases.

Why Actively Managed Funds are Better

Index funds just copy the market.

They don’t protect capital in market falls.

No flexibility to exit weak sectors.

Actively managed funds adjust based on market trends.

Fund managers use research to find strong stocks.

They aim to beat the market consistently.

This helps in long-term wealth building.

Rebuilding with a Fresh SIP Plan

Start new SIPs in actively managed flexi-cap or large-mid funds.

Add a hybrid fund for medium-term goals.

Choose funds that suit your risk and goals.

Use Rs. 10,000–15,000 monthly SIP to average cost.

Let lump sum units stay and recover gradually.

Review portfolio every 6 months with a CFP.

Taxation Considerations While Switching

Capital gains tax applies when you redeem mutual funds.

Equity fund gains over Rs. 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.

Gains below that are tax-free.

Short-term capital gains taxed at 20%.

Check holding period before redeeming.

Exit only when gains are above cost and taxable limit is safe.

Emergency Fund and Insurance Check

Maintain 4–6 months’ expenses in liquid fund.

Don’t invest emergency money in equity.

Ensure term insurance and health insurance are in place.

Insurance is not investment. Don’t mix both.

Avoid These Common Mistakes Going Forward

Don’t invest based on returns of past 1 year.

Don’t hold too many funds without reason.

Don’t continue with direct funds if you feel lost.

Don’t mix sectoral funds with core portfolio.

Don’t exit mutual funds during market correction.

Benefits of Working With a CFP

CFP gives goal-based investment plans.

Reviews and updates are done regularly.

Asset allocation is adjusted based on life stage.

Tax planning is included in strategy.

You save time and avoid emotional decisions.

Certified advice builds long-term confidence.

Final Insights

Your frustration is understandable but avoid sudden exits.

Markets take time to reward patient investors.

Avoid sectoral and thematic funds for long-term goals.

Direct plans are not suitable without expert hand-holding.

Regular plans through MFD and CFP offer support and clarity.

Keep your investments simple and well-diversified.

Create new SIPs for long-term wealth creation.

Exit existing risky funds in steps, not all at once.

Track and review your goals every 6–12 months.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9569 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 02, 2025Hindi
Money
Sir, I am 70 year old widow and have 60 laks to support for my rest of the life, out of which 30 laks are in scss, and rest in FDs giving average 7% return. No dependents. I get 65000 pm as pension. My current year's (FY) requirement will be 10 laks. Please guide me for restructuring my portfolio so that it can last for next 20 years.
Ans: You are 70 years old and a widow.
You have Rs 60 lakh in total investments.
Rs 30 lakh is in SCSS.
The other Rs 30 lakh is in bank fixed deposits.
Your pension income is Rs 65,000 per month.
Your annual expenses are around Rs 10 lakh.

Let us now assess this from all angles and plan carefully.

Understanding Your Financial Position
Rs 65,000 pension gives Rs 7.8 lakh yearly income.

Your annual need is Rs 10 lakh.

You have a gap of Rs 2.2 lakh every year.

This gap must be funded from your savings.

Your savings need to last for next 20 years.

You are not looking to grow wealth. You are looking to preserve capital and get income.

Reassessing Fixed Deposits and SCSS
SCSS is government-backed and safe.

It pays good interest and is suitable for senior citizens.

But interest is taxable.

FD returns are also taxable.

Inflation can reduce real value of your savings.

If Rs 60 lakh only stays in FD or SCSS, it may not beat inflation.
You may face shortfall in future years.
Hence, some restructuring is required now.

SCSS Strategy (Rs 30 Lakh)
You already used full limit in SCSS.

Continue holding this till maturity.

Keep renewing it only if needed.

Use interest earned for regular expenses.

SCSS is fixed for 5 years.
You may reinvest or slowly shift part of maturity proceeds later.

Fixed Deposit Issues
FDs are simple, but not tax efficient.

Interest is added to your income.

After tax, return becomes less than inflation.

Also, FDs don’t give flexibility in income.

Breaking FDs early can lead to penalty.

Hence, keeping all remaining Rs 30 lakh in FD may not be best.
Let us look at a more balanced way.

Suggested Restructuring of Rs 30 Lakh FD Portion
Split the Rs 30 lakh into three buckets:

1. Safety Bucket (Rs 10 lakh)

Keep this in short-term FD

Use as cash reserve

For hospitalisation or emergencies

Interest will be stable and predictable

Keep this untouched unless needed

2. Stability Bucket (Rs 10 lakh)

Shift this into low-volatility mutual funds

Choose conservative hybrid funds

These combine debt and a little equity

Better than FD in post-tax return

Money grows slowly and steadily

You can withdraw as needed

3. Income Bucket (Rs 10 lakh)

Use this to set up SWP

Choose actively managed balanced or hybrid funds

Set up a monthly withdrawal

Withdraw Rs 20,000–30,000 as needed

This will fill the Rs 2.2 lakh shortfall each year
It will also give better tax efficiency than FDs

Why Mutual Funds Over Fixed Deposits Now
FDs look safe. But they don’t help with rising expenses.

Actively Managed Funds offer:

Professional management

Option to rebalance portfolio

Potential for slightly higher returns

More tax-efficient withdrawal via SWP

Liquidity with no penalty

Avoid index funds.

Disadvantages of index funds for your stage of life:

No downside protection

Fully linked to market movement

No human decision making

Not suited for steady income

Actively managed mutual funds are better for retirees.

Avoid Direct Mutual Funds
Direct plans offer low cost. But they have major drawbacks.

Disadvantages of direct mutual funds:

No personalised advice

No one to guide on rebalancing

Tax planning becomes difficult

Withdrawal strategy is unclear

You must invest only via a Certified Financial Planner-backed MFD.
They will support you in withdrawals, reviews, and tax planning.

Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP) Use
Start SWP from a hybrid mutual fund.
This gives fixed monthly cash flow.
Unlike FDs, capital remains invested.
Withdrawals are partly capital and partly gains.
So tax is lower than FD interest.

SWP helps in:

Monthly income for 20+ years

Stable tax management

Flexibility to stop or change anytime

You can choose to withdraw only Rs 20,000 monthly in Year 1.
Later increase slowly if costs rise.

Tax Implications of Mutual Fund Withdrawals
New MF tax rule from 2025–26:

Equity mutual funds:
LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%
STCG taxed at 20%

Debt mutual funds:
Taxed as per income tax slab

SWP from hybrid equity funds is best.
It gives long-term tax efficiency.
You withdraw monthly without touching the principal.

Use Pension for Main Needs First
Pension is your primary income.

Rs 65,000 per month covers most needs

Use it for food, bills, transport, and medical

Don’t depend on investment for basic needs

Let investments be used for extras or rising costs

If pension is deposited in savings account, set monthly auto transfers.
This helps in budgeting well.

Annual Cash Planning
Each year, do this:

List expected expenses

Use pension and SCSS interest

Fill shortfall using SWP

Review investments once a year

Take help from CFP-backed MFD to rebalance

This keeps your money organised and ensures peace of mind.

Don’t Use Real Estate for Investment
Even if someone suggests buying property, please avoid.

Real estate is not liquid

Rental income is low and inconsistent

Maintenance and paperwork issues arise

Selling takes time and cost

You are better with financial assets that can be used anytime.

Don’t Buy Insurance or New Policies
At this stage, avoid all new policies.

ULIPs, endowment plans are not for your stage

They lock money for many years

Returns are very low

They confuse insurance with investment

If you already hold any LIC or ULIP, check its maturity.
If not needed, consider surrender and shift to mutual funds.

Importance of Professional Guidance
You are at an age where decisions must be careful.

Don’t try to manage alone

Avoid advice from banks or agents

Go to a Certified Financial Planner-backed MFD

They give goal-based solutions

They guide yearly reviews and tax planning

Choose someone who understands your needs. Not just products.

Risks to Plan For
You must plan for 4 key risks:

Medical emergency

Inflation eating into savings

Sudden expenses

Living longer than expected

Your plan should not run out of money at 85 or 90.
SWP + pension + SCSS interest gives that balance.

Final Insights
You are already financially safe for now.
But you must plan for 20 years, not just 2–3 years.
Don’t keep all money in FDs.
Inflation will silently reduce value.
Use a proper mix of mutual funds, SCSS, and emergency funds.
Let a Certified Financial Planner support you with a yearly plan.

By using SWP and hybrid funds, you get peace and stability.
Your retirement can be stress-free and independent.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9569 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 09, 2025

Money
have a monthly salary of 42000 of which there is deduction of 8000 there is nps in that deduction of 3500 and same from employer side. have an rd of 11000 per month have monthly expenses of about 15000 no loans or any sort advice on investing in sip.
Ans: You have done a good job so far. No loans, regular savings, and contribution to NPS shows financial discipline. Now, let's create a structured, long-term investment plan that suits your profile.

Understanding Your Current Financial Snapshot
Monthly salary: Rs. 42,000

Deductions: Rs. 8,000 including NPS contribution

Your NPS: Rs. 3,500

Employer NPS: Rs. 3,500

RD (Recurring Deposit): Rs. 11,000

Monthly expenses: Rs. 15,000

No loans or liabilities

This gives you a strong savings base of around Rs. 18,000 monthly. You are in a good position to begin investing through mutual funds via SIP.

Appreciating Your Current Habits
Saving over 40% of your salary every month

Investing in NPS, which supports retirement

Using RD to build a saving habit

Managing expenses very efficiently

No burden of EMI or credit card dues

These reflect strong money values and low-risk financial behaviour. Very good foundation for long-term planning.

Need to Shift from RD to SIP
RD gives very low returns over long term

After tax and inflation, RD gives negative real return

SIP in mutual funds can give better returns

SIP helps in wealth creation over the long term

For your age and surplus, SIP is more suitable

You should reduce RD amount slowly and move that money to SIPs.

Benefits of SIPs in Mutual Funds
You invest small amount every month

SIP helps in averaging market cost

Over long term, SIPs grow wealth faster

You can stop, increase or decrease SIP anytime

SIP gives better flexibility than RD or FD

You have regular income and surplus. So SIPs can become your core investment strategy.

How Much You Can Start With
Your monthly saving potential: Around Rs. 18,000

Suggested SIP amount to start: Rs. 10,000–12,000

Keep Rs. 3,000–5,000 in RD for safety

Keep Rs. 2,000–3,000 in bank account for liquidity

This balances growth with safety and liquidity.

Suggested Allocation of SIPs
A balanced SIP plan suits your risk profile and income stage.

Core Equity Allocation (Large-cap and Flexi-cap funds)

50% of SIP in stable and low-risk equity funds

This ensures consistent growth with low volatility

Supporting Growth Allocation (Mid-cap and Multi-cap)

30% of SIP in growth-oriented funds

Slightly higher risk but better long-term growth

Conservative Allocation (Hybrid or Debt funds)

20% of SIP in low-risk hybrid or short-duration debt

This adds stability and safety

So, out of Rs. 12,000 SIP:

Rs. 6,000 in core equity

Rs. 3,600 in mid/multi-cap

Rs. 2,400 in hybrid/debt fund

Keep SIPs in Actively Managed Funds
Avoid index funds.

Index funds cannot beat the market.

They copy the index and hold even bad stocks.

Index funds do not protect during market falls.

You will get only average returns.

Actively managed funds select good quality stocks.
They can reduce downside and increase returns.
For a retail investor like you, they are better.

Direct vs Regular Funds – Be Cautious
Avoid direct mutual funds.

In direct funds, you invest without guidance

There is no MFD or Certified Financial Planner to help

You miss expert advice during corrections

You may stop or switch funds emotionally

Long-term success needs professional support

Invest through regular plans via an MFD with CFP credential.
That ensures hand-holding, reviews and expert rebalancing.

Emergency Fund First
Before you go all-in with SIPs:

Keep 4–5 months of expenses in liquid fund

This acts as your emergency cushion

You should not withdraw SIPs for urgent needs

So build a buffer of around Rs. 60,000–70,000 first

After this, go full-scale on your SIP plan.

Continue NPS for Retirement
You already contribute Rs. 3,500
Employer also contributes Rs. 3,500
That’s Rs. 7,000 per month in retirement savings
Do not touch this amount till 60 years

This builds a strong base for old age

When to Increase SIPs
Increase SIP every year with salary hike

Even Rs. 1,000 per year makes a big difference

SIP step-up helps beat inflation

Use bonus or incentive to make lumpsum in hybrid funds

Avoid investing bonus fully in RD or FD

Stay consistent with SIPs for long-term growth

Key Do’s and Don’ts
Do's:

Track SIPs every 6 months

Stay invested for at least 7–10 years

Top-up SIPs yearly

Use mobile apps to track portfolio

Consult Certified Financial Planner once a year

Don'ts:

Don’t invest in index funds

Don’t go for direct funds

Don’t stop SIPs during market fall

Don’t invest without goal

Don’t treat SIP like RD

SIPs need patience and vision.

Tax Consideration – Plan Smartly
Equity mutual funds LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%

STCG taxed at 20%

Debt mutual funds taxed as per your income slab

Avoid selling before 3 years

Prefer SWP or staggered withdrawal during redemption phase

With a planned withdrawal, taxes can be optimised.

Insurance Check (Just in Case)
You didn’t mention insurance. But review this:

Have term life cover of at least Rs. 25–30 lakhs

It should be pure term, no returns policy

Premium should be less than 1% of income

Have health insurance, even if you are single

It protects your investments from medical costs

Only if you have LIC, ULIP or insurance-plus-investment plans, surrender and reinvest in mutual funds.

What to Do With RD in Future
You currently invest Rs. 11,000 in RD
That is very high compared to your income
Reduce it slowly to Rs. 3,000
Shift remaining amount into SIP

RD should be only for short-term needs

Suggested Goal-Based SIP Approach
Set goals before starting SIPs.

Emergency Fund:

Liquid fund or short-duration debt fund

Wealth Creation:

SIP in flexi-cap and multi-cap equity funds

Home Down Payment (after 8–10 years):

Balanced advantage fund + equity funds

Retirement (already partly through NPS):

Equity fund SIP + NPS

This gives you a 360-degree financial plan.

Finally
You are doing very well already.
You have savings habit and no loans.
You are ready to move from RD to SIP.
This is a big step towards wealth creation.
With Rs. 12,000 SIP, you can build good wealth in 15–20 years.
Avoid index and direct funds.
Stay with active funds via regular mode and get guidance.
Follow a disciplined path with goal clarity.
Review regularly and increase SIPs yearly.
Start small but grow steadily.
SIP is your key to financial freedom.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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