I am 63+ and will 64 in April-23. My wife expired in Sept-22. I have two daughters and both married and settled in their homes. I feel very lonely these days. Is it right for me to have any live-in-relationship or second marriage. I am still good in health. Please advise.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am truly sorry for your loss...
The journey of grief is so different for each person and you can feel alright on one day and devastated on another day...Give your self ample time to grieve and speak about her; it will be painful but the more you allow yourself to speak about her, you will notice that you are closer to accepting the fact of your loss...it is a journey, so do take your time...
But in the meantime, do make sure that you do take help in the form of a support system of your family and friends. Yes, they do have their own lives but I am sure that they will step in kindly when it is required.
Also, you might find that you socially isolate yourself and move away from everything that used to give you joy. You must find a way of getting back to all of those things reminding yourself that you must live your life too...this is initially a way of filling the vacuum, but soon you will find that it does more that just distract you.

Finding another life partner is a decision that is yours to make; but I will suggest that you heal from the loss and then if and when you feel the time is right, you may seek a life partner. But right now, all you will do is find a huge respite to fill in your loneliness and not be able to form a connection with that person. So, take care of yourself first, heal well and then slowly make life-altering decisions.

All the best...I am sure you can do this!

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am so sorry for your loss. Coping with the loss of a loved one is a deeply personal journey, and there's no right or wrong way to grieve. And it is understandable that you are feeling lonely and struggling with the idea of moving on. Your friends mean well, but you need to give yourself the time and space to heal and mourn the loss before thinking about a relationship. People tend to bury their grief with new love and relationships, but it would be like putting a bandaid on a wound that needs stitches. But once you feel you have moved on, there is no harm in finding a companion. That would not be an injustice to either your new partner or your late wife. You can hold her in your heart and still love someone new.

In the meantime, try out new activities or hobbies. Engaging in something new can provide a sense of purpose and help fill the void.

Best Wishes!

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

It is not too old to get married, especially if you find someone compatible. I understand that finding that perfect match is a bit difficult, but it should not stop you from trying. Put yourself out there; I suggest using dating apps. It is the easiest way to find someone compatible. Make sure to mention 'what you want and what you can offer' to attract the right crowd. If you are not too keen on dating someone who was previously married or with kids, mention that in your BIO to avoid matching with such people.

Again, you are never too old to find love. Don't shy away from having an amazing experience, thinking you are too late to the game.

Best Wishes!

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Once bitten, twice shy!
It happens and someday hopefully you move out of this 'hurt' phase into a 'trust' phase and when you cover that journey (it takes time and a lot of resolve to be able to want to trust again), you will be ready to get into another relationship.
So, decide for yourself when you want to make that journey and as you start, you will encounter insecurities and doubts...stick with it and it will all pass helping you reach a place of calm peace which will enable you to invite another person into your life.

All the best!