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Anu

Anu Krishna  |835 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 20, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
V Question by V on Nov 18, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

I am a 47 year old unmarried woman from Mumbai. I have been in love with a 58 year old married man since 2010. Earlier we would have sex every day for 6 years. I desperately want to marry him but his wife would not give him a divorce. I relocated elsewhere but within travel distance for my lover to spend time with me. Of late I am being courted by a 60 year old man who is reasonably well to do and wants to marry me. I am now caught between my lover and this man. The funniest part is both know each other from their school days. My company's chairman also wants me to marry this man since this man is very good and is liked by every one in the company. Please advise.

Ans: Dear V,
Do you have an opinion on your life or is it going to be governed by what someone else?
Associations with anyone who is married invariably doesn't lead anywhere and you have seen that...He has a family and that is his priority...6 years of your precious time has been with someone who can never give you the status or position that you seek in his life.
Why not rework the way you have been approaching your associations with men so far?
Ask yourself:
- Am I interested in casual relationships or do I want to be in a committed relationship?
- What kind of person will be able to value me, honor and respect me for who I am?
- What are must haves for me in a committed relationship? Does the man in question fill this for me?
- What is something that is a strict NO-NO for me in a relationship?
- What is my opinion on marriage and the responsibilities that come along with it?

This reality check will put things into perspective for you and then you can decide from a place of 'knowing' rather than a place of 'being told'. It's your life and your opinion matters the most!

All the best!

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |175 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 22, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 21, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Hi, I have been married to my love for the last 20 years and have a 15 yr old son. I had a restaurant for 3 years and had got attracted to the executive chef who later became a partner in my restaurant. He is not married. During these years and from before that my married life had been very depressing. My husband stays abroad for work and even when he comes we do not gel because we have been living away for too long. We don’t relate to each other any more. We also do not have a sex life during the time I had my restaurant. The chef knows all about my family and often have visited and partied with my husband too. We have crossed the line and have still been in love for the last 4 yrs. He is unmarried and is much younger to me but he is fully committed to me. I can’t understand what to do. Please guide.
Ans: hello there,
It sounds like you are in a complex and emotionally challenging situation. Infidelity and emotional involvement with someone outside of your marriage can be difficult to navigate Decisions about relationships and marriages are significant and often take time. Avoid making impulsive decisions and give yourself the time needed to carefully consider your options.Take into account the impact of your decisions on your son. Children can be profoundly affected by changes in their parents' relationship. Ensure that any decisions made consider his well-being Reflect on what you want for your future. Do you want to work on your marriage, or do you feel that it's irreparable? Make decisions based on what aligns with your values and long-term goals. Assess your relationship with the chef. Consider the potential consequences of continuing this relationship, especially given your commitment to your husband. Understand the impact it may have on all parties involved Open and honest communication is crucial. If you haven't already, have a frank conversation with your husband about your feelings, the state of your marriage, and any areas that need improvement. This may be a difficult conversation, but it's an essential step in understanding each other's perspectives.

All the best.
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Anu

Anu Krishna  |835 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 09, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello madam, i m 32 year married women, my husband love more than anything, he is good in everything, he take care of me, he bring me whatever i want, he is very good in bed. But i dont love him. Before marriage i had boyfriend, he never accepted me and assured he will marry me, so i decided to marry my husband in 2019. Till oct 2022 i had communication with my ex boyfriend, but when he got married he stopped calling me and i also stoped thinking about him. Lately i meet guy in my office he is 23, music teacher, not so good looking, not completed graduation, not financial strong but i developed feeling for him. I lied to him about my marriage, to get close to him. Once my husband caught me doing wrong, told me to not do. But still i want to continue and want to live with this guy. I want to divorce and live with young guy. I am doing correct or not please suggest.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
The fact that you are asking me whether it is correct or not shows that you are absolutely questioning yourself...
You yourself said that your husband loves you more than anything...then what makes you go around in circles searching for love and attention outside? Obviously you are unable to appreciate what you have...when you can't see that you have a stable life, all you think of doing is thinking of the boyfriend who did not accept you and the young boy who all of 23 is immature and financially unstable with who you want to live with!
Are things described in a nutshell now? You are free to make your choices but also know that you will have to bear the consequences.
At 23,
What sort of a life ahead he visualized for himself?
Does it include you?
What is the guarantee that he will not meet younger women later on?
And if you wish to start a family considering that he is already 23, does he have the capability to support you and the baby?
- Have you considered all of this?
Kindly step up for yourself and start thinking rather than running around in a scattered way looking for someone else to make you happy...

All the best!
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Love Guru

Love Guru   |187 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 16, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 09, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello madam, i m 32 year married women, my husband love me more than anything, he is good in everything, he take care of me, he bring me whatever i want, he is very good in bed also. We dont have kids because i never loved my husband. Before marriage i had boyfriend, he never accepted me and assured me that he will marry me, so i decided to marry my husband in 2019. Till oct 2022, i used to communicate with my ex boyfriend, but when he got married he stopped calling me and i also stoped thinking about him. Lately, in Sept 2023, i meet guy in my office he is 23, music teacher, not so good looking, not completed graduation, not financial strong but i developed feeling for him. I lied to him, told i am not married, to get close to him. Once my husband caught me cheating with him in whatsapp messages, told me to not do. But still i went ahead to continue my relationship with this young guy and want to live with this guy. I want to divorce and live with young guy. My parents and family love and respect my husband like their own son. I am doing correct or not please suggest me.
Ans: No you certainly are not “doing correct”! Here’s a good man who loves you and treats you well and has forgiven your indiscretions and still you want someone else? You agreed to marry, right - no one put a gun to your head. Now honour that commitment and stop being so fickle-minded. At 23, your boyfriend is really young and immature. Right now you’re all hot and heavy, but give it a minute; realistically your relationship is unlikely to survive in the long run. And you want to hurt your husband and walk out on your marriage for nothing…he’s only ever treated you right. Don’t be a fool!
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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |179 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 20, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am a 26 years old girl completed my studies, trying to get a job, 2 years back I fell in love online with a man of 32 years old, we have not met yet physically. He is working on a very small salary in a village i.e. his hometown. He can't get a good government job or private job now due to lack of experience and age. We love each other a lot with all our flaws. My family is strictly against it due to caste difference, low salary, he lives 1600 km away, background differences. Overall they don't trust him and our love and are emotionally blackmailing me to get married with someone they choose. And the thought alone of leaving him makes me sad
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am sorry for the challenges you are facing. I understand how difficult it must be to leave a person you love. Having said that, I would also like to point out that living a decent life is not cheap. You are currently unemployed and your partner has a low salary; it will not be sustainable in the long run. I am not asking you to leave him and marry someone else; all I am suggesting is don't rush. Take the time to find a decent job and ask your partner to do the same. Once you think you both are earning a good amount of money, put forth the idea of your marriage again to your parents.

Now the most important thing, you have met him online and never met him in real life. Is it worth taking this kind of risk before verifying everything in person? I am sure he is genuine but there is no harm in cross-checking. And I can't really blame your parents for having their doubts. Please don't rush. One wrong decision can ruin the rest of your life. Take your time, think this through, and meet him in person, most likely in your city and in a public space. Do a thorough background check. It is easy to get fooled when you are in love.

Again, please don't rush. You have your whole life ahead of you.

Best Wishes
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Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 12, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hi, i have 20,000$ USD available to invest. Will transfer them to my NRE account this month. Please suggest best ways i can invest money in india for max returns - both short term and long term
Ans: That's a significant amount to invest, and it's great that you're considering your options carefully. Since you're looking to invest in India, Mutual Funds (MFs) can offer a diversified and potentially rewarding investment avenue. Here's a suggestion for both short-term and long-term investment:

Short-term Investment:
Consider investing a portion of your funds in Liquid Mutual Funds. These funds invest in short-term debt instruments with a maturity period of up to 91 days, providing liquidity and stability. They are ideal for parking funds temporarily while you decide on your long-term investment strategy. The repatriable nature of these funds allows you to easily convert your investment back to USD whenever needed.
Long-term Investment:
For long-term wealth accumulation, you can explore Equity Mutual Funds. These funds invest in a diversified portfolio of stocks, offering the potential for higher returns over the long term. Since you have a longer investment horizon, you can consider a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and flexi-cap funds to spread risk and optimize returns. Equity Mutual Funds have the potential to outperform other asset classes over extended periods.
It's essential to assess your risk tolerance, investment goals, and time horizon before making investment decisions. Additionally, ensure that the investments you choose offer the repatriable feature, allowing you to repatriate the funds back to your foreign account if needed. Consulting with a Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized guidance tailored to your financial objectives and help you make informed investment choices.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

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Money
How the mutual funds given more interest rate
Ans: Mutual funds do not offer interest rates like traditional fixed deposits. Instead, mutual funds generate returns through capital appreciation and/or income distribution. Here's how mutual funds can potentially provide higher returns:

Capital Appreciation: Mutual funds invest in a diversified portfolio of securities such as stocks, bonds, and other financial instruments. When the value of these underlying assets increases over time, the mutual fund's net asset value (NAV) also rises, leading to capital appreciation for investors.
Dividend Income: Some mutual funds, particularly equity funds, may distribute dividends to investors from the profits earned by the underlying investments. Similarly, debt funds may generate income through interest payments received from the bonds or fixed-income securities held in the portfolio.
Compounding: Mutual funds offer the benefit of compounding, where returns earned on investments are reinvested to generate additional returns over time. Compounding can significantly boost the growth of investments, especially over long investment horizons.
Professional Management: Mutual funds are managed by experienced fund managers who make investment decisions based on thorough research and analysis. Their expertise and active management can potentially generate higher returns compared to individual investors managing their portfolios.
Diversification: Mutual funds pool investments from multiple investors and diversify across various asset classes, sectors, and securities. Diversification helps spread risk and reduce the impact of volatility on investment returns, potentially enhancing overall returns.
It's important to note that mutual fund returns are subject to market risks, and there are no guarantees of returns or capital protection. Investors should carefully consider their investment objectives, risk tolerance, and investment horizon before investing in mutual funds. Consulting with a Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized advice and help investors make informed decisions aligned with their financial goals.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

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Money
Please suggest a few good Mutual Funds for Short Term Lumpsum investment of 20-30 lakhs
Ans: For a short-term lump sum investment of 20-30 lakhs, consider mutual funds that prioritize capital preservation, liquidity, and potential for modest returns. Here are some options to consider:

Liquid Funds: Ideal for short-term investments, liquid funds invest in short-term debt instruments with high credit quality and low interest rate risk. They offer liquidity and stability while providing slightly higher returns than traditional savings accounts.
Ultra Short Duration Funds: These funds invest in a mix of money market instruments and short-term debt securities, offering slightly higher returns than liquid funds with a slightly longer investment horizon.
Low Duration Funds: Low duration funds invest in short-term debt instruments with slightly longer maturities compared to liquid and ultra short duration funds. They provide a balance between returns and risk, suitable for investors with a moderate risk appetite.
Short Duration Funds: These funds invest in a diversified portfolio of debt and money market instruments with a duration typically ranging from one to three years. They offer higher potential returns than ultra short and low duration funds, with a slightly higher level of risk.
Bank Fixed Deposits (FDs): While not mutual funds, bank FDs offer a safe and predictable return on investment for short-term parking of funds. Consider spreading your investment across multiple banks to benefit from deposit insurance coverage.
Before investing, assess your investment horizon, risk tolerance, and liquidity requirements. Ensure that the chosen funds align with your financial goals and investment objectives. Additionally, review the track record, expense ratios, and fund manager credentials of each mutual fund to make an informed decision.

Consulting with a Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized guidance and help you select the most suitable mutual funds based on your specific financial situation and objectives.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 12, 2024Hindi
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Money
Sir, I am 37 years old and plan to take a term life insurance for my family, which consists of my wife and 6 year old daughter. I am confused whether I should choose a normal policy which expires after the coverage period, or one which returns the premiums after the coverage period. Obviously, the latter involves spending a higher sum as premium per month. Also please suggest the companies offering policies with better claim settling history
Ans: opting for a pure term life insurance policy is generally advisable over a return of premium (ROP) policy. ROP policies tend to have higher premiums, as they offer to return premiums at the end of the term if the policyholder survives. However, this feature often comes at the cost of higher premiums, making it less cost-effective in the long run.

With pure term insurance, you pay lower premiums for the same coverage amount, ensuring that your family receives a substantial sum assured in case of your unfortunate demise. It's a straightforward and transparent form of protection without any investment component or frills attached.

When selecting an insurance provider, prioritize companies with a strong track record of claim settlement and customer service. Look for insurers with high claim settlement ratios and positive reviews from policyholders.

Remember, the primary purpose of life insurance is to provide financial protection to your loved ones in your absence. By opting for a pure term policy, you ensure that your family receives the necessary financial support without any unnecessary frills or complexities.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 12, 2024Hindi
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Money
I have a corpus fund of 20 Lacs. Could you please suggest any investment strategy where I can earn monthly income
Ans: With a corpus fund of 20 lakhs, generating a monthly income requires a prudent investment strategy. Consider allocating a portion of your corpus to income-generating assets while preserving capital. Here are some potential strategies:

Fixed Deposits (FDs) or Recurring Deposits (RDs): Invest a portion of your corpus in FDs or RDs with banks or NBFCs to earn a fixed interest income monthly.
Debt Mutual Funds: Consider investing in debt mutual funds that focus on generating regular income through interest payments from debt securities. Choose funds with a track record of stable returns and low expense ratios.
Dividend-Paying Stocks: Invest in dividend-paying stocks of established companies to receive regular dividend income. Focus on companies with a history of consistent dividend payouts and strong fundamentals.
Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP): Implement an SWP in mutual funds to systematically withdraw a fixed amount from your corpus each month. Opt for funds with a balanced allocation to equity and debt for stability and growth potential.
Real Estate Investment Trusts (REITs) or Infrastructure Investment Trusts (InvITs): Consider investing in REITs or InvITs, which distribute a portion of their rental income or infrastructure project cash flows to investors as dividends.
Annuities: Explore the option of purchasing annuities from insurance companies, which provide a regular income stream in exchange for a lump-sum investment.
Before implementing any investment strategy, assess your financial goals, risk tolerance, and liquidity needs. Diversify your investments across asset classes to mitigate risk and optimize returns. Consult with a Certified Financial Planner to develop a personalized income-generating strategy tailored to your financial objectives and circumstances.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

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Money
I am investing ?3, 000/- each in SIP of Axis Blue Chip Fund, Parag Parikh Flexi Cap, Edelweiss Balanced Advantage, SBI Magnum Mid Cap, Kotak Small Cap and Kotak Gold Fund. Is my portfolio an investment in right direction. I intend to keep the investment for 10 years.
Ans: Your portfolio seems to be well-diversified across various categories of mutual funds, which is a good strategy for long-term wealth accumulation. Let's analyze each fund in your portfolio:

Axis Blue Chip Fund: This fund invests in large-cap stocks with a track record of stable earnings and strong fundamentals. It offers stability and growth potential, making it suitable for conservative investors.
Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund: This flexi-cap fund has the flexibility to invest across market capitalizations and sectors. It follows a bottom-up stock-picking approach, aiming for long-term capital appreciation. It's suitable for investors seeking diversification and growth.
Edelweiss Balanced Advantage Fund: This fund dynamically allocates between equity and debt instruments based on market conditions. It aims to provide stable returns with lower volatility, making it suitable for investors with a moderate risk tolerance.
SBI Magnum Mid Cap Fund: Mid-cap funds like this one invest in mid-sized companies with the potential for higher growth. They can be more volatile but offer the potential for significant long-term returns.
Kotak Small Cap Fund: Small-cap funds invest in small-sized companies with high growth potential. They can be more volatile but offer the potential for substantial long-term gains.
Kotak Gold Fund: This fund invests in gold ETFs, providing exposure to the precious metal. Gold can act as a hedge against inflation and currency fluctuations, adding diversification to your portfolio.
Overall, your portfolio covers a range of market segments, including large-cap, flexi-cap, mid-cap, small-cap, and gold. This diversification can help spread risk and optimize returns over the long term. However, ensure that your portfolio aligns with your risk tolerance and investment goals.

Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner to review your portfolio and make any necessary adjustments based on changes in market conditions or your personal circumstances. They can provide personalized guidance to help you achieve your investment objectives with confidence over the next 10 years.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

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Money
Sir I am just start sip UTI NIFTY F 50 3500 UTI NEXT 50 2500 PARAG PARAGH FELXI CAP 4000 NAVI MIDCAP 150 2500 QUANTH SMALL 2000 ITS GOOD SIR
Ans: Your selection of mutual funds for SIP investment appears to be diversified across different market segments, which is generally a good strategy for long-term wealth accumulation. Here are some considerations:

Index Funds: UTI Nifty 50 and UTI Next 50 are index funds that track the Nifty 50 and Nifty Next 50 indices, respectively. These funds provide exposure to top-performing large-cap and mid-cap companies, offering broad market diversification with relatively lower expense ratios.
Flexi-cap Funds: Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund and Navi Midcap 150 are flexi-cap and mid-cap funds, respectively. These funds have the flexibility to invest across companies of various market capitalizations, providing diversification and the potential for higher returns.
Small-cap Funds: Quant Small Cap Fund focuses on investing in small-cap companies with high growth potential. Small-cap funds can be more volatile but offer the potential for significant long-term returns.
Overall, your portfolio is well-diversified across large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap segments of the market, which can help spread risk and optimize returns over the long term. However, it's essential to regularly review your portfolio's performance and ensure it remains aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance.

Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner to evaluate your investment strategy and make any necessary adjustments based on changes in market conditions or your personal circumstances. They can provide personalized guidance to help you achieve your investment objectives with confidence.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 11, 2024Hindi
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Money
Sir , I'm 35 years now , Investing In company PPF ( COAL INDIA LIMITED) 10500 per month, need to further Invest 10000 per month in MF for long term and my risk category is Conservative
Ans: Given your conservative risk profile and the desire for long-term investment, it's prudent to consider mutual fund options that prioritize stability and consistent returns. Here are some suggestions:

Large-cap Equity Funds: These funds invest in well-established companies with a track record of stable earnings and lower volatility. They offer relatively lower risk compared to mid-cap or small-cap funds. Look for funds with a proven track record of delivering consistent returns over the long term.
Balanced Advantage Funds: These funds dynamically allocate between equity and debt instruments based on market conditions, aiming to provide stable returns with lower volatility. They can be suitable for conservative investors seeking a balance between growth and capital preservation.
Hybrid Equity Funds: These funds invest in a mix of equity and debt instruments, offering diversification and downside protection. They are suitable for investors looking for a combination of growth and stability in their portfolio.
Index Funds: These funds passively track a market index like the Nifty 50 or Sensex, offering broad market exposure with low expenses. They can be a suitable option for conservative investors seeking stable returns without active fund management.
Debt Funds: Consider allocating a portion of your investment to debt funds for stability and income generation. Options include short-duration funds or corporate bond funds, which invest in high-quality fixed income securities.
Before investing, carefully assess the risk-return profile of each fund and ensure it aligns with your investment objectives and risk tolerance. It's also advisable to consult with a Certified Financial Planner to create a personalized investment plan tailored to your financial goals and circumstances. They can provide valuable guidance and help you navigate the complexities of mutual fund investing to achieve long-term wealth accumulation with peace of mind.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1249 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

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I am buying MFs through icici direct It was till now mostly elss to save tax I want to invest in bulk ( no SIP ) now My questio is I gather icici would charge 1.5 % upfront for any buys and 1% on it every year then onwards so after 10 yars i gain say 15 % overall then , 11.5 % ( 1.5 +10 ) will already been charged by icici leaving me with 3.5% returns? Is this correct ? they never rwspond transparently abd give evasive replies
Ans: It's important to clarify the fee structure and its impact on your overall returns when investing through platforms like ICICI Direct. While they may charge an upfront fee and an annual fee for maintaining your investments, the impact on your returns may not be as significant as you've outlined.

Firstly, the upfront fee is typically a one-time charge applied at the time of purchase and is not deducted annually from your investment returns. Similarly, the annual fee (if applicable) is usually a percentage of the assets under management and is deducted from your investment periodically, rather than as a lump sum at the end of the investment period.

While fees can affect your returns, it's essential to consider the potential returns generated by your investments over time. If your investments perform well, they can potentially outweigh the impact of fees on your overall returns.

However, it's crucial to have clarity on the fee structure and its impact on your investments. If you're unsure about the fees charged by ICICI Direct or if you feel they're not being transparent, it may be beneficial to seek advice from a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) who can provide unbiased guidance and help you navigate the investment process more effectively. Working with an MFD can bring synergy to your investment journey and ensure you make informed decisions aligned with your financial goals.
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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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