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Anu Krishna1026 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 20, 2023

Asked on - Nov 18, 2023Hindi

I am a 47 year old unmarried woman from Mumbai. I have been in love with a 58 year old married man since 2010. Earlier we would have sex every day for 6 years. I desperately want to marry him but his wife would not give him a divorce. I relocated elsewhere but within travel distance for my lover to spend time with me. Of late I am being courted by a 60 year old man who is reasonably well to do and wants to marry me. I am now caught between my lover and this man. The funniest part is both know each other from their school days. My company's chairman also wants me to marry this man since this man is very good and is liked by every one in the company. Please advise.
Ans: Dear V,
Do you have an opinion on your life or is it going to be governed by what someone else?
Associations with anyone who is married invariably doesn't lead anywhere and you have seen that...He has a family and that is his priority...6 years of your precious time has been with someone who can never give you the status or position that you seek in his life.
Why not rework the way you have been approaching your associations with men so far?
Ask yourself:
- Am I interested in casual relationships or do I want to be in a committed relationship?
- What kind of person will be able to value me, honor and respect me for who I am?
- What are must haves for me in a committed relationship? Does the man in question fill this for me?
- What is something that is a strict NO-NO for me in a relationship?
- What is my opinion on marriage and the responsibilities that come along with it?

This reality check will put things into perspective for you and then you can decide from a place of 'knowing' rather than a place of 'being told'. It's your life and your opinion matters the most!

All the best!
Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal97 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 18, 2023

Asked on - Jun 09, 2023Hindi

Dear Sir, I am a self employed man. I started my business at the age of 57. my business involves travelling to far flung areas to assess the performance of my clients who are charitable trusts. Though I did booming business during COVID, today it is floundering which I am unable to understand. I also feel that I am slowly slipping into partial depression. I am unable to handle both though I am a bachelor.
Ans: I'm sorry to hear that you're experiencing a downturn in your business and struggling with your mental well-being. It can be challenging to navigate such situations, but there are steps you can take to address both issues:

Seek professional help: Consider reaching out to a mental health professional, such as a therapist or counselor, who can provide guidance and support for your feelings of depression. They can help you develop coping strategies and explore any underlying factors contributing to your current state of mind.

Evaluate your business: Take some time to analyze the factors that might be impacting your business negatively. Consider the current market conditions, changes in client needs, and any potential competition. It might be beneficial to consult with a business advisor or mentor who can provide an objective perspective and offer insights on how to adapt and improve your business strategies.

Identify areas for improvement: Assess your business operations and identify areas where you can make improvements. This could involve refining your marketing strategies, expanding your client base, diversifying your services, or exploring new market opportunities. Consider seeking feedback from your clients to gain insights into their needs and how you can better serve them.

Seek support from your network: Reach out to your professional network or industry associations for support and advice. Engaging with others in your field can provide valuable insights and potentially lead to new opportunities or collaborations.

Take care of your mental well-being: Alongside seeking professional help, prioritize self-care activities that can help improve your mental health. This may include regular exercise, practicing mindfulness or meditation, maintaining a balanced diet, getting sufficient sleep, and engaging in activities you enjoy. Prioritizing self-care will help you manage stress and maintain a more positive mindset.

Explore new opportunities: If your current business is struggling significantly, you might consider exploring alternative avenues or adapting your services to meet changing market demands. Look for potential partnerships, collaborations, or even new business ideas that align with your skills and interests.

Remember, it's important to be patient with yourself during challenging times. Building a successful business takes time, and setbacks are a part of the entrepreneurial journey. Prioritizing your mental well-being will help you navigate these challenges more effectively. If you continue to feel overwhelmed, don't hesitate to reach out for professional help and support.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.


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