Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |581 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 19, 2023

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
SHASHANK Question by SHASHANK on May 12, 2023Hindi
Listen
Relationship

I'm 48 years old never married guy. I once suffered from rare cancer which is cured now. Also hv epilepsy whose treatment will go life long. Doctor says that i should disclose my health issue with whom I'm thinking of getting married but no one takes talks further. I'm infact ready for divorcee or widow too but failed. Some ppl reject me as my salary is mot much, some says that i dont hv my own hm etc but i hv many friens who are getting less salary but are happily married. My whole family if highly educated although I'm also pg but still get rejected. My dad expired n was too worried for my marriage. Now my mother is with me n i dont know what to do. I hv spend approx 35k on matrimonial advertisements but got no success. Im currently in touch with girl for last 1+ year but dont know whether she likes me or not although i hd expressed my feelings to her many times but she never respond n get silent on that. Kindly help whether i should approach this girl or leave her. I like this girl very much. Should i still search for a bride or leave this issue. Kindly help.

Ans: Dear Shashank,

If you have been straightforward about your feelings for this woman and expressed the same and yet she has never reciprocated it even once so far, it might be because she does not feel the same about it. I'd suggest you talk to her about this. Instead of leaving it open-ended, like "I like you," and letting her react to it, be direct. For instance, "I like you. What about you? Do you like me?" Being direct would definitively fetch you some real answers. If she replies to your question, there you go; you have your answer. If she ignores it still, you can safely assume that she doesn't feel the same way as you do. Don't delay this; ask her as soon as possible. Stretching a relationship that ultimately leads to a dead-end will harm your peace and happiness in the longer run.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Love Guru

Love Guru   |204 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 13, 2022

Listen
Relationship
Love Guru, First let me tell you to be anonymous while publishing reply on this. I am having multiple health problems that might lead to early death as well. I don't want to hide this from my life partner. I'm in love with a girl, whom I can't marry as the law won't allow it under the Sapinda relationship (ed: referring to marriage between cousins within the Hindu community) clause. She too is madly in love with me. Recently she met a boy, whom she thinks she can marry and settle. I'm more than happy to hear that as I am not sure with my regularly weakening health condition, I can be with her for life. I have already asked her to go forward with the marriage proposal. I don't know if can live without her. Somehow I'm getting a feeling that I'm running away from my responsibility. Not sure what to do. Can you please advise?
Ans:

You’re not running away from responsibility, you’re sparing her the responsibility of playing caregiver to you as your health deteriorates and, more importantly, leaving her bereft of a life partner at a young age.

I’m sorry to hear that you have such severe issues but, as difficult as it is for you, I do think this is the right decision if you’re putting her happiness before yours.

The fact that she’s agreed to marry someone else also should also tell you that, inherently, even she is hesitant about your situation.

Moreover, there’s the Sapinda clause, legally speaking, which won’t permit you to marry... you haven’t disclosed just how closely the both of you are related here.

So, all circumstances considered, I think her moving on with someone else is in her best interests.

I wish you health and happiness.

..Read more

R P

R P Yadav  | Answer  |Ask -

HR, Workspace Expert - Answered on Aug 14, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 13, 2023Hindi
Listen
Career
Hellow sir, Request you to please suggest and help? I am 39 yrs old male with no job in hand. I am not married as well. Actually my mom was detected with liver cirrhosis and was asked to have liver transplant on Septemeber 2022. After tht i was all after taking care of my mom and looking out for donors. I didnt hav anybody to take care of my mom, my sister is settled in USA and she was expecting. Hence she could nt help, but all the financal help was done by her. My mom underwent Liver Transplant in the month of May 2023 and now she is recovering. I am with her taking care of her. I hav Dad, bt he is also very old. I was before sept 2022 working in a Reputed hospital as deputy marketing manager. I have done my MBA marketing as well with a hotel management degree. I have a total of 11 years of experience with 8.26 lakhs per year package. I always felt in regards of my marriage i m unable to get a match coz i dont hav a suitable job with good package. At 39 i m unable to upgrade my skills coz of all my responsibilities. Maybe September i am thinking of looking out for a job, as my sister is going to return from US. I want to get married and lead a normal life. I also want to grow in life so that i can keep my family happy. I m afraid of being alone all my life, coz my parents in regards with dere health are not doing well. I also want grow in my career. Request you to please guide me what should i do in life ahead . I had no relatives support that is why i had to leave my job to take care of my Parents. At 39 i feel tht i m too old to get married as dere are very few proposals of my age and those which are dere are very much well settled in life and would epexct somone who is more sucessful than me.
Ans: Hi,
I can understand that you have got two issues primarily. First, you need to get a job and secondly is to get married along with taking care of your parents. You can look for jobs through job portals and look for match through various matrimony portals and marriage bureaus. If you do this consistently for a few months, you are bound to succeed.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8322 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 07, 2025

Money
I am 50 + yr Engg Graduate and working in Pvt sector in NCR and having approx 10 yrs to retirement. # The Combined Family income (Including Dividend & Interest) : Rs. 22 Lac / Annum. # Yearly Expenditure : Rs.13.1 Lac / Annum (Includes Insurance Premium , fee , Rent etc); # I am Staying in Rent ; I am Have a old parental Flat at Lucknow (Vacant) which will be sold off inleu of a new Flat in next 4-5 years time (Present Value of Flat is approx Rs. 75 Lac ; ) # Term Insurance till age 62 yrs: Sum Insured : Rs. 1.70 Cr ; # Health Insurance Floater : Covered till Rs. 50 Lacs. Portfolio : * MF-SIP : 1.80 Cr.; Monthly investment in SIP: ~ 65000/-. [MF SIP Selection is self] * Combined PPF : Rs.40 Lac * Sukanya Samriddhi Yojana : Rs. 6.0 Lac * Share Value: Rs.50 Lacs * FD with Pvt Financial institutions : Rs. 43 Lac. * Cash in Hand : Rs. 4-5 Lacs Major Expenditure to be done: (a) Higher Studies of Daughter: Going for PG - 1st yr & maybe later Phd. (b) Marriage of Daughter. (c) Higher Studies of Son : Presently in Class IX. (d) Marriage of Son . (e) Buying a new House. Pls advise : 1. How much Corpus will I have in next 10 yrs.? 2. How much should be the minimum corpus I should have at the time of my retirement so that it can last maybe for 25 + years post retirement? 3. Will I be able to achieve the reqd corpus? 4. What is the Likely monthly expenditure post my retirement ? 5. Can I share my List of SIP Portfolio with you so that same can be restructured by you ? 6. Should I go for a Professional Financial Planner ? regards
Ans: You have already done a lot of planning. Your awareness and discipline are strong. This gives you a great advantage for your retirement and children’s future.

Understanding Your Present Financial Snapshot
 

You are above 50 years of age and have around 10 years to retire.

 

Your yearly family income is Rs.22 lakh. Expenses are around Rs.13.1 lakh.

 

That means you are saving close to Rs.8.9 lakh yearly. That’s a strong surplus.

 

Monthly SIP is Rs.65,000. You have a solid SIP discipline in place.

 

Current MF SIP corpus is Rs.1.8 crore. That’s a significant base.

 

PPF corpus is Rs.40 lakh. That’s a good stable portion of your savings.

 

Shares are worth Rs.50 lakh. FD value is Rs.43 lakh.

 

You have Rs.4–5 lakh in liquid cash. Sukanya balance is Rs.6 lakh.

 

You are staying on rent. You have an old flat in Lucknow worth Rs.75 lakh.

 

You want to sell the flat in 4–5 years. Use funds for buying a new flat.

 

Health insurance floater of Rs.50 lakh is excellent.

 

Term insurance of Rs.1.7 crore till age 62 is also strong.

 

Likely Corpus in Next 10 Years
 

Your existing investments are already close to Rs.3.7 crore.

 

With SIPs and expected growth, this corpus will rise steadily.

 

Assuming consistent investment, the corpus could cross Rs.6 crore in 10 years.

 

This figure depends on SIP continuation, market returns, and investment review.

 

If you sell the flat in 5 years, you may get Rs.80–85 lakh or more.

 

That can also be redirected to another house purchase.

 

But remember, house is not an investment. It’s a utility asset.

 

It will not support retirement income unless sold or rented.

 

How Much Corpus Is Needed at Retirement?
 

Your current annual spending is Rs.13.1 lakh.

 

Post-retirement, this may reduce slightly. But not by much.

 

Assume 80% of current expenses will continue. That’s around Rs.10.5 lakh yearly.

 

Over 25+ years, this amount will rise due to inflation.

 

A safe minimum retirement corpus can be around Rs.5.5–6 crore.

 

This should cover lifestyle, healthcare, and emergency spending.

 

It also assumes a balanced investment portfolio post-retirement.

 

PPF, FDs, and some debt funds can give regular income.

 

Equity mutual funds should be continued partially for growth.

 

Can You Achieve the Required Corpus?
 

Yes, based on your present investments and habits, you are on track.

 

You must keep SIPs running without breaks for the next 10 years.

 

Increase your SIPs by 8–10% every year.

 

This single habit increases your total retirement corpus sharply.

 

Don’t withdraw from MF portfolio for house or other large expenses.

 

Use surplus from share sale or FD maturity for daughter’s or son’s needs.

 

Maintain separate goals. Don’t mix retirement and child-related funds.

 

Likely Monthly Expenses After Retirement
 

Your monthly spending may reduce, but not disappear.

 

House rent may go if you buy a flat. But other costs may rise.

 

Healthcare costs will rise as you age. So will travel and daily needs.

 

Monthly spending may be around Rs.80,000 to Rs.90,000 after retirement.

 

This will keep increasing due to inflation.

 

Plan for this by keeping a rising income source post-retirement.

 

Part of your MF portfolio must remain in equity to beat inflation.

 

Should You Restructure Your SIP Portfolio?
 

Yes. You can share your SIP portfolio. It should be reviewed in detail.

 

Fund selection must suit your goals, risk, and retirement timeline.

 

If SIPs are selected by self, mistakes may remain unnoticed.

 

Self-managed portfolios often carry duplication and poor diversification.

 

Review will ensure you hold right funds in correct proportion.

 

Regular rebalancing and fund replacement are also needed.

 

Avoid index funds. They copy the index. No expert decision-making involved.

 

Actively managed funds give better chances of outperformance.

 

A fund manager takes timely calls based on market data.

 

Direct Plans vs Regular Plans
 

Many people choose direct funds thinking returns will be more.

 

But direct plans give no advice, no monitoring, no fund review.

 

Wrong choices can erode gains, which you may not notice.

 

Investing through MFD with CFP support gives many advantages.

 

You get continuous guidance, strategy correction, and emotional discipline.

 

A small extra cost is worth it for safer long-term performance.

 

Use regular plans under a Certified Financial Planner to avoid mistakes.

 

Should You Hire a Certified Financial Planner?
 

Yes, it is the right time to do so.

 

You are close to retirement. No room for errors now.

 

One bad year or wrong withdrawal can hurt long-term stability.

 

A planner prepares a full retirement roadmap. Step-by-step.

 

Helps manage retirement income, investment allocation, and cashflow.

 

Plans for children’s education, marriage, and tax-saving.

 

Also prepares a Will, estate plan, and contingency system.

 

You have built wealth. A planner helps protect and grow it safely.

 

Other Action Points You Must Consider
 

Keep 6 months’ expenses in liquid mutual funds. That’s your emergency fund.

 

Keep track of new MF capital gains tax rules.

 

If equity MF gains exceed Rs.1.25 lakh in a year, excess is taxed at 12.5%.

 

If sold within one year, tax is 20% on profits.

 

For debt funds, all gains are taxed as per your income slab.

 

File taxes properly. Use Form 26AS and AIS to avoid mismatch.

 

Make a written Will. Register it if possible.

 

Update nominations in all mutual funds, FDs, and insurance.

 

Involve your spouse in all investment decisions. Keep them informed.

 

Retirement Income Management Strategy
 

Break your retirement portfolio into three buckets.

 

First: Emergency and liquidity. Use FDs and liquid funds here.

 

Second: Stable monthly income. Use PPF, debt mutual funds, and bonds.

 

Third: Long-term growth. Keep some mutual funds in equity.

 

Withdraw only what is needed. Keep rest invested.

 

Review once a year with your planner.

 

Children’s Education and Marriage Planning
 

PG for daughter is immediate. Use FD interest or surplus cash.

 

Don’t disturb mutual funds meant for retirement.

 

PhD is long-term. Plan SIPs separately for that.

 

Son’s education is 4–5 years away. Start new SIPs today.

 

Marriage cost is hard to predict. But start a separate investment for that now.

 

Keep gifts, bonuses, or land sale proceeds for such events.

 

Don’t allow such costs to delay or reduce your retirement corpus.

 

Final Insights
 

You are in a strong financial position. That itself is an advantage.

 

But with multiple goals ahead, clear planning becomes important.

 

Don’t self-manage complex portfolios at this stage.

 

Avoid real estate dependence. Use it only for living, not investing.

 

Stay away from index and direct funds. They don’t give personal strategy.

 

Increase SIPs each year. Tag each goal separately.

 

Use a Certified Financial Planner to guide your retirement strategy.

 

Update nominations, Will, and insurance coverage.

 

Monitor your retirement portfolio closely, but don’t panic with market ups and downs.

 

Stay invested. Think long-term. Follow a guided, reviewed plan.

 

You can retire comfortably and fulfil all family goals with peace of mind.

 

Best Regards,
 

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8322 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 07, 2025

Money
Dear sir, I am 46 yrs old investing in SIP of 25000 monthly last 4.5 Yrs in different companies mutual fund. I wants retire after 10 yrs and need a corpus of 5 crore. I have 2 children studying @ 6&8 grade. Invested in money back policy of 5-8 Lakh. 1C land purchased 2 yrs back. Comprehensive Health insurance is available for 5L yearly and Term insurance of 60L is available. Kindly let me know what sort of planning required.
Ans: It shows you are thinking ahead for your family and future. That itself is a great start.

Let’s break this down step by step.

 

Retirement Planning – 10 Years Away
 

You want Rs.5 crore in 10 years.

 

You are already investing Rs.25,000 monthly through SIPs. This is a good habit.

 

But just investing isn’t enough. The amount, fund selection, and review also matter.

 

Rs.5 crore is a big target. It needs a solid, focused investment plan.

 

You need to check whether Rs.25,000 per month is enough for this goal.

 

Based on typical growth rates, it may fall short. We need to increase SIPs gradually.

 

A Certified Financial Planner can help assess the exact shortfall. Then a step-wise plan can be made.

 

Your retirement plan should not depend on land. Land is not liquid. Selling it can take time.

 

Continue SIPs and increase it by 10% every year. That helps stay ahead of inflation.

 

Actively managed mutual funds should be selected. They give a better edge with expert fund manager decisions.

 

Index funds lack flexibility. They copy the index. No chance to beat the market.

 

With actively managed funds, the fund manager reacts fast to changes. That is an advantage.

 

Asset allocation should be reviewed every year. Rebalancing keeps the risk in control.

 

Keep a separate portfolio for retirement. Do not mix children’s education goal with this.

 

Children’s Education Planning
 

Your children are now in 6th and 8th grades.

 

In 6–8 years, you’ll need funds for their higher education.

 

Education costs are rising sharply. This cannot be ignored.

 

Start separate SIPs for their education goal now.

 

Do not depend on money-back policies for education.

 

These give low returns. Hardly beat inflation. Not suitable for education needs.

 

Surrender these policies. Reinvest the proceeds into mutual funds.

 

A Certified Financial Planner can guide on which policies to surrender and how.

 

Use mutual funds for better returns and flexibility.

 

Choose a mix of equity and balanced funds. This gives better growth with some safety.

 

Review this portfolio every year. Make changes if fund performance drops.

 

Never use retirement funds for education or other goals.

 

Keep clear boundaries between each financial goal.

 

Insurance Assessment – Life and Health
 

You have Rs.60 lakh term insurance. It is a good starting point.

 

But is it enough? Likely not.

 

A person at age 46 with children and a Rs.5 crore retirement goal needs more cover.

 

Term cover must be at least 12–15 times your annual income.

 

It should also cover children’s education and liabilities.

 

Top up your term insurance with an additional Rs.40–50 lakh at least.

 

Premiums are still manageable at your age.

 

Avoid ULIPs or money-back plans for life cover. They mix insurance and investment.

 

You have Rs.5 lakh health insurance. That is a positive step.

 

However, with rising medical costs, it is not enough.

 

Add a super top-up policy of Rs.10–15 lakh. It is cost-effective and gives added protection.

 

Ensure the entire family is covered under the policy.

 

Also keep some emergency fund in liquid funds for minor health expenses.

 

Emergency Fund and Contingency Planning
 

An emergency fund gives peace of mind.

 

It should cover at least 6 months of expenses.

 

Keep this in a liquid mutual fund or savings account.

 

Never invest emergency funds in equity or land.

 

Refill the fund if you use it anytime.

 

Existing Land Investment
 

You mentioned buying land two years ago.

 

It can be a personal asset. But not an investment.

 

Land does not generate regular income.

 

Selling land can take time. Liquidity is low.

 

Do not depend on land for your retirement or education goals.

 

Do not count land value in your net worth for investment planning.

 

Keep it as a reserve or personal utility asset only.

 

Money-Back Policies – Action Plan
 

You have Rs.5–8 lakh in money-back policies.

 

These offer low returns. Do not help in long-term wealth creation.

 

It is best to surrender these now. Don’t wait.

 

Reinvest that money into mutual funds through a Certified Financial Planner.

 

Use regular plans through MFDs. They offer continuous support and monitoring.

 

Direct mutual funds offer no guidance. That leads to mistakes and poor returns.

 

Regular funds give access to a CFP’s review and hand-holding.

 

Small cost difference, but better long-term results.

 

SIP Management – Next Steps
 

You are already investing Rs.25,000 monthly. That is commendable.

 

Increase it every year. This is called SIP step-up.

 

If your income rises, increase SIPs by 10–15% yearly.

 

This one habit helps you reach goals faster.

 

Choose 4–5 diversified equity funds. Review them every 6 months.

 

Use funds with consistent track records and experienced managers.

 

Avoid index funds. They are passive. No fund manager input.

 

Actively managed funds offer better opportunities.

 

Tax Planning – For Today and Tomorrow
 

Make use of Section 80C for tax savings. SIP in ELSS can help here.

 

Avoid locking too much in PPF or NSC. They are not flexible.

 

For capital gains tax, keep new rules in mind.

 

If you sell equity funds, gains above Rs.1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.

 

If sold before 1 year, gains are taxed at 20%.

 

For debt funds, all gains are taxed as per your income slab.

 

Always check tax implication before switching or redeeming funds.

 

Goal-Based Investment Planning
 

Link each SIP to a specific goal.

 

One SIP for retirement.

 

One SIP for child 1 education.

 

Another SIP for child 2 education.

 

Do not combine goals. That leads to confusion later.

 

Clear goal tagging helps track progress.

 

A Certified Financial Planner can prepare this map for you.

 

Use colour-coded tracking for each goal.

 

Will, Nomination, and Estate Planning
 

Make a basic Will. Even if your assets are small today.

 

Nominate properly in every investment and insurance.

 

Review nominations every 2 years.

 

Teach your spouse the basics of your financial plan.

 

Keep one folder with all details – policies, accounts, mutual funds.

 

Inform your family where the file is kept.

 

Three Yearly Review System
 

Review your financial plan every year.

 

Do it with the help of a Certified Financial Planner.

 

Track SIP growth. Are goals on track?

 

Rebalance asset allocation if equity grows too much.

 

Check insurance covers every 2 years.

 

Update Will, nominations, and goals if needed.

 

Final Insights
 

You have taken important first steps. That shows awareness.

 

But awareness needs a plan to be successful.

 

Surrender low-yielding policies. Reinvest wisely.

 

Keep land aside. Do not count on it for goals.

 

Increase SIPs steadily. Choose only actively managed funds.

 

Use regular mutual funds through a Certified Financial Planner.

 

Protect family with higher life and health insurance.

 

Separate SIPs for each goal. Link every investment to a purpose.

 

Review your plan once every year. Adjust when needed.

 

Your dream of Rs.5 crore and children’s education is possible.

 

But you need focused, guided steps to reach there.

 

Best Regards,
 

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x