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Kanchan Rai |552 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 13, 2024

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 09, 2024

Relationship

Hi, I am 28. Recently I was searching for some documents in my younger sister phone (she is 22) and I did not intended to, but I noticed she chat with a guy which was very sexual. My mind is very disturbed from the very moment. I thought of discussing this with Maa but I don't want to involve in this as this could make her uncomfortable. Am I overthinking or is this something common that we can find in girls of this age? I am also worried that she should not do anything which could bring a disgrace to our family. How can I resolve this?

Ans: Since you came across this unintentionally, it's important to respect her privacy. Bringing it up with her or with your mother might feel invasive and could harm the trust between you two. Instead, you could look for ways to be a supportive, non-judgmental presence in her life. Building open communication without mentioning what you saw could allow her to feel safe coming to you with her thoughts or concerns in the future.

If you're worried she might be making risky choices, you could have a casual, open-hearted conversation about relationships in general without focusing on her specifically. You might share your own experiences or insights, subtly encouraging her to make choices that align with her values and self-respect. This way, she feels your support and care without feeling judged or intruded upon.

It’s normal to be concerned about family reputation, but the healthiest approach here might be to empower her to make wise decisions herself rather than monitoring her behavior.

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Anu Krishna |1540 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 27, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 27, 2023Hindi

Relationship

Hello, I am father of 18-year daughter, she is 1 year engineering student and involve or doing time pass with one boy from her 12 class and share nudes from bathroom also boy sometimes demand Money as well. We found this from her Insta chat so how to handle this, please help me to solve this.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Deal with this very carefully as if you reprimand or object to this, she is only going to rebel even more.
Kindly involve her mother into this.
Encourage her to talk about it without judging her or instructing her on what to do. I am sure she is already terrified of the boy's threats of blackmailing.
Also, have you considered of reporting this to the cops? Most parents don't want to as they are worried about the consequences their daughters have to go through. But, how else can these 'creeps' be stopped.

With a lot of love and support from you, your daughter will regain strength to realize that she had made some poor choices and that she has the choice now to rework all of them to pave a better path to walk on. You don't have to tell her what to do as she already knows it. She is just scared...
Just support and love her; instructions can wait...though your anxieties I am sure is hitting the roof. But, remember, everything works when people are surrounded with love. Your daughter simply needs this right NOW.

All the best!

Anu Krishna |1540 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 17, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 14, 2023Hindi

Relationship

Hi Anu, I am a father of recently turned 13 daughter. We had the most amazing relationship. She was my pet and I would go to any extent to meet her demands. She is not good in studies as compared to my elder son. Still we never pressurised her. Suddenly her school called us to inform that she was on social media and have had an affair..she also kissed the boy. We are shocked ..while we expect hormonal changes and attraction at this stage but kissing and bragging about it is something which is bothering us. We had a call chat with her she admitted everything but had no guilt or shyness. She is known to drop tear but during the conversation she was adamantly confident and giving us examples of othe girls. My wife has been caching her since two years on how things are and how girls should be careful but seems she is just nodding and still doing same thing. I am not only shocked but also concerned that she might repeat it again as she neither felt or said sorry about it but also was completely apologetic ..what should we do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
'Call chat'?
Why not an 'in-person' chat? Is she away in a hostel or boarding school? If YES, kindly drop everything and be with her.
Surely, she's seeking attention from the other gender like any other teen at this age but what alarms me is the fact that she is callous in her attitude towards the entire episode. Defending her stance only means that she is in unwanted company and is justifying her behaviour as 'fitting in with peers'.
Handle this with butter fingers; give some-take some...yelling and complaining and trying to make her feel guilty is only going to make her repeat her behaviour so that she proves you right...
Spend quality time with her filling it with love, attention and support which is what she is perhaps seeking outside. This can be helped by seeking a professional who has experience handling adolescent behavioural challenges. Surely, this is her way of fitting in and experimenting but something that is also filling in an inadequacy. I cannot be sure of this, but just sharing from my experience of handling adolescents. So, first drop everything and be with her. Give her even more love that will tell her that her parents will be with her no matter what! Yeah, long lectures don't work at that age...SIGH...
This actually makes them question their choices and get back on the right path...And please do seek the help of a professional at the earliest...

All the best!

Aruna Agarwal | Answer |Ask -Follow

Child and Parenting Counsellor - Answered on Dec 26, 2023

Question by anonymous - Dec 23, 2023Hindi

Health

i have a 12.5 year old daughter who is crazy behind a guy ... i have access to her chats but am unable to confront her thinking about the repercussions ... do we just leave this situation to time thinking she is just 12 years old and give her that space ... or you think i should go and talk to the guys parents in a polite way that we need to handle this situation. A bit worried to share this to the guys parents thinking what if the message spreads like fire in her school .. she will be shattered and will be low on confidence. I just need a solution to this ... she is too young to get into all these things ... we tried talking to her not on this subject but pressurizing her the importance of studies etc ... but nothing seems to work. Do you suggest to disconnect the internet? she has no personal mobile phone nor do we intend to give her till she is 15-16.

Ans: You can gently talk to her about her feelings and emotions. How she feels about her classmates and talk about boys as being friends. When you talk to her from a non judgemental space, she will be more open to receive from you.

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Archana Deshpande |102 Answers |Ask -Follow

Image Coach, Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Question by Sunil - Sep 10, 2024Hindi

Career

Hi Mam, Hope you are doing well. I am very worried about my son who is now 12.5 years old and studying in 7th standard in a very reputed school. Since childhood, he has no interest in studies, unless we doesn't seat in front of him, he doesn't study. Every teacher from his kindergarten days upto now has the same complaint that he is doesn't pay attention in class and the result is he doesn't get good marks in the exam. When we scold him for studies, he does it for that particular time only and then get back to his non-interest mode again and start to run from studies. He will play video games, goes to play around with his friends, he will find some or the other reason for not doing studies or homework. The irony is that he is not interested in any sports or any other kind of activities. In every summer holidays, we make him to join some sports or music classes, but there also he doesn't show interest and do things just for the sake of showing. From last year, we have started sending him to tuitions also, but no change in attitude. This year we have found a teacher of his reputed school who is retired and taking tuitions, we are sending him to her and she is charging a big amount for tuitions. please guide how can we change his attitude and make him more serious in any activity he does as he doesn't have interest in anything (we have observed doing everything we can).

Ans: Hello Sunil!!

I am doing great, thank you for asking, God bless you!

I can totally understand when you say you are worried.

Your son is 12.5, he will soon be a teenager. There will be different challenges, I want you to read up on parenting a teenager and be ready to handle him well.

The problem as I see it is that everyone of you, his teachers included have made studies like a burden for him.... and subjected the young child to a lot of anxiety, he just wants to run away form it....
"Every teacher from his kindergarten days upto now has the same complaint that he is doesn't pay attention in class".... this statement of yours... it is the teacher's duty to ensure the child listens to him/her, how can she start labeling a child like this. From a young age your son has been conditioned to believe that he is not not good in studies, he doesn't focus and he doesn't sit in one place. All my sympathies are with your son...every child comes with immense potential and it's our duty as parents and teachers to nurture the child.

The following is what I propose so that we bring him back to loving to learn ( not score marks, that should never be the barometer)-
1. Love your child the way he is now
2. Give him lot of positive strokes
3. Have one on one sessions for any activity you plan for him... let him choose the activity, empower him
4. choose a teacher, who can get along with him and help him develop a positive attitude towards studies and life in general
5. look for a school where they nurture him... not just a reputed one...less number of students and a teacher who is invested in her/ his students,

If you can connect with me, I can help him. Have had many a students in this kind situation.
This is my website..
https://transformme.co.in/

Loads of best wishes to the whole family..

Archana Deshpande |102 Answers |Ask -Follow

Image Coach, Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 12, 2025Hindi

Career

Hello mam, I am a BSc IT graduate. I have applied for a job at Credit Suisse that I aspire to crack and learn from. I have cleared the test and technical rounds and will soon be appearing for a personal interview at the Mumbai office. What kind of questions should I be prepared for? I only have 3 months of internship experience.

Ans: Hey, first of all congratulations on clearing so many rounds and reaching the personal interview round!!

Now regarding the preparations...

1. Be impeccably dressed for the interview, this shows you care. Also you need to appear professional and confident
2. Enter the interview room with confidence
3. Enjoy the whole process of being interviewed, it's about you, that's why it is called the personal interview
4. Prepare the questions that are relevant to your role and the company you will be working for. Know a little about the company's competitors
5. Prepare for the usual questions, tell us a little about yourself or introduce yourself, what are your strengths and weaknesses, why should we select you, etc .... these questions are for you to showcase the real you...in a positive light. This is where you show your authenticity
6. Prepare for the Q and A with someone asking you the questions and you replying

Have the confidence, you have come so far, I am sure you'll clear this round too!!

All the very best!

Dr Dipankar Dutta |909 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 22, 2025Hindi

Career

Dear sir, my son has scored 99.614 in JEE Mains 1st session 2025. If he attempts 2nd attempt of 2025 & score below first session,which score does NTA consider. Is it averaging both scores? Please help.

Ans: No, NTA considers the best score out of both attempts, not the average.

Dr Dipankar Dutta |909 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 26, 2025Hindi

Career

As my daughter scored jee mains 98.75 obc (ncl) can we csc in niit

Ans: Your daughter has a strong chance of getting CSE in mid-tier NITs and might get lower-ranked NITs in initial rounds. If she prefers top NITs, she can consider branches like CSE (specializations), IT.

Dr Dipankar Dutta |909 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 26, 2025Hindi

Career

Category: General Percentile:99.741 Can I get CS at tire 1 Nit and Tier 1 IIIT

Ans: You have a very strong chance of getting CSE at top-tier NITs like Warangal, Surathkal, and Calicut and also at IIIT Allahabad, IIIT Delhi. See previous years' cut off

Dr Dipankar Dutta |909 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Question by Bagmita - Feb 26, 2025Hindi

Career

My daughter got 94.9 percentile in jee mains session 1 2025. Her domicile state is Assam and her category is general. Will she get nit silchar any branch

Ans: Yes, your daughter has a fair chance of getting admission in some branches. See previous years' cut off

Dr Dipankar Dutta |909 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 04, 2025Hindi

Career

I got 93.78 percentile. I belong to general can I still qualify for jee adavance

Prof Suvasish Mukhopadhyay |458 Answers |Ask -Follow

Career Counsellor - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Question by Poonam - Feb 28, 2025Hindi

Career

Which is the best engineering college from cuet with strong alumni network and good placement?

Ans: I can't comment,because if I comment it will be considered as a biased comment.

Prof Suvasish Mukhopadhyay |458 Answers |Ask -Follow

Career Counsellor - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 28, 2025Hindi

Career

Sir I scored 88 percentile in mains 1 session and belong to obc catagory . Which college I get to btech CSE or NIT with lower branch

Ans: In low ranked NITs and State Government Engineering Colleges you will have good chance.

Prof Suvasish Mukhopadhyay |458 Answers |Ask -Follow

Career Counsellor - Answered on Mar 04, 2025

Question by dr - Feb 24, 2025Hindi

Career

Is school integrated program of gravity good for jee in lko

Ans: Your question is not clear

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