Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help

25-Year-Old Woman Wonders: Should I Invest in a Relationship with a Mixed-Signal Boyfriend?

Shalini

Shalini Singh  |149 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Jul 17, 2024

Shalini Singh is the founder of andwemet, an online matchmaking service for urban Indians living in India and overseas. After graduating from college as a kindergarten teacher, Singh worked at various firms specialising in marketing strategy, digital marketing and public relations before finding her niche as an entrepreneur. In 2008, she founded Galvanise PR, an independent communications and public relations. In 2019, she launched andwemet.
... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jul 17, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship

I am 25 F. I had proposed my now boyfriend. For initial 1 year he played really hard to get and gave me mixed signal. This negatively affected me. Now he had accepted that he has feeling for me. But in the process of chasing him i have lost the respect and trust I had for him. I dont have feeling for him anymore. Even he showed love and care for a day and than once again started giving me mixed signals. What should I do? Should I invest in this relationship? Should I be patient?

Ans: You don't have feelings for him, you need to decide what you want - either bring in the feelings or move on. BTW trust is lost if he has cheated you, also keep in mind he was not in the same place as you - you liked him, he took his time to like you back. All the best.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |583 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 28, 2023

Listen
Relationship
I am confused with my relationship. Im in relationship frm last 1 month . I met him via social media . Actually now a days i feel he is not serious with me . Im not getting the good vibes from him. Wht should i do now
Ans: Hello Priyanka.

It's understandable that you are feeling confused about your relationship, especially if you're not getting good vibes from your partner. Here are a few suggestions on what you can do:

Communicate your concerns: It's important to communicate with your partner and express your concerns. Talk about how you feel and ask them how they feel about the relationship. Honest communication can help clear up any misunderstandings or doubts you may have.

Evaluate the relationship: Take some time to reflect on your relationship and evaluate whether it's meeting your needs and expectations. If you feel like the relationship isn't fulfilling, it may be time to reconsider your options.

Take a step back: It's okay to take a step back and give yourself some space to think about the relationship. This can help you gain clarity and perspective on the situation.

Trust your instincts: If you feel like something isn't right, trust your instincts. Your intuition can often guide you towards making the right decision for yourself.

Remember, it's important to prioritize your own well-being and happiness in any relationship. Don't hesitate to reach out to friends or a trusted confidante for support and advice.

PS. It's always advisable to do proper due diligence if things are virtual. You should know and figure out who your partner is in real life. We all know virtual world has its own drawbacks.

Best of luck.

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |583 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 05, 2023

Listen
Relationship
Hello mam!! I have been in a relationship since last 3 years and the guy work like normally but expect from me to not work after marriage as according to him it's not a good thing. I sacrifice all mu thoughts and value for him whatever he said i did but he started disrespecting me from words because of his frustration in life. I was like maybe he will not gonna do like this next time but cycle keeps going from like5 to 6 month and finally i decided to stand leave he also follows a pattern to be with me for a time and zoned out himself for like a month and suddenly came and behave normally i was accepting that even without questioning but now he got a decent job and want to marry me with the above conditions he was already made. So what should i do i don't want to think twice with my decisions but it hurt as well
Ans: My Dear Nikita,

It sounds like you have been in a challenging situation for some time, where you have been sacrificing your values and thoughts for your partner, and he has been disrespecting you with his words and behavior. It's important to remember that no one deserves to be treated with disrespect in a relationship.

It's understandable that it hurts to think about leaving the relationship, especially after investing so much time and effort into it. However, you need to prioritize your own well-being and happiness, and it seems like this relationship is not fulfilling that for you.

It's important to have a clear and honest conversation with your partner about your feelings and concerns. Let him know that his behavior has been hurtful, and that you cannot accept his condition of not working after marriage. It's important to communicate your boundaries and what you need from the relationship.

If he is not willing to respect your boundaries and make changes to improve the relationship, it may be time to consider ending it. Remember that you deserve to be in a relationship where you are respected, valued, and your needs are met. It may be difficult, but prioritizing your own well-being is important for your long-term happiness.

..Read more

Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  |119 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 24, 2023

Listen
Relationship
Hello sir!! I have been in a relationship since last 3 years and the guy work like normally but expect from me to not work after marriage as according to him it's not a good thing. I sacrifice all mu thoughts and value for him whatever he said i did but he started disrespecting me from words because of his frustration in life. I was like maybe he will not gonna do like this next time but cycle keeps going from like5 to 6 month and finally i decided to stand leave he also follows a pattern to be with me for a time and zoned out himself for like a month and suddenly came and behave normally i was accepting that even without questioning but now he got a decent job and want to marry me with the above conditions he was already made. So what should i do i don't want to think twice with my decisions but it hurt as well
Ans: I'm sorry to hear that you are in a difficult situation. It is never okay for someone to disrespect you or your values, regardless of their frustration in life. It's important to remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and dignity in any relationship.

It sounds like you have already made the decision to leave the relationship, which is a brave and important step towards taking care of yourself. It may be helpful to remind yourself of the reasons why you made that decision, and to focus on your own values and needs.

If you are still feeling hurt and uncertain about the situation, it may be helpful to seek support from trusted friends or family members, or consider speaking with a therapist. They can help you process your emotions and provide guidance as you navigate this difficult time.

Remember, you have the power to make choices that are best for you and your well-being. Trust yourself and prioritize your own needs and happiness.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Samraat

Samraat Jadhav  |2272 Answers  |Ask -

Stock Market Expert - Answered on May 07, 2025

Dr Nagarajan J S K

Dr Nagarajan J S K   |373 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on May 07, 2025

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8324 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 07, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 07, 2025
Money
Sir, I wqnted your advise, regarding an investment. My building is going for re-development, there is a additional flat sale for about 1cr, which will be ready in about 3 years. Please can you advise is it worth to invest 1cr in additional flat, i have savings of about 1cr, or should i keep the 1cr as Fixed Deposit. I do not have knowledge about investment in mutual funds or SIP. Thanks to advise.
Ans: It's commendable that you're considering the best investment route for your Rs. 1 crore savings. Let's evaluate the options you've mentioned and explore a comprehensive approach to wealth creation.

Understanding Your Investment Options
1. Investing in the Additional Flat

Illiquidity Concerns: Real estate investments are typically illiquid. Selling a property can take time and may not fetch the expected price.

Maintenance and Other Costs: Owning an additional flat comes with recurring expenses like maintenance charges, property taxes, and potential renovation costs.

Market Volatility: Property prices can fluctuate based on various factors, including economic conditions and government policies.

Rental Income Uncertainty: If you're considering renting out the flat, rental yields in many Indian cities are relatively low compared to the property's value.

2. Keeping the Amount in Fixed Deposits (FDs)

Low Returns: FDs offer fixed returns, but these may not outpace inflation, leading to a decrease in real purchasing power over time.

Tax Implications: Interest earned from FDs is taxable as per your income slab, which can further reduce the net returns.

Lack of Flexibility: Premature withdrawal from FDs can attract penalties, limiting liquidity.

Exploring Mutual Funds as an Alternative
Given that you're new to mutual funds and SIPs, it's essential to understand their potential benefits:

Professional Management: Mutual funds are managed by experienced fund managers who make investment decisions based on thorough research.

Diversification: By investing in a mutual fund, your money is spread across various assets, reducing risk.

Liquidity: Most mutual funds offer high liquidity, allowing you to redeem your investment when needed.

Potential for Higher Returns: Historically, mutual funds, especially equity-oriented ones, have offered higher returns over the long term compared to traditional instruments like FDs.

Tax Efficiency: Mutual funds can be more tax-efficient, especially with the benefits available under certain sections of the Income Tax Act.

Recommended Approach
Considering your current situation and the pros and cons of each investment option:

Avoid Investing in the Additional Flat: Given the illiquidity, associated costs, and potential market volatility, investing in another property may not be the most efficient use of your funds.

Limit Exposure to FDs: While FDs offer safety, the returns may not be sufficient to meet long-term financial goals, especially after accounting for inflation and taxes.

Consider Mutual Funds for Wealth Creation:

Start with a Lump Sum Investment: Allocate a portion of your Rs. 1 crore savings into mutual funds, focusing on a mix of equity and debt funds based on your risk appetite.

Initiate SIPs: Set up Systematic Investment Plans to invest a fixed amount regularly, benefiting from rupee cost averaging and disciplined investing.

Consult a Certified Financial Planner: Given your unfamiliarity with mutual funds, seeking guidance from a certified professional can help tailor an investment strategy aligned with your financial goals.

Final Insights
Your initiative to seek advice before making a significant investment decision is commendable. By steering clear of additional real estate investments and limiting exposure to low-yield instruments like FDs, you can explore avenues like mutual funds that offer the potential for higher returns and greater flexibility. Engaging with a certified financial planner can further ensure that your investment strategy is well-aligned with your long-term financial objectives.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x