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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7915 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 13, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Asked by Anonymous - May 08, 2024Hindi
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Hi Sir/Madam, I have 1) HDFC Index S&P BSE sensex fund. 2) Quant Midcap Fund. 3) Nippon India Large Cap Fund. 4) Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund. 5) Kotak Emerging Equity fund. 6) HDFC Small Cap Fund. 7) Navi Nifty 50 Index Fund. I have a plan to invest for 10 years monthly 1000 in each fund please review the portfolio and advise for any adjustments if required.

Ans: Portfolio Review and Recommendations

Analyzing Your Portfolio

Your portfolio consists of a mix of index funds and actively managed funds across various market capitalizations and sectors. Here's a brief assessment of each fund:

HDFC Index S&P BSE Sensex Fund: This index fund aims to replicate the performance of the S&P BSE Sensex. It provides broad exposure to large-cap stocks in the Indian market.

Quant Midcap Fund: This actively managed fund focuses on mid-cap stocks, offering potential for higher returns but with increased volatility compared to large caps.

Nippon India Large Cap Fund: As the name suggests, this fund primarily invests in large-cap stocks, providing stability and steady growth potential over the long term.

Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund: A flexi-cap fund allows the flexibility to invest across market capitalizations based on market conditions. It aims for capital appreciation by investing in a diversified portfolio of equities and related instruments.

Kotak Emerging Equity Fund: This fund focuses on emerging companies with potential for rapid growth. It offers exposure to small and mid-cap segments of the market.

HDFC Small Cap Fund: Investing in small-cap companies can be rewarding but comes with higher risk. This fund aims to capitalize on the growth potential of small-cap stocks.

Navi Nifty 50 Index Fund: Another index fund that tracks the Nifty 50 index, providing exposure to the top 50 companies listed on the National Stock Exchange (NSE).

Recommendations for Adjustments

Diversification: Your portfolio seems well-diversified across different market segments. However, you might consider reducing overlap by consolidating similar funds. For example, you already have exposure to large caps through index funds and actively managed funds. You could consider consolidating your large-cap exposure to one or two funds for simplicity.
Active vs. Passive Management:
While you've included both actively managed mutual funds and index funds (ETFs) in your portfolio, it's important to understand the differences between the two. Actively managed funds aim to outperform the market through active stock selection and portfolio management, while index funds passively track a specific index's performance.
Benefits of Actively Managed Funds:
Actively managed funds offer the potential for higher returns compared to index funds, especially during market inefficiencies or when skilled fund managers can identify lucrative investment opportunities. Additionally, active management allows for flexibility in portfolio construction and adjustments based on market conditions.
Potential Disadvantages of Index Funds:
While index funds offer low expense ratios and broad market exposure, they may lack the potential for outperformance compared to actively managed funds. Additionally, they're subject to tracking error, which occurs when the fund's performance deviates from the index it's designed to replicate.

Risk Management: While mid-cap and small-cap funds offer higher growth potential, they also come with increased volatility. Ensure that your risk tolerance aligns with the exposure to these segments. Consider balancing with large-cap funds for stability.

Regular Review: Periodically review your portfolio's performance and market conditions. Rebalance if necessary to maintain your desired asset allocation and risk profile.

Long-Term Perspective: Investing for 10 years is a good strategy, but remain focused on your long-term goals. Avoid making frequent changes based on short-term market movements.

Final Thoughts

Your portfolio shows a thoughtful approach to diversification and investment strategy. With regular monitoring and adjustments as needed, you're well-positioned to achieve your financial goals over the long term.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7915 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 13, 2024

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Hi Sir, I have 1) HDFC Index S&P BSE sensex fund. 2) Quant Midcap Fund. 3) Nippon India Large Cap Fund. 4) Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund. 5) Kotak Emerging Equity fund. 6) HDFC Small Cap Fund. 7) Navi Nifty 50 Index Fund. I have a plan to invest for 10 years monthly 1000 in each fund please review the portfolio and advise for any adjustments if required.
Ans: Portfolio Review and Recommendations

Diversification Overview:

Your portfolio comprises a well-diversified mix of mutual funds spanning various market segments.
Diversification is crucial for managing risk and optimizing returns over the long term.
Fund Assessment:

HDFC Index S&P BSE Sensex Fund:
Provides exposure to top companies listed on the BSE.
Index funds lack potential for outperformance compared to actively managed funds.
Quant Midcap Fund:
Actively managed fund targeting mid-cap segment.
Offers potential for higher returns through strategic stock selection.
Nippon India Large Cap Fund:
Primarily invests in large-cap stocks for stability and growth potential.
Suitable for investors with lower risk tolerance due to lower volatility.
Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund:
Offers flexibility to invest across market capitalizations.
Actively managed approach aims for alpha generation.
Kotak Emerging Equity Fund:
Focuses on the emerging segment for higher growth potential.
Higher volatility associated with mid and small-cap stocks.
HDFC Small Cap Fund:
Targets small-cap companies with potential for significant growth.
Higher risk due to increased volatility in small-cap segment.
Navi Nifty 50 Index Fund:
Mirrors the performance of the Nifty 50 index.
Low-cost exposure to market benchmarks but may underperform actively managed funds.
Long-Term Perspective:

With a 10-year investment horizon, your choice of funds aligns with long-term wealth creation objectives.
Actively managed funds have the potential to outperform market benchmarks over the long term.
Portfolio Adjustment Recommendations:

Regular Monitoring:
Review portfolio performance periodically to ensure alignment with financial goals.
Monitor fund performance relative to peers and benchmarks.
Rebalancing:
Consider rebalancing portfolio to maintain desired asset allocation.
Rebalancing helps manage risk and optimize returns over time.
Replace Underperformers:
Identify underperforming funds that may warrant replacement.
Seek opportunities to enhance portfolio performance through strategic changes.
Investment Discipline:

Stay disciplined during market fluctuations to avoid impulsive decisions.
Long-term investing coupled with disciplined approach enhances wealth accumulation potential.
Conclusion:

Your diversified portfolio reflects a prudent investment strategy for long-term wealth creation.
Regular monitoring and periodic adjustments are essential to stay on track towards achieving financial goals.
Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7915 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 20, 2024

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Sir, I have the following Mutual Funds SIP monthly amount- 1) Motilal Oswal Midcap Fund - 3000 2) Nippon India Large Cap Fund - 3000 3) Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund - 3000 4) Quant Infrastructure Fund - 3000 5) Quant Multi Asset Fund - 3000 6) Quant Small Cap Fund - 3000 7) Axis Small Cap Fund - 2000 please review my portfolio and advise, if any changes required.
Ans: Let's dive into a detailed analysis of your existing mutual fund SIP portfolio to identify potential areas for optimization and ensure alignment with your financial goals.

Assessing Your Current Portfolio
Your current portfolio consists of a diversified mix of mutual funds across various categories, including mid-cap, large-cap, flexi-cap, infrastructure, multi-asset, and small-cap funds. This demonstrates a well-rounded approach to investment diversification.

Evaluating Fund Performance and Risk Profile
Performance: Evaluate the historical performance of each fund relative to its benchmark index and peer group. Look for consistent performers with a track record of delivering above-average returns over the long term.

Risk Profile: Assess the risk profile of each fund based on factors such as volatility, standard deviation, and downside capture ratio. Ensure that the risk level aligns with your risk tolerance and investment horizon.

Identifying Redundancies and Overlaps
Review your portfolio for any redundancies or overlaps in investment objectives and underlying holdings. Eliminate duplicate exposures to similar asset classes or sectors to streamline your portfolio and reduce unnecessary risk.

Addressing Fund Selection and Allocation
Mid-Cap and Small-Cap Funds: Mid-cap and small-cap funds offer the potential for high growth but come with increased volatility. Evaluate your exposure to these segments and consider rebalancing if necessary to manage risk.

Large-Cap and Flexi-Cap Funds: Large-cap and flexi-cap funds provide stability and diversification. Ensure adequate allocation to these segments to mitigate volatility and capitalize on market opportunities.

Sectoral and Theme Funds: Review your exposure to sectoral and theme funds, such as infrastructure and multi-asset funds. While these funds can offer niche opportunities, they also carry concentrated risks. Consider reducing exposure or diversifying across sectors for better risk management.

Streamlining and Rebalancing Your Portfolio
Based on the assessment above, consider streamlining your portfolio by consolidating redundant funds and rebalancing allocations to align with your risk-return objectives. Focus on retaining high-quality funds with strong track records and reallocating resources to optimize diversification and minimize risk.

Monitoring and Reviewing Your Portfolio Regularly
Lastly, commit to monitoring your portfolio regularly and reviewing your investment strategy periodically to ensure continued alignment with your financial goals and evolving market conditions. Stay informed about fund performance, economic trends, and regulatory changes to make informed decisions.

Conclusion
In conclusion, while your current mutual fund portfolio demonstrates diversification and a proactive approach to investment, there may be opportunities to optimize allocations, address redundancies, and enhance risk-adjusted returns. By conducting a comprehensive review and making strategic adjustments, you can position your portfolio for long-term success and achieve your financial objectives.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7915 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 30, 2024Hindi
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Hi Sir, I am investing since 8 yrs. I want to get review on my below portfolio. Please guide me. 1- Kotak Flexi Cap/10000Rs- Planning to exit and start in Parag Parikh Flexi Cap 2- Mirae Emerging Bluechip Fund 25000 3- Kotak Emerging Equity Fund 31000 4- Nippon India Small Cap 25000 5- Canara Rob Small Cap 10000- Just 1 yr before started but thinking to choose different strategy investing fund like Quant Small Cap Should I make these changes or continue same portfolio only or will you recommend some other fund. These all are for long term says 20-25 yrs. 6- HDFC Balanced Advantage Fund 5000 As Long term RD for 5 yrs only Please guide me
Ans: I appreciate your dedication to building a strong investment portfolio over the years. It is clear you have put considerable thought into your financial planning. Let’s assess your portfolio and the proposed changes. I’ll ensure the analysis is straightforward and tailored to your long-term goals.

Portfolio Evaluation
Your current portfolio includes a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds. This diversified approach can be beneficial for long-term growth. Here's a detailed evaluation:

Flexi Cap Funds
You have Kotak Flexi Cap and plan to switch to Parag Parikh Flexi Cap. Flexi cap funds provide flexibility by investing across market capitalizations. This strategy helps in adapting to market changes. Parag Parikh Flexi Cap has a strong track record. However, before switching, consider if the new fund aligns with your risk tolerance and investment objectives.

Mid-Cap and Small-Cap Funds
Mid-cap and small-cap funds are more volatile but offer higher growth potential. Mirae Emerging Bluechip and Kotak Emerging Equity are robust mid-cap funds with good historical performance. Small-cap funds like Nippon India Small Cap and Canara Rob Small Cap are also included. It's wise to monitor their performance periodically and ensure they fit your risk profile.

Balanced Advantage Fund
The HDFC Balanced Advantage Fund provides a balanced exposure to equity and debt, reducing overall risk. This fund is suitable for moderate risk-takers seeking stability and growth.

Proposed Changes
Exiting Kotak Flexi Cap
Switching from Kotak Flexi Cap to Parag Parikh Flexi Cap is a strategic move. Parag Parikh Flexi Cap has shown consistent performance and a unique investment strategy. Ensure this fund complements your overall portfolio and aligns with your risk tolerance.

Small Cap Funds
You have two small-cap funds: Nippon India Small Cap and Canara Rob Small Cap. Small-cap funds are highly volatile and risky. Consolidating into one robust small-cap fund can reduce complexity and manage risk better. Quant Small Cap is known for its performance, so replacing Canara Rob with Quant could be a good decision.

Recommendations
Maintain a Diversified Portfolio
Diversification helps manage risk and enhance returns. Your current mix of flexi cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds is well-diversified. Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio to stay aligned with your goals.

Regular Monitoring
Regular monitoring of your funds' performance is crucial. Assess the performance of each fund against its benchmark and peers. This ensures your investments continue to meet your expectations.

Risk Tolerance
Ensure your portfolio aligns with your risk tolerance. Mid-cap and small-cap funds are more volatile, so be prepared for market fluctuations. Balanced advantage funds can provide stability and reduce overall portfolio risk.

Long-Term Strategy
Consistent Investing
Your long-term horizon of 20-25 years is ideal for equity investments. Continue your systematic investment plans (SIPs) to benefit from rupee cost averaging and compounding.

Review Annually
Annual portfolio reviews with a Certified Financial Planner can ensure your investments are on track. Adjustments based on life changes, market conditions, and financial goals can optimize your portfolio.

Conclusion
Your portfolio is well-structured with a mix of funds. The proposed changes can enhance performance and align with your long-term goals. Regular monitoring, diversification, and alignment with risk tolerance are key to successful investing.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

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Dr Nagarajan Jsk

Dr Nagarajan Jsk   |237 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Career
My granddaughter is preparing for NEET 2025. She has born in Telangana and studied upto 1st class in Telangana. Due to her father’s overseas assignment at USA she moved to USA and studied upto 10th class there. The family moved to India in 2023. So she is now doing Intermediate now in Telangana. My question is whether she comes to be local for Telangana state or not for NEET admissions.
Ans: Hi Prabhakara,

Greetings!

Your situation is quite unique. Your granddaughter was born in Telangana and is now pursuing her +1 education there after a gap of nine years. However, according to the government norms for NEET 2024, meeting the requirements to establish domicile in Telangana may be challenging.

NEET Domicile Criteria
In the context of MBBS and BDS admissions for state quota seats in Telangana, it is important to understand the distinctions between local and non-local candidates as stipulated by the Telangana NEET admission rules for the year 2024. The local status is further subdivided into areas associated with Osmania University (OU), Andhra University (AU), and Sri Venkateswara University (SVU). AU’s local area comprises seven districts, while SVU’s area encompasses five districts. Non-local candidates are exclusively eligible for 15% of unreserved seats, whereas local candidates can vie for both the 15% unreserved seats and the remaining 85% of seats allocated within their respective local areas.

Telangana Local Area Candidates:
Students hailing from the districts falling under AU, SVU, or OU regions are considered local area NEET domicile applicants for MBBS/BDS admissions in local institutions, as well as any other educational institutions under the purview of the State Government situated within these local areas.
AU Local Area: Srikakulam, Vizianagaram, Visakhapatnam, East Godavari, West Godavari, Krishna, Guntur, and Prakasham.
OU Local Area: Adilabad, Hyderabad, Rangareddy, Karimnagar, Khammam, Mahaboobnagar, Medak, Nalgonda, Nizamabad, and Warangal.
SVU Local Area: Ananthapur, Kadapa, Kurnool, Chittoor, and Nellore.
NEET Domicile Criteria for Telangana:
To qualify as a local candidate, applicants must fulfill one of the following criteria:
1. Studied in a school/college within the local area for a minimum continuous period of 4 years immediately preceding the year they appear for the relevant qualifying examination.
2. Resided within the local area for a minimum continuous period of 4 years immediately preceding the year they appear for the relevant qualifying examination.
For candidates who do not meet the above criteria but have studied in educational institutions within the state for a minimum of 7 consecutive academic years, ending with the year of application for NEET, the following conditions apply:
– They are considered local in relation to the local area where they have studied for the maximum number of years out of the said 7 years.
– If the period of study in two local areas is equal, they may choose either for local status.
– If they have not studied in any educational institutions in the state but have resided in any local area or two local areas (for an equal period) for a minimum continuous period of 7 years, they may be considered local.
The following categories can apply for the 15% unreserved seats:
1. Candidates who have resided in the state for a total period of ten years, excluding periods of study outside the state, or whose parents have resided in the state for a total period of ten years, excluding periods of employment outside the state.
2. Candidates whose parents are employed by the state or Central Government, Public Sector Corporations, local bodies, Universities, Educational institutions, and similar quasi-public institutions within the state.
3. Candidates whose spouses are employees of the state or Central Government, Public Sector corporations, local bodies, Universities, Educational institutions recognized by the Government or University, or other competent authorities, and similar quasi-Government Institutions within the state.
Domicile Criteria for Management Quota Seats:
Candidates from across the country are eligible to apply for Management Quota seats (Category B and C-NRI) if they meet the requisite subject and qualifying mark criteria in their 10+2 education.
Applicants who have completed their qualifying education outside Telangana state must provide a “Certificate of Equivalence” from the Board of Intermediate Education of Telangana.
Candidates who have completed their qualifying education outside India must provide a “Certificate of Equivalence” issued by the Association of Indian Universities, New Delhi, and the Board of Intermediate Education of Telangana.
Given the details above, your granddaughter would need to have resided in Telangana for a minimum of four years to obtain a residence certificate. Since she was born before the state formation, I recommend consulting with a Notary Public to explore potential benefits or exceptions. This is my suggestion.

...Read more

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Asked by Anonymous - Sep 02, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am an SC and my gf is brahmin, we are in love for more than 2 years and decided to marry, i convinced my parents. But her parents are cruel in this aspect only, they threaten her of her life and threatens me to complain in police, And anyone can tell that this is wrong but as parents are willing to do anything for their children, same is true with their children, I am afraid if we include authorities things might turn bad especially with our parents. They threaten her can make her say no to me if we take it legally even though she doesn’t want to. I am financial independent but she has spent her entire life (age 29) in her house, what can we do?
Ans: Right now, the most important thing is her safety. If her parents are threatening her life or their own, this is not just emotional blackmail—it’s a serious matter. You need to be very careful in handling this, as forcing a confrontation might make them act irrationally. The key is to ensure that she is safe and mentally strong enough to withstand their pressure.

Since she has never lived outside her home, she may feel emotionally trapped, making it easier for her parents to manipulate her. She needs support—emotionally and, if needed, physically—to make a decision based on what she truly wants, not out of fear. Talk to her about the worst-case scenarios and how she would handle them. Would she be able to leave if things got too dangerous? Does she have someone in her family or social circle who might support her?

If her safety is at risk, you may need to consider helping her get a temporary safe space where she can think clearly. It could be a trusted friend’s house, a working women’s hostel, or even reaching out to women’s rights organizations that help in cases like this.

Taking legal action is tricky in such cases, as coercion can make her parents force her into saying things she doesn’t mean. Instead of rushing into legal intervention, consider gathering evidence—texts, recordings (if legal in your region), or anything that proves coercion or threats. This will help if things escalate.

If you both are truly committed, then marriage under the Special Marriage Act can be an option, but only if she is mentally and emotionally prepared for the backlash. She will need to stand strong, and you both need to have a plan for what comes next. How will she deal with the emotional toll? Where will she stay after marriage? What if her parents try to contact her after marriage? These are tough questions, but answering them now will help you prepare.

You are not alone in this. Many couples have faced similar situations, and while it is heartbreaking, some have succeeded in making it through. The key is patience, emotional strength, and ensuring that no one is in immediate danger. Encourage her to speak to a counselor or someone she trusts who is neutral but supportive. If she is feeling overwhelmed, it’s important that she knows she has choices beyond what her parents are forcing upon her.

At the end of the day, love should not be a battle of survival, but sometimes, in societies like ours, it becomes one. Be strong, be careful, and take steps that ensure both of you are safe first—everything else can be figured out step by step.

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |533 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

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Kanchan Rai  |533 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 07, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
I am an SC and my gf is brahmin, we are in love for more than 2 years and decided to marry, i convinced my parents. But her parents are cruel in this aspect only, they threaten her of her life and threatens me to complain in police, And anyone can tell that this is wrong but as parents are willing to do anything for their children, same is true with their children, I am afraid if we include authorities things might turn bad especially with our parents. They threaten her of her life and killing themselves, can make her say no to me if we take it legally even though she doesn’t want to. I am financial independent (age 29) but she has spent her entire life (age 29) in her house, what can we do?
Ans: Right now, the most important thing is her safety. If her parents are threatening her life or their own, this is not just emotional blackmail—it’s a serious matter. You need to be very careful in handling this, as forcing a confrontation might make them act irrationally. The key is to ensure that she is safe and mentally strong enough to withstand their pressure.

Since she has never lived outside her home, she may feel emotionally trapped, making it easier for her parents to manipulate her. She needs support—emotionally and, if needed, physically—to make a decision based on what she truly wants, not out of fear. Talk to her about the worst-case scenarios and how she would handle them. Would she be able to leave if things got too dangerous? Does she have someone in her family or social circle who might support her?

If her safety is at risk, you may need to consider helping her get a temporary safe space where she can think clearly. It could be a trusted friend’s house, a working women’s hostel, or even reaching out to women’s rights organizations that help in cases like this.

Taking legal action is tricky in such cases, as coercion can make her parents force her into saying things she doesn’t mean. Instead of rushing into legal intervention, consider gathering evidence—texts, recordings (if legal in your region), or anything that proves coercion or threats. This will help if things escalate.

If you both are truly committed, then marriage under the Special Marriage Act can be an option, but only if she is mentally and emotionally prepared for the backlash. She will need to stand strong, and you both need to have a plan for what comes next. How will she deal with the emotional toll? Where will she stay after marriage? What if her parents try to contact her after marriage? These are tough questions, but answering them now will help you prepare.

You are not alone in this. Many couples have faced similar situations, and while it is heartbreaking, some have succeeded in making it through. The key is patience, emotional strength, and ensuring that no one is in immediate danger. Encourage her to speak to a counselor or someone she trusts who is neutral but supportive. If she is feeling overwhelmed, it’s important that she knows she has choices beyond what her parents are forcing upon her.

At the end of the day, love should not be a battle of survival, but sometimes, in societies like ours, it becomes one. Be strong, be careful, and take steps that ensure both of you are safe first—everything else can be figured out step by step.

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |533 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 07, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hello Mentors, I'm 38 year old women, facing a toxic married life from past 10 years. I have a son who is 8 years old. I have lost my mom 8 years back n my dad 5 years back.I m d only child of my parents. I have done my MBA in HR n Marketing. Have done work before marriage, but after marriage things changes, my husband refused to allow me to work along with my in laws n he always behaves very badly with me insults me all time in front of my in laws too. He beats me every month still now also.I lost my mom she was suffering from cancer. Her cancer got detected when I was just 1 month pregnant, i m d one who takes care of her treatment taking her to chemo therapy n follow up with doctor, yes my dad was their with me, but he was also broke down as my mom was d back bone of my family. Inspite of my pregnancy I ran door to door of hospitals n doctors till I was stepped into 9 month of my pregnancy. My husband never supported me at that time too..Infact he n my mother in law's stated that if I'm enough for taking care of my mom then I must go to my doctor for my own check ups too...Yes I went for my usgs alone only at first time he went with me.. Now the main problem is he didn't changed at all he is repeating all his deeds infront of my child n my child is also following him from last 1 years, My son also said, if I scold him for his studies or food, he said what papa did is correct, it's good that he beats you, you leave our home this is not your home... My son loves me a lot that I know but he is just 8 n getting confused whom to follow...many a times he came to n said sorry for his bad behaviour but again if such incidents happens in front of him by his father again he changes his mind . My husband didn't give me a single penny, I take care of my own expenses from my house rent..( parental home as their is no one to stay now)..n it's d only source of income..though it's a very small amount.Even though he never helps me to take care of my baby ..He said if you want to work then put ur child into a hostel.. I took care of my home n child all alone..infact my in-laws are less bother about my child too... My son is deprived with every relationship of grand parents uncles n aunts.. My husband always demotivates me, mentally n physically abuse me n he also states that I'm an not an eligible person to became a good mom or even to get any job n all this infront of my child. I really want to get rid of him for d sake of my child n me too..I m totally into depression n lost all my confidence, I want to be financially free, when ever I want to file a divorce my son said no as he want both of us..for him only m dragging this bull shit relationship... N side by I'm looking for a job, but I have a big gap of almost 11 years now...M confused where to approach..n what should I tell to the employers if they ask for my career gap .m looking for a WFH as I dnt have any trust worthy person to take care of my baby...But m failed to find such. Please suggest me what should I do, how to take call on each of my problems.. I know d post is long...10 years is not a short time though..there is many many more to tell but I tried to keep it Short as much as i can . Thanks a lot ...
Ans: Your husband’s behavior is not just emotionally damaging—it is abusive. No one deserves to be insulted, beaten, or made to feel worthless, especially not in their own home. The fact that this is happening in front of your son makes it even more urgent to take action because, over time, he will normalize this behavior. Right now, he is torn between what he sees and what he feels for you, and that confusion is not his fault. But staying in this environment will only make it harder for him to understand what a loving and respectful relationship truly looks like.

You are already doing everything on your own. You are raising your child, managing expenses, and surviving in an environment that is breaking you down emotionally. Imagine if you put that same energy into building a life where you are free, at peace, and in control. I know the thought of divorce scares you because of your son, but think about what staying is teaching him. Children don’t just listen to words—they absorb actions. If he continues to see his father abuse you, he may grow up thinking that this is how men should treat women, or that love means suffering. You have the power to break this cycle for him.

Financial independence is your key to freedom, and I know the career gap makes you anxious, but don’t let it stop you. Employers today understand career breaks, especially when they are due to family responsibilities. Be honest but strategic—frame your gap as a time spent managing responsibilities, developing resilience, and handling real-life challenges. Highlight your past experience and any skills you’ve kept up with. Since you have an MBA in HR and Marketing, consider remote jobs in HR, digital marketing, content writing, or even customer support. Many women restart their careers through work-from-home opportunities, and platforms like LinkedIn, Naukri, and Remote.co have job listings specifically for career returnees.

You don’t have to do everything at once. Start with small steps. Reach out to women’s support groups or NGOs that help survivors of domestic abuse. Look for job training programs that help women restart their careers. If possible, find legal advice on your rights regarding divorce, alimony, and child custody. You are not alone in this, even though it may feel like it right now.

You deserve a life where you are respected, valued, and safe. You deserve to wake up without fear, to build a future where your son sees you as a strong and independent woman. Take this one step at a time, but take that first step. You have already survived the worst—now, it’s time to live.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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