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Dr Aarti

Dr Aarti Bakshi  | Answer  |Ask -

Child and Parenting Counsellor - Answered on Jan 27, 2023

Dr Aarti Bakshi is a psychologist licensed by the Rehabilitation Council of India.
A school counsellor, she has worked for 15 years with young adults.
She has two PhD degrees -- developmental psychology from Global Institute of Healthcare Management and clinical psychology from Singhania University.
She is on the CBSE panel for counsellors and special educators. She collaborates with SAAR Education to help children develop life skills.
She has authored SEL (social emotional learning) journals for Grades 1-8.... more
Anonymous Question by Anonymous on Jan 26, 2023Hindi
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Dr Bakshi how can I limit my child's screen time in a positive way? My son gets very annoyed when I switch off the tv or limit his screen time. How do I deal with his tantrums and aggressive behaviour?

Ans: Dear Divya, Hope and fear in my opinion are the strongest emotions. And we learn parenting on the job. Secondly, mirroring is a well-worked upon strategy. Technology, including screen time gives us 'dopamine' and increases our senses uses. On the contrary, a normal paced life seems no fun and 'monotonous'. Every child wishes to push boundaries and present their self-identity. This leads to arguments and tempers soaring on both sides, a parents and also from the child. Strategies that help: 1. Put down your device and talk of your day to the family. 2. Listening, and agreeing, discussions as a family while eating meals is a great connect. 3. Having no-tech zones as bedrooms and dinning tables is another. 4. Lastly, give the child half an hour during a weekday and an extra 1 hour during weekends helps. It's 'what should I do' 'I am bored' reasons that demand the 'dopamine fix. And Divya, inviting children of the same age who all play together with your child works. Family game nights, dancing together and bed time stories work too. Do revert, on what worked.
DISCLAIMER: The answer provided by rediffGURUS is for informational and general awareness purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical diagnosis or treatment.
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Me married from last 5years. But from last 10months me and my wife having disputes. Any reason
Ans: One possibility is communication breakdown. Over time, couples may fall into patterns where they no longer communicate as openly or effectively as they once did. Misunderstandings, unmet expectations, or unspoken feelings can lead to tension and disputes. It’s important to reflect on whether you both are expressing your thoughts and emotions clearly and listening to each other with empathy.

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Im married from last 3 months and we are from very conservative family. My wife and i never met before marriage and after marriage i asked her she had relationship before marriage but she denied. But after 3 months i received a call from her ex that she had relationship with him he had physical relationship with her atleast for 5 years straight and she had 2 bf before him too what should i do now with this information?
Ans: allow yourself to process your feelings. It's normal to feel a range of emotions—shock, hurt, confusion, or even betrayal. Give yourself the space to sit with these emotions without rushing to any immediate decisions or confrontations.

Consider the source of this information. An ex-partner might have motives that are not aligned with the best interests of your marriage. It's crucial to evaluate the credibility of the information and not act solely on a third-party account.

Open, honest communication with your wife is key. Instead of approaching the conversation with accusations, try to express your feelings and concerns calmly. Let her share her perspective and feelings. This conversation is not just about the past, but about building trust and understanding in your relationship moving forward.

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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