Home > User

Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help


Anu Krishna1044 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 12, 2023

Asked on - Apr 05, 2023Hindi

Hello Anu - we have a 5 year old son and he's getting out of our control these days and we don't know how to handle him. His actions and tantrums are mischievous and hurtful at the same time. Earlier he used to get scared from his mother but she's also losing control over him these days. If we scream or shout, he repeats the same things that kind of irritates us more. If we try to be reasonable with him, it's of no use - he takes us for granted. If we tell him about repercussions on his actions like a timeout or no tv time or no play time, he does not listen and at the end we give him to his crying. He also becomes uncontrollably violent at times - though he thinks it's a game, but in reality his actions literally hurt us. I know partially I am to blame as when he was younger, these violent games looked fun but now that he's older and stronger, they are not fun anymore to me or anyone in our house. I've tried to explain him, but at the end he is just 5 years old! Every morning to night it's a mountaineous challenge for us. My wife and I talk after he sleeps, decide what to do or not do from the next dat but bam! it's just the same routine every single day. Moreover my wife is pregnant with our second child so I fear this might have a bad effect on our 2nd baby as my wife remains stressed out. I know this could be every parent - but then if it happens that often, is there a solution? Can you help us?
Ans: Dear Shubham,
How is it possible for a 5-year old to understand logic when he is throwing an emotional fit (tantrum)?
Like you said it yourself; when it could have been stopped and changed, it wasn't done. He probably felt that it was fine to behave 'violently' (though I don't understand the context in which you use this word).
Now. all of a sudden when you and your wife are trying to stop him, he is pulling away as this behaviour was rewarded earlier. he has your earlier silence as your love and affection for which which he fears will be withdrawn now if he stops his behaviour.
So, logic isn't going to work; it doesn't work with adults, and here the child is merely 5 years.
So undoing what was done is going to take a lot of effort and patience (beyond all the talk that you and yoir wife are doing).
Start by:
- ignoring his tantrums; he will time-out himself in exhaustion
- talking to him at his eye level; get down on your knees, so he doesn't feel intimidated by your height
- hugging him a lot; a caring touch is worth a thousand words
- telling him how excited you both were when he was born; this can ensure that he will be special even after the arrival of the new baby
- distracting him with creative things; story telling and fine motor skill games improve focus and concentration
- cutting down on foods filled with sugar; sugar boost is artificial and can make a child or anyone go a little anxious
- ensuring him that he is loved a lot; saying it aloud while hugging him will soften his behaviour over time

Try these and I hope they work. If not, kindly without delay seek an appointment with a professional who can deal with children at your son's age.

All the best!

Harsh Bharwani56 Answers  |Ask -

Entrepreneurship Expert - Answered on Mar 27, 2023

Asked on - Mar 27, 2023Hindi

Hello Harsh - I am 35 years old, senior business analyst and currently freelancing for the past 3 years (Upwork). In the past I have worked with Accenture and Deloitte. It's being good so far - I get to work with multiple clients, facing real time challenges. Biggest thing is the pay is good, I earned upto 50L last year. I could have never achieved this pay grade working with an MNC at the same position. However, the question I always ask myself is, is this sustainable? What if I suddenly stop receiving clients or what if recession strikes? I always have a sense of insecurity. The second part to the question is - what shall I pursue from here on to make sure I nullify this insecurity. I don't want to go back to the corporate job as I hate the whole setup. Please guide.
Ans: It's great to hear that you are enjoying freelancing and have been successful in earning a good income from it. However, it is natural to have concerns about the sustainability of your business and the potential impact of a recession. Here are some suggestions for addressing these concerns and planning for the future:

Diversify your client base: If you rely heavily on one or two clients for your income, it may be worth diversifying your client base to reduce your dependence on any single client. You can try reaching out to new clients, building your personal brand, and expanding your services to attract more business.

Build a network: Networking can be a powerful tool for freelancers. Attend industry events, join online communities, and connect with other freelancers in your field. These connections can provide you with potential clients, referrals, and valuable insights into industry trends.

Maintain a healthy financial buffer: It's always a good idea to have a financial buffer in case of unexpected events. Try to save some of your income each month and create an emergency fund that can cover at least six months of your living expenses.

Invest in your skills: As a business analyst, it's important to stay up-to-date with the latest tools, techniques, and trends in your field. Consider investing in training, courses, or certifications to enhance your skills and stay relevant.

Explore passive income streams: Consider exploring passive income streams such as creating an online course or writing a book. This can provide an additional source of income and help you diversify your business.

Remember, freelancing can be a great option, but it also requires a significant amount of self-motivation, discipline, and planning. By taking steps to diversify your client base, build a network, maintain financial stability, invest in your skills, and explore passive income streams, you can minimize the risk of insecurity and build a sustainable freelance business.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.


You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds