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Dr Aarti Bakshi |40 Answers |Ask -Follow

Child and Parenting Counsellor - Answered on Apr 27, 2023

Dr Aarti Bakshi is a psychologist licensed by the Rehabilitation Council of India.
A school counsellor, she has worked for 15 years with young adults.
She has two PhD degrees -- developmental psychology from Global Institute of Healthcare Management and clinical psychology from Singhania University.
She is on the CBSE panel for counsellors and special educators. She collaborates with SAAR Education to help children develop life skills.
She has authored SEL (social emotional learning) journals for Grades 1-8.... more

Question by VIVEK on Apr 18, 2023Hindi

Health

MY 4 YEARS CHILD (MALE) ALWAYS HITTING PEOPLE.HOW TO CONTROL HIM?

Ans: Smile, a gentle pressure on his upper arm, no nails digging, and sit down with your child. Get to eye level, and say a ‘ no’. Again smile and say a no. Consistency matters, do get back with feedback.

DISCLAIMER: The answer provided by rediffGURUS is for informational and general awareness purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical diagnosis or treatment.

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My son is not well since last 15 months approximately and he skipped school very often. Now he gets aggression very soon. Pls provide suitable advice.

Ans: He needs to be checked by a doctor for any deficiency. Blood tests too may be needed

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Question by SANJEEV - Mar 21, 2023Hindi

HI ANU, MYSELF SANJEEV AND 45YRS OLD AND I HAD A CHILD OF 14YRS OLD BUT HE IS VERY MUCH AGRESSIVE NATURE WID ME AND NEVER LISTEN TO ME WHAT I SAID FOR HIS BETTERMENT, CAN YOU SUGGEST ME HOW TACKLE HIM

Ans: Dear Sanjeev,
I will be surprised if your 14-year old didn't give you a challenging time.
Embrace this phase as a part of stepping into the peak adolescent phase where he is striving to establish his independent identity before stepping into adulthood.
You will see him talk back rudely, ignore you, challenge your advice, give you the silent treatment and more...

The best ways to tackle him is:
Be a friendly parent and not a friend to him.
Ask questions more than instruct him.
Listen to him patiently without any interruptions so that he feels heard.
Don't threaten to withdraw his allowance or change the wi-fi password; this will only make him rebel more.
Tackle his screams/rude talks or rebellious streaks with a gentle smile at the end which will leave him guessing.

A magic statement that always breaks the ice in any relationship is: 'What will make you feel better?'
At the end of the day, don't worry. He has been raised with the values of your home; he will turn around...but do keep an eye as this is the age of digital media and the temptations are heavy and more. So, if you see something that is fishy or dangerous, seek an appointment with an expert who can guide him appropriately.

All the best!

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Child and Parenting Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2023

Question by nihit - Jul 22, 2023Hindi

Health

MY 8 yr old kid has anger issues. He is not able to accept any rejections. He wants whatever he asks for. If we say no to anything he gets hyper and start beating and shouting. When angry he doesn't listen to both of us( mom and dad). Please suggest.

Ans: Dear Parents,
Anger is an emotion which caters to fear and loss of control. Give a choice and not a command to let your son know that he has a choice.
Example- your son says “ I do not want to do homework”, you could say, “ would you like to do half now and half after play time” 2. Modelling helps- accept his emotion but essential agreements are needed for accepted behaviour. Showing as parents what you do to handle any strong emotions is needed. Talking to each other as partners in appropriate tones is also needed. Have family dinners where you discuss things each of you are grateful for and how you as grown ups handle tough situations.

Aruna Agarwal | Answer |Ask -Follow

Child and Parenting Counsellor - Answered on Feb 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 17, 2023Hindi

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My son(3rd grade) good at most of the things studies, sports etc.. but little agressive so beats and fights at school. He tells they do something to me so I do. I do not want to suppress him by beating or scaring him. What could be the best way I can handle him. Currently I am talking to him by telling consequences of doing such things...

Ans: Check if he is able to accept No and have waiting skills. Incase not, you can first work on it. Give him but delay it and give him what he wants immediately. If he is not able to adjust to a group it can be due to various reasons,we need to check that.

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I have joined KEA SECOND ROND at St Johns BGR. Weather I am eligible to participate in AIQ third round also how much penalty I should pay at KEA

Ans: Search thoroughly in net, you will certainly find your answer. Best of luck. Professor.........................:)

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Asked by Anonymous - Jan 18, 2025Hindi

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Hello, I'm about to finish my third year in b.a. in economics, I want to earn money with a settled job for my parents. I'm confused rn, I want to prepare for SSC CGL, and earn good, but I fear of taking a gap after my graduation, since my college is very strict towards attendance and load is too much thus I don't want to go there again for my pg, idk if I should do private MBA or ma in economics or any other diploma in computer related or finance related course while simultaneously doing my preparation since I don't want to do nothing while sitting at home.(Btw I'm from Agra and it's getting hard for me to find good college where I can do my Master's in economics non-regular mode in reasonable fee)

Ans: Search thoroughly in net with more time, you will certainly find your solution. Best of luck. Professor.........................:)

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Asked by Anonymous - Dec 22, 2024Hindi

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hello, I have done my MBBS from Bangladesh in 2023 and have completed my internship also in Bangladesh in 2024. Now I want to pursue for my job in UK for which I have to give plab exam so I want step-by-step guidance how I can apply for that and where are the step 1 and step 2 exam going to be conducted.What are the Requirements for the exam ?

Ans: Please communicate with the appropriate authority who conducts the examination for giving you the opportunity to do job in UK. Best of luck. Professor..................:)

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Asked by Anonymous - Jan 30, 2025Hindi

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I am a 45 year old man. My problem is that I can't look people in the eye and talk. My strict upbringing may have made me an unnecessarily polite and timid person. I cannot exercise my authority at work when necessary. How do I get out of this personality?

Ans: it is great you know you need to work on yourself - join public speaking sessions, work on your confidence , know that saying a no is not being rude - this will require you to do a lot of reflection and talking to yourself - all the best.

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 30, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 05, 2024Hindi

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Hi Sir, My Son is studying in 11th std with PCMCs and preparing both for NATA and CET. He was an average student in tenth scoring 55%, we are hoping for better performance in his 12th board. Currently we are staying in Bangalore. We need your suggestion in choosing between BArch or BE (Civil/Mech/Electrical). Which one will be better for him in difficulty level, fee structure, future job prospects and if he wants to Masters, whether he can continue in India or abroad. If abroad which countries or university are good for him for masters. Thank you

Ans: In B.Arch difficulty level is less but he must be good in drawing. A candidate who is bad in drawing can't be an Architect, even if he becomes he will fail in professional life. BE (Civil/Mech/Electrical) needs good knowledge of Maths and Physics. From his 10th score it seems to be he is an below average student. Fee structure is mostly same in both. For Masters we can think afterwards, no question of long term planning. In abroad always USA is the best for Engineering. Best of luck. Regards. Professor....................................................:)

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 30, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 06, 2024Hindi

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Hi , I am planning to pursue a master's degree from Australia in 2025 Feb intake and got my education loan sanctioned from a bank too, but the university requires some interview process for confirming my admission and the interview is done now and it's been more than 1 month I didn't got any reply from the University of whether my admission is confirmed or not , because of the new law of student capping in Australia they are putting it on hold and now I have a offer letter from other university too but the thing is my sanction letter is already used for my first uni and I want to ask is there any way that I can use the same sanction letter for other university too or any other alternative for this that what should I do in this situation

Ans: You contact the admission cell of the second university and explain everything very honestly. Tell them the same story what you narrated here. I think they will consider your case with sincerity. Best of luck. Professor.......................................:)

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Dating Coach - Answered on Jan 30, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 30, 2025Hindi

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What to say if my boyfriend asks who is more important to you , me or your friends? When I say everyone has some importance in life, he gets offended. What should I say

Ans: Ask him the reason or asking this question, what is his motive to ask this question. Your response to him is as it should be, but learn why did he ask you the question.

It is ok to ask questions, doing this will help you give apt responses. It also shows your investment in a discussion as this.

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Asked by Anonymous - Nov 08, 2024Hindi

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I am having 10 years of experience and due to my health I had to left my job in between and without any offer in hand. Now, Despite applied indefinitely I am not getting much response. I have started my own website and working on the same providing some insights on it. As I am market research professional. So, What should I do to tackle this situation and let me tell you I have done Bcom(H) & MBA. How to approach in a new way for interview or how should I upskill despite taking change needs of job due to AI.

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Question by Unnikrishnan - Jan 30, 2025Hindi

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Dear Sir My son is studying EEE , and taken electrical major. He would like pursue his career in LEED or QAQC can you please advise what extra courses he need to undertake

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Asked by Anonymous - Jan 29, 2025Hindi

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Im afarid to express my love to a women. She is very good looking and much more than that she had a good character. But the main problem arises is she is 171cm and I'm 165cm. I'm afraid may be I will get rejected. I love her so much. Should i I leave her and move on. And one thing also i don't even talk to her, I'm afraid to talk. Can you give some tips to talking also

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand your concern but how will you know whether height is an issue for her until you go ahead and speak to her? If you are worried about confessing your feelings for her directly, it's best you take things slow. Anyways, people are more likely to take such confessions on a positive note if they know the person.

You can start with a Hi, followed by letting her know that you have seen her around quite a few times. You can ask her what she does, and other general questions. Don't do it all in a single day; try building rapport slowly. This way you won't be putting too much pressure on yourself or on her.

Best Wishes.

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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