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विशेषज्ञ की सलाह चाहिए?हमारे गुरु मदद कर सकते हैं
Anu

Anu Krishna  |1622 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 16, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Sep 13, 2024
Relationship

Hi Anu ji, I am married since 2002 and have a single son who is 21 years. I like and love another lady who is also married and has 2 sons. We both are not happy in our respective married life. We also both love each other and have gone far ahead in our relationship n want to get married. My wife has caught me several times but i cant forget my girlfriend. what should i do

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Be honest with your wife and tell her exactly how you feel. There is no point playing around with two women and hurting both of them. Make a choice and stick to it...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

आप नीचे ऐसेही प्रश्न और उत्तर देखना पसंद कर सकते हैं

Love Guru

Love Guru   | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Feb 27, 2023

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Relationship
मेरी उम्र 36 साल है. मेरी शादी को पिछले 5 साल हो गए हैं और हमारा एक 4 साल का लड़का भी है। हालाँकि कॉलेज के दिनों में वह मेरी गर्ल फ्रेंड थी, लेकिन कॉलेज के बाद हमारा ब्रेकअप हो गया क्योंकि हमारे बीच कई मतभेद थे। तभी मेरी मुलाकात एक लड़की से हुई जो मुझसे बहुत प्यार करती थी। इस दौरान उसका भी कुछ रिश्ता था लेकिन मैंने कभी इस बारे में पूछा या जानने की कोशिश नहीं की. लेकिन आखिरकार फिल्म जैसी स्थिति में मैंने अपनी पिछली प्रेमिका से शादी कर ली, क्योंकि हमारे परिवारों ने हमारी शादी तय कर दी थी। दिन-ब-दिन हमारे मतभेद बढ़ते जा रहे हैं और हमारे मन में एक-दूसरे के लिए कोई प्यार या सम्मान नहीं है और सिर्फ बच्चे के लिए मैं अपना रिश्ता जारी रख रही हूं। मुझे बीच-बीच में दूसरी लड़की की भी बहुत याद आती है। मेरी शादी के बाद से मैं उसके संपर्क में नहीं हूं।' लेकिन उसे भूल पाना मेरे लिए संभव नहीं है. मुझे क्या करना चाहिए ? कृपया सुझाव दें
Ans: किसी विवाह चिकित्सक के पास जाएँ; आपको जोड़ों की जरूरत है’ निश्चित रूप से परामर्श. हो सकता है कि शादी एक गलती रही हो, लेकिन अब आपका एक बच्चा है और आप पर अपने बेटे का दायित्व है कि कम से कम कोशिश करे और चीजों को सुव्यवस्थित करे। अंतत: यदि कोई पूरी तरह से टूट जाता है तो आपके पास कोई विकल्प नहीं बचता है, लेकिन पहले चीजों को बचाने का प्रयास करें। और इसके लिए आपको अपने पूर्व के बारे में सभी धारणाओं को अलग रखना होगा। कम से कम वर्तमान के लिए.

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Love Guru

Love Guru   | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 17, 2023English
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Relationship
मैं 52 साल का शादीशुदा आदमी हूँ, अच्छे शरीर वाला हूँ और एक उच्च समूह कार्यकारी के रूप में कार्यरत हूँ। पिछले कुछ महीनों से मैं एक विवाहित महिला के साथ रिश्ते में हूं जो मेरे साथ काम करती है और मेरे ठीक बगल में काम करने वाली महिला शादीशुदा है और 40 साल की है। अपनी शादीशुदा जिंदगी में हालांकि मैं अपनी पत्नी से प्यार करता हूं, लेकिन वह मुझसे दूरी बनाए रखती है और हमारे रिश्ते बिल्कुल भी अच्छे नहीं हैं। इसके अलावा हम अलग घर में रह रहे हैं। मेरा 18 साल का एक बेटा है. मेरी विवाहेतर साथी भी अपने पारिवारिक जीवन से खुश नहीं है। लेकिन वह बहुत देखभाल करने वाली है और उसने मेरे प्रति अपना सम्मान और स्नेह व्यक्त किया। मुझे भी उसकी परवाह है और मैंने उससे अपनी भावनाएं व्यक्त कीं।' हम एक-दूसरे का बहुत सम्मान करते हैं और जब हम साथ होते हैं तो हमें अच्छा लगता है। हमारा रिश्ता पूरी तरह से आपसी सम्मान और देखभाल का है। कभी-कभार स्नेह से गले मिलने के अलावा एक-दूसरे के प्रति कोई शारीरिक आकर्षण नहीं। मैं हमारे रिश्ते का भविष्य नहीं जानता। मुझे क्या करना चाहिए। मैंने बस आगे बढ़ने की कोशिश की लेकिन ऐसा करने में असमर्थ रहा। उसने भी वैसा ही प्रयास किया जैसा उसने मुझसे कहा था, लेकिन जब भी हम मिलते थे तो हम एक-दूसरे के बारे में बार-बार सोचने से खुद को रोक नहीं पाते थे। कृपया सलाह दें।
Ans: आपका कोई भावनात्मक मामला है, शारीरिक नहीं। आपके पास एक विकल्प है — आप कहते हैं कि आप अपनी पत्नी से प्यार करते हैं, तो एक विकल्प यह है कि आप अपनी शादी को बचाने का प्रयास करें। दूसरा है उस अध्याय को बंद करना और अपने विवाहेतर साथी के साथ आगे बढ़ना - लेकिन क्या वह भी ऐसा करने को तैयार है? आने वाले वर्षों तक अधर में लटके रहने का कोई मतलब नहीं है। अपने भविष्य के बारे में निर्णय लें और आगे बढ़ें।

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1622 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 23, 2024English
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Relationship
नमस्ते अनु! मेरी उम्र 46 साल है। मैं शादीशुदा हूँ और मेरी दो बेटियाँ हैं। मुझे 8 साल पहले मुझसे 3-4 साल छोटी एक महिला से प्यार हो गया था। वह अपनी शादी से खुश नहीं थी और उसने तलाक ले लिया क्योंकि मैंने उसे उसके दुख से उबरने में मदद की थी। हम दोनों के बीच बहुत अच्छा रिश्ता था। अब वह मुझसे मेरी पत्नी को तलाक देने और उससे शादी करने के लिए कह रही है। मैं अपनी पत्नी और उससे बहुत प्यार करता हूँ, क्योंकि वह भी मुझसे बहुत प्यार करती है और मैं भी। अब क्या करूँ क्योंकि मेरी पत्नी उसे स्वीकार नहीं करना चाहती और न ही वह मेरी पत्नी को स्वीकार करना चाहती है।
Ans: प्रिय अनाम,
कोई भी पुरुष आपकी जगह पर नहीं रहना चाहेगा; गंभीरता से!
अब, आप इस झंझट में कैसे फंस गए, यह कोई भी अनुमान लगा सकता है...लेकिन अपने परिवार की खातिर (आपके लिए सब कुछ ठीक चल रहा है), ऐसा निर्णय लें जो सभी के लिए सबसे अच्छा हो; कम से कम लंबे समय में। (मेरे लिए आपके लिए निर्णय लेना नैतिक रूप से सही नहीं है)।

यह दोनों महिलाओं के लिए अनुचित हो सकता है और आपको इसके परिणाम भुगतने होंगे...
अब, मैं आपको या आपने जो किया है, उसके बारे में नहीं आंक रहा हूँ, लेकिन आप स्पष्ट रूप से जानते थे कि दूसरी महिला से प्यार करना एक विकल्प था...साथ ही, अब वह आपसे जो अपेक्षा रखती है, वह आपके लिए असहज है।
क्या उसे आपसे कभी यह संदेश मिला कि अगर वह अपने पति को तलाक देती है, तो आप भी अपनी पत्नी को तलाक देंगे और उसके साथ मिल जाएंगे?
प्यार से ज़्यादा, यह मांगों के साथ ज़रूरत बन गया है...

निर्णय लें, उस पर टिके रहें और दोनों में से किसी एक को इससे उबरने में मदद करें! आप उन दोनों के लिए इसके लिए ऋणी हैं!

शुभकामनाएँ!
अनु कृष्णा
माइंड कोच|एनएलपी ट्रेनर|लेखक
ड्रॉप इन: www.unfear.io
मुझसे संपर्क करें: फेसबुक: anukrish07/ और लिंक्डइन: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Dr Upneet

Dr Upneet Kaur  |44 Answers  |Ask -

Marriage counsellor - Answered on Feb 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 15, 2025
Relationship
I am 46 years old male married for the fast 17 years. I have one son. My wife loves me very much. She is highly posessive about me since our marriage. I fell in love with my collegue who is a widower and 25 years of age with a daughter. She only started communicating and talking to me a lot. I was not having any kind of feelings towards her as I was overloaded with work. I got transferred to other place. There work pressure is not there. Now, I am in love with that widower. I told this to my wife also. She was shocked. After hue and cry, now my wife is back to normal and warned me to stay away from that girl.But I am not able to forget that girl. I called her over phone four to five times for a couple of times. It seems, now that girl is not interested in me. When I was with her, I never confessed that I love her. Now when I got transferred, i am keeping whats app messages which are visible only to her. I dont know whether she is not understanding this one, she is not responding. I dont want to cheat my wife and at the same time not able to forget that girl also. Please suggest me what to do.
Ans: Hello sir,
This is actually mid life crisis that you are going through, because of which you think you are having feelings for your colleague. Now that you have been transferred to a new place wirh new surroundings, take this as an opportunity to build new healthy relationships around you. You should start giving more quality time to your wife. She has given you a second chance. You should take it well and forget about your past as your colleague has also moved on now. I hope this will help you with your problem.
Take care
Dr Upneet kaur
Relationship counselor
https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

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Love Guru

Love Guru   | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on May 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 23, 2025
Relationship
I am 46 years old male married for the past 17 years. I have one son. My wife loves me very much. She is highly possessive about me since our marriage. I fell in love with my colleague who is a widow and 25 years of age with a seven years daughter. She only started communicating and talking to me a lot. I was not having any kind of feelings towards her as I was overloaded with work. Then, I got transferred to other place. There work pressure is not much as in the earlier section. Now, I am in love with that widow. I told this to my wife also but not told about this to that widow. After hearing this my wife was shocked. After hue and cry, now my wife is back to normal and warned me to stay away from that girl. But I am not able to forget that girl. I called her over phone four to five times. When I was with her, I never confessed that I love her. Now when I got transferred, I am keeping whats app statuses which are visible only to her. When ever I put up sad and love break up messages only that time she will respond by keeping whatsapp status otherwise she will be neutral. Whenever, I called her she replied and we spoke casually. Now, she also knows that I am loving her but not responding. I have deleted her mobile number but I remember it. Daily after leaving the house and before reaching the house I delete the number. I dont want to cheat my wife and at the same time not able to forget that girl also. Please suggest me what to do.
Ans: Time heals all wounds. And in this case, you definitely should let it. The girl is half your age and not interested in you. Be practical and value what you have — a wonderful family and loving wife who continues to tolerate you even after you confessed falling for someone else! This is not love my dear, it’s just a midlife crisis — an infatuation, nothing more.

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नवीनतम प्रश्न
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8932 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 17, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 17, 2025
Money
I have 2 App loans 36000 and 140000 + 2 credit card outstanding 95000 and 187000 (Both principal amount). I have bounced my all 4 EMI's since last 3 months due to job loss and my salary is peanuts. How can I survive with house chorus and paying EMI's. Please help
Ans: It is painful and stressful. But please know this — you are not alone, and you can come out of this. Let’s take this step-by-step.

You are facing:

2 App loans: Rs. 36,000 + Rs. 1,40,000

2 Credit card dues: Rs. 95,000 + Rs. 1,87,000

3 months EMIs already bounced

Low or no income due to job loss

Home responsibilities ongoing

This is serious, but manageable with the right action.

First, Understand What Will Not Work
Please avoid:

Taking new loans to pay old loans

Using other credit cards to pay EMIs

Borrowing from illegal or unknown lenders

Ignoring lenders and collection calls

Hoping the problem will disappear on its own

These will make your problem worse.

Step 1: Protect Yourself from Legal Pressure
You have already defaulted. That may lead to:

Legal notices from credit card companies

Harassment from collection agents

Credit score falling below 600

So you need to act fast.

Call each of the lenders yourself. Do not wait for them to call you.

Tell them honestly:

You lost your job

You are facing cash crisis

You want to settle and not escape

Ask for temporary EMI pause (moratorium) or restructuring

Lenders prefer talking to honest borrowers.

You may get:

Waiver of late fees

Reduction in interest

EMI holiday for few months

Option to convert dues into longer EMIs

Write an email also to them. Keep written proof.

This shows you are serious.

Step 2: Focus on Survival, Not Full Repayment Now
You must survive this phase first. Do only the must-do expenses:

Food and kitchen

Electricity and gas

Child or parents’ basic needs

Rent or basic housing

Cut all others:

OTT, Swiggy, Zomato, shopping

Eating out, subscriptions

Cab rides, mobile upgrades

Any premium items

Every saved rupee will count now.

Make a list of all expenses, and cut it to bare minimum.

Your mental peace comes before EMI.

Step 3: List Your Dues in Priority Order
Here is a breakdown:

App Loan 1 – Rs. 36,000

App Loan 2 – Rs. 1,40,000

Credit Card 1 – Rs. 95,000

Credit Card 2 – Rs. 1,87,000

App loans and credit cards have very high interest. Usually 24–40% per year.

But credit cards will affect your CIBIL score more if unpaid.

So give this order of priority:

Try to settle credit card 1 (Rs. 95,000) first

Then negotiate with credit card 2 (Rs. 1.87L)

After that, settle App Loan 1

Then App Loan 2

Why this order?

Credit card interest is high

Card dues snowball fast

App loans may negotiate faster than banks

Step 4: Ask for One-Time Settlement (OTS)
Once you show that you have zero income, some banks may agree to:

Close your loan at reduced principal

Stop interest from increasing further

Give you 3–6 months to pay off in parts

Ask for a written One-Time Settlement (OTS) letter.

Do not pay without it.

Once you settle, your CIBIL score will take time to recover. But that’s okay. Life first. Score later.

Step 5: Find Any Cash You Can
Please think deeply about the following:

Can you sell a scooter, old phone, gadgets?

Can any relative or friend help temporarily?

Do you have gold you can pledge (not sell)?

Any unused subscriptions or refund available?

Can you do part-time work for Rs. 300–500/day?

Every Rs. 500 helps your mental health now.

Avoid taking loans again. Instead, look for non-loan help.

Step 6: Get a Job, Any Job for Now
Even if it is not in your field, take any income work:

Delivery partner

Data entry

Freelance teaching

Typing work

Shop help

Online task jobs

Voice process

Focus is not on salary. Focus is to:

Keep cash flow coming

Feel responsible again

Stop going deeper into debt

Update resume. Ask friends. Join job groups. Apply daily.

Even Rs. 15,000/month will bring confidence.

You are not alone. Many professionals have started over.

Step 7: Emotionally Stay Strong
You may feel:

Guilt

Shame

Panic

Anger

Frustration

It is normal.

Please:

Talk to family or trusted friend

Keep one hour daily for walks, exercise or prayer

Sleep properly

Eat simple food, but on time

Avoid alcohol or substance use

This phase will pass.

Stay focused.

Final Insights
You are not a failure. This is a temporary financial emergency.

With calm steps, you can rebuild. Slowly, but surely.

Do this immediately:

Contact all lenders and ask for restructuring

Stop all luxury or non-essential expenses

Prioritise credit cards

Consider OTS if needed

Start small income work

Protect your mental strength

Once your income starts again:

Restart savings, even small

Use Certified Financial Planner later to rebuild

Learn how to stay debt-free in future

Take one step at a time.

You will come out stronger.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |6466 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 17, 2025

Career
Sir igot 444 and AIQ is 131279 iam obc ncl (kerala) there is any possibilities for BDS in government college.
Ans: Nibla, A NEET score of 444 falls below the typical marks cutoff for OBC-NCL candidates seeking BDS in government dental colleges, where qualifying marks range between 520–540 for OBC students. Similarly, All India BDS closing ranks under the 15 percent AIQ for OBC rarely exceed 35,000, whereas your AIQ rank is 131,279, placing you far outside the viable admission range. Nationwide only about 3,000 government BDS seats exist, and premier institutions such as SCB Dental College (Cuttack), Government Dental College (Bangalore), and Tamil Nadu Government Dental College (Chennai) closed with AIQ ranks under 30,000 for OBC. Under Kerala’s 85 percent state quota, Government Dental College, Thiruvananthapuram admitted OBC candidates with ranks up to 51,595 in earlier years, while Kottayam and Kannur closed within similar state-rank brackets, implying state ranks must be substantially lower than your AIQ conversion would yield. Consequently, securing a BDS seat in a government college appears highly unlikely. Consider prioritising private or deemed dental colleges with lower cutoffs and participating in both AIQ and state counselling to maximise admission options. Recommendation: Focus on private or deemed dental institutions, as government quota thresholds exceed reachable marks and ranks. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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