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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1604 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 26, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Sanjeev Question by Sanjeev on Aug 25, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

I love my sister-in-law very much and want to build a relationship with her, but her husband has died just 2 years ago, how can I explain to her.

Ans: Dear Sanjeev,
You can't explain love to anyone...because they must feel it for themselves in their own way...
You may want a relationship with her, but does she want a relationship with you?
Have you given a thought that she might still have raw wounds from her husband passing on? She may still not have moved on or may have chosen to still hold on to it.

What you can do is be a friend to her and know how she feels about another relationship...if she is ready, she may talk to you about it provided she feels like sharing all this with you. If she dismisses it, stay clear. Remember, you already have a relationship label that you are under within the family structure. Do respect it and respect her place in the family!

This will also save you from any heartbreaks if you have been making plans and working towards it. Know your boundaries and also protect your mind space as you respect the family structure.

All the best!

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Kanchan

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 01, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 29, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Let it be an anonymous question Husband and my wife above 65 years had quarrels for various reasons including the fact that her brother's behaviour was quite irritating to .But for the wife he was her favorite one.Initially she too agreed this fact and found out a term a term in English about such behaviour of Brother to Sister's husband.The husband used to make such complaints to her.Finally after so many years of happy life she has hired a flat and staying alone.Initially she used to talk to him.But slowly she started telling if she hears his sound the whole day is gone.She has looked after his mother very well andin the same way he helped her parents.Her mother had a heart attack and escaped.His mother in law told publicly that only because of him she escaped.Even though such good incidents were there the present situation is suchthat theyare staying apart.She is not ready to come back.The husband had already put his best effortsto persuade by sending message,voice messages and personal appology for whatever happened.But she is not ready to come back even though his close relatives talked to her several times.But no use.What is to be done to bring back her and to have happy life.Kindly note that the husband is ready for anything to rebuild life.But she is very adamant that she will not come back.In fact both of them are short tempered .But sometimes her anger goes up like a helicopter.How to rebuild this relationship?How to handle the situation?.
Ans: Rebuilding a relationship when both parties are over 65 and facing significant issues requires patience, understanding, and often professional intervention. Here are some steps that might help in your situation:

First, it's important to acknowledge the depth of the emotional wounds that have been inflicted. Both of you have shared many years together and have supported each other's families, indicating a strong bond that has been strained by recurring conflicts. Recognizing the positive history and expressing gratitude for the past contributions can help set a foundation for reconciliation.

Given that your wife has chosen to live separately and is currently very resistant to communication, it might be helpful to suggest professional counseling. A neutral third party, such as a therapist or marriage counselor, can facilitate conversations in a safe and structured environment. Counseling can help both of you understand the underlying issues, improve communication skills, and work through the anger and resentment that have built up over time.

It’s also crucial to give her space while making it clear that you are committed to working on the relationship. Respect her need for distance, but keep the lines of communication open by occasionally sending thoughtful messages that express your willingness to understand and address her concerns without pressuring her.

Reflect on your behavior and be genuinely open to change. Demonstrating your willingness to work on your own shortcomings can make a significant impact. This might include managing your temper, improving your listening skills, and showing empathy towards her feelings and perspectives.

Involving a close family member or a trusted friend who she respects might also be beneficial. They can act as intermediaries to convey your sincere intentions and help mediate the situation without taking sides.

Lastly, patience is key. Rebuilding trust and repairing a relationship, especially after long-standing issues, takes time. Continue to show her through your actions that you are committed to making positive changes and are willing to put in the effort needed to restore your relationship.

If you both can agree to engage in the process, even if it starts with small steps, there’s hope for reconciliation and rebuilding a happy life together.

..Read more

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Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 19, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 19, 2025
Money
I'm a fresher who currently got placed into an NBFC for 25k salary in hand. How can I multiply this through investments and savings. Please suggest me some. Thank you in advance
Ans: Absolutely delighted to hear that you’ve landed a job. Your first step is a big one. Starting at Rs. 25,000 in hand, you’re not just earning—you’re building a future. Let’s break this down into clear action steps. My aim is to guide you like a Certified Financial Planner would, with a 360-degree plan for savings and smart investments.

I’ll help you understand what to do with your income, how to manage your spending, and how to multiply your savings over time.

Let’s begin with the most important areas.

Understand Your Cash Flow
First, track where every rupee goes.

Use a simple notebook or a mobile app.

Classify expenses: needs, wants, and savings.

Always aim to save before you spend.

Try to save 30% of your income each month.

That means at least Rs. 7,500 should be saved.

Build Your Emergency Fund
Start a separate bank savings account.

Keep Rs. 15,000 to Rs. 30,000 for emergencies.

This is not for shopping or vacation.

Only use it for medical or job-related problems.

Add a fixed amount monthly until you reach your goal.

Get Health Insurance Immediately
Your employer may offer one, but it is not enough.

Buy a personal health cover worth Rs. 3 lakh to Rs. 5 lakh.

Premiums are low for your age.

It protects your savings during illness.

Always disclose everything honestly while applying.

Term Insurance is Not Urgent Yet
You are single and just starting.

So, no need for term insurance now.

Take it only when you have dependents.

Focus instead on building assets and savings.

Automate Your Savings Process
Open a separate savings bank account for investments.

Set auto-transfer every month after salary credit.

This creates financial discipline automatically.

Don’t mix this with your spending account.

Treat savings as your monthly bill.

Start SIPs in Actively Managed Mutual Funds
Choose regular plans via a Certified Financial Planner.

They guide you with experience and research.

Don’t go for direct funds without guidance.

Direct funds need time, study, and ongoing monitoring.

Regular plans give you ongoing personalised support.

A CFP and MFD can help with fund switching also.

Benefits of Actively Managed Mutual Funds
Fund managers take decisions after market study.

Better for new investors like you.

Helps avoid sudden losses due to inexperience.

Higher chances of outperformance in long term.

Active funds adapt to market changes quickly.

Stay Away From Index Funds
Index funds follow market, no fund manager involved.

In bad markets, they also fall badly.

No one to protect or shift to safer assets.

No flexibility in difficult times.

Active funds manage risk better than index funds.

Choose SIPs with Proper Goal-Setting
Don't invest just for returns.

Invest with a goal in mind.

Examples: buy laptop, travel, marriage, house fund.

Assign timelines for each goal.

Choose funds based on time horizon and risk level.

Ideal Portfolio Mix for You
Equity mutual funds: Long-term wealth creation.

Hybrid mutual funds: Balance between growth and safety.

Recurring deposit or FD: For short-term needs.

Keep 2 or 3 funds only. Not more.

Don’t invest in random funds from friends or apps.

Avoid These Investment Mistakes
Don’t buy insurance for investment.

Don’t invest in LIC endowment or ULIPs.

They give low return and high lock-in.

No flexibility, no transparency.

Avoid chit funds and schemes from unknown sources.

Regularly Review Your Progress
Every 6 months, check your investments.

See if your savings rate is increasing.

Track how much emergency fund you have built.

Check if goals are getting closer.

A CFP can help you monitor and correct your path.

Build Skills to Increase Income
Savings alone won’t create wealth fast.

Improve your career skills also.

Take affordable online courses.

Ask for projects at work, build a reputation.

Better pay will give you higher savings later.

Budgeting Tips That Actually Work
Follow 50-30-20 rule: 50% needs, 30% wants, 20% savings.

For now, you may need to reverse it: 50% savings.

Use UPI apps for expense control alerts.

Don’t keep too much cash in hand.

Withdraw once a week, not daily.

Social Media Influencers are Not Financial Planners
Don’t follow random advice online.

Their needs are not your needs.

Your plan should match your goals, not theirs.

Stick to your savings plan strictly.

Professional advice is always better.

Avoid Loan Traps at Early Stage
Don’t take EMI cards or credit cards yet.

Start with a debit card linked to your bank.

Avoid monthly subscriptions that you forget.

Keep zero debt as long as possible.

Loans reduce your ability to save and invest.

Benefits of Investing via MFD with CFP Support
You get advice suited to your income level.

Fund selection is personalised.

Help is given for SIP starting, changes, withdrawals.

They help with taxes and switching too.

Your long-term success becomes their priority.

Don’t Fall for High Returns Promises
If someone offers 20% return, it’s risky.

Stable 10–12% return over years is good.

Compound growth needs patience.

Shortcuts often lead to losses.

Stay steady and grow slowly but surely.

Think Long Term, Act Monthly
Rs. 2,000 monthly SIP grows big in few years.

You will learn patience through SIP investing.

Don’t stop SIPs if market falls.

Use market fall as chance to grow faster.

Keep SIPs running without panic.

Protect Yourself from Tax Shocks Later
Equity mutual funds give tax benefit on long term.

LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.

STCG is taxed at 20%.

For debt funds, all gains are taxed as per your slab.

So plan redemption properly.

Financial Independence Should Be Your Goal
Try to reach a stage where money works for you.

That needs slow and steady investing.

Once you reach Rs. 5 lakh corpus, add more SIPs.

With every hike, increase SIP by Rs. 500 to Rs. 1,000.

Build wealth step by step.

Stay Consistent, Not Perfect
You may skip saving in one month. That’s okay.

Don’t stop. Resume next month.

Track your progress, not your mistakes.

Stay focused on long term.

Small savings add up to big money later.

Finally
You have made a wonderful beginning.

Saving at Rs. 25,000 salary shows maturity.

With consistency, Rs. 7,500 monthly savings will create big wealth.

Stick to professionally managed mutual funds.

Don’t try shortcuts or risky bets.

Get support from a trusted Certified Financial Planner.

Learn, earn, save, invest, and grow at your own pace.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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