How to find love after a divorce? I am 45 and mother of two.

Ans:

I have a friend who's sailing in the same boat as you.

She's a newly single mom and was very worried during her divorce that she would never find love again. Her husband had already taken up with another woman before their paperwork was finalised.

So I'm going to give you the same advice I gave her -- stop looking.

She did and, a year later, she's in a new but happy relationship.

The guy she's with is someone she always knew as an acquaintance. Post her divorce, they became close and he is fond of the child as well.

There may be challenges ahead but the point is, as soon as she let life take over instead of this obsession to find someone else, a relationship came up unexpectedly and out of nowhere.

So breathe, recover from old wounds and let things happen as they must. Stop planning a second marriage right away. 

 

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

Online dating will be perfect for you. Most dating apps encourage people to take a second chance at love. And divorce is not the end. There are plenty of divorcees looking for real connections. And, let me assure you, "at this age" is not an issue in virtual dating. It comes without the burden of judgment. You can and should absolutely try dating apps to find genuine love. My advice would be to be clear about your divorce status; do not hide it. Second, when you set up your profile, mention your requirements and intentions in the bio. For instance, you want to find love. If you write it in your bio, only people who want the same will connect with you, helping both you and your match save time and effort on the wrong person. Third, even if you are rejected a few times in the beginning, don't give up. The right match can be right around the corner. Finally, find a dating app that caters to your need. For instance, some apps cater to users generally interested in long-term and serious relationships and then there are apps that focus more on casual relationships. Based on your preference, pick the right dating app to get better results.

Best Wishes!

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Once bitten, twice shy!
It happens and someday hopefully you move out of this 'hurt' phase into a 'trust' phase and when you cover that journey (it takes time and a lot of resolve to be able to want to trust again), you will be ready to get into another relationship.
So, decide for yourself when you want to make that journey and as you start, you will encounter insecurities and doubts...stick with it and it will all pass helping you reach a place of calm peace which will enable you to invite another person into your life.

All the best!