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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |628 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 03, 2023

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Feb 28, 2023Hindi
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Hello mam, I cannot focus on my work....I keep overthinking about the future and even after being skilled i cannot execute my work.I get distracted and agitated easily these days.I have lost confidence in myself i keep thinking how i would tackle things in future,I dont know what to do.Can you please guide.

Ans: Improving self-confidence and avoiding overthinking are two related but distinct issues. Here are some tips for both:

To improve self-confidence:

Identify your strengths and achievements. Write them down and revisit them when you feel insecure.Practice self-care, such as getting enough sleep, exercising, and eating healthy.Set realistic goals and work towards achieving them.Focus on your progress rather than comparing yourself to others.Surround yourself with positive and supportive people.Learn from your mistakes and failures rather than dwelling on them.Challenge negative self-talk and replace it with positive affirmations.Try new things and step out of your comfort zone.

To avoid overthinking:

Recognize when you're overthinking and acknowledge that it's not productive.Set aside time to think about the issue, but limit it to a specific amount of time.Engage in activities that distract you, such as exercise or hobbies.Practice mindfulness and focus on the present moment.Write down your thoughts and feelings to gain perspective and clarity.Talk to a trusted friend or therapist about your concerns.Accept that not everything can be controlled and focus on what you can control.Remind yourself that worrying won't solve the problem and take action towards a solution.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1679 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 01, 2024Hindi
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Hi mam. I kind of need mental fitness advice. I am 26 years old female. I am afraid a lot in taking up the decisions in my life due to overthinking. But it is not same when it comes to my work side. Always taking up the negative things from my surroundings and expressing the same. Sometimes i make negative situations in my mind and cry. Is there a way to change my mindset to overcome my overthinking as well as my negative mindset. Pls give me some tips to overcome laziness as well as procastination. Is there any yoga or medidation to cure this one. Because i really hate myself for this.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What exactly do you get by punishing yourself? It's another way to indulge in self-pity which will only keep you in the problem zone for longer.
Instead pay attention to the reasons towards laziness and procrastination.
Ask:
- Do I display laziness with every activity or a few or one specific one?
- If Yes, which is it?
- What about that activity/situation makes me want to procrastinate and not take action on it?
- If I actually make a plan and act on that activity/situation, how will things change for me?

This will give you an idea as to what exactly happens in the mind to avoid something and what you can do about it. We are never motivated to do anything if we don not get something concrete back in return. So, define the reward clearly...
And as far as negative things go, if you choose to focus on it, obviously it will grow bigger in the mind.

Keep the above questions list with you and check at regular intervals when faced with procrastination. Have a social circle of friends who can pull you up when you are down BUT they will not be kind all the time if you are going to indulge into self-pity. So, the decision to get better, to become more positive and actually do something big in life is a decision. Focus on how much your life will change for the better when you do this and it will be a clean and quick switchover.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1679 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 07, 2024

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Help me!!! 1.I'm starting new "work" on my own(challenging for me) but my mind says quit it, be quite & do nothing. I myself don't know that wether the result of work will be +ive or uncompleted like alws. 2. My mind has become like order seeker type, when someone orders me, I do those things with dedicated(but sad from inside) manner. But when myself will try something different(which i fear, but necessary) then. "I QUITS IT" & sometimes I don't even start. 3. I'm like stuck no clue what/whom I want to do in life, I'm in cllg(1 yr) doing (CSE) ,. 4. I want to do/try (sports,talking girls,study,stocks,coding..) many things, but myself, my thoughts(overthinker), R like just be in the place where u are[confused,po*n,think about past/future(being billio..re,olympics..), girl (that u liked & never talked), abusive/beating self,.. sometimes feels like end life, but don't hv courage for that also.. 5. I tried self help books, spirituality, god, self affirmation, writing... & thay affected me(sometimes) but for only some time, then again that devil me comes up &these things never get completed. As no one in my family knows about all these, so that's Y ,I hv to fight/loose/try again, the battles with myself.
Ans: Dear Harsh,
If in the past you have had the urge to QUIT, how is this time going to be different? This is not to discourage you from taking up 'new work' but pointing out that there is some amount of work that you need to put to clear the mind out of blockages.
-What is limiting you?
- What is the reason for putting off things?
- What comes first to the mind when you start something new?
Also, focus on one thing at a time; study and go deep into it...what's this thing with work? I don't understand. When the mind is unsettled, take one thing/activity, pursue it and finish it. It could simply be studying for Year 1 of your college...just only do that...once your mind is trained in completing an activity, you can add another one the next year along with studying and then pursue both...it could be some sport and studying...then the next year, you could add a third activity. This is called 'training the mind in discipline'. Discipline will make sure that you start and finish things...So, go slow and do one thing at a time.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1679 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 19, 2025

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The seconds of time during taking action..I get into the overthinking/over-analysing thoughts... 1. Imaginative: Where I becom's the character & live life(see images, speak..) in those..like being rich,powerfull,disciplined,wife,kids....things which I want/perceive from social media...+ memos of past also.. 2. Stuck: Where I becom's a "OBJECT" & voices + images of brain guides me to quit task's when doing things/challenging...by saying.. *What this thing(task/book..) gonna benefit you? *Don't do it, you will do worse/fail..people gonna judge/laugh to you...look yourself!!..no good face, no good dress, u don't hv courage/skill to do that thing. 3. Coping: "Quit it" & use Mobile(songs,reels,yt videos..) to stop/distract myself from those dark clouds. i) What/How [solution] to don't get stuck in those next time. ii) How to use that overthinking for my advantage.. with hving control. iii) I tried to fill the possible voids by dress/looks but things were same..so it's internal.. What to do for that?
Ans: Dear Work,
Overthinking and over processing never helped anyone. Focus on your self-talk and change that.
- Journaling
- Sports
- Art work
- Meditation
- Breathwork
These are a few ways in which you can attempt to slow down the mind from racing thoughts. Once that happens, work on your self-talk to make it more useful where you start to direct yourself towards what you want to do.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Hello sir, my son's rank in jee mains rank 25156 he got admission in electrical in silchar in josaa round, not in csab 1st round he got mechanical in kurushetra nit and he got admission in bits pillani rajeshthan for manufacturing engineering sir we are confused that whether we have to wait for 2nd and 3rd rounds in csab or he has good prospect in bits ,please guide us for good prospect for my son
Ans: Your son’s admission options include Electrical Engineering at NIT Silchar through JoSAA, Mechanical Engineering at NIT Kurukshetra via CSAB Round 1, and Manufacturing Engineering at BITS Pilani. NIT Silchar’s Electrical branch shows consistent placement rates around 80% with top recruiters like Amazon, offering average packages near Rs 12 LPA. NIT Kurukshetra’s Mechanical branch has an approximate 80% placement rate, with major industrial recruiters and average packages in the Rs 7.5-8.2 LPA range. BITS Pilani, known for its exceptional academic environment and strong industry connections, particularly excels in placements with nearly 90-100% of students placed, offering average packages in the range of Rs 18-20 LPA. Its manufacturing engineering branch benefits from this robust ecosystem despite lack of specific branch-wise data. Considering academic reputation, faculty quality, infrastructure, placement opportunities, and alumni network, BITS Pilani provides the most promising overall prospects. NIT Silchar and NIT Kurukshetra have good regional standing and opportunities but comparatively moderate placement outcomes.

The recommendation is to prioritize admission at BITS Pilani for Manufacturing Engineering due to superior placement outcomes, institutional prestige, and strong industry ties. If BITS is not preferred or feasible, NIT Silchar (Electrical) is a better option than NIT Kurukshetra (Mechanical). Waiting for further CSAB rounds is only advisable if aiming for significantly better branches or colleges aligned with your son’s rank. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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