How to Stop Overthinking and Take Action: A Reader's Experience

Ans: Improving self-confidence and avoiding overthinking are two related but distinct issues. Here are some tips for both:

To improve self-confidence:

Identify your strengths and achievements. Write them down and revisit them when you feel insecure.Practice self-care, such as getting enough sleep, exercising, and eating healthy.Set realistic goals and work towards achieving them.Focus on your progress rather than comparing yourself to others.Surround yourself with positive and supportive people.Learn from your mistakes and failures rather than dwelling on them.Challenge negative self-talk and replace it with positive affirmations.Try new things and step out of your comfort zone.

To avoid overthinking:

Recognize when you're overthinking and acknowledge that it's not productive.Set aside time to think about the issue, but limit it to a specific amount of time.Engage in activities that distract you, such as exercise or hobbies.Practice mindfulness and focus on the present moment.Write down your thoughts and feelings to gain perspective and clarity.Talk to a trusted friend or therapist about your concerns.Accept that not everything can be controlled and focus on what you can control.Remind yourself that worrying won't solve the problem and take action towards a solution.

Ans: Dear Tapash,
Overthinking happens when you try and control the result of anything/situation. These can be from a past event or a future happening both of which are not in your control.

The simple ways to move away from overthinking are:
1. Be in the NOW; start by paying attention to what you do...even if you are brushing your teeth, observe how you are doing it, how you drink of a cup of tea/coffee, how you travel to work
2. Focus on your breath; simply observe how your breath falls and rises
3. Spend time at parks and green places; you will find yourself calming down
4. Journal; every night before you sleep, write about your day - all good and not so good
5. Express gratitude; simply being thankful can change the patterns of thinking and help you calm down

Do this everyday for a month to notice a change that you will be happy about.
If you still find that things can better, seek professional help someone who has dealt with anxiety cases. But. the one month remedy does work wonders and continue even after that month to sustain the changes...

All the best!

Ans: Dear Mahesh,
Negative thoughts kisi kaaran se hi aapke dimaag mein baith gaye hain. Inko agar hataane hain toh pehle woh kaaran ko hataana hoga. Is liye apne aap se poochiye: Kis wajah se mein yeh sab soch baitha hoon? Aise soch aane se pehle kya hua hai joh mujhe aise sochne pe majboor hota hoon...

Aisi soch ko door rakhne ke liye kuch sujhaav hain:
1. Koi physical activity ya exercise roz kiya kijiye (walk, gym, run)
2. Praanyaam karne se bhi bahut faayda hota hai
3. Dost ya kareebi pariwaar ke saath waqt bitaaiye
4. Apni zindagi mein joh accha hua hai ya ho raha hai, is baat ko aksar yaad aur zikr kijiye
5. Koi kaam karne se pehle, apna phone ko silent mode mein daal dijiye

Yeh sirf sujhaav hain, baaki aapko mehnat zaroor karna padega ki yeh negative soch ko aap zyaada panaah na de. Jitna zyaada inko paalenge, utna hi aapko pareshaani hogi. Yeh dhyaan mein le aaiye ki positive ya acchi soch se aapka kya faayda ho sakta hai; maansik tanaav kam hone se aapka shareer bhi swasth hoga. Is baat ko hamesha yaad rakhiye.

All the best!

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What exactly do you get by punishing yourself? It's another way to indulge in self-pity which will only keep you in the problem zone for longer.
Instead pay attention to the reasons towards laziness and procrastination.
Ask:
- Do I display laziness with every activity or a few or one specific one?
- If Yes, which is it?
- What about that activity/situation makes me want to procrastinate and not take action on it?
- If I actually make a plan and act on that activity/situation, how will things change for me?

This will give you an idea as to what exactly happens in the mind to avoid something and what you can do about it. We are never motivated to do anything if we don not get something concrete back in return. So, define the reward clearly...
And as far as negative things go, if you choose to focus on it, obviously it will grow bigger in the mind.

Keep the above questions list with you and check at regular intervals when faced with procrastination. Have a social circle of friends who can pull you up when you are down BUT they will not be kind all the time if you are going to indulge into self-pity. So, the decision to get better, to become more positive and actually do something big in life is a decision. Focus on how much your life will change for the better when you do this and it will be a clean and quick switchover.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
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