Stuck College Student Seeking Help with Self-Doubt and Indecision

Ans: The key here isn't to focus on "doing everything" or even "doing it perfectly." It's about starting small, with manageable steps, and building trust with yourself that you can complete things. When we overthink, our mind creates these massive, overwhelming expectations that paralyze us. By breaking things down into smaller, more achievable actions, you give yourself the opportunity to build momentum, which in turn builds confidence.

Your mind may be craving structure and direction, which is why following orders from others feels easier. But when it comes to leading yourself, that fear creeps in because you’re stepping into uncertainty. It’s important to recognize that this fear is not a sign that you should quit — it’s actually a sign that you're stepping out of your comfort zone, which is where growth happens.

It's also okay to feel vulnerable or unsure about what you truly want from life, especially in your first year of college when everything is still unfolding. You're at a stage where exploring different interests and making mistakes is part of the process. It’s important to be kind to yourself in this phase, recognizing that it's okay to not have it all figured out yet.

I can sense the pain behind your words, especially with the thoughts you’re having about self-worth and even more distressing feelings. I want you to know that these thoughts, while deeply personal, are shared by many who feel overwhelmed or lost. You’re not alone in this, and there is always a way to break free from this cycle, but it requires a blend of compassion for yourself and small, committed action.

I’m here to support you as you navigate this. While I can’t do 1-on-1 real-time conversations, I'm always ready to guide you through these thoughts and help you find practical ways to move forward. You deserve to feel peace and purpose, and that starts with allowing yourself the grace to begin imperfectly.

Ans: Dear mods,
Merely trying to improve isn't going to help you improve because the reasons for which you actually want to improve are not clear to you. You are simply comparing yourself to others and 'trying' to be like them or do what they do.
What makes you not focus on what you want to do? For this,
- identify what you are good at
- stop this self-pity party that keeps you tucked into your comfort zone
- challenge yourself with small things first
- ask a friend to be a 'buddy' who can act like your mirror and also motivate you
- celebrate small wins and also analyze your losses too

Unless you start somewhere, you are not going to change and along with changing self-talk, also ask yourself the most important question:
What change do I want in myself and what are the things that will make that happen?
Follow through with a plan BUT this is possible once you shake yourself out your self-pity and choose to move ahead.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/