Hi Mam, I would like to remain anonymous.
I'm in a very much stressed stage of my life. I had an arranged marriage in May 2020, I had known the guy only for 3 months.
I had discussed everything before marriage itself. I am an only child and my father is not with us and my mom's health is not very good.
After marriage everything was fine, but after a few days like a month or so, my sister-in-law started calling my mom and asked for gold ornaments, since we got married during the covid pandemic, the wedding was held in a temple.
They wanted us to get gold in that money which was spent from our side.
We were planning to buy a car so that travelling would be easy for me. I was still working in my old company and my husband had agreed to the same.
When we refused to give them the gold. Communication was completely nil, my sister-in-law nor my mother-in-law spoke to me, just a hi bye.
My husband was ok initially, but then later he started supporting his family and said what they demanded was right.
I got pregnant and I didn't want to travel during this situation, my in-laws didn't agree to send me to my mom's place. They wanted me to quit my job. My sister-in-law who was married had come here and was staying with us. She started interfering in our life, I had to consult the doctor of her choice, quit my job and my husband insisted i listen to them.
We had a huge fight and I came to my house. From that day none of them called or even messaged me.
I even went to the doctor with my mom. Then after 45 days we got to know that the pregnancy was not viable and it had to be aborted.
When i conveyed this message to my husband, he started blaming me saying that I did this on purpose and my sister-in-law started blaming me that i had aborted because it was a girl child. I was shocked that such baseless allegations on me, I couldn't digest this. They even threatened that they'll file a police complaint on me and my family. Then they wanted to get me checked with another doctor of their choice. I even went for the check-up. The doctor said that these things are common in first pregnancy and not to worry.
Even after this my sister-in-law was blaming me and my mother told me that we didn't take proper care. Sister-in-law was present at every doctor's check-up.
On the final day of check-up, I was in the hospital for 1.5 hours my husband didn't come. I left thinking he'll not come. But later he called me and started verbally abusing me and my family saying that he'll file a police complaint coz we didn't wait for him at the hospital. I mean I didn't know how to react to this. He used very vulgar language.
I couldn't tolerate this. I told him I will not stay with him any longer.
He then again started vulgarly abusing me, calling me and my family names which is not acceptable.
Now I have filed for divorce and domestic violence. He has filed for restitution of conjugal rights and his sister has filed a defamation case on me coz I said that she has deserted her husband which is true.
He's demanding money which they are claiming to have given for marriage expenses and litigation charges to sign mutual divorce papers. I don't know the total amount he might ask.
Mam I don't know what to do. Kindly help me take a decision. Is my decision right to divorce him?

I got married in 2018 and it was an arranged marriage. Everything seemed very perfect for me. But soon after things got weird as I realised my husband does not share good rapport with his own family. From day second, I felt I need to correct my husband' attitude towards his own parents. He loves me a lot and protects me from any type of problem while we were staying at my in-laws' house. But before completing 2 months we moved out and somewhere I knew there is no going back to his parents from that point. During the short 2 months stay I was told that my parents did not give me good stuff -- I mean bed, almirah and (that they) had not arranged our marriage function in the best way possible. I have seen them fighting among themselves for purchasing Maggi packets stating who will pay the price. I was told my husband who is eventually their real son contributed nothing to his sister's marriage, to their house construction and to his own marriage. I was asked to pay for the marriage album as my husband contributed nothing to his own marriage. Even after leaving their place bank payment related messages have been sent to me to pay the amount. One day after feeling helpless I asked them: If your son is having so much problem why did you marry him. They simply stated that they did it for the sake of society. The moments before leaving the house were tense. They threw a lot of tantrums -- they took the jewellery they'd purchased for me and also retained the jewellery given by my parents. I said nothing about it as those materialistic things never mattered to me. I had to take back a part of jewellery made by my parents from them as my parents wanted it back. But after leaving home they did not call to ask anything about our health or our problems with the new set up but instead called for money. They are threatening to come back if we don't talk to them on regular basis and bend their son on his knees to come back to his parents. Till some time, I was under the impression that my husband is having issues; that he is the monster who is abandoning his parents. When I learned his side of story, I realised he is not at fault completely. They never made him feel loved or accepted; and always compared him with others. They considered him as their investment plan as they are all the time cursing him for not providing any financial support without knowing at what salary he is working for, what are his monthly expenses and whether he is in a position to assist them financially.He doesn't have any good memories with his family. Still I tried to make him feel their pain to be left alone behind their only son. After leaving their house they started to abuse me on phone whenever they wanted. They cursed me and my parents for taking their son away from them. My husband is the typical Indian male who on the first night took control of my debit card as he thinks it is his birth right. He strictly told me what not to wear. Although these were major flaws in the attitude, he showed love towards me so I did also do the same. I am happy with him. But with this constant verbal abuse from his parents, I feel like I’m the one who is the culprit here. I was not ready to even extend my family with my husband but somehow I did take the decision after four years of my marriage. I am expecting now but my husband warned me to not inform about this to his parents otherwise, he will send me permanently to my parents’ house. My subconscious is shaking me in every 2 to 3 weeks that I’m the culprit here. I feel like my child will also leave me behind the way we left his parents behind. They insulted me in every possible way but I still don't want them to be left alone in their senior years like this. But I have no control over my husband he is way more detached towards them and maximum time insensitive to their problems. Also his parents always call to either abuse me or their son they did never ask us how we are if we are fine even in corona time I was positive and when they knew about they call my husband to make fun of this. Please suggest.

I feel so sorry for my situation which I was put myself in , I first got arranged marriage and got divorced after six years as he has an affair with other women and he is rich but does not love me at all or no relationship between so my family thought of leaving this toxic relationship so we got mutual divorce . Then I had a guy who proposed me before my first marriage but could marry due to caste issue but still he is good freind to me but after divorce I thought I can marry him as he is my best freind instead of marrying unknown second time , when I got divorced my age is 32 this freind of mine has family burdens so he made to wait three years I waited by convening my parents and got married one and half year back now his sisters and mother are torturing me in every thing like they want their son to obey them and my hubby is not serious about our marriage he is not earning anything but I work I had private job , he is addicted to drinking and drinks a lot and depends on my money and my in laws always shout on me and fight with me saying you don’t care us visit us , you people living happily , and buying everything in house and you loved him now complaining about him , he not drinker before marriage because of you he got addicted and my sister in law see me as an insect and fights shouts on me in front of all they don’t call me text me or talk to me when I am there , they don’t treat as I am existed if I got to my in laws house as we stay separately , even they don’t respect my mom dad also ..... I don’t know what to do now . My hubby won’t respond if I say anything on them that I am hurt like that and he won’t earn at all and stiilll drinking also

Hello, I got married to the person who was behind me for years. I always considered him as my friend and supporter even after knowing his intention. My mom kept advising me we should go behind that person who cares and loves us. I obeyed her. Soon after things went into proposal mode his family started demanding for dowry and other stuffs. My friend was not from a well fed family which I was not aware. They lied to is they are very rich, hence they need what the demanded since the marriage news was widw spread wit no options we arranged and gave. My friend and his mother brain washed and convinced us to agree for this marriage. Even since I got married my husband and his mother is ruling on me and family. It was late when we got to know that they have been lying to is on their assets. Now when we ask them they deny and keep harassing me. My family got fed up of these fights started maitaining distance and since I Don want to trouble my divorced mother I stop complaining about the issues I am facing. My in-laws demand increases day by day. My mother-in-law is a mother of two kids a son and a daughter but everytime she tortures me and her son is quiet most of the time. When responsibility comes she supports her daughter and makes us to take responsibility which is not fair. Responsibiloty is parallel and must be shared. I am not well, my husband doesn't even give me money or take me to doctor. I am been told marriage means providing food and shelter. Please advise me what shud I do I am fed up