Mam, I am retired father in law and financial well off. My son got married five years back. It is arranged marriage through matrimony. My son and daughter in law are both post degree qualified and well placed and staying with us. We tried asking for some money from both of them for monthly family expenses after two years of marriage which daughter in law refused and said you want dowry in this form, she record conversations, threat us of stree mukti, of police complaint , object our daughter visiting our place, blames us etc. Very often, she fight with her husband as well. We are only in reactive mode every time and accommodate her. Nowadays, she has started demanding the money spent by her mother in marriage and frequently leave our house and stay with her mother. We are afraid that she does not fake complain and harrasss us. Does not have any respect to relation, relatives, isolated /self centric, high ego and make other irritate type of personality, thinks of herself, does not believe that there is world outside. Please advise.

I am 64, retired living in own house together with wife, son and daughter -in law for last five years. Both, son and daughter are professionally qualified, well placed and earn good. The daughter - in law out of last five years stayed away for half the time for one reason or the other at her mother place. She is very egoistic and arrogant and fight with everyone in family for no great reason including, son and my married daughter whenever she comes to our place to meet us. She has an objection her coming to our place. She has ones threatened us of complaining to police and women organization, Stree Mukti Sanghatana. She makes mountain out of anthill every time so we have stopped talking to her. The couple is staying with us, we bear all family expenses and don't expect even a penny from both son and Daughter in - law as ,when ones money of Rs. 15 K was asked to, she refused and made an allegation that we want dowry in this form . Son help us with some monthly expenses every month. She is staying alone away from us for more than 6 months now. My son is also tired of her behavior. We even have approached her mother, she also keep hand on deaf ears as she also does not listen to her and one brother. Please advice, what do we do in the circumstances?

I am 64, retired living in own house together with wife, son and daughter -in law for last five years. Both, son and daughter are professionally qualified, well placed and earn good. The daughter - in law out of last five years stayed away for half the time for one reason or the other at her mother place. She is very egoistic and arrogant and fight with everyone in family for no great reason including, son and my married daughter whenever she comes to our place to meet us. She has an objection her coming to our place. She has ones threatened us of complaining to police and women organization, Stree Mukti Sanghatana. She makes mountain out of anthill every time so we have stopped talking to her. The couple is staying with us, we bear all family expenses and don't expect even a penny from both son and Daughter in - law as ,when ones money of Rs. 15 K was asked to, she refused and made an allegation that we want dowry in this form . Son help us with some monthly expenses every month. She is staying alone away from us for more than 6 months now. My son is also tired of her behavior. We even have approached her mother, she also keep hand on deaf ears as she also does not listen to her and one brother. Please advice, what do we do in the circumstances?

Thanks Anu Ma'am for you valueable response and suggestion. I will again give it a try to take her to professional who can councel her and guide for infusion into a family system. Yes, her maternal home don't provide a great smooth family relationships as her mother always complains about her Late mother in law and husband (my father in law). She always says that my father in law has given all his 15 years earned money from a govt job to his mother (my wife's Daadi). The same pattern of complaining is being followed here also about my mother, though I spend a little portion of (10%) of my income on my mother's care. But still I also listens this type of taunts. The other things you had said that with that 27 year old guy whatever happened will be blamed on me, yes, this has already happened she is saying that she met that guy only after my insistence but the truth is they both were getting attracted and smiling at each other before my go ahead. I definitely want to stay in this marriage for my daughter's sake and will give it a try as per your suggestion. Thank you once again.

Dear Anu, my only son (40), settled in USA, choose a girl of his choice and we agreed for their marriage in 2012. They are blessed with a son on 8 years. My daughter in law developed deep hate and repulsive feelings for my wife (65) is behaving extremely bad with my wife everytime, whenever we visit them. However she is just OK with me. My son is also observed all this but could not do any thing. My wife looks towards me for my intervention. What should I do in this situation? Kindly advice.