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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  |119 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 15, 2024

Ashish Sehgal has over 20 years of experience as a counsellor. He holds a doctorate in neuro linguistic programming, mental health and social welfare.He is certified in neurolinguistics by both the Society of NLP and the American Board of NLP.... more
suresh Question by suresh on Jul 13, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

i have physical relation with my elder brother wife with mutual understanding since last 8 years, now she want to stop this, i also want that, but again there is any situation create by destiny , we found some space alone and done the same again. so plz suggest what to do to stop this.

Ans: It's commendable that both of you recognize the need to stop this relationship for the sake of maintaining family integrity and personal values. Here are some steps you can take to create boundaries and prevent this situation from recurring:

Open Communication: Have a direct and honest conversation with her about the importance of ending this relationship. Reiterate that you both want to stop and agree on maintaining firm boundaries.

Avoid Alone Time: Make a conscious effort to avoid situations where you might be alone together. This can include family gatherings, social events, or any scenario where you might find yourselves in a private setting.

Set Clear Boundaries: Establish clear and specific boundaries. This can include physical distance, limiting personal interactions, and refraining from engaging in intimate conversations.

Create Accountability: Inform a trusted friend or family member about your decision to stop this relationship. Having someone who can provide support and hold you accountable can be very helpful.

Focus on Your Commitments: Redirect your energy and attention towards your own relationship and commitments. Invest in strengthening your relationship with your spouse and addressing any underlying issues there.

Seek Professional Help: Consider seeking counseling or therapy to work through the emotional and psychological aspects of this situation. A professional can help you develop strategies to maintain boundaries and resolve any residual feelings.

Develop New Habits: Engage in new activities or hobbies that can occupy your time and reduce the chances of encountering tempting situations.

Stay Mindful: Practice mindfulness and self-awareness to recognize and control impulses that may lead to crossing boundaries again.

By consciously implementing these strategies, you can create a supportive environment that reinforces your decision to stop this relationship and maintain respect for your family dynamics.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1563 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 01, 2024
Relationship
Respected Madam, I am a 44 years old unmarried man. I didn't get any girl due to my low income & because I have only bachelor degree, but my younger brother married before 7 years. I have good & emotional bonding with my younger brother's wife (37 years old) in these 7 years. I always tell her all my feelings about depression & loneliness. I tried yoga & meditation. I tried reading books. I tried travelling on tours, but nothing worked. I told my brother's wife nothing is working. To my surprise, she offered me physical relation with her for some days. I immediately told her I love my brother & can't cheat him. She said she also loves my brother & she is not watching it as cheating. According to her, it's a medical cure from her side to get me out from depression. She said she will always love my brother, but as of now, she just wants to see me happy. She said if physical satisfaction will result in my happiness, then she is ready for this. She said medicines will not work in my situation. I have asked her to give me sometime to think about it. I know her from 7 years. She is a good genuine woman. She & my brother has a child. We do flirting with each other sometimes, but never made any such move. Now, you tell what should I do ??
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Either she is very smart to suggest this OR very silly...you will know it!
Please stay away from it; it will lead to serious complications within the family and also may result in breaking relationships. They have a family; respect it and first thing, stop communicating with her. She seems to have some agenda in mind or is also attracted to you and trying to mask it as HELP to you.
At least you be the smarter one and think! Stay off of this please...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4361 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Mar 21, 2025

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Career
My son got 91 percentile in jee mains session 1, category- GEN EWS Is he eligible for jee advanced and which colleges can he get with this percentile
Ans: Aaditya Sir, He will be eligible for JEE Advanced. As far as the Colleges he will be eligible to get, here is, How to Predict Your Son's Chances of Admission into NIT or IIIT or GFTI After JEE Main Results – A Step-by-Step Guide

Once the January JEE Main session results was declared, many students and JEE applicants started asking common questions about eligibility for specific institutes (NITs, IIITs, GFTIs, etc.) based on their percentile, category, preferred branch, and home state.

Providing precise admission chances for each student can be challenging. Some reputed educational websites offer ‘College Predictor’ tools where you can check possible college options based on your percentile, category, and preferences. However, for a more accurate understanding, here’s a simple yet effective 9-step method using JoSAA’s past-year opening and closing ranks. This approach gives you a fair estimate (though not 100% exact) of your son's admission chances based on the previous year’s data.

Step-by-Step Guide to Check Your Admission Chances Using JoSAA Data
Step 1: Collect Your Son's Key Details
Before starting, note down the following details:

Your JEE Main percentile (Convert your percentile into All India Rank with the help of a formula available in Google).
Your son's category (General-Open, SC, ST, OBC-NCL, EWS, PwD categories)
Preferred institute types (NIT, IIIT, GFTI)
Preferred locations (or if you're open to any location in India)
List of at least 3 preferred academic programs (branches) as backups (instead of relying on just one option)
Step 2: Access JoSAA’s Official Opening & Closing Ranks
Go to Google and type: JoSAA Opening & Closing Ranks 2024
Click on the first search result (official JoSAA website).
You will land directly on JoSAA’s portal, where you can enter your details to check past-year cutoffs.
Step 3: Select the Round Number
JoSAA conducts five rounds of counseling.
For a safer estimate, choose Round 4, as most admissions are settled by this round.
Step 4: Choose the Institute Type
Select NIT, IIIT, or GFTI, depending on your preference.
If he is open to all types of institutes, check them one by one instead of selecting all at once.
Step 5: Select the Institute Name (Based on Location)
It is recommended to check institutes one by one, based on your preferred locations.
Avoid selecting ‘ALL’ at once, as it may create confusion.
Step 6: Select Your Preferred Academic Program (Branch)
Enter the branches your son is interested in, one at a time, in your preferred order.
Step 7: Submit and Analyze Results
After selecting the relevant details, click the ‘SUBMIT’ button.
The system will display Opening & Closing Ranks of the selected institute and branch for different categories.
Step 8: Note Down the Opening & Closing Ranks
Maintain a notebook or diary to record the Opening & Closing Ranks for each institute and branch you are interested in.
This will serve as a quick reference during JoSAA counseling.
Step 9: Adjust Your Expectations on a Safer Side
Since Opening & Closing Ranks fluctuate slightly each year, always adjust the numbers for safety.
Example Calculation:
If the Opening & Closing Ranks for NIT Delhi | Mechanical Engineering | OPEN Category show 8622 & 26186 (for Home State), consider adjusting them to 8300 & 23000 (on a safer side).
If the Female Category rank is 34334 & 36212, adjust it to 31000 & 33000.
Follow this approach for Other State candidates Option also and different categories.
Pro Tip: Adjust your son's expected rank slightly lower than the previous year's cutoffs for realistic expectations during JoSAA counseling.

Hope this guide helps! All the best for your Son's admissions!

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8124 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 21, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 28, 2025Hindi
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Money
I have invested in NPS (60000 per year) & PPF (125000 per year) UTI Index funds (50000 per year) emergency funds (75000 per year) after excluding all my expenses i can save 10k more. Which mutual funds i should invest?
Ans: Your existing investments are well-structured across different asset classes.

You are contributing Rs. 60,000 annually to NPS, ensuring retirement security.

Your PPF contribution of Rs. 1,25,000 provides tax-free growth and stability.

Your emergency fund of Rs. 75,000 annually ensures financial security.

However, index fund investment needs reconsideration for better growth potential.

Limitations of Index Funds
Index funds only replicate market performance and do not offer active management benefits.

Actively managed funds have a chance to outperform benchmarks over time.

Professional fund managers adjust portfolios based on market trends.

Index funds provide no flexibility during market downturns.

Market-cap-weighted indices allocate more to overvalued stocks, increasing risk.

Maximizing the Additional Rs. 10,000 Savings
Your Rs. 10,000 monthly surplus can enhance long-term wealth creation.

Investing in actively managed funds can provide higher potential returns.

Diversifying into growth-oriented equity mutual funds can be beneficial.

Sectoral and thematic funds can be explored for strategic allocation.

Avoiding overlapping funds ensures better risk-adjusted returns.

Choosing the Right Mutual Funds
Flexi-Cap Funds
Suitable for long-term growth and diversification.

Fund managers allocate across large, mid, and small-cap stocks.

Adaptability to market conditions enhances return potential.

Mid-Cap and Small-Cap Funds
Higher risk but potential for superior returns over 10-15 years.

Ideal for investors with long investment horizons.

Helps in wealth accumulation with disciplined SIPs.

Focused Funds
Invest in a limited number of high-potential stocks.

Better risk-adjusted returns with concentrated allocation.

Suitable for investors who can handle market fluctuations.

Sectoral and Thematic Funds
Focus on industries like manufacturing, technology, or consumption.

Good for long-term investment based on economic trends.

Requires careful selection to align with market cycles.

Ensuring Tax Efficiency
Long-term capital gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.

Short-term gains are taxed at 20%.

Selecting funds with a long-term view minimizes tax impact.

Avoid frequent withdrawals to preserve compounding benefits.

Final Insights
Your financial planning is strong with disciplined investments.

Redirecting index fund investments to actively managed funds can improve growth.

Your additional Rs. 10,000 savings should be allocated strategically.

A mix of flexi-cap, mid-cap, small-cap, and focused funds ensures diversification.

Reviewing your portfolio periodically ensures alignment with financial goals.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4361 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Mar 21, 2025

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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