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Mohit Arora |42 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating Coach - Answered on Dec 16, 2023

Mohit Arora is a relationship coach, image consultant, soft skills trainer and the founder of Real Dating School. He has a BTech degree in computer science from the Rayat & Bahra Institute of Engineering and Biotechnology, Mohali, Punjab. He has been conducting customised skilling and communication workshops since 2014.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 07, 2023Hindi

Hi Mohit, I love my wife but she is not happy with me. We are married for 15 years and have a 12-year-old daughter. I am working and she is a homemaker. I am unable to meet her high expectations. What should I do?

Ans: This is an incomplete question. Will need to know why she is unhappy. What's the dialogue?

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Anu Krishna |836 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 04, 2022

Question by S - Jan 04, 2022Hindi

Hi Anu, how are you? I don’t have a good married life. My wife and I always think differently. She hates me and living with me. We don't have a good intimate relationship. A few years back, she wanted divorce me but stopped due to children and family pressure. She also tried to stay with another person in the past. She is not satisfied with me. We’ve completed 13 years and, since the last seven years, life is bad with her. She is staying with me and the children but not with a happy mind. She is a good devotee but she is not happy. She thinks I spoiled her life. Need your kind advice. S

Ans:

Dear S,

She is a good devotee? I can’t quite understand this statement. And she hates you? How?

If what you have mentioned are facts, then isn’t it time for the two of you to evaluate if it’s worth living together?

If you are continuing with the marriage for the sake of the children, then do understand that there are certain ways in which you should behave so that the children do not absorb the stress that the two of you are facing.

If you keep arguing or fighting in front of them, it will affect them emotionally.

It is time that the two of you have a conversation as mature adults and sort this out quickly before it consumes the children. Else, make the sane decision of going your separate ways.

If you can’t do this by yourselves, seek professional help as soon as possible.

Do remember, it takes two people to make a marriage work, so look within yourself as well to see what you can change to smooth things over and work on that.

All the best and a Happy 2022.

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Anu Krishna |836 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 11, 2022

Question by BPH - Feb 11, 2022Hindi

Anu, I have been married for 3 years now, and things are not good between me and my wife. We have a kid of 2 years, but my wife is angry with me. She went to her home for pregnancy and she is not ready to come back to our house. I am not able to convince her to get her back to our home. Even my in-laws are not doing any effort to convince her.I spoke to her regarding is she really interested in continuing this relationship, but she is not ready to break this relationship. I am fed up of this and don't know what to do. Please help me.

Ans:

Dear BPH,

I have no clue what led to this breakdown in your marriage. Whatever the reason, I wish the two of you know what this is doing to the child.

I am not judging either of you but there is something that is keeping her away from coming back. Kindly involve a Marriage therapist or any expert who can step in.

She needs to know that moving on or leaving, one of that has to happen. At least, the mind can fathom how to manage either of the paths.

From the little information that you have given, this is what I can guide you with.

Speak with her about involving a marriage therapist or you appeal to her with love and compassion to start the discussion for the way ahead.

All the best and make a move on this soon.

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Anu Krishna |836 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 03, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 02, 2023Hindi

Hello Mam, I am 45 year old IT professional, I have good salary and owning 3 flats. My wife is also working and she also having descent salary. I am having family of 4, Me, wife, daughter 11 years and son 8 years old. My problem here is, we are having discussion on only future and not living current life. My wife is think more about money and how to get money quickly as possible for further provisions like kids education, retirement etc. Also, She doesnt want to spend on me especilaly, never got any gift from her. We are not having good physical relation. Many times i have discussed with her and went through doctor for consultantion and medication. But, she doesnt want to take medicines.I feel very bad and my life is similar as earlier. Many times feels like she doesnt love me. My life become mechanic and no joy init. I am just living for my Kids betterment.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Well no two people in a marriage are the same, are they?
You just have different ideals stemming from different value systems. this can be bridged by actually talking about it, so that either of you might not be on a extreme. If she likes to save, you can moderate her by actually setting a budget for spending on necessities and luxuries.
And she will in turn moderate you, if she finds you spending on things that are unnecessary.
It's about seeing things on the same page but with different glasses and acknowledging that you are both different.
As far as physical intimacy goes, I guess many couples face a slump after children occupying a huge part of their lives and with full-time jobs, it can make one tired more than excited. Set aside time to be alone with one another and practice the art of non-sexual intimacy like holding hands, cuddling, hugging...
Sometimes to jump out of the mechanical life, you need to do something different and exciting to get a different and exciting result. So do what you haven't done before! Get the drift here?

All the best!