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CA Aspirant Struggling with Demotivation: Feeling Stuck - What Can I Do?

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1437 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 03, 2025

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jan 02, 2025Hindi
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Hi Sir/Ma'am, I am here to know if there is a problem with my mind or body as I am having a strong sense of demotivation to work towards the upcoming exams. I had taken a 3 months study leave from my work for the upcoming exams to be held in January . The first month was excellent but the next was not good and last month was pathetic. For the past 2 months I have been trying to work hard sincerely but failed. I sat at the study table, but could not achieve my targets. I wrote the targets , but still failed to complete them. I tried watching self help videos and read self help books but nothing is helping me. Today, it is like my brain signals not to work towards any of my targets. I am a CA aspirant and I tried all these ways but nothing worked for me. My exams are in 9 days and my family is not ready to give me any more chances because this is my 7th attempt. Even if I talk about this problem with my family, they become extremely negative and say harsh words about my future. Since I do not have family or friends to talk about it , could you please provide me sincere help in this ?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Kindly work with someone who can get you out of this mindset and into a mindset that is not motivating but also inspiring. Right now what you face is lack of inspiration which is understandable given the many attempts. But you are aware that some professional exams are like this; so persevere...
If it makes sense, take a break from it all...Breaks can refresh the mind and also help you realign yourself back to your goal. But make sure it's a short break and not something that will get you to a place of procrastinating. The break is to help you slow down the mind so that you can bring yourself back to your goal and take necessary steps to achieve it.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  |120 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 06, 2023

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Sir as i do partial drop with bsc i decided to give my third attempt in last but at end 3 months before my exams i feel ill ,my both college exam and this exam come college exam finish exactly 1 day ago i am always a topper in school ,college but i feel like devested i am 19 soon to be 20 i know i can't give my 100 percent but i feel like dead now getting depressed as my brother ,sister get their respective dream college i am still struggling i feel like a lost ,failure ,directionless ,defeated daily i feel like miserable althought it not my fault I feel bad like how miserable i become because of that i can't even focus a single thing i even started eating less food ,locking myself ,silence nobody is mocking me but i feel like i lost myself how should I will be successful again Being doctor is my always dream ,i standup on my own 2 times but now i feel like devested can you please tell me how to get harmony and again in my life and be successful
Ans: I'm really sorry to hear that you're feeling this way, but I can offer some guidance and support to help you regain your motivation and find success again.

Recognize that setbacks are normal: It's important to understand that setbacks and challenges are a part of life. Many successful individuals have faced failures before achieving their goals. It's essential to see this phase as a temporary setback rather than a reflection of your worth or abilities.

Take care of your mental and physical health: Your well-being should be your top priority. Make sure you're getting enough sleep, eating nutritious meals, and engaging in regular exercise. Taking care of your physical health can positively impact your mental well-being and help you regain focus and motivation.

Seek support: Talk to someone you trust about your feelings. It could be a family member, friend, or a professional counselor. Sharing your emotions can provide relief and help you gain a fresh perspective on your situation. Additionally, professional guidance can assist you in developing coping strategies and setting realistic goals.

Set small, achievable goals: Rather than overwhelming yourself with the pressure of becoming successful immediately, break down your ultimate goal of becoming a doctor into smaller, manageable steps. Celebrate each milestone you achieve, no matter how small. This will help you stay motivated and build momentum.

Learn from your experiences: Reflect on the challenges you've faced and the mistakes you've made. Use them as opportunities for growth and learning. Understand that setbacks can provide valuable lessons that contribute to future success. Embrace a growth mindset that sees failures as stepping stones toward improvement.

Rediscover your passion: Reconnect with your love for becoming a doctor. Remember why you initially pursued this dream and the impact you hope to make in people's lives. Reignite your passion by researching inspiring stories, engaging in related activities, or volunteering in healthcare settings.

Develop a routine and study plan: Establish a structured routine that includes dedicated study time. Break down your syllabus into manageable portions and create a study plan to cover all the necessary topics. Consistency and discipline will help you regain focus and make progress toward your goals.

Celebrate your strengths: Acknowledge your past achievements and the strengths that have helped you succeed in the past. Remind yourself of your abilities and the qualities that make you unique. Cultivating a positive self-image can boost your confidence and motivation.

Stay positive and resilient: Avoid dwelling on negative thoughts or comparing yourself to others. Remember that everyone has their own journey, and success comes at different times for different people. Maintain a positive outlook, even during challenging times, and believe in your ability to overcome obstacles.

Take breaks and practice self-care: It's important to take breaks and engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Engage in hobbies, spend time with loved ones, or engage in mindfulness practices like meditation or yoga. Self-care is essential for maintaining a healthy balance in life.

Remember, success is a journey, and setbacks are part of the process. Stay resilient, believe in yourself, and keep moving forward. With determination, perseverance, and the right support, you can regain your harmony, rediscover your path, and achieve your dreams.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1437 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 10, 2023

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Hi mam i give neet with partial drop three times i always wanted to be a doctor in my whole family my brother and sister get their desired colleges i am not jealous of them but i sometimes feel neglected then i worked hard on my dreams as at my third attempt as i give at three months before it my final exam of college of other subject start i can't even quit that because i fear my family disappointment then i didn't able to give my 100 fully that makes me satisfied i feel so depressed that i didn't have courage to check marks while everyone is celebrating their success i feel lost can't i feel complete one good dream for myself all my family support me to do whatever you want but i can't decide i feel like tragiec the faith all i have put in myself feel like useless i crave to be success do something for my own but i can't known that such thing occur unexpectedly i feel depressed and my family think i am just doing because to gain their attention ,i keep unnessary exceptions from me ,is it crime to keep big dream althought i worked hard but it didn't take outi feel like lost all how can I get up and achieve something feel proud of myself
Ans: Dear Yadnya,
Dream Big and never be afraid to Fail. Most often, we are told that failure is not an option. Failure when accepted as a part of life, then loses power over us.
1. Never become attached to the outcome so that fear does not play in your mind
2. Understand that We win some and Lose some and losing does not mean all is lost
3. Draw a clear plan to achieve your goal
4. Work on your state of mind for optimum performance
5. Develop hobbies outside of studies that can support you have a positive outlook on a daily basis
6. Family and friends are your best support system, so talk to them regularly about your challenges to enable them to support you

Smile and dream big again; tomorrow is another new day.

All the best!

..Read more

Maxim

Maxim Emmanuel  |391 Answers  |Ask -

Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on May 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 20, 2024Hindi
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Sir, I am 27 years old, Single. Its been 2 years + I am doing private 3 years project contractual job this contractual job.its going to complete in Dec 31st 2024. I gave Ctet teacher exam but i failed 3 time. But i m not focusing in State tet so, i want focus but in market lots of content and i dont have gude what shall i do. I am not happy with my current job. This job changes me alot in my caracter now, i cant sleep properly because if this job will finished what shall i do, till yet i have not creck any exam. And if i go in market i started to forgot ex:- After giving money i forgot to take back, after giving money i forgot to take things sometime. My age also gainig if want to marry so, i have earned money or save money i have to bear all expenses because my parents financially poor if I want save, same time i need to look my younger brother study expenses i need to bear and family running mantainance and also have EMI loans need to pay and also i am helping my parents to build their house with my own money my parents does not have money for my marriage. Now i have overthinking, depression, fear, feeling lossing confident, my dream job also get critical in this situation what shall i do. In office also staff try to polling down because i am getting higher salary what shall i do. For this reason just resently my health conditions because worse my pressure 139 felt vomit feel dizzy. What shall I do now Sir.
Ans: I have gone through your query and understand that you are at the Cross roads of Life.

It's at these times... When the going gets tough... The tough gets gong.
That's your strength.. A tough resilient young lady!
Kindly note you are doing an excellent job hence rewarded with better pay in your organization.. Obviously there's going to be jealousy..Be calm & Handle it with maturity.

Now I understand you are very committed selfless person. Who's contributing a lot to your family,... Wow in fact helping build your own new house. !

In regards to your contractual job, talk to your employer, let them know, that you would have to look for another job post December 2024 if there's no clear further commitment.

In regard to your marriage at 27 you aren't too old to find a like minded partner don't rush and regret, start the process through matrimonial apps.

I see you talk about your health, especially blood pressure, well that's because you are unduly stressed.
Add tender coconut water to your diet, talk to a proper Ayurvedic doctor..!

I am sure you will get over this mid life syndrome and invite us all for your happy day!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4053 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Nov 13, 2024

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DEAR, MA'AM YEAH DIR I DONT KNOW IF YOU ARE REPLAY ME OR NOT I TURN TO 25 THIS YEAR. I AM A ASPIRANT OF SSC CGL AND I HEARTINGLY WANT THIS I HAVE A CLEAR GOAL. ON WHICH I AM ALSO WORK IT BUT I STARTED LATE AND I THOUGHT MY AGE IS TOO MUCH I HAVE ALSO SO MUCH FINANCIAL OROBLEM. MY PARENT'S HEALTH AND ALSO MY HEALTH ARE WORST DAY BY DAY DUE TO ANXIETY . I AM NOT WILLING TO STUDY I GOT 113IN PRELIMS THIS YEAR IT WAS MY FIRST ATTEMPT BUT I CANT MOVE ON FROM THIS. WHAT DID I DO SO THAT I CAN AGAIN FOCUS ON MY STUDIES SO MUCH NEGATIVE THOUGHTS AND DESIRE GRAB ME I CAN'T CONTROL MYSELF????.
Ans: Please post your question in 'small letters' in the future. Anyway, coming to your current question, despite challenges, having a clear objective and the will to achieve it can help you refocus and recover control. To manage health and anxiety, identify your emotions, seek help, and focus on good living styles like exercise, sleep, and healthy food. Control stress regarding money by finding part-time or freelancing projects or government programs. Change your SSC CGL preparation method by evaluating your performance, creating smaller objectives, establishing a disciplined daily schedule, fighting negative ideas, limiting distractions, using resources wisely, and maintaining a positive outlook.

Finally, prioritize your family's health and well-being, even if it means standing stagnant. Remember that even little progress forward is preferable than standing stagnant. Remember that your resilience is already evident, and your will to rise once more counts. If you feel overwhelmed, don't hesitate to ask for assistance or have a conversation with your friends and family members. All the BEST for Your Prosperous Future.

To know more on ‘ Careers | Education | Jobs’, ask / follow Us here in RediffGURUS.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |505 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 16, 2025Hindi
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I am 31 years old and have been married for 6 years. My relatives keep pressuring me and scaring me, saying that I haven’t had a child yet and that I should have one now. However, we are not financially prepared at the moment. We have just bought a house, and the loans have recently started, which exhausted all our savings for the down payment. My husband’s family had a very weak financial background. They had nothing, and he struggled a lot, even living in someone else’s house to complete his education. Only he knows how hard it was. Now, his salary has improved, and I am also employed. Additionally, we are entirely responsible for my in-laws, as my husband’s elder brother neither got married nor provides any support for the parents. We are under a lot of pressure right now, but everyone just keeps asking us when we are going to have a child. I’ve seen how my husband struggled with limited finances when the family was financially weak, and I don’t want to show such hardships to our children. On top of that, I am overweight and focused on losing weight to ensure I can be healthy. I feel very stressed and confused, but my husband is fully supportive of me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
First of all, I am really glad that you are being so responsible and practical, rather than making such life-changing decisions based on emotions alone. Second, don't worry about other's opinions; they might have your best interest at heart, but this should be solely your decision. You should have a child only when you are ready to have one- both mentally, physically, and financially. And no hard and fast rule says you should have a child within a certain year of your marriage. Two people in a marriage is a whole family too; a child can add to the joy if that is what you want. But if not, your family is still complete. Please remember that.

Take care of your health and your mind. If you are worried about your age, you can always go see a doctor and see how many years you can delay this. Rushing is never a good idea.

Best Wishes.

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Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |1144 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 16, 2025Hindi
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Career
I'm a bsc botany graduate and now got admission and doing msc. I'm in first year and just gave my 1st semester exam but somehow now i feel i can't do botany at all its not just in my interest. I can't continue further with it as i dont think there's much scope too. I have interest in fields like geography or law related subjects. I'll be attempting for upsc too this year and also had a second thought to go for Law. Should i drop the msc? ....I've cried a lot thinking about that and its affecting my mental health too.
Ans: Hello dear.
First I would like to suggest that, in any way, you first complete your M.Sc. (Botnay) either with interest or without interest. Who told you that there is less scope in Botany? There are a lot of career options after M.Sc. (Botany).It is good that you are interested in geography and are attempting UPSC this year. Dear, along with your M.Sc. you can easily appear for UPSC and do the study of Geography, after completing your M.Sc. you can take the admission to Law course. Many people do the law even after their retirement or in due course of their service. There is no need to cry about the things which happened to you.
Suggestions: (1) Completer M.Sc. (Botany) by any means (2) Space-time to read Geography and UPSC Syllabus (3) Develop your overall personality and try to engage in some extracurricular activities of your interest.
Best of luck for your upcoming bright future.

If satisfied, please like and follow me.
If dissatisfied with the reply, please ask again without hesitation.
Thanks.

Radheshyam

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