Hi, I'm someone. Sorry for taking your time please read this and help me I really need someone to guide me in my life right now. Sorry for this long mail. I would be really glad if you take time and read this.
I am 23 years old, a married girl. I got married to my husband on December 10 2021 last year. It was an arranged marriage. Our family met along with us in 2019 and fixed our marriage. At first I didn't wanted to marry because it was too early and I was just pursuing my bachelor's degree but my family didn't listen to me as I was the elder one so they wanted me to get married before they got old.
I agreed and slowly started developing a fondness and liking towards my fiance and later fell in love with him. But after our marriage things started to feel a bit weird. He has too many female friends which I'm absolutely fine with. I'm not that conservative. They all were invited in our wedding and I met them. they seem nice people but one of his friends is bothering. Let’s call her Y. My husband keeps talking to her on calls and messages all the time and the conversations are absolutely boring like they don't have anything to talk but still they keep up the conversation. I used to think it's fine or maybe I'm being too possessive but when I got to know that he spent 12 lakh on her I was shocked. He also spends money on her on a daily basis. He books an Uber for her daily. Whenever she needs anything he will immediately say I will bring it for you. Y is also married her husband is fine with it because he also takes money from my husband. In fact her whole family takes money. They're financially not very strong so I understand this thing of helping someone. What I don't understand is why does my husband have to talk to her all the time? Even when I'm sitting right in front of him he would ignore me.
Apart from Y, there is one more person he treats the same way, his ex.
A few days after our marriage I checked his phone (I know it's wrong but my instinct let me do to so cause of his behaviour) and I found some messages from 2019 between my husband and his ex. The conversations clearly proved that they were in a relationship and broke up in 2019. When I asked him indirectly as I didn't want him to know that I checked his phone he said that the (ex) is his sister. He lied! And I found that they are still friends which I understand. I'm fine with that. But I cannot be fine with them talking on a daily basis and my husband fulfilling all her wishes just like the first girl Y. He even took a screenshot her picture (ex) and saved it when she uploaded it on her WhatsApp status a few days after our marriage. When I asked him why are you keeping her picture, he denied and said oh aise hi, I guess by mistake So I ignored that. But he calls and sends gifts to her. He even takes me along with him to buy presents for her so that I don't think that it's wrong.
I always ask him why are you talking to your ex and Y all the time; you don't even spend time with me. Because of this there are lots of fights happening between us. He said he has work load and is frustrated with his life, dealing with depression, so to avoid those feelings he talks with his friends. I understood and allowed him to talk but he spends Rs 8,000-9,000 every month on them. He once said that he has to give them money so that they won't stop talking with him; that's how friendship works including Rs 5,000 flight ticket and taking loan worth Rs 12-13 lakh for them. I am a fool in love so I got easily manipulated and allowed him but not completely. I set a limit for him to not over spend more than Rs 5000 per month on them.
My family and friends are constantly suggesting that I leave him as he doesn't care about my feelings that I have given him way too many chances. Whenever I try to confront him for meeting up with them or spending too much money on them he immediately starts caring for me the next day. Because of this I always get confused that maybe he loves me too and I'm just being a possessive wife. I told him I will divorce you if you keep treating me like this and keep talking to your girls day and night. He said I shouldn’t talk like that and doesn't want me to divorce him as he loves me and he wouldn't have chosen me in the first place if he liked them.
Whenever I try to confront him about the girls, he says I think you have a boyfriend and you are cheating on me. Give me your phone I will check your phone.
I heard call recordings of him and Y. He records the conversations he has with the girls. When I asked he said he does it so that those girls or anyone won't blame him in future that he said something wrong. Anyway, I heard my husband saying bad things about me to Y in one of those recordings after being frustrated with me as I fought with him because of them. I was really broken. He said I don't give him space which is not true and he wants to go alone to places like markets or KFC or wherever he wants but I'm not letting him do that. At the same time he asked Y if she wants to join him and meet up at a certain place. I don't understand him. If there isn't anything wrong then why is he talking with her day and night and not being bored and with me he rarely spends time and wants space.
His parents are fed up with him they told me he has been like this always. They support me and want him to get away from those girls. They married me to him so that he would leave those girls and stop spending such big amounts of money on them. But he doesn't want to get away from them. He said that if by chance one day those girls stopped talking to him for some reason then he will definitely leave them. But they never stop. I don't understand why is he waiting for them to stop and why doesn't HE wants to stop. Depression? Maybe I don't know. I even told him let's meet up with a therapist but he refused and said he's fine and I'm being dramatic.
He talks to them at work and at home.
If he doesn't talk to them for a day he will get mad. I remember one time he was panicked and kept saying I want to talk to Y. It's not like they are blackmailing and stuff; they don't even want to talk with him. He is the one who keeps calling them; it's very weird. He is fighting with his family, fighting with me, just for them. He manipulates me a lot. He has lied to me several times about not meeting with Y.
Please advice what I should do. My friends say I should divorce him as my mental health is deteriorating because of him. I love him a lot but he doesn't care. He says he loves me but I don't find honesty in those words as he keeps repeating the things that bother me and our relation.

Ans: Their Average package for placements should be around 10 lpa.

Ans: FMS is the best. Followed by XLRI, IIFT, MDI, etc.

Ans: Great. Looks like a good course. Since it has industry collaboration it would give you practical exposure.

Ans: Not much. Research is usually a domain of science. Though you can do PhD in allied fields.

Ans: Any one of the following exams - CAT, XAT, SNAP, NMAT, MBA CET, CMAT, MAT, ATMA, GMAT

Ans: Do both. Prepare for Competitive exam and also try being MP or MLA. But I believe you have already crossed the age to get into govt job through competitive exams.

Ans: Thank you for sharing detailed information. You already have a disciplined approach to savings. You are clearly focused on long-term goals. Let's now look at the best approach to meet those goals.

 
 
 

Income and Savings Review
Your monthly in-hand salary is Rs.1.2 lakh. That gives a good base.

 
 
 

After all deductions, you can save Rs.50,000 monthly. That is a strong habit.

 
 
 

With two kids, financial responsibilities are high. You are still managing savings. Appreciate it.

 
 
 

Let’s now assess each of your investments.

 
 
 

Review of Existing Investments
PPF of Rs.8.5 lakh with Rs.12,500 monthly. Good for long-term. Safe and tax-free.

 
 
 

Sukanya for your daughter with Rs.4.8 lakh is well-planned. Continue it till she turns 14.

 
 
 

NPS of Rs.1.5 lakh with Rs.8,560 monthly. It builds retirement corpus. Continue it.

 
 
 

EPFO of Rs.6.5 lakh is part of your salary benefits. That’s a stable addition to retirement.

 
 
 

NPS for your son is a new initiative. It’s too early to predict its usefulness.

 
 
 

Post office RPLI in wife’s name with Rs.1.3 lakh. Yearly Rs.22,000 is manageable.

 
 
 

Overall, you have built a strong base with safe and regular investments. But these are mostly conservative. They may not beat inflation by a good margin.

 
 
 

Let’s now look at your primary goals.

 
 
 

Goal 1: Buying a Flat in Hyderabad
This is a big financial goal. Needs careful planning and timing.

 
 
 

You have zero savings for down payment now. That limits immediate action.

 
 
 

Buying now through a loan will put pressure on your cash flow.

 
 
 

If you go for loan now, EMI may be Rs.30,000–Rs.35,000 monthly.

 
 
 

That leaves you with very little for future goals and emergencies.

 
 
 

It is better to avoid rushing to buy flat now.

 
 
 

You can start a savings plan for down payment. Build at least Rs.6–8 lakh in 3–4 years.

 
 
 

Then you can take loan for balance amount. EMI will be safer then.

 
 
 

This way, your financial stress remains low.

 
 
 

Should You Wait or Buy Now?
Let’s compare both approaches carefully.

 
 
 

Buy Flat Immediately:

EMI pressure starts immediately. About Rs.30,000–Rs.35,000 per month.

 
 
 

You won’t be able to invest Rs.50,000 monthly anymore.

 
 
 

No funds left for kids’ future or your retirement.

 
 
 

You will be forced to stop current PPF or NPS contributions.

 
 
 

Not a safe approach. Will affect your other goals badly.

 
 
 

Wait and Invest for 5 Years:

Invest Rs.50,000 every month for 5 years.

 
 
 

You can build a down payment corpus of Rs.6–8 lakh easily.

 
 
 

Invest this amount in regular mutual funds with CFP guidance.

 
 
 

You can plan your home buying calmly. With less loan burden.

 
 
 

Your EMI will start only after 5 years. By then income also will grow.

 
 
 

Verdict: Wait and invest. Buy later. More secure path.

 
 
 

About Mutual Funds for SIP
SIP is best way to grow money in a planned way.

 
 
 

You should go for actively managed mutual funds.

 
 
 

Avoid index funds. They just follow index. No protection in falling market.

 
 
 

Actively managed funds try to give higher return than index.

 
 
 

They select good companies using deep research.

 
 
 

Use regular mutual funds through MFD with CFP support.

 
 
 

Avoid direct mutual funds. No help, no monitoring, no personal advice.

 
 
 

Regular funds provide tracking, rebalancing and expert guidance.

 
 
 

For you, regular plans through CFP will reduce risk and improve returns.

 
 
 

Start SIP of Rs.50,000 monthly in 3 to 4 funds.

 
 
 

Mix of large, mid and flexi-cap funds can work well.

 
 
 

Over 5 years, this SIP will help in flat down payment.

 
 
 

After that, you can reduce SIP and start EMI for flat.

 
 
 

Also continue SIP with lower amount for retirement and kids’ goals.

 
 
 

Retirement Planning
You are 36 now. Planning retirement early is smart.

 
 
 

NPS and EPFO are your current retirement tools.

 
 
 

They are safe but not flexible. Returns also moderate.

 
 
 

Mutual funds SIP gives better flexibility and return potential.

 
 
 

You can assign one fund’s SIP fully to your retirement goal.

 
 
 

You need bigger retirement fund. So SIP is needed even after NPS and EPFO.

 
 
 

Don’t rely only on NPS. Add mutual fund SIP to build a proper retirement fund.

 
 
 

Children’s Education and Marriage Planning
Your son is 4. Your daughter is 2. You have 13–16 years for education planning.

 
 
 

Sukanya is good for daughter. But more is needed.

 
 
 

For both kids, education cost will be high.

 
 
 

Start separate SIP for each child’s education.

 
 
 

You can start with Rs.10,000 each per month. Adjust based on your income.

 
 
 

Use separate mutual funds for these goals.

 
 
 

Later, assign some part of PPF maturity also for child marriage.

 
 
 

Avoid child insurance plans. Low return, high cost, and lock-in.

 
 
 

SIP in regular funds gives better flexibility and growth.

 
 
 

Emergency Fund
Emergency fund is must for every family.

 
 
 

Keep at least 6 months’ salary as emergency money.

 
 
 

That is Rs.7.2 lakh in your case.

 
 
 

Use bank savings or liquid mutual funds for this.

 
 
 

Emergency fund is not for investing. Don’t mix it with SIP.

 
 
 

Build this fund slowly over 6–8 months.

 
 
 

Insurance Review
You have RPLI for wife. That is a savings product.

 
 
 

You need pure term insurance. Sum assured of Rs.1 crore is needed.

 
 
 

Premium is low. Life protection is high.

 
 
 

No need for ULIPs or investment-cum-insurance plans.

 
 
 

Also check for proper health insurance for family.

 
 
 

Don’t depend only on office health plan.

 
 
 

Tax Efficiency
Your current investments give good tax benefits.

 
 
 

PPF, Sukanya, NPS all have tax benefits.

 
 
 

EPFO also gives tax-free interest.

 
 
 

Mutual funds have long-term tax advantages too.

 
 
 

LTCG above Rs.1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.

 
 
 

STCG taxed at 20%. Still better than FD or RD taxation.

 
 
 

Mutual funds help in better tax planning in long term.

 
 
 

What You Can Do Now – Step-by-Step
Start SIP of Rs.50,000 monthly in 3–4 mutual funds.

 
 
 

Take help from CFP for selecting right funds.

 
 
 

Review current RPLI. Keep only if not affecting liquidity.

 
 
 

Buy term life cover of Rs.1 crore immediately.

 
 
 

Start emergency fund. Target Rs.7.2 lakh over 1 year.

 
 
 

Start planning for home buying after 4–5 years.

 
 
 

Rebalance your investments every year with your CFP.

 
 
 

Track progress of each goal separately.

 
 
 

Don’t take any loan now. Wait until you are ready.

 
 
 

Finally
You have done a good job with disciplined savings.

 
 
 

But now, you need to shift from saving to smart investing.

 
 
 

Mutual funds with CFP guidance will take your goals forward.

 
 
 

Avoid direct funds and index funds. Use active regular funds.

 
 
 

Delay home buying. Build your down payment through SIP first.

 
 
 

Continue PPF, NPS and Sukanya. But add mutual fund SIP for higher growth.

 
 
 

Keep insurance pure and simple. No ULIPs or endowment plans.

 
 
 

Follow this roadmap. All your goals can be met peacefully.

 
 
 

Best Regards,
 
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
 
Chief Financial Planner,
 
www.holisticinvestment.in
 
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

Ans: 01. You should consult an Advocate for this purpose.
02. In my personal opinion, You should write to the concerned Banks (Speed Post or letter acknowledged by bank), expressing your intention to clear your liability & explaining your position & requesting them some time to take care of your liability towards bank.
03. If they don't co-operate with you, write/tell them to file a case against you, instead of creating non-sense, when you are suffering from a life threatening disease. This is a civil case & not a criminal case & I feel you would be getting reasonable time, while the case is processed.
However, an Advocate's opinion in such matters is a better option for future course of action.
In the mean while, please don;t panic but concentrate on your treatment. In such cases, court has the jurisdiction to decide and that takes time normally (which you require).
Wish you all the best & speedy recovery. Most welcome for any further clarifications. Thanks.

Ans: Let me help you build a well-rounded financial strategy for your goals and responsibilities.

As a Certified Financial Planner, I will provide a detailed and practical review of your situation.

Let’s assess it in different aspects.

 
 
 

Income and Savings Evaluation
Your monthly income of Rs.1 lakh is a strong base.

 
 
 

Monthly RD of Rs.35,000 shows strong saving discipline.

 
 
 

PLI of Rs.20 lakh is a traditional savings policy. Maturity is far in 2038.

 
 
 

Other savings of Rs.2 lakh are useful for short-term needs.

 
 
 

Contributions in Sukanya Samriddhi and SBI Smart Scholar for your kids is a good step.

 
 
 

Currently, you have no loans. That’s a positive financial position.

 
 
 

Now, let’s understand how to better structure everything for long-term results.

 
 
 

About PLI – Postal Life Insurance
PLI is a low-return product, around 5-6% interest per year.

 
 
 

This return may not beat long-term inflation.

 
 
 

But since you already have it, and maturity is in 2038, it can be kept.

 
 
 

You may not need to surrender it now. Treat it as a conservative part of your portfolio.

 
 
 

About RD – Recurring Deposit
RD gives fixed returns. Returns are usually 6 to 7%.

 
 
 

It is useful for short-term savings. Not for long-term growth.

 
 
 

You are investing Rs.35,000 monthly in RD. That’s 35% of income.

 
 
 

Consider if you will need that much liquidity. Or can you invest for growth?

 
 
 

You may reduce RD slowly and divert part of it into higher return products.

 
 
 

About Your Children’s Plans
Sukanya Samriddhi is a good option. It is safe and gives tax-free returns.

 
 
 

Keep investing in it till your daughters reach 14 years of age.

 
 
 

SBI Smart Scholar is an insurance-linked plan. These often have high costs.

 
 
 

If already running, you may continue if surrender leads to loss.

 
 
 

But avoid any more insurance-cum-investment policies in future.

 
 
 

Home Purchase Through Loan
Buying a house is a big financial goal. Needs careful planning.

 
 
 

You have no loans now. So you are eligible for a home loan.

 
 
 

Home loan EMI can be around 30-40% of your monthly income.

 
 
 

That means max EMI of Rs.30,000 to Rs.40,000 is safe for your income.

 
 
 

Include property registration, interiors, moving cost in your budget.

 
 
 

Keep Rs.5-7 lakh ready for down payment and expenses.

 
 
 

Don’t break children’s investments for this purpose.

 
 
 

You can continue your RD for this goal. RD maturity will help in down payment.

 
 
 

Awareness About Mutual Funds
You said you are not aware about mutual funds. Let me explain.

 
 
 

Mutual Funds are managed by expert fund managers.

 
 
 

They invest across shares, bonds, etc., based on the scheme type.

 
 
 

Best way to invest is through Regular Funds via MFD with CFP support.

 
 
 

Certified Financial Planner (CFP) gives right guidance based on your needs.

 
 
 

Regular Funds come with advice, handholding, and portfolio review.

 
 
 

Direct funds don’t offer personal advice. You may end up choosing wrong funds.

 
 
 

With Regular Funds, CFP helps you track, rebalance, and stay goal-focused.

 
 
 

For someone not aware of mutual funds, Regular plans with CFP guidance are safer.

 
 
 

Avoid direct funds if you want personalised support and less risk.

 
 
 

Why Not Index Funds or ETFs?
Index Funds just copy the index. No fund manager selection.

 
 
 

They do not protect your investment during market falls.

 
 
 

Actively Managed Funds are better. They try to beat market returns.

 
 
 

Fund manager uses research to select right companies.

 
 
 

That gives higher chance of long-term growth.

 
 
 

For your profile, actively managed funds with CFP advice are more suitable.

 
 
 

Insurance-Linked Plans and ULIPs
Many people mix insurance and investment. That leads to poor returns.

 
 
 

If you have any ULIP or endowment plans, better to surrender early.

 
 
 

Reinvest that money in mutual funds through a CFP.

 
 
 

Buy simple term insurance separately for life protection.

 
 
 

This keeps your insurance cost low and investment more effective.

 
 
 

Emergency Fund and Liquidity
Keep at least 6 months' income as emergency fund.

 
 
 

That’s around Rs.6 lakh in your case.

 
 
 

You already have Rs.2 lakh. You can add more over time.

 
 
 

Emergency fund can be in liquid mutual funds or bank savings.

 
 
 

Don’t use RD or kids’ savings for this.

 
 
 

Term Insurance and Health Cover
You need term insurance if you don’t already have.

 
 
 

Sum assured should be at least Rs.1 crore at your age.

 
 
 

Premium will be very low if taken early.

 
 
 

Don’t mix insurance with investment.

 
 
 

Also check for health insurance for entire family.

 
 
 

Medical costs are rising. Health cover avoids financial shocks.

 
 
 

Children’s Higher Education Planning
Both your kids need future planning for education.

 
 
 

Sukanya is for girl child and is good for long-term.

 
 
 

But also invest in mutual funds through SIP for both children.

 
 
 

Long-term equity mutual funds give better growth for 10+ year goals.

 
 
 

Use actively managed funds, with help of a CFP.

 
 
 

Plan separately for education and marriage.

 
 
 

Start small SIP now and increase over time.

 
 
 

Tax Efficiency
RDs are taxable as per your income slab.

 
 
 

PLI gives tax-free maturity. So it’s useful from tax angle.

 
 
 

Sukanya is also fully tax-free. Use the full limit if possible.

 
 
 

Mutual funds are more tax efficient than RDs.

 
 
 

Equity mutual funds have 12.5% tax on LTCG above Rs.1.25 lakh.

 
 
 

Short-term gains are taxed at 20%.

 
 
 

Debt mutual funds are taxed as per your tax slab.

 
 
 

But overall, mutual funds help in managing taxation better than RDs or ULIPs.

 
 
 

Step-by-Step Action Plan
Start SIP in mutual funds for long-term goals with CFP support.

 
 
 

Review existing insurance-linked investments. Exit if costly or underperforming.

 
 
 

Maintain emergency fund separately from investment.

 
 
 

Buy term life and family health insurance immediately.

 
 
 

Use RDs for short-term goals like home down payment.

 
 
 

Postpone home purchase if savings are not yet enough.

 
 
 

Track monthly budget to free up more for investments.

 
 
 

Avoid direct mutual funds and index funds.

 
 
 

Focus on customised regular funds guided by CFP.

 
 
 

Plan goals separately for retirement, children, and home.

 
 
 

Do annual reviews of your financial plan with your CFP.

 
 
 

Final Insights
Your savings habits are good. You have no debt. That’s a strong start.

 
 
 

You are serious about family goals. Appreciate your clarity.

 
 
 

But to grow faster, you need better investment choices.

 
 
 

Mutual funds with CFP guidance offer balance of growth and safety.

 
 
 

Avoid direct and passive funds. Stay with actively managed regular plans.

 
 
 

Use insurance only for protection. Not for investing.

 
 
 

Plan every goal step-by-step and review progress yearly.

 
 
 

You are on the right path. You just need expert guidance from here on.

 
 
 

Best Regards,
 
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
 
Chief Financial Planner,
 
www.holisticinvestment.in
 
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment