Dear LG,
My hubby is squeamish about being orally intimate.
How can I change his view?
Thanks,
Jannu Sinha

Ans:

How about that... The problem is usually the other way around!

Not that I’m judging you, my dear, it’s your body and your life to do as you please.

And yes, I can see your point of view.

So why does he want to wait for marriage, particularly? Is he a virgin? It’s a matter of ethics, maybe? Or he just needs a little time to warm up to the idea.

You can tell him that you are only willing to marry him once you’re assured that both of you are physically compatible as well, if that’s how you feel.

One thing I will tell you, though -- do not marry in a hurry for this reason.

Sex is not a reason to marry soon at all. One year of dating, in my opinion, is nowhere enough.

Also, I hope you’ve considered whether you’re be okay to sleep with him even if things  break off in the future?

That is something you should be prepared for, if you’re having sex outside of marriage -- that the marriage may not happen at all. If you’re fine with that, then go right ahead.

Ans: Well if you feel like that, why don’t you make the first move instead of constantly waiting for him to? Give him a kiss on the lips, and see where it leads.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
There's obviously an issue when it comes to sexual intimacy. But when you are very strictly focused on something not happening, it becomes stress and sexual intimacy in stress never happens.
If there is no medical issue, then it's purely about indulging in a lot of foreplay, a lot emotional bonding and most importantly learn to laugh a lot together. This releases a lot of strain and stress if any from both of you as a couple which in turn will help in intimacy.
If this still doesn't work, do get a medical opinion on any possible reasons that maybe preventing either of you from enjoying the process.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
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