Hi, Iam 42 and married for last 12 years with two kids. Due to the scuffles between us my wife left me with kids and have been living away for last 4 years. During this time, a girl of, 15 years younger to me, came in my life and I found a true soul mate in her, may be due to the void which was created because of my wife leaving me. Last year that girl got married to someone else, as she has already planned and conveyed to me right in the beginning of our relationship. In, last one year, my wife is also trying to come close to me, as I have been bearing all their expenses and have been trying to be a good and reasonable father and husband (though I myself is pretty lonely, after my girl's departure) and my wife and kids are now finding me to be a great and responsible man. But me, at the deep down level, is drowning every single day and finding it unbearable to live without my girl. Do not know what to do. That girl is living happily with her husband and planning for the kids. At the same time, she on and off calls me and ask for the monetary favours, which I have been fulfilling even after her marriage. Iam broken and helpless. Kindly help.

Ans: You have a chance of getting ECE/IT and possibly CSE in semi-govt and good private colleges within your budget.

Good luck.
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Radheshyam

Ans: Chances are higher with private pharmacy colleges, but chances in government colleges are very low.

Good luck.
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Radheshyam

Ans: Chances are slim or moderate with CSE @ top colleges, either in Govt or Private. However, you may still have chances in newer or lower-ranked NITs/IIITs in branches other than CSE. If really interested in CSE, try with private colleges for sure admission.

Good luck.
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Radheshyam

Ans: Hello Krish,
The important thing to remember is that flying itself remains one of the safest modes of travel, and your anxiety, while very real, is more about perception than actual risk.
When you notice anxiety rising before or during a flight, try focusing on your breathing first. A simple technique is the 4–7–8 method: inhale through your nose for 4 counts, hold for 7 counts, and exhale slowly through your mouth for 8 counts. This helps calm the body’s stress response. Pairing this with progressive muscle relaxation — gently tensing and releasing muscles from your feet upwards — can give your mind something to focus on and reduce the physical tension that comes with anxiety.
Visualization also works well. Before your flight, close your eyes and imagine yourself boarding calmly, settling into your seat, and landing smoothly at your destination. During the flight, picture a safe, steady path in the sky, like a road, reminding yourself that turbulence is just like bumps on that road — uncomfortable, but not dangerous.
Practical steps help too. Limit caffeine or heavy news consumption before you fly, carry calming music, podcasts, or even guided meditations on your phone, and try to keep your mind occupied with a book, work, or even puzzles. Some people find comfort in talking briefly to flight attendants — their calm and routine presence can be reassuring.
If your anxiety feels overwhelming or keeps getting worse despite these methods, it may help to work with a therapist trained in cognitive-behavioral techniques for phobias. Even a few focused sessions can equip you with tools to manage the fear more effectively.

Ans: Since your son is in Mechanical Engineering, moving into Mechatronics, Robotics, or even Computer-related fields is a natural progression. Some of the best universities abroad for these areas are:
• USA: Carnegie Mellon, MIT, Georgia Tech
• Germany: TU Munich, RWTH Aachen
• Singapore: NUS, NTU
• UK: Imperial College London, University of Edinburgh
For scholarships, he should target Germany and Singapore (government-funded options are strong there), and in the USA/Canada, look at research assistantships or merit-based awards.

Ans: You have a chance for B.Tech IT at Jalpaiguri Govt. Engg. College, and as an alternative, you can target Kalyani Govt. Engg. College or Cooch Behar Govt. Engg. College under WBJEE.

Good luck.
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Radheshyam

Ans: Prefer the CSE-AI branch if he is interested in CSE with specialization, else go with CSE without any hesitation.

Good luck.
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Radheshyam

Ans: Prefer CSE @ VIT Vellore unless your son is very keen on the Bangalore lifestyle and the specialized curriculum. If location and money are not concerns, VIT Vellore is the safer and stronger choice overall because of its national reputation, proven placement record, and alumni network, which carry more long-term weight for jobs and higher studies. BMSCE Bengaluru is a good option if your son strongly prefers living in a big tech hub like Bangalore and wants a slightly broader specialization (IoT + Blockchain + Cyber Security), but the brand value and placement reach are still higher at VIT. Recommending visiting the BMS campus to know more details and placement records in detail. Sometimes, the view changes by personal visit rather than taking a decision on remote counseling or suggestions. After all, your son has to spend 4-5 years on the campus. Hence, it is necessary to take some pains. The final decision will be yours.

Good luck.
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Radheshyam

Ans: You have taken very good steps already with SIP and FD. Your intent to own a house and at the same time secure your family’s future is appreciable. With proper planning you can handle a home loan and also balance other goals. Let us look at your situation from a 360-degree perspective.

» Current income and expenses
– Your monthly income is Rs 60,000.
– Existing commitments are Rs 2,500 LIC and Rs 3,500 SIP.
– That means Rs 6,000 is already going into savings.
– You still have Rs 54,000 left for household expenses, EMI, and other savings.
– This gives you capacity to plan EMI if done carefully.

» LIC policy assessment
– LIC investment is small but not effective for wealth creation.
– Traditional LIC plans give low returns, sometimes lower than inflation.
– Since you are in second year only, surrendering and reinvesting is better.
– The amount can be moved to mutual funds for higher growth.
– Protection should be taken separately through pure term insurance.

» SIP and FD assessment
– Current SIP of Rs 3,500 is a good start.
– At your age and goals, SIP amount needs to be increased.
– FD of Rs 2 lakh is good for emergency buffer.
– But FD is not suitable for long-term wealth creation.
– You must maintain part for emergencies but shift extra to mutual funds.

» Home loan affordability
– A safe EMI limit is 30 to 35% of income.
– For you, that is around Rs 18,000 to Rs 21,000 per month.
– If EMI goes much higher, family cash flow will suffer.
– You need to balance EMI with child’s future and retirement.
– A 20 to 25-year loan is possible but keep EMI affordable.

» Risk of higher EMI burden
– Higher EMI blocks your monthly income.
– It reduces ability to invest for child education and retirement.
– If income rises steadily, EMI burden becomes manageable.
– But depending only on future salary growth is risky.
– Always choose EMI that you can pay even in tough times.

» Emergency fund before loan
– Emergency fund is vital before taking a home loan.
– It should cover at least 6 months of expenses including EMI.
– Your FD of Rs 2 lakh is not enough.
– Build this reserve before committing to loan.
– It will give confidence and safety during emergencies.

» Insurance protection
– Home loan adds large liability to your family.
– You must have adequate life insurance through pure term policy.
– This ensures family can repay loan if something happens to you.
– Health insurance is also very important.
– These covers reduce stress when EMI is running.

» Child education planning
– Your child is in 8th class.
– Within 4 to 5 years, higher education cost will start.
– This is a high priority goal along with home.
– Education cost inflation is very high.
– You must allocate SIP for this goal separately.

» Retirement planning
– You are 42 now and have about 18 years to retire.
– Retirement corpus needs long-term disciplined investing.
– Many people ignore retirement while paying EMI.
– If you delay, you may face shortage later.
– Even small SIPs now can grow large in long term.

» Role of equity mutual funds
– Equity mutual funds create wealth for long-term goals.
– They help fight inflation and build retirement corpus.
– Active funds give professional management and growth opportunity.
– Index funds cannot protect during market falls.
– Actively managed funds have better risk management for your goals.

» Debt mutual funds for balance
– Debt funds provide stability in portfolio.
– They are useful for near-term goals like child’s higher studies.
– They are also good for systematic transfers into equity funds.
– Gains are taxed as per income slab, but stability matters more.
– Balancing debt and equity avoids excess volatility.

» Regular vs direct funds
– Direct funds seem cheaper but they lack guidance.
– With direct funds, you miss the support of Certified Financial Planner.
– Mistakes in timing or allocation may ruin your goals.
– Regular funds with CFP monitoring ensure disciplined strategy.
– The small cost difference is worth the expert advice and reviews.

» Balancing EMI and investments
– Do not commit entire surplus to EMI.
– Keep part of surplus for SIPs in mutual funds.
– This balances house goal with education and retirement goals.
– House is important but should not block your other future needs.
– Balanced approach reduces financial stress later.

» Systematic plan for you
– Keep emergency fund of at least 6 months expenses.
– Maintain affordable EMI within 30% of salary.
– Take sufficient term insurance to cover loan and family needs.
– Increase SIPs gradually for child education and retirement.
– Review portfolio annually with a Certified Financial Planner.

» Psychological balance
– Owning a home gives comfort but EMI brings pressure.
– Proper planning gives peace of mind.
– Splitting resources between EMI, SIP, and insurance balances responsibilities.
– With discipline, you can handle loan and other goals together.
– Confidence grows when you see both home and investments progressing.

» Tax awareness with investments
– Equity fund long term gains above Rs 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%.
– Short term gains taxed at 20%.
– Debt fund gains taxed as per slab.
– Planning redemptions across years can reduce tax impact.
– This will be important when you withdraw for education.

» Importance of yearly review
– Your income, expenses and goals will change with time.
– Loan balance and investments need tracking every year.
– Rebalancing ensures right mix of debt and equity.
– Regular review prevents drift and keeps you on track.
– CFP guidance is essential for this monitoring.

» Currency impact for education
– If your child studies abroad, currency impact will matter.
– Rupee tends to weaken against USD and GBP.
– This increases future cost of overseas education.
– Equity funds can help manage this inflation.
– Some international funds may be considered later for currency hedge.

» Finally
– You can afford a home loan with careful planning.
– Keep EMI around 30% of your income.
– Build emergency fund and take term insurance before loan.
– Surrender LIC and move money to mutual funds.
– Balance EMI with SIPs for child education and retirement.
– Stick to active funds and regular plans with CFP support.
– With discipline and yearly reviews, you can own a house and also secure future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment