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Ravi Mittal |500 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 22, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 21, 2024Hindi

Relationship

Hii i like a girl we have from same community i tried him to connect with him but he didn't respond me but suddenly i get her message and he said i talk with other person now what I can do

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

From what I understand, she might not be interested in connecting with you. It is possible that she is interested in someone else and is already talking to that person. Take the hint and move on. You deserve someone who likes you as much as you like them. And I'm sure you will find that someone soon.

Best Wishes.

RelationshipReply

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Anu Krishna |1437 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 05, 2023

Question by raj - Jun 03, 2023Hindi

Relationship

i am 41 yrs old. i was in love with girl in long distance relationship and we never met but seen three four times only. we were chatting daily and look like a true love but she was school going girls and get closed to his class mate and chatting with him in regular basis due to this her insterest on mine in lost as i am in long distance and another boy is met him daily face to face . what should i have to do ??

Ans: Dear Raj,
Long distance relationships (LDRs in the relationship space) are never easy but not impossible to live by and live through.

Having said this, I do have a doubt here...You mention that she is school going...not to sound judgemental, but she might be under the age of 18. I would urge you to take note of this kindly as it can work against you if any of your chats are seen by anyone else. Let her be a school going girl and go through her life at her age with boys her age. What makes you not look around for women your age? I say this again not to judge you but do become mindful of underage partners...You will have a lot of explaining to do later.
Let her be a girl, let her go through her life's growing years her way...

All the best!

Ravi Mittal |500 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 23, 2024

Question by Prashant - Apr 22, 2024Hindi

Relationship

Im like a girl she is my school friend not a very good friend just friend. Im starting days like her but I don't know that time she likes me or not. So some few years ago I'm back to talk to later and the 2021 last month we can talk much in phone like 3 or 4 hours easily without any specific topic. But I don't know still know she likes me or that are only my overthinking or my illusion....what should I do know stage.... please suggest me

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

It is difficult to tell if a person likes you romantically or just as a friend. There are always 50-50 chances of both. In my opinion, you should subtly ask her the same. Why assume when you can get clarity on the same? Start by telling that you like her more than just a friend. She will have some reaction, and she will also respond to it a certain way depending on how she feels about you. If she sees you as just a friend, I am sure she will let you know. And if she likes you back romantically, she will reveal that too. But I suggest you don't assume and overthink.

Best Wishes.

Shalini Singh |142 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating Coach - Answered on Jun 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 24, 2024Hindi

Relationship

I am a second year student (male), till now in my life i never been i any relationships actually to say i never attracted to anyone, but during the college i met a girl, we started talking, one day while texting she told me that "I heard something I want to ask u.. Something like u likee me?" after that with some fear or i don't know what to say that feeling but I had told her that yes. but then she told we can be only normal friends not to expect more than that. i dont know what to say but i told ok. then even after that we had talk but now a days it reached a point with no replies on chat. i have tried to move on, then suddenly i miss her. as she was my first girl (not even into relationship) that i had some feelings.

Ans: She was nothing but a friend who you may have liked or been attracted to you - it was one way - the sooner you accept this, you will stop missing her. She would have been your 'girl friend' if she reciprocated similar feelings. Hope this helps.

Ravi Mittal |500 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 15, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 14, 2024

Relationship

in Uni. a girl have feelings for me and i also have feelings for him, are feelings are strong, she try to caught my attention for long and i ignore her due to some reasons, than she went in relationship with other guy but still looks at me with hope and gives me green signal, when i purpose and apologize she took one whole day to reply and said no, and block me, and than she gives the mix signal like getting nervous infront of me, than our education program cam to end, and in farewell she show interest, and smile and try to maintain the eye contact which i broke twice, than in farewell she made glimpse on me and when she conform that i am looking at him in farewell she dancing in farewell like nothing matters for him, next day during last exam i am waiting for him outside the exam hall, her friend came and in signal me to move from there, after that we parted because our program have ended, and in confession group i apologize to her and said i will approach her after a year when i sort mu all the issues, but she don't reply instead she start mirroring insta bio, put same things and quote in her bio which i had put despite the fact i said him that i will approach her after a year, and she keep the bio mirroring, i send her following request which she don't accept and keep the bio mirroring, what should i do, I have some disease from which i suffering and i don't want her to suffer with me, but i am also recovering very fast that's why i told her to wait for me for 1 year, so that we start our new journey. WHAT SHOULD I DO WAIT FOR HER

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Either one of two things is happening- you are reading her intentions wrong because so far she has made no verbal confirmation of her interest in you. Or, she is deliberately giving you mixed signals to manipulate you and keep you on the hook. I'd say the first one might be an honest mistake but the second comes very close to a toxic trait. I'd suggest you to be careful in dealing with this person. If she does not directly admit that she is interested in you, do not approach her. Consider her blocking and rejecting you as a final NO, even if it might not be so. Do the right thing, even if she isn't.

If she likes you, let her approach you. If that doesn't happen, focus on moving on. After all, you have not been in a relationship or have deep emotions for her. From what you have said, it seems like you barely know her. You deserve someone who is clear about their feelings for you.
Best Wishes.

Latest Questions

Nayagam P P |4047 Answers |Ask -Follow

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi

Career

This is my second attempt at SSC CGL, and I’ve improved since last year. But I’m still anxious about the descriptive paper. Can you suggest ways to stand out in this section and make my essay and letter writing more impactful?

Ans: The SSC CGL descriptive paper requires a clear, structured, and effective presentation. To improve your essay writing skills, review the subject matter thoroughly and avoid deviations from the central theme. Sketch an initial outline and adhere to a straightforward framework, including an Introduction, Body, and Conclusion. Start with a hook and express your thesis or stance in a concise manner. Arrange arguments in a logical order, using data, examples, and facts to establish credibility. Avoid repetition and maintain brevity.

In summary, concisely summarize the primary themes and offer a fair perspective. Avoid vernacular language and maintain appropriate sentence structure and grammar. Maintain a clean writing style and avoid overwriting.

For writing a letter, adhere to the conventional format, maintain clarity and conciseness, and articulate the purpose in the first paragraph. Use simple language and avoid intricate terminology.

Regularly engage in writing essays and correspondence on various subjects to develop adaptability. Stay informed about the latest news and hot topics. Develop time management skills and consistently proofread your work for errors.

Developing impactful essays and letters with clarity, structure, and content relevance enhances your chances of success in the SSC CGL descriptive paper. All The Best for Your Prosperous Future.

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Nayagam P P |4047 Answers |Ask -Follow

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 15, 2025Hindi

Career

Mr Nayagam, how to check All India Bar Exam (AIBE) result?

Ans: Please visit All India Bar Examination Website and check your result by logging into it with your Roll Number & DOB. All The Best for Your Prosperous Future.

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Kanchan Rai |493 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 05, 2025Hindi

Relationship

How to manage stress?

Ans: The first step is to become aware of what triggers your stress. This self-awareness allows you to address the root causes rather than just the symptoms. Once you identify these triggers, you can start exploring techniques that help you cope effectively.

One effective approach is to incorporate regular self-care practices into your daily routine. This could include activities that bring you joy and relaxation, such as exercise, meditation, or spending time in nature. These practices not only help calm the mind but also improve your overall mood and resilience to stress.

Talking to someone you trust, whether a friend, family member, or professional, can also be a powerful way to manage stress. Sharing your feelings and experiences helps lighten the emotional load and provides different perspectives that might help you navigate your challenges more effectively.

It's also important to focus on what you can control and let go of things that are beyond your influence. This shift in mindset can reduce feelings of helplessness and frustration. Setting realistic expectations for yourself and others can also alleviate unnecessary pressure.

Remember to give yourself permission to rest and recharge. Adequate sleep, a balanced diet, and time for relaxation are essential for managing stress. When you take care of your body and mind, you're better equipped to handle life's demands.

Lastly, cultivating a mindset of gratitude and mindfulness can help you stay present and appreciate the positive aspects of your life, even during stressful times. These practices can create a sense of balance and help you respond to stress in healthier, more constructive ways. By integrating these approaches into your life, you can build resilience and find a sense of peace amidst the chaos.

Kanchan Rai |493 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi

Relationship

Dear Counselor, My husband and I have been together for 11 years, with 10 years of dating and 1 year of marriage. Unfortunately, our relationship has been strained over the past year due to financial disagreements. Before marriage, we discussed his personal loan, which was taken for a land purchase for his mother. The loan repayment amounts to 30% of his salary. He assured me that, except for this loan repayment, he would not contribute financially to his parents' expenses until the loan was paid off. However, his parents are now pressuring him to increase his financial support by 20%. They claim to need help clearing their debts, despite being below 45, physically fit, and earning a sufficient income to support themselves. This situation is causing tension in our marriage, as we had planned to save and invest together, having no property or financial security of our own. I'm finding it challenging to understand why my husband is not prioritizing our financial goals and future together. please help me on this. Thank you for your time and guidance.

Ans: The key here is to approach the situation with empathy and open communication. Your husband likely feels a strong sense of duty towards his parents, which is understandable given cultural and familial expectations. However, it’s also important for him to recognize the commitments and plans you’ve both made as a couple. Balancing these two responsibilities can be difficult, but it’s essential for the health of your relationship.

Start by having a calm and honest conversation with your husband. Express your feelings without blame, focusing on how the situation affects both of you and your shared goals. It’s important that he understands your perspective and how the financial strain is impacting not only your plans but also your emotional well-being.

Encourage him to discuss his feelings and the pressure he’s experiencing from his parents. Sometimes, partners may feel caught between their familial obligations and their commitments to their spouse, leading to stress and internal conflict. Understanding his point of view can help you find common ground.

You might also explore practical solutions together, such as setting clear boundaries on financial support or finding a compromise that allows both your goals and his familial obligations to be met to some extent. This could involve budgeting, setting financial priorities, or seeking financial counseling to help manage the situation more effectively.

Ultimately, it’s about finding a balance that respects both of your needs and ensures that your marriage remains a priority. By working together and communicating openly, you can navigate this challenge and strengthen your relationship.

Kanchan Rai |493 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi

Relationship

Hi Mam, I met my ex wife in the college where we both were pursuing out studies. We exchanged contacts and started speaking over phone like couple does. When we fall in live we ourselves don't know as no one propose to each other. As i finished my studies, she quit studies in the middle and decided to do hotel management course. Amd it so happened, next day her interview was lined up but unfortunately due to unavoidable circumstances she has to go to her native place. As Covid struck she git stuck in her native place and couldn't come back. And when everything became normal i insisted her to come but her mom was not allowing. After a lot of struggle her mom allowed her and she came back. In this course of time both families was aware about our relationship. My mom was against her because of 2 reasons, 1) Intercaste 2) She was from very poor and low caste background. Them too i continued the relationship and i convinced to my sister and she convinced to mom. And when she was in native place, she said once that her voice has gone has gone she need 50k for operation. I trying madly to arrange funds and one of my friend told me that she is playing with you be careful but as i was blind in love i necer listened him. When she came to Mumbai i arranged a pg accommodation for her for some time and i use to take her out for dinner as there use to be regular fights with owner. Somehow i convinced my mom and shifted her to my place. There use to be fights but we use to care for each other also at the same time. She started to do events and slowly and steadily started to work in media. She was well aware that i dont like girls working media then too i have her permission to work in media temporary. I went against everyone, my family and friend and after 7yrs of relationship we decided to get marry and it was working fine. After marriage fight increased and she used to taunt though i did so much for her. Once she was not well and as she used to taunt me i never took care of her. One day my dear friend told me to check her phone, she might be seeing someone. And when i checked she was having an affair with Assistant director, i saw msgs photos. And when i confronted she said "He is just a friend and we talk normally" I saw they both on one bed and when i forward their pics to her mom she said "There might be some problem in you only." And when i asked to my ex wife about all this she said "A person goes where he or she gets love and care" All this happened within 6-8 months of our marriage. When i came to know about all this i tod her to leave my house and she was asking for divorce because of my mon's behavior also. I think i should have not tell her to leave as when she left i don't know but i love her very much. I even told her to give me one chance as i gave her but she didn't stopped talking with her bf. And she didn't gave me a chance and went away. We have been legally divorced but still i love her and ready to accept her. But she doesn't want to come back. I am trying to forget her but couldn't. Luckily we don't have kids. Sometimes my heart says let her go she cheated you. Sometimes it says i love now also. I am struggling to forgot her as i am in contact now also. Please suggest. Thank you

Ans: it's important to acknowledge and honor the love you felt and still feel. Love doesn’t simply disappear overnight, and it’s natural to have lingering emotions, especially when you’ve shared so much history and effort to keep the relationship going. However, it’s also crucial to recognize the harm and hurt caused by her actions and the unresolved issues that led to the breakdown of your marriage.

The fact that she chose not to return and continues to maintain contact with the person she was involved with suggests that she has moved on emotionally, even if you haven’t. Holding onto hope for reconciliation can keep you trapped in a cycle of pain and longing, which makes it harder to heal and move forward.

Your heart and mind are sending you mixed signals because you’re torn between the love you still feel and the reality of the betrayal. This is a common struggle after a significant loss, but it’s important to focus on what’s best for your emotional well-being. Continuing to be in contact with her may be preventing you from healing fully. It might be beneficial to create some distance, at least temporarily, to allow yourself the space to process your feelings and begin the healing process.

Focusing on yourself and your own growth is essential. Consider engaging in activities that bring you joy, spending time with supportive friends and family, and possibly seeking professional counseling to help you work through your emotions and develop strategies to move forward.

Letting go is difficult, especially when you still have love for someone, but it’s a crucial step towards healing. Accepting that the relationship has ended and focusing on your future can help you find peace and eventually open the door to new possibilities for love and happiness.

Asked on - Jan 15, 2025 | Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Thank you very much for ur reply. But i am finding difficult to forget her.

Ans: It might be helpful to focus on the following steps to move forward:

Acceptance: Accept that the relationship has ended and that continuing to hold on to it may be preventing you from healing. Acceptance doesn’t mean you have to stop loving her immediately, but it does mean recognizing that the relationship is no longer viable.
Self-Care: Prioritize your emotional well-being by engaging in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who can help you through this process. Consider exploring new hobbies or interests that can redirect your focus and bring positive energy into your life.
Boundaries: It might be time to set boundaries with your ex-wife, especially if staying in contact is causing you more pain. Taking a step back from communication can provide the space you need to heal and gain clarity.
Professional Support: Consider speaking with a therapist or counselor who can help you process your feelings and guide you through the healing journey. Professional support can offer valuable tools and strategies to navigate the complex emotions you’re experiencing.
Remember, healing takes time, and it’s okay to grieve the loss of the relationship. With patience and self-compassion, you can move forward, find peace, and eventually open yourself up to new possibilities and happiness in life.

Nayagam P P |4047 Answers |Ask -Follow

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 15, 2025Hindi

Career

Sir, is it difficult to crack the All India Bar Exam? My son is in class 11 arts. He is interested in law and wants to work in the public sector. What is the eligibility for AIBE? Does it happen twice a year? What are some of the entrance exams he should be preparing for?

Ans: The All India Bar Examination (AIBE) is a compulsory (moderate difficulty) test for law graduates to obtain the Certificate of Practice (COP) required to practice law in India. It is conducted twice a year by the Bar Council of India and focuses on core law subjects like Constitutional Law, IPC, CPC, CrPC, and professional ethics. Key law entrance exams include the Common Law Admission Test (CLAT), All India Law Entrance Test (AILET), LSAT India, and Symbiosis Law Admission Test (SLAT). Preparation for AIBE involves practicing current affairs, participating in debates, MUNs, and public speaking, and considering coaching for CLAT in Class 12. All The Best for Your Prosperous Future. Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on ' Careers | Health | Money | Relationship'. All The Best for Your Son's Prosperous Future. Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on ' Careers | Health | Money | Relationship'.

Kanchan Rai |493 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 13, 2025Hindi

Relationship

My partner and I are from different cultural backgrounds. She has always felt a strong spiritual connection to events like the Kumbh Mela. Earlier this year, while booking the tickets she had asked if I would like to join her as she is travelling solo. While I respect her beliefs, I refused to join because I am not a religious person. Now that she has booked her tickets, I am worried about her safety. Should I tell her to cancel her trip? I don't want her to think that I am disrespecting her choices or religion. Or should I just tag along and make her feel safe? How do I address these concerns and have a healthy conversation?

Ans: Start by having an honest conversation with her. Share your feelings about her safety in a caring and non-confrontational way. Let her know that your concern comes from a place of love and care, not from a lack of respect for her spiritual journey. It’s important to express that you understand her desire to attend the Kumbh Mela and that you support her connection to this event.

If you’re considering joining her, it could be a gesture of solidarity and support, even if you’re not personally invested in the spiritual aspect. However, it’s crucial to approach this as a way to share the experience together and ensure her safety, rather than as an obligation or with reluctance. If you decide to join her, communicate that you’re doing so because you want to be there for her, which could strengthen your relationship.

On the other hand, if you feel strongly about not attending due to personal beliefs, you can suggest other ways to support her. This might include discussing safety plans or staying in close communication while she’s there. This approach shows that you trust her decisions while still being there for her in a supportive way.

Ultimately, the conversation should aim to understand each other’s perspectives and find a solution that makes both of you feel comfortable and respected. Balancing your care for her safety with respect for her independence and beliefs is key to maintaining a healthy, supportive relationship.

Kanchan Rai |493 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 09, 2025Hindi

Relationship

I am 42 Female currently, last marriage didn't go well, afraid of new start, I neither type of person who can go to club etc etc to "find someone" - What's the best way to move forward, Do we have genuine way of finding someone who can become reliable partner too (No tinder etc as again I knw myself now at this age, I can't) - Please guide

Ans: One of the best ways to meet someone compatible is through shared interests and environments where you feel at ease. Consider engaging in activities or communities that resonate with you. This could include joining local interest groups, volunteering, or taking classes in areas you’re passionate about. These settings not only provide opportunities to meet like-minded individuals but also allow connections to develop organically over shared experiences and values.

Another valuable approach is to lean on your existing network. Friends, family, and colleagues often know you well and can introduce you to others who might be a good match. These introductions can be more comfortable and trustworthy since they come from people who understand your personality and values.

It’s also important to give yourself time and space to heal and grow from past experiences. Building a reliable and meaningful relationship starts with being in a place where you feel confident and whole on your own. This self-awareness and emotional readiness will naturally attract the right kind of partner who values and respects you for who you are.

Remember, there’s no rush or specific timeline you need to adhere to. Allow relationships to develop at a pace that feels right for you, and focus on building connections that are based on mutual respect, understanding, and shared values. Trust that the right person will come into your life when the time is right, and until then, prioritize your own happiness and well-being.

Kanchan Rai |493 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Question by Dinesh - Oct 09, 2024Hindi

Relationship

My age is 48 years and i have one son aged 17 years and i am single son of my parents ,one and half year back my wife expired and upon insisted by my parents and close relatives i got remarried and she has one girl aged 8 years, after passing of six months she has started showing her true colors and it has become very difficult for me to continue and i want to get rid of this . Please guide me what should i do now.

Ans: Dear Dinesh,
it’s important to reflect on what is making the relationship difficult. Understanding the specific issues—whether they stem from differences in values, communication problems, or other conflicts—can provide clarity on how to move forward.

If you haven't already, consider having an open and honest conversation with your wife about your concerns. Sometimes, addressing issues directly can lead to resolutions or at least a better understanding of each other's perspectives. Counseling, either individually or as a couple, can also be a valuable tool in navigating these challenges and deciding the best course of action.

However, if you’ve already tried addressing these issues and find that the relationship is still untenable, it may be time to consider ending the marriage. It’s important to prioritize your emotional and mental well-being, as well as that of your son and stepdaughter. Divorce is never an easy decision, especially when children are involved, but staying in an unhappy and unhealthy relationship can have long-term negative impacts on everyone.

As you contemplate your next steps, it’s also important to lean on your support system. Friends, family, or a counselor can provide guidance and help you navigate this difficult period. Remember, prioritizing your well-being is not only crucial for you but also for your children, as they look to you for stability and emotional guidance. Making decisions that lead to a healthier and happier environment for everyone involved is ultimately the most important goal.

Kanchan Rai |493 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 08, 2024

Relationship

Hello mam.I know a girl since college days.She is married to a guy since last 15 years.Since last 3 years we had an affair.I did take her for granted after our 2 nd half 3 years of relationship.Since a year now she has been giving me some or the other reason such as she is not getting feeling for me,husband is taking much care now so cant handle our relationship,then she told she has some health issue and now recently she tells me she has been telling me indirectly since a year to move on as she was in a relationship with some guy whom she got attracted in a mutual connection.But now she has discontinued with him as well. We do chat on message and call sometime but now since a year she herself has stopped calling or messaging.She replies only when i message or call. I want her back in my life and improve my relationship with her.Please guide me to get her back and have a relationship with her as we had till last year.What steps should I take to win her heart back and make her mine?

Ans: The first step is to acknowledge and respect her current feelings and boundaries. It’s clear she’s navigating her own emotional journey and trying to find clarity in her life. Pressuring her or trying to win her back without considering her current stance may push her further away.

Instead, focus on open and honest communication. If you genuinely care for her, it’s important to express your feelings without being demanding. Share how you feel, but also be willing to listen to her perspective fully. Understand that love and relationships are mutual, and both parties need to feel connected and invested.

During this time, it’s also essential to reflect on your own needs and emotional well-being. Ask yourself if this relationship, as it currently stands, is fulfilling and healthy for you. Relationships can be complicated, and sometimes stepping back to allow both people space to understand their feelings can lead to a clearer path forward, whether that’s together or apart.

Ultimately, your focus should be on building healthy, honest connections and prioritizing emotional well-being for both yourself and the people involved. If there’s a possibility of rekindling the relationship, it will come from mutual understanding, respect, and willingness from both sides.

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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