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Anu

Anu Krishna  |839 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 05, 2022

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
MS Question by MS on Aug 05, 2022Hindi
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Relationship

Hello Anu. I hope you are doing well. I follow your column and read your posts.
I have a different issue. I am single and 30+ years. I have no complaints as I did not find any suitable guy to marry. I had a happy and busy life before Covid. However after Covid, lockdown and this work from home life has become monotonous. I not only lost my uncle due to depression but lost my friends due to fights and misunderstanding. I believe in giving importance so I tried to patch up with my friends but they prefer to break all the connections and move on. I have always had a thing for respect and to be valued. I moved away too coz I felt it was the right thing to do but somewhere it hurts me a lot that I am not able to hold on to my friends who knew me for so many years. How can someone get abandoned and not want to talk and sort things out?
I feel I am overthinking it when the others are not even bothered or thinking about me or it. I really want to move away and focus on my life and career. I try doing it but many times there are so many things that reminds me of them and I get stuck and emotional again.
I am trying some meditation and journaling but it does not seem to clear my mind.
Hence I thought of checking with you.
Let me know if you have any advice for me.

Ans:

Dear MS,

Time to make amends?

You clearly seem like someone who likes being around friends and has allowed a bit of ego take over, which has perhaps pushed them away.

So go back to them! Make amends, apologise for what’s happened and tell them how much you value their presence in your life.

Focus on what is good in them and what they bring into your life. No one is perfect; expecting them to behave in a certain manner and letting your pride come in the way will push them away.

Even if you move away from them and make new friends, the same thing will happen again as there is a part of you that expects something they can’t do or be.

It's time to look within and make some subtle and useful changes so that people are attracted to that person in you who is fun and compassionate.

Also, you can continue with journalling and spend time listing down the best qualities in each of your friends.

This will help in celebrating them for who they are and it really makes you feel good from within. It works!

Best wishes!

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |839 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 05, 2022

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Relationship
Hello Anu. I hope you are doing well. I follow your column and read your posts. I have a different issue. I am single and 30+ years. I have no complaints as I did not find any suitable guy to marry. I had a happy and busy life before Covid. However after Covid, lockdown and this work from home life has become monotonous. I not only lost my uncle due to depression but lost my friends due to fights and misunderstanding. I believe in giving importance so I tried to patch up with my friends but they prefer to break all the connections and move on. I have always had a thing for respect and to be valued. I moved away too coz I felt it was the right thing to do but somewhere it hurts me a lot that I am not able to hold on to my friends who knew me for so many years. How can someone get abandoned and not want to talk and sort things out? I feel I am overthinking it when the others are not even bothered or thinking about me or it. I really want to move away and focus on my life and career. I try doing it but many times there are so many things that reminds me of them and I get stuck and emotional again. I am trying some meditation and journaling but it does not seem to clear my mind.Hence I thought of checking with you. Let me know if you have any advice for me.
Ans:

Dear MS,

Time to make amends?

You clearly seem like someone who likes being around friends and has allowed a bit of ego take over, which has perhaps pushed them away.

So go back to them! Make amends, apologise for what’s happened and tell them how much you value their presence in your life.

Focus on what is good in them and what they bring into your life. No one is perfect; expecting them to behave in a certain manner and letting your pride come in the way will push them away.

Even if you move away from them and make new friends, the same thing will happen again as there is a part of you that expects something they can’t do or be.

It's time to look within and make some subtle and useful changes so that people are attracted to that person in you who is fun and compassionate.

Also, you can continue with journalling and spend time listing down the best qualities in each of your friends.

This will help in celebrating them for who they are and it really makes you feel good from within. It works!

Best wishes!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |839 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 05, 2022

Listen
Relationship
Hello Anu. I hope you are doing well. I follow your column and read your posts. I have a different issue. I am single and 30+ years. I have no complaints as I did not find any suitable guy to marry. I had a happy and busy life before Covid. However after Covid, lockdown and this work from home life has become monotonous. I not only lost my uncle due to depression but lost my friends due to fights and misunderstanding. I believe in giving importance so I tried to patch up with my friends but they prefer to break all the connections and move on. I have always had a thing for respect and to be valued. I moved away too coz I felt it was the right thing to do but somewhere it hurts me a lot that I am not able to hold on to my friends who knew me for so many years. How can someone get abandoned and not want to talk and sort things out? I feel I am overthinking it when the others are not even bothered or thinking about me or it. I really want to move away and focus on my life and career. I try doing it but many times there are so many things that reminds me of them and I get stuck and emotional again. I am trying some meditation and journaling but it does not seem to clear my mind.Hence I thought of checking with you. Let me know if you have any advice for me.
Ans:

Dear MS,

Time to make amends?

You clearly seem like someone who likes being around friends and has allowed a bit of ego take over, which has perhaps pushed them away.

So go back to them! Make amends, apologise for what’s happened and tell them how much you value their presence in your life.

Focus on what is good in them and what they bring into your life. No one is perfect; expecting them to behave in a certain manner and letting your pride come in the way will push them away.

Even if you move away from them and make new friends, the same thing will happen again as there is a part of you that expects something they can’t do or be.

It's time to look within and make some subtle and useful changes so that people are attracted to that person in you who is fun and compassionate.

Also, you can continue with journalling and spend time listing down the best qualities in each of your friends.

This will help in celebrating them for who they are and it really makes you feel good from within. It works!

Best wishes!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |839 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 18, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 27, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
I am 42 year old married woman. I was attached to my father very much. I lost him suddenly in 2021 by covid. He was fit and fine. I never thought he could left us like this. I feel very lonely , empty & completely of no desire for anything in life. I feel guilty and bad that the way my father struggled alone in ICU ward in his final days & we could not do anything for him. No one could met him & even saw him. I could not hugged him & even touched his body to say to goodbye in crematorium. Life got completely changed for me now. I am doing a job in which I working for very long time but not getting noticed or promoted so I feel sidelined by my seniors. I feel no use to work there or even anywhere now. I feel mentally I am tired to handle any pressure now. I am thinking to quit it to get some mental peace but not sure what I will do in free time. I have few marriage issues also & don't have any kids. I want to spend time alone & not even with my husband. Now I just want to live my life peacefully & happily without expecting anything from anyone. Tell me if I am correct or need to improve my way of thinking.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am truly very sorry for your loss. It might have been very difficult at not having that closure right at the end to process your loss your way. I can only imagine what you must be going through even now.

This heavy heartedness has most likely caused you to lose interest in many things in life including your work life. Even things that were simple to handle might have become too much to deal with. You need to heal by grieving and slowly going into acceptance. Is this hard? Oh yes, but with the help of someone who specializes in grief counselling and therapy, you can heal through this. This doesn't mean that you have to forget your father; it only means you process what has happened to transition into a better mind space. This will help you get a grip over your life for what it is now and like all of us, you deserve to be happy and at peace. Do consider this option and see an expert; it will really help you...

All the best and do know that this too shall Pass!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |839 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 13, 2023

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Relationship
Hi, Trust you're doing well. I'll begin with a complaint. I'm mentioning it here since there's no other platform to grumble on. My previous mail, not written to you, wasn't replied to. On top of that, my inbox is bombarded with mails with details of crises faced by others. As it is, I'm besieged with problems of my own. I don't really have the stomach to analyse crises faced by others. Coming to my issue, as was somewhat expected, the girl I would go around with has broken all contact with me after I was rude to her. Now the question is, how do I cope with it? I've managed to shrug off the feeling of guilt since she was herself very rude when I tried reaching out to her. However, I'm still missing her. How do I cope with the emptiness? Reading books isn't helping. After all, books don't talk, do they? Books can't really be a substitute to a woman's company. I'm trying to raise my earnings since at 49, I'm at the fag end of my career. Is there any way I can keep myself busy? NGOs don't take in people of my age. What do I do? Please advise. Thank you.
Ans: Dear Kanishka,
What is the point with all the distress? The more you stay in the problem, the bigger it is going to get!
If your relationship is over, then move on...yes, the emptiness takes quite sometime to get over with BUT it is possible to get a grab of your emotions ONLY if you choose to...
Focus on the time being on:
Work
Health
Family
Friends
This will give you an idea as to how much more energy you can drive into each of these to see the results that you want. Obviously, you can put in strategic thought into planning the next 10 years of your professional life. Your career ends only when you want it to end. In this digital age, the world is one big village where there are myriad opportunities. Research a bit on where your skills and experience can add value...
So, the point that I am making here is: Shift focus to the things that can change the course of your life for the better!

All the best!

..Read more

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1649 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 22, 2024Hindi
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Money
My monthly expenditure is around 1.5 lakh now. How much money would I need to retire after 10 years. I have two daughters around 6 and 1 year old
Ans: Planning for retirement is crucial, especially with dependents to consider. Let's break down your retirement needs:

Current Expenses: Your monthly expenditure of 1.5 lakh will likely change over time due to inflation and changing lifestyle needs. It's essential to account for these factors in your retirement planning.
Dependents: Considering your two daughters, you'll need to plan for their education, marriage, and other expenses. These should be factored into your retirement corpus.
Inflation: Over 10 years, inflation can significantly erode purchasing power. Assume an average annual inflation rate to estimate future expenses accurately.
Retirement Corpus: To maintain your current lifestyle, you'll need a retirement corpus that can generate enough income to cover your expenses, factoring in inflation and other financial goals.
Investment Strategy: Determine the rate of return you expect from your investments over the next 10 years. This will impact the size of the corpus you need to accumulate.
Emergency Fund: Set aside an emergency fund equivalent to 6-12 months of expenses to cover unexpected costs during retirement.
Healthcare Costs: As you age, healthcare expenses may increase. Consider these costs in your retirement planning to ensure comprehensive coverage.
After assessing these factors, consult with a Certified Financial Planner to develop a customized retirement plan tailored to your specific needs, goals, and risk tolerance. They can help you determine the required corpus, suitable investment strategies, and retirement income sources to ensure a financially secure retirement for you and your family.

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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1649 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 22, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hi, i started investing 5k monthly on uti nifty 50 index(50percent),motilal oswal midcap 100 index(30percent),nippon india smallcap 250 index(20percent), i am planning to invest for 20years at a step up of 10percent every year, will this be good enough?
Ans: It's commendable that you've started investing for your future. Let's assess your investment strategy:

Investment Mix: Your portfolio comprises index funds tracking different market segments, providing diversification across large, mid, and small-cap stocks.
Long-Term Perspective: Investing for 20 years is a prudent approach, allowing your investments to potentially benefit from the power of compounding and ride out market fluctuations.
Step-Up SIP: Increasing your SIP amount by 10% annually is an excellent strategy to align your investments with your income growth and counteract the impact of inflation.
Risk Management: Index funds offer low-cost exposure to the broader market but may lack the potential for alpha generation compared to actively managed funds. However, they provide consistent returns over the long term.
Review and Rebalance: Periodically review your portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Rebalance if necessary to maintain your desired asset allocation.
Considerations: While index funds offer diversification and low expenses, they may underperform actively managed funds during certain market conditions. However, their simplicity and long-term consistency make them suitable for many investors.
Overall, your investment strategy appears sound, considering your long-term horizon, diversification, and disciplined approach through SIPs. Keep monitoring your portfolio's performance and make adjustments as needed to stay on track with your financial objectives.

Remember, investing is a journey, and staying committed to your plan while adapting to changing circumstances will help you achieve your financial goals over time. Best of luck with your investment journey!

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1649 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 22, 2024Hindi
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Money
What monthly income can I expect with retirement corpus of 1.14 crores. What are your suggested types of investments and subsequent returns in each and hence total accumulated monthly income. Namaskar! -C. Bhakta
Ans: Mr. Bhakta! It's great to hear that you're planning ahead for your retirement. Let's explore your options and potential monthly income from your retirement corpus:
• Retirement Corpus: With a corpus of 1.14 crores, you can generate a monthly income through various investment avenues.
• Types of Investments: Consider a mix of fixed income and equity investments to balance risk and returns.
• Fixed Income Investments: Fixed deposits, bonds, and debt mutual funds offer stable returns with lower risk. You can expect around 6-8% annual returns from these instruments.
• Equity Investments: Equity mutual funds and dividend-paying stocks have the potential for higher returns but come with higher risk. Historically, equity investments have generated average annual returns of 10-12% over the long term.
• Total Accumulated Monthly Income: Assuming a conservative approach with a mix of fixed income and equity investments, your total accumulated monthly income could range from 8,500 to 14,000 rupees per month for every 1 lakh invested.
It's essential to diversify your investments across different asset classes to mitigate risk and maximize returns. Additionally, regularly review your investment portfolio and adjust it based on changing market conditions and your financial goals.
By adopting a disciplined approach to investing and seeking guidance from a certified financial planner, you can build a robust retirement portfolio that provides a steady income stream to support your post-retirement lifestyle.
Best wishes for your retirement planning journey!

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1649 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 22, 2024Hindi
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Money
I am 52yrs old retired from service but have a small time business now. My MF fundvalue as of today is 75lacs. I have gold approx worth 25lacs & LI n Fds which will mature in the next 5 yrs value to another 25lacs.... I have a SIP of 7500/month which i plan to continue for the next 5yrs.....(I have a 2nd home too a 2bhk apartment worth 65lacs) What will be my approx total corpus 5yrs from now ? Am i comfortably placed for retirement post 58 ie 6yrs from now ?
Ans: it's commendable that you've taken proactive steps towards planning your retirement and securing your financial future. Let's assess your current situation and future prospects:
• Current Assets: With a substantial MF portfolio, gold investments, and maturity of LIC policies and FDs in the next 5 years, you've built a diverse asset base.
• Regular Investments: Continuing your SIP of 7500/month demonstrates discipline and commitment towards wealth accumulation, contributing to your financial stability.
• Real Estate Holding: Owning a 2BHK apartment adds to your net worth, providing potential rental income or capital appreciation over time.
• Retirement Readiness: Considering your existing assets and ongoing investments, it's crucial to project your future corpus and assess if it meets your retirement needs.
• Future Financial Planning: To ensure a comfortable retirement, evaluate your expected expenses post-retirement, including healthcare, household, and leisure activities.
• Inflation and Market Dynamics: Account for inflation and market fluctuations while projecting your future corpus to maintain purchasing power and mitigate investment risks.
• Consultation with a Certified Financial Planner: Seek advice from a qualified financial planner to conduct a comprehensive analysis of your retirement goals, risk tolerance, and investment strategy.
• Regular Review and Adjustments: Periodically review your financial plan and make necessary adjustments to stay on track towards achieving your retirement objectives.
In conclusion, while your current financial position appears promising, it's essential to evaluate your retirement readiness holistically and make informed decisions to ensure long-term financial security and peace of mind. With prudent financial planning and diligent execution, you can enhance your retirement preparedness and enjoy a fulfilling post-retirement life.

...Read more

Samraat

Samraat Jadhav  |1727 Answers  |Ask -

Stock Market Expert - Answered on May 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 07, 2024Hindi
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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1649 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 23, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hello I plan to retire in next 4 years. I will be 52 years old at that time. I have 2, 3 BHK houses in Mumbai out of which one is required for our stay and other can be put up for rent which can fetch a monthly rent of 1lakh (today's date). I will get around 1 lakh(in hand as pension) and will have corpus of around 2 Cr at the time of my retirement. I have a daughter who will be fishing her graduation after 4 years. I will need money for her higher education and her marriage (I do not need gold as I already have). I have upper middle class life style at present. My question is will question is will the amount as I described earlier be sufficient for me to retire at an age of 52. I want to retain the present lifestyle.
Ans: Retiring at 52 with a sufficient corpus and a rental income from one of your properties is indeed a significant milestone. Let's assess your situation to determine if your current plan aligns with your retirement goals and lifestyle expectations:
1. Corpus and Income Sources: With a projected corpus of 2 Cr and an additional monthly pension of 1 lakh, you have a substantial financial base to support your retirement. The rental income from your property further adds to your income stream.
2. Expenses and Lifestyle: It's essential to evaluate your expected expenses post-retirement and compare them with your projected income. Since you aim to maintain your upper-middle-class lifestyle, factor in expenses related to healthcare, travel, leisure activities, and any unforeseen emergencies.
3. Daughter's Education and Marriage: Planning for your daughter's higher education and marriage is crucial. Estimate the future costs for these milestones and ensure that you allocate a portion of your corpus towards meeting these expenses. Consider inflation-adjusted estimates for a more accurate assessment.
4. Inflation and Investment Strategy: Given your retirement horizon of 4 years, focus on a balanced investment approach that prioritizes capital preservation while aiming for moderate growth. Consider allocating a portion of your corpus to safer investment avenues such as debt instruments, while also diversifying into equities and real estate for potential growth.
5. Regular Review and Adjustments: Regularly review your financial plan to ensure it remains aligned with your retirement goals and lifestyle aspirations. Make adjustments as necessary based on changes in your income, expenses, and market conditions.
6. Consultation with Financial Planner: Consider seeking advice from a certified financial planner who can provide personalized guidance based on your specific financial situation, retirement goals, and risk tolerance.
In summary, while your current financial situation appears promising for retirement at 52, it's essential to conduct a thorough assessment of your income, expenses, and investment strategy to ensure long-term financial security and fulfillment of your retirement objectives.

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1649 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 08, 2024

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Money
Good mutual fund of uti to invest lum sum
Ans: UTI Mutual Fund offers a range of funds catering to various investment objectives and risk profiles. While I can't recommend specific funds, I can offer some guidance on selecting a suitable UTI Mutual Fund for lump sum investment:
1. Define Your Investment Goals: Determine your investment objectives, time horizon, and risk tolerance before selecting a mutual fund. Different UTI funds cater to growth, income, or balanced objectives.
2. Consider Fund Categories: UTI Mutual Fund offers equity funds, debt funds, hybrid funds, and thematic funds. Choose a fund category that aligns with your investment goals and risk appetite.
3. Assess Performance: Evaluate the historical performance of UTI funds within your chosen category. Look for consistent long-term performance and fund managers with a track record of generating returns in line with your objectives.
4. Expense Ratio: Consider the expense ratio of the fund, which represents the annual fees charged by the fund house. Lower expense ratios can enhance your returns over time.
5. Fund Manager Expertise: Assess the expertise and experience of the fund manager managing the UTI fund you're interested in. A skilled and experienced fund manager can make a significant difference in fund performance.
6. Risk Management: Evaluate the risk management practices of the fund house and the specific fund. Ensure that the fund's risk profile aligns with your risk tolerance and investment horizon.
7. Diversification: Consider diversifying your investment across different UTI funds or asset classes to spread risk and optimize returns.
8. Read Scheme Documents: Review the scheme documents, including the scheme information document (SID) and the Key Information Memorandum (KIM), to understand the fund's investment objectives, strategy, and risk factors.
9. Consult a Financial Advisor: If you're uncertain about selecting a UTI Mutual Fund or need personalized advice, consider consulting a certified financial planner who can assess your financial situation and recommend suitable funds.
Remember to conduct thorough research and due diligence before investing in any mutual fund, including those offered by UTI Mutual Fund. Additionally, stay updated on market trends and economic developments that may impact your investment decisions.

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1649 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 08, 2024Hindi
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Money
Sir, I am 42 years old. I have one year old daughter. I have corpus of Rs.10 Lacs. Kindly suggest to invest this amount to get me maximum return in coming 10 years.
Ans: Congratulations on planning for your daughter's future. Let's craft a strategy to maximize your Rs. 10 Lakh corpus over the next decade.
Firstly, it's commendable that you're thinking long-term. Investing for your daughter's future at such an early stage showcases your foresight and dedication as a parent.
Considering your investment horizon of 10 years, we can explore a diversified portfolio of mutual funds to potentially generate maximum returns while managing risk effectively.
Here's a tailored approach:
1. Risk Assessment: Assess your risk tolerance carefully. Given your investment horizon and financial responsibilities, a balanced approach with a mix of equity and debt instruments would be prudent.
2. Diversified Portfolio: Allocate your corpus across a mix of equity mutual funds, debt funds, and perhaps some exposure to balanced funds. Diversification helps spread risk and optimize returns.
3. Equity Allocation: Equity mutual funds have historically delivered higher returns over the long term. Considering your age and time horizon, a significant portion of your corpus can be allocated to equity funds to harness their growth potential.
4. Debt Allocation: Allocate a portion of your corpus to debt funds for stability and capital preservation. Debt funds provide regular income and act as a cushion during market downturns.
5. Systematic Investment Plan (SIP): Consider investing through SIPs to benefit from rupee-cost averaging and mitigate the impact of market volatility over time.
6. Regular Review: Periodically review your portfolio's performance and make adjustments as needed based on changing market conditions, your financial goals, and risk tolerance.
Remember, investing is a journey, not a race. Stay focused on your long-term goals, and maintain discipline and patience throughout the investment tenure.
By following a well-thought-out investment strategy and staying committed to your financial plan, you can potentially achieve your goal of securing a bright future for your daughter.
Wishing you the best on your investment journey! Feel free to reach out if you need further assistance or guidance along the way.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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