Hello Anu. I hope you are doing well. I follow your column and read your posts.
I have a different issue. I am single and 30+ years. I have no complaints as I did not find any suitable guy to marry. I had a happy and busy life before Covid. However after Covid, lockdown and this work from home life has become monotonous. I not only lost my uncle due to depression but lost my friends due to fights and misunderstanding. I believe in giving importance so I tried to patch up with my friends but they prefer to break all the connections and move on. I have always had a thing for respect and to be valued. I moved away too coz I felt it was the right thing to do but somewhere it hurts me a lot that I am not able to hold on to my friends who knew me for so many years. How can someone get abandoned and not want to talk and sort things out?
I feel I am overthinking it when the others are not even bothered or thinking about me or it. I really want to move away and focus on my life and career. I try doing it but many times there are so many things that reminds me of them and I get stuck and emotional again.
I am trying some meditation and journaling but it does not seem to clear my mind.
Hence I thought of checking with you.
Let me know if you have any advice for me.

Hello Anu. I hope you are doing well. I follow your column and read your posts. I have a different issue. I am single and 30+ years. I have no complaints as I did not find any suitable guy to marry. I had a happy and busy life before Covid. However after Covid, lockdown and this work from home life has become monotonous. I not only lost my uncle due to depression but lost my friends due to fights and misunderstanding. I believe in giving importance so I tried to patch up with my friends but they prefer to break all the connections and move on. I have always had a thing for respect and to be valued. I moved away too coz I felt it was the right thing to do but somewhere it hurts me a lot that I am not able to hold on to my friends who knew me for so many years. How can someone get abandoned and not want to talk and sort things out? I feel I am overthinking it when the others are not even bothered or thinking about me or it. I really want to move away and focus on my life and career. I try doing it but many times there are so many things that reminds me of them and I get stuck and emotional again. I am trying some meditation and journaling but it does not seem to clear my mind.Hence I thought of checking with you. Let me know if you have any advice for me.

Hello Anu. I hope you are doing well. I follow your column and read your posts. I have a different issue. I am single and 30+ years. I have no complaints as I did not find any suitable guy to marry. I had a happy and busy life before Covid. However after Covid, lockdown and this work from home life has become monotonous. I not only lost my uncle due to depression but lost my friends due to fights and misunderstanding. I believe in giving importance so I tried to patch up with my friends but they prefer to break all the connections and move on. I have always had a thing for respect and to be valued. I moved away too coz I felt it was the right thing to do but somewhere it hurts me a lot that I am not able to hold on to my friends who knew me for so many years. How can someone get abandoned and not want to talk and sort things out? I feel I am overthinking it when the others are not even bothered or thinking about me or it. I really want to move away and focus on my life and career. I try doing it but many times there are so many things that reminds me of them and I get stuck and emotional again. I am trying some meditation and journaling but it does not seem to clear my mind.Hence I thought of checking with you. Let me know if you have any advice for me.

Hello Anu Ji, Firstly thank you very much for your valuable time and feedback on problem. Thanks for understanding me & my POV in this small conversation. After so long Its you who had read between the lines .I am really very thankful of you , that you have given me such a lovely advice. But I am bit confused. After reading mail I was really get very positive and optimistic about my decision. I read ur mail 4 times , I got a positive ray of hope with lot of confusion comes with it . You said “You are possibly still healing from your divorce and are not ready to get into another marriage.” Yes this is the question. Its almost 7 years why I can’t be able to overcome from that dilemma and trauma which I got in past . You said “First, sort your mind out and then think of another relationship” , yes another question what should I sort it down and how ? You said “ what is it that you want and want to do?” this the problem which is not letting me move on.bcoz of this I am so much confused I can’t express you in word . I am not able to understand my wants ……………there is a Cat- Rat Race from Head to heart………from Heart to head all day. In simple words its (Kashmakash). You know ……….. I also want to get married, I want a companion …partner with whom I want to share my emotions, joy’s,……..happiness….etc., I want kids , I want to go for long drives , outings , dance with my wife , and lot of other small big things in my mind, which I was not able to do in past marriage. I want someone, to whom I can share my feeling when I am low. I am strong enough to take care of myself but u know … You need someone who say’s “Don’t worry Allz be well, I am with you “. But for this I have to Trust the other person that’s the thing I Am unable to do it . I don’t know why, I don’t Trust anybody now? why I am creating a vicious circle about trust .? You said one thing very beautiful “So, if you want to stop feeling helpless, take charge of your life and do what you think is right for you” these words really touched my heart .thanks for the encouragement and the words of strength. I really need it very badly. These words give me a new direction to think and bit of strength to my POV. Please forgive me about my English language ……. I am not very good at it and may be you find few thing repetitive and irritating. Pls ignore it . Hoping that I am able convey my POV and feelings of my problem so that u can easily understand…….and on that basis you give Your valuable feedback and advice. Thanks R@@J

Hi, I am 48 years old, job less from last 6 months, due to tech. change, My life is very unstable, I have change 18 jobs in last 8 years, I got divorce in 2011, after of married life of 3 years, now I am trying to re married from last 5 years of did't get good profile, I am very tense, as I have discussed my plam or kundly from some experts pandits, but did't get success. I have 25 yrs of experience but my luck is not with me, every time I am not stay in my job, I don't know why, I am very honest and cool person, and I have not good friend circle, not doing any smoking and drinking, l like to sit slient not talk more, may be this is a problem. pls suggest.