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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |543 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 19, 2023

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Dec 19, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

I got married an year back, an arranged marriage and life was okay till now. I accidentally saw my wife's phone and realized that she had an affair before marriage including physical relationship. when I confronted her, she accepted that it is true and that they have parted ways later. I am unable to accept the fact and have been living in separate rooms now. Please advise as to what to do now as I feel cheated and unable to accept her...

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am guessing your wife's past relationship ended before you two got married. If so, you have no reason to be upset. It's all in the past and everyone has one. Be it a physical relationship or an emotional one, if it was before you came into her life, it should not matter one bit. It is not even remotely close to cheating. Focus on your marriage.

The best way to do so is to sit with her and have an open discussion. It's best you don't push her for details because it would neither be comfortable for her to speak of it with her husband nor will you like hearing it. In short, it won't do your marriage any good. And it's not at all important in the current scenario. You cannot demand someone to disclose everything that happened before you came into their lives. It's up to them to reveal in their own time and convenience.

What's in the past should be there. Don't drag it to the present and ruin your lives. And don't forget that you love your partner and kindness does not cost a dime.

Best Wishes!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 26, 2024

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I have been married from last 20 years. It's arrange marriage and before marriage told me let she had an affair with a har college friend dena hai asked that if any relation physical relation has been done she said no I trusted her and married her but after 4 years of marriage I am notice that she didn't paid any attention or don't love me I always thought that there are some mistakes from my side that's why she behave like this . From last 16 years I was suffering from the situation. Recently I come to know when I saw her mobile accidentally and I come to know that she has the same affair from last 16 years with the same guy when I ask about this she told me that it was by mistake I am sorry I won't do this again after some pressureise she also told me that she did a physical relation with him before marriage and after marriage too. I was shocked cause physically I am fit and capable to satisfy her with all the way still she cheated me. Now she confess me all the things and told me promise me that she won't do any mistake henceforth. But no problem is whenever I am trying to get physical or emotional with her some thoughts in my mind game that she did all the things with another guy and cheating me so I can't make any relation ship with her. How can I trust her again we have to kids 10 year each. Please tell me what to do I am frustrated
Ans: Dear Trade,
You need to decide if you wish to trust her or not. It is difficult obviously with what you have discovered. But if you have chosen to carry on within the marriage, the only way that the mind can be managed is to accept what has happened and work with how things are today.
Give your marriage another chance and only then you can work your work through otherwise you will spend time only thinking about her cheating and what she did with the other person which anyone is not working well for you.
So, are you ready to forgive and move on OR hold onto the past? No decision is right or wrong; it's just what you want and then when you make that decision, make everything else work in favor of that decision.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |543 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 23, 2024

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Relationship
I am 39 years old. Married for 10 years. My wife had an extramarital affair with one boy when I was working away from her since we were both 10 years old. I found her red-handedly. She is asking for sorry. She made a mistake she will not do in the future like that she is telling me. I accepted her because of my son, but the problem is, I still can't forget because I blindly trusted her a lot and she betrayed me. I am unable to work despite living with her. Sometimes I feel depressed. Kindly guide me on what should I do.
Ans: Dear Eswar,

Your feelings are completely valid. Dealing with infidelity in a relationship is very difficult. Simply because you have forgiven your partner does not necessarily mean you have forgotten about it or have mentally dealt with it well. I suggest having an open conversation about your feelings with your wife. It is true that one mistake should not be the deciding factor, still, cheating is a pretty big mistake to forgive. If it is taking you some time to get over it, your wife has to help you get through it. When you do it together, it also helps the marriage grow. The best course of action would be to see a marriage counselor to get more structured guidance out of this.

Remember you do not have to rush yourself to feel all better. Infidelity is a traumatic experience for the one on the receiving end. Take all the time you need to get through it. And don't hold back from sharing with your wife how you are feeling. Open communication helps more than you know.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

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Asked by Anonymous - Mar 08, 2025Hindi
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I will be retiring from my present pvt company job in April' 25. I have corpus about 40 L. Please advise, where to invest securely to get better monthly income from May' 2025 alongwith growth of capital amount to combat the market inflation in every year. My monthly requirement of fund is about 30 K.
Ans: You will retire in April 2025 with a corpus of Rs 40 lakh. Your goal is to get a steady monthly income of Rs 30,000 while ensuring your capital grows.

A secure investment strategy is essential. It should balance income, safety, and growth.

 

Key Challenges in Your Retirement Plan
Generating a stable monthly income without depleting capital.

Beating inflation so that income remains sufficient.

Minimising risk while getting reasonable returns.

Ensuring liquidity for unexpected expenses.

 

Dividing Your Corpus for Stability and Growth
Your corpus should be divided into different categories. Each category serves a purpose.

 

1. Emergency Fund – Rs 5 Lakh
Keep Rs 3 lakh in a high-interest savings account.

Keep Rs 2 lakh in a liquid fund for better returns.

This fund helps handle unexpected expenses without touching investments.

 

2. Monthly Income Fund – Rs 25 Lakh
Invest in a mix of debt mutual funds and conservative hybrid funds.

These funds offer better returns than bank FDs.

Withdraw Rs 30,000 per month using a Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP).

This ensures stable income while keeping the capital growing.

 

3. Growth-Oriented Fund – Rs 10 Lakh
Invest in a balanced mix of equity mutual funds.

This helps to beat inflation and grow wealth over time.

Do not withdraw from this fund for at least 7-10 years.

This will help in long-term capital appreciation.

 

Why Not Rely Entirely on Fixed Deposits?
Bank FDs give lower returns than inflation.

Tax on FD interest reduces post-tax returns.

Debt mutual funds offer better tax efficiency and higher returns.

 

Why Avoid Index Funds?
Index funds only follow the market and cannot adjust to downturns.

Actively managed funds are handled by professional fund managers.

These funds can reduce losses in a falling market.

They offer better long-term returns than index funds.

 

Why Not Invest in Direct Mutual Funds?
Direct funds require constant tracking and decision-making.

Investing through an MFD with CFP credentials ensures better fund selection.

A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) helps in portfolio rebalancing.

This reduces investment mistakes and improves long-term returns.

 

How to Manage Inflation Every Year?
Increase your withdrawal amount by 5-6% per year.

Keep a portion in equity funds for growth.

Do not withdraw from growth-oriented funds in the first 7-10 years.

This ensures your capital lasts longer and grows.

 

Rebalancing Your Portfolio Regularly
Check investments every year.

Move money from growth funds to income funds when needed.

Adjust withdrawal amounts based on expenses and market conditions.

 

Finally
Your plan should ensure financial security and peace of mind. A well-diversified portfolio will help you get a stable income while growing your wealth. A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can help you optimise this strategy.

 

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8092 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 10, 2025

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Money
I am new to this mutual fund since last 6 month.i have been doing a sip of 18k per month.. parag parikh flexicap 5k uti nifty 50 5k motilal oswal midcap 2.2k nippon small cap 1.5k quant small cap 1.5k jm flexicap 1k icici prudential fund 2k is these good.i have a plan of 15 yr investment with 10 percent step up each year..kindly opine
Ans: You have started SIP investing six months ago. Your monthly SIP is Rs 18,000 across different mutual funds. You also plan to increase investments by 10% each year. A long-term plan of 15 years is a good approach.

 

Strengths of Your Portfolio
You have chosen a mix of flexi-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds.

A 15-year investment horizon allows compounding benefits.

The 10% annual step-up increases the final corpus.

You are investing consistently, which is important for long-term success.

 

Areas That Need Attention
1. Too Many Funds in the Portfolio
You have seven different funds.

Some categories are overlapping, reducing diversification benefits.

A leaner portfolio can be easier to manage.

 

2. High Exposure to Small-Cap and Mid-Cap Funds
You have three funds in small-cap and mid-cap segments.

Small caps are high-risk, high-return investments.

Too much exposure can increase volatility.

 

3. Index Fund is Not the Best Choice
Index funds do not beat the market in all conditions.

Actively managed funds adjust to changing markets.

A professional fund manager can reduce downside risks.

 

Suggested Portfolio Improvements
1. Reduce the Number of Funds
Keep 3 to 4 well-managed funds instead of seven.

Choose one flexi-cap fund, one large-cap or multi-cap fund, and one mid/small-cap fund.

 

2. Balance Between Risk and Stability
Reduce exposure to too many small-cap funds.

Add a large-cap or multi-cap fund for stability.

 

3. Invest Through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP)
Direct funds require constant tracking.

A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can guide investment decisions.

Investing through an MFD with CFP credentials ensures professional fund selection.

 

Reviewing Your Plan Regularly
Check your portfolio every year.

Rebalance if some funds underperform.

Maintain discipline and avoid emotional decisions.

 

Finally
Your investment strategy is good, but reducing the number of funds can improve returns. Focus on diversification, balancing risk, and expert guidance. A 15-year SIP with step-up can create wealth, but regular reviews are essential.

 

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8092 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 10, 2025

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Money
Hello...I am planning to construct a home in next 5 years. My monthly salary is only 35000. I dont have any idea how to make my dream into a success. Please give me an idea how I can save my money to make a home with a budget of 30 lakhs.
Ans: Building a home is a big financial goal. You want to construct a house worth Rs 30 lakh in 5 years. Your monthly salary is Rs 35,000. With the right savings and investment plan, you can make this dream a reality.

 

Step 1: Understanding the Total Budget Requirement
The house construction cost is Rs 30 lakh.

You will need to save or arrange this amount in 5 years.

Costs may increase due to inflation.

Having a buffer amount is important for unexpected expenses.

 

Step 2: Evaluating Your Savings Capacity
Your monthly income is Rs 35,000. The goal is to save a portion consistently.

 

First, identify your essential monthly expenses.

Reduce unnecessary spending to increase savings.

The more you save, the less you need to borrow.

 

Step 3: Creating a Dedicated Home Fund
Open a separate investment account for home savings.

Invest in growth-oriented mutual funds.

Avoid keeping all money in fixed deposits due to lower returns.

 

Step 4: Choosing the Right Investment Strategy
A 5-year investment plan should have a balance of growth and safety.

 

1. Avoid Index Funds and ETFs
Index funds cannot adjust to market risks.

Actively managed funds perform better in volatile markets.

 

2. Avoid Direct Mutual Funds
Direct funds need market tracking and knowledge.

Investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) ensures proper management.

 

3. Maintain Liquidity for Construction Costs
Keep some funds in liquid investments for easy access.

Avoid locking money in long-term illiquid assets.

 

Step 5: Considering a Home Loan as an Option
If saving Rs 30 lakh is difficult, a home loan can help.

 

Banks may provide up to 80% of the home cost.

Your EMI should not exceed 40% of your income.

Higher down payment reduces loan burden.

A shorter loan tenure saves interest costs.

 

Step 6: Cutting Expenses to Boost Savings
Reduce unnecessary spending like eating out and entertainment.

Avoid impulse purchases.

Use discounts and cashback options to save more.

A simple lifestyle today helps in building your dream home sooner.

 

Step 7: Reviewing Your Plan Every Year
Track savings and investments regularly.

Adjust plans if income increases or expenses change.

Consult a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) for guidance.

 

Finally
A Rs 30 lakh home in 5 years is possible with proper planning. Focus on consistent savings, smart investments, and controlled spending. If needed, a home loan can bridge the gap. With discipline and patience, your dream home can become a reality.

 

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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