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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |571 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 05, 2024

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Yogesh Question by Yogesh on Feb 02, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hi mam, I have very close friend of mine. He is a doctor and very cool by personality. He is married for the last 26 years but he is not in good terms with his wife ( who is also a Govt. officer) . Actually they are very different persons by nature. His wife always try to convenience him on certain religious faiths but he is a practical guy who believes in doing good with all humans in touch . She still always jeer him in very taunting ways about his belated parents' behavior with her. He has already calmed her by offering her apologies on their behalf. But still she continues again and again. My friend has tried many a time to convince her for new start of relationship but it goes for only 2-3 days and again the same drama starts. I as family friend has also tried to settle the things between both of them (with their permission) but all in vain. Both are 50+ and not now my friend is having blood pressure problems too, He now has started to avoid the situations at home and tries to remain out of home . But this is not the permanent solution of this problem. According to my observation it is really very difficult to convince her on any point. But still I want to help them. Please suggest any possible way-out.-Thanks.

Ans: Dear Yogesh,
Dealing with longstanding relationship issues can be challenging, and it's admirable that you want to help your friend and his wife. Suggest that both your friend and his wife consider seeking professional marriage counseling. A licensed therapist can provide a neutral and structured environment for them to express their concerns, improve communication, and work towards resolving underlying issues. Encourage them to set realistic expectations for their relationship. It's essential for both parties to understand that perfection is not achievable, and compromise is crucial in any long-term relationship.Emphasize the importance of respecting each other's differences. It's okay to have different beliefs and values, but acknowledging and accepting those differences is key to a harmonious relationship. If they are open to it, suggest mediation to facilitate communication and conflict resolution. A neutral third party can help guide discussions and find common ground It's important to note that while your intentions are positive, the decision to seek help ultimately rests with your friend and his wife. They both need to be willing participants in any process aimed at improving their relationship. If they are resistant, it might be challenging to make significant progress.

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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  |119 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 15, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 13, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Vikrant Asked on - Jul 03, 2024 Hi Dear Sir /Mam one of my close friend he is 32 years old now married 6 years ago in 2018. he is in govt job and wife is MA, they have a son 5 years old. After around six months of marriage ,the problems started in relation in family, my friend tells her to respect and she listens to her parents only and her parents tell her to come to parental house at every time when a bit of misunderstanding happens in his family,& she leaves this continues and she lived there for six months then my friends father went to her parents house and advise her that's it's not good way your house is in low's house now daughter. And then she understands and came back with his father then after sometime, she again started querreling and threatened his mom that she will sucide and closed the doors ,later nothing happens and next night while chatting with my friends she threatens him while he was on his duty , that she will eat all pills together and will sucide..my friends got feared , then nothing happens later his father took her to his hoke next day . Them again she lived ther for 6 months around then his father again went and have a talk in between some elders and made her understand..then she again said sorry and came back to in law's house... Then after some days my friend take her with him to his duty place to keep her with himself , so that things can better but after few weeks there also she started doing same things and not caring the child and not making food , and telling husband that ,now I willl tell take revenge how u left me for six months at my home like that she fights with him there. He make her understand that's nobody is here let's live peacefully but said I know your parents are daily filling your ears, why do u talk to them ? talk to me only and give me your ATM I will go for shopping.. now I will do what I want ,I can't make food ,take me to restaurant etc ..she speaks loudly in colony ,my friend request her to not do this she then do more and abuse him and his family.. like wise things gone worse she threatens that 8 can make your family ruin ,I will confiscate your brother in rape case , nothing u can't do my friend gets very scared .. one day my friend went for duty then she calls him and tell him that I am throwing this child (Son) from roof now and cut the call ,my friend started crying there ,after all of that my friend shown some courage and file police complaint Then any how she went to parental home from around 2 years back she is there and living there ,now my friend says he doesn't want to live with her because he suffers the bad time with her & suffered from Disrespectful behaviour etc but he wants his son from her but now she says she will live with him but make a seperate house and leave your parents .. Now what can be done in this situation now how my friend can get seperate from her and get his son back ?
Ans: already replied

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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  |119 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 15, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 13, 2024Hindi
Relationship
Asked on - Jul 03, 2024 Hi Dear Sir /Mam one of my close friend he is 32 years old now married 6 years ago in 2018. he is in govt job and wife is MA, they have a son 5 years old. After around six months of marriage ,the problems started in relation in family, my friend tells her to respect and she listens to her parents only and her parents tell her to come to parental house at every time when a bit of misunderstanding happens in his family,& she leaves this continues and she lived there for six months then my friends father went to her parents house and advise her that's it's not good way your house is in low's house now daughter. And then she understands and came back with his father then after sometime, she again started querreling and threatened his mom that she will sucide and closed the doors ,later nothing happens and next night while chatting with my friends she threatens him while he was on his duty , that she will eat all pills together and will sucide..my friends got feared , then nothing happens later his father took her to his hoke next day . Them again she lived ther for 6 months around then his father again went and have a talk in between some elders and made her understand..then she again said sorry and came back to in law's house... Then after some days my friend take her with him to his duty place to keep her with himself , so that things can better but after few weeks there also she started doing same things and not caring the child and not making food , and telling husband that ,now I willl tell take revenge how u left me for six months at my home like that she fights with him there. He make her understand that's nobody is here let's live peacefully but said I know your parents are daily filling your ears, why do u talk to them ? talk to me only and give me your ATM I will go for shopping.. now I will do what I want ,I can't make food ,take me to restaurant etc ..she speaks loudly in colony ,my friend request her to not do this she then do more and abuse him and his family.. like wise things gone worse she threatens that 8 can make your family ruin ,I will confiscate your brother in rape case , nothing u can't do my friend gets very scared .. one day my friend went for duty then she calls him and tell him that I am throwing this child (Son) from roof now and cut the call ,my friend started crying there ,after all of that my friend shown some courage and file police complaint Then any how she went to parental home from around 2 years back she is there and living there ,now my friend says he doesn't want to live with her because he suffers the bad time with her & suffered from Disrespectful behaviour etc but he wants his son from her but now she says she will live with him but make a seperate house and leave your parents .. Now what can be done in this situation now how my friend can get seperate from her and get his son back ?
Ans: Navigating such a challenging situation requires a thoughtful and measured approach. Here’s a step-by-step plan that might help your friend:

1. Legal Consultation
Seek Legal Advice: Your friend should consult a family law attorney who specializes in such cases. The lawyer can provide detailed information on the legal process for separation or divorce and help in understanding the custody laws.
Document Everything: Encourage your friend to keep a detailed record of all incidents, threats, and abusive behavior. This documentation can be crucial in court proceedings.
2. Mental Health and Safety
Assess Safety: Given the threats of suicide and harm to the child, it's important to prioritize safety. Your friend should consider reaching out to mental health professionals for guidance on how to handle these threats.
Support Systems: Suggest that your friend lean on trusted friends, family, or a support group for emotional support. This can help them manage stress and make more informed decisions.
3. Custody and Child Welfare
Child’s Best Interest: Courts generally prioritize the child's best interest in custody cases. Your friend should focus on demonstrating his ability to provide a stable and nurturing environment for his son.
Evidence of Care: Collect evidence that shows his active involvement in his son's life and his ability to care for him, such as school records, medical records, and testimonies from teachers or caregivers.
4. Mediation and Counseling
Consider Mediation: Sometimes, mediation can help both parties reach an agreement without going to court. A neutral mediator can facilitate discussions about custody and living arrangements.
Counseling: Professional counseling for both your friend and his wife might help in addressing underlying issues. Even if reconciliation is not possible, it can provide a more amicable path to separation.
5. Prepare for Separation
Financial Preparation: Your friend should ensure his finances are in order. Understanding his financial standing will help in negotiations and court proceedings.
Living Arrangements: If separation is imminent, he needs to plan where he will live and how he will maintain a stable environment for his son.
6. Legal Actions
File for Custody: If your friend decides to proceed with separation, he can file for custody of his son. The court will evaluate both parents' ability to provide a suitable environment.
Restraining Orders: If there are credible threats, a restraining order against his wife might be necessary to ensure safety.
7. Long-term Considerations
Parental Responsibilities: Emphasize the importance of both parents being involved in their child’s life, if it’s safe and feasible. Co-parenting arrangements can sometimes be worked out even in contentious situations.
Emotional Health: Ensure your friend takes care of his emotional well-being. This situation is highly stressful, and seeking professional help for his mental health is important.
In summary, your friend should act carefully and strategically, ensuring legal protection, emotional support, and prioritizing the well-being of his son. This approach will help him navigate the complexities of his situation more effectively.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |571 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 01, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 29, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Let it be an anonymous question Husband and my wife above 65 years had quarrels for various reasons including the fact that her brother's behaviour was quite irritating to .But for the wife he was her favorite one.Initially she too agreed this fact and found out a term a term in English about such behaviour of Brother to Sister's husband.The husband used to make such complaints to her.Finally after so many years of happy life she has hired a flat and staying alone.Initially she used to talk to him.But slowly she started telling if she hears his sound the whole day is gone.She has looked after his mother very well andin the same way he helped her parents.Her mother had a heart attack and escaped.His mother in law told publicly that only because of him she escaped.Even though such good incidents were there the present situation is suchthat theyare staying apart.She is not ready to come back.The husband had already put his best effortsto persuade by sending message,voice messages and personal appology for whatever happened.But she is not ready to come back even though his close relatives talked to her several times.But no use.What is to be done to bring back her and to have happy life.Kindly note that the husband is ready for anything to rebuild life.But she is very adamant that she will not come back.In fact both of them are short tempered .But sometimes her anger goes up like a helicopter.How to rebuild this relationship?How to handle the situation?.
Ans: Rebuilding a relationship when both parties are over 65 and facing significant issues requires patience, understanding, and often professional intervention. Here are some steps that might help in your situation:

First, it's important to acknowledge the depth of the emotional wounds that have been inflicted. Both of you have shared many years together and have supported each other's families, indicating a strong bond that has been strained by recurring conflicts. Recognizing the positive history and expressing gratitude for the past contributions can help set a foundation for reconciliation.

Given that your wife has chosen to live separately and is currently very resistant to communication, it might be helpful to suggest professional counseling. A neutral third party, such as a therapist or marriage counselor, can facilitate conversations in a safe and structured environment. Counseling can help both of you understand the underlying issues, improve communication skills, and work through the anger and resentment that have built up over time.

It’s also crucial to give her space while making it clear that you are committed to working on the relationship. Respect her need for distance, but keep the lines of communication open by occasionally sending thoughtful messages that express your willingness to understand and address her concerns without pressuring her.

Reflect on your behavior and be genuinely open to change. Demonstrating your willingness to work on your own shortcomings can make a significant impact. This might include managing your temper, improving your listening skills, and showing empathy towards her feelings and perspectives.

Involving a close family member or a trusted friend who she respects might also be beneficial. They can act as intermediaries to convey your sincere intentions and help mediate the situation without taking sides.

Lastly, patience is key. Rebuilding trust and repairing a relationship, especially after long-standing issues, takes time. Continue to show her through your actions that you are committed to making positive changes and are willing to put in the effort needed to restore your relationship.

If you both can agree to engage in the process, even if it starts with small steps, there’s hope for reconciliation and rebuilding a happy life together.

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Latest Questions
Dr Nagarajan Jsk

Dr Nagarajan Jsk   |314 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Apr 06, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 03, 2025Hindi
Career
Hello sir, Saranya from chennai. Doing final year B pharm. Heard about gpat from my friends How to do this entrance exam for joining pg course Please tell me if any other entrance exam is there for pg
Ans: Hi Saranya,

As you mentioned, many pharmacy graduates are considering the GPAT after completing their undergraduate studies in pharmacy. However, there are several more options available for pursuing a postgraduate degree in pharmacy today.

Here are the options for pursuing a PG in pharmacy:

1. GPAT: You can appear for the GPAT exam, and if you qualify, you will be eligible for a scholarship.

2. NIPER: You can also take the entrance exam for NIPER (National Institute of Pharmaceutical Education and Research) campuses, which include Ahmedabad, Guwahati, Hajipur, Hyderabad, Kolkata, Raebareli, and Mohali. Qualifying here also makes you eligible for a scholarship.

3. PG-CUET: A new option is the PG-CUET (Common University Entrance Test), which is being conducted by the NTA (National Testing Agency) under the Department of Higher Education.

4. Government Institutions: State governments will announce admission through advertisements. Admission will be based on marks or an entrance exam.

5. Deemed Universities: Some deemed universities offer admission through their own entrance exams.

Historically, GPAT and NIPER were the primary options for national-level aspirants. Starting from the academic year 2025-26, the NTA will also conduct the PG-CUET for national-level admissions.

I have included more details about the PG-CUET below.
PGCUET (CODE - SCQP23)
The Common University Entrance Test (CUET) is a National level Test conducted for admission into PG programmes in Central, State, and Participating Universities/ Institutions. The Common University Entrance Test CUET (PG) will provide a common platform and equal opportunity to candidates across the country, especially those from rural and other remote areas, and help establish better connections with the Universities. A single application form will enable the Candidates to cover a wide outreach and be part of the admission process to various Central and participating Universities. NTA has been assigned the responsibility of conducting the Common University Entrance Test (CUET).

Under Participating universities/instituttions are: Central and State Universities, Deemed and Private universities and Government institutuions.

Candidate must only select the test paper code. As the list of universities is dynamic and keeps on changing during the registration period.

A candidate can apply for two (02) Test Papers by paying the application fee (details mentioned at point 18).

A candidate can further apply for (02) additional Test Papers by paying additional application fees as applicable and maximum of four (04) test paper codes can be selected.

Mode of exam is CBT (Computer Based Test).
All Question Papers will be MCQ type. • Candidates can choose a maximum of four question paper codes. • The comprehension section in the General Paper will be available in either English or Hindi, based on the candidate's preference indicated during registration. • The duration of the Exam would be 90 Minutes. • The Question paper will have 75 Questions. • Four marks will be awarded for each correct answer and one mark will be deducted for each wrong answer.
• Language papers will be in the concerned language only.
• M.Tech/Higher Sciences will be in English only.
•Acharya papers will be in Sanskrit except for Hindu Studies, Indian Knowledge System, and Baudha Darshan.
• Humanities, Sciences, and Common papers would be bilingual (English and Hindi).
• The examination would be conducted in 2-3 shifts.
• The English version of the questions in all the question papers except languages and Acharya will be taken as final.

Syllabus: The Examination Syllabus will be uploaded on the Exam.

For the current year the examination dates (13.03.2025 to 31.03.2025) got over. iI THINK YOU HAVE MISSED IT. DONT WORRY. NEXT YEAR YOU CAN TRY OR YOU CAN ASSIST YOUR JUNIORS.

ADMISSION: Admissions will be handled at the level of each of the participating Universities for their respective programmes. After the declaration of the CUET(PG) 2025 results, the respective Universities will declare the counselling/admission schedule and merit list based on the CUET (PG) - 2025 score and any other criteria of participating universities. Please see the website of the concerned university for details regarding admission. There may be admission counselling by the universities with additional fees.

Applicants as per eligibility can apply for multiple test paper codes in one registration form. Candidates should not apply through duplicate or multiple forms, which may lead to the cancellation of all his/her Application Forms

CODE FOR PHARMACY: SCQP-23
SYLLABUS [POC, PIC, MATHS, OC - II, MICRO, APH (I&II), PHARM ENGINEERING, DCH PHARMACY, PHARM ANALYSIS (I -IV ), COGNOSY, CEUTICS-II, BIOCHEM, JURIS, COSMETICS, PHARM TECH, MED CHEM I-III, PHARMACOLOGY I-IV, BIOTECH, DRUG DESIGN, MARKETING, FOOD SCIENCE, QA, MANAGEMENT] HAS SHARED IN NTA WEBSITE.

THIS YEAR 57 INSTITUTIONS PARTICIPATED FOR THE SAID PURPOSE. NEXT YEAR THIS MAY INCREASE.

THE ADVANTAGES ARE NOT ONLY CAN PURSUE PHARMACY, APART FROM PHARMACY, YOU CAN PURSUE - DATA SCIENCE & AI, PUBLIC HEALTH, BIOINFORMATICS, PACKAGING TECH, ENVIRONMENTAL MANAGEMENT, GEOSPATIAL SCIENCE, PG DIP IN AI DIGITAL IMAGING, HEALTH CARE DATA, GEOINFORMATICS, PB-PHARMD, M.PHARM-PV, MSc- MICRO, MSc-NUTRITION, DIETICS.

I believe this information will be beneficial for your future education.

POOCHO. LIFE CHANGE KARO!

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Dr Nagarajan Jsk

Dr Nagarajan Jsk   |314 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Apr 06, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 09, 2025Hindi
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Career
I am a 12th student now in state board of tamil Nadu and I am a government school student what is the minimum requirement for me to join mbbs in AFMC medical College
Ans: The following requirements are mandatory for admission to AFMC.

Age: 17-24yrs
Academic qualitfication: FIRST ATTEMPT with English, Physics, Chemistry and Biology/ Bio-technology taken simultaneously and securing not less than 60% of the aggregate marks in these three science subjects taken together and not less than 50% marks in English and 50% marks in each of the science subjects. They must have also passed an examination in Mathematics of the tenth standard.
Candidates seeking admission for MBBS course at AFMC Pune will have to mandatorily qualify the NEET UG 2024 Examination conducted by National Testing Agency (NTA). 11. Eligible candidates who are interested to join AFMC, Pune to pursue the MBBS course will have to mandatorily register and apply for AFMC, Pune on DGHS

The shortlisted candidates will be called for screening which comprises of Test of English Language and Reasoning (ToELR), Psychological Assessment Test (PAT), Interview and Medical Examination at AFMC, Pune.

ToELR & PAT - Test of English Language and Reasoning (ToELR) in the form of Computer Based Test (CBT) and also Psychological Assessment Test (PAT) to be conducted at AFMC, Pune only for candidates shortlisted for interview. (t) Written Examination Score - Score obtained in NEET (UG) 2024 (720 marks) added to ToELR Score (80 marks) divided by 4 to get a score out of 200. (u) Final Score - Written examination score (200 marks) + Interview marks (50 marks).

MEDICAL FITNESS: MANDATORY AS PER AFMC

ALL THE BEST

POOCHO. LIFE CHANGE KARO!

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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