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NRI Mutual Fund Withdrawal as Resident: Tax Implications?

Nitin

Nitin Narkhede  |36 Answers  |Ask -

MF, PF Expert - Answered on Sep 16, 2024

Nitin Narkhede, founder of the Prosperity Lifestyle Hub, is a certified financial advisor with eight years of experience in helping clients design and implement comprehensive financial life plans.
As a mentor, Nitin has trained over 1,000 individuals, many of whom have seen remarkable financial transformations.
Nitin holds various certifications including the Association Of Mutual Funds in India (AMFI), the Insurance Regulatory and Development Authority and accreditations from several insurance and mutual fund aggregators.
He is a mechanical engineer from the J T Mahajan College, Jalgaon, with 34 years of experience of working with MNCs like Skoda Auto India, Volkswagen India and ThyssenKrupp Electrical Steel India.... more
rudolf Question by rudolf on Sep 15, 2024Hindi
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Thank you, Nitin. I’m still a bit unclear. For the sake of discussion, let’s assume my mutual funds have grown to ?1 crore while I was an NRI. After I’ve completed all formalities with the bank and fund houses and become a resident, if I start withdrawing Rs. 40k per month through an SWP, will I be taxed as an NRI or as a resident? Could you kindly confirm on this?

Ans: Hello Rudolf,
Thank you for your follow-up question. Once you have completed the formalities with your bank and mutual fund houses and officially changed your status from NRI to resident, your tax liability will be as per the Indian tax laws applicable to residents.
In your example, if your mutual funds have grown to ?1 crore while you were an NRI, and you start withdrawing ?40,000 per month through a Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP) after becoming a resident, you will be taxed as a **resident**
In conclusion, after you become a resident, your withdrawals will be taxed as per the rules applicable to resident Indians, not as an NRI.
Hope this clears up your doubts!

Best regards,
Nitin
Asked on - Sep 16, 2024 | Answered on Sep 17, 2024
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Thank you so much nitin, much appreciated your response
Ans: you are welcome
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Mihir

Mihir Tanna  |961 Answers  |Ask -

Tax Expert - Answered on Nov 17, 2022

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I am staying in India from around 4 years and working as a consultant in a Mexican Company (previously I was residing there, but now working from India) and getting income from Mexico. I am also paying tax on my abroad income I am getting in my NRO/ NRE account with Axis Bank. I want to know if I am an NRI or Resident Indian? Whether, I can open Mutual Fund account with NRI status or Resident India status? What will be the tax implications? Please guide me as I am not getting proper explanation.
Ans: Based on available details, you seem to be resident and ordinary resident for income tax purpose.

You can always check status at calculator provided at income tax website (external link)

Accordingly, you should inform bank about change in residential status immediately and change the type of account (NRO/NRE Account).

Also you have to open account as resident for MF and tax implications will arise at the time of transfer of mutual fund units. Tax rate will depend on type of fund (equity based or debt based) and period of holding.

Mutual funds whose portfolio’s equity exposure exceeds 65% are equity funds.

Equity funds held for 12 months or more are considered as long term, whereas it is 36 months in case of debt funds.

Short term equity funds are taxed at 15% and debt funds are taxed at slab rate.

Long term equity funds are taxed at 10% (if capital gains of exceeds Rs 1 lakh) and debt funds are taxed at 20% after indexation.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6995 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 10, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 17, 2024Hindi
Money
Sir, I am a software employee currently earning 25L per annuam i have started invested in mutual funds, invested around 15L lumpsum in different funds such as 4.5L debt 10.5L in Equity (3.5L Large, 3L Midcap, 2L Smallcap, 2L Flexicap) if I have STP of 20K per month from ICICI Debt fund to ICICI Bluechip, and another STP from ICICI Bluechip to ICICI Debt fund, will I be able to overcome or avoid tax when I withdraw my money to buy a house after 15 years of 2 crores? assume if the gains are less than 1 lakh per annum will it apply to other fund manager as well as I have invested in different funds as well like ICICI, TATA, SBI?
Ans: Firstly, it’s impressive to see your well-structured investment approach. You’ve diversified your mutual funds across debt and equity, which is excellent for managing risk and optimizing returns. Investing Rs 15 lakhs with a mix of Rs 4.5 lakhs in debt and Rs 10.5 lakhs in various equity funds shows thoughtful planning. Your Systematic Transfer Plan (STP) strategy indicates a keen interest in maximizing returns while managing risks.

You asked about the tax implications and the effectiveness of your STP strategy for your goal of buying a house worth Rs 2 crores in 15 years. Let's break this down into manageable sections.

Systematic Transfer Plan (STP) Strategy
How STP Works
An STP allows you to transfer a fixed amount from one mutual fund to another at regular intervals. This is often used to move funds from a debt fund to an equity fund or vice versa. The primary benefits include:

Rupee Cost Averaging: Helps mitigate market volatility by averaging the purchase cost over time.
Regular Income Stream: Useful for systematic withdrawals in retirement.
Tax Efficiency: Potential to manage capital gains taxation more effectively.
Your Current STP Setup
You have set up an STP of Rs 20,000 per month from an ICICI Debt Fund to an ICICI Bluechip Fund and another STP from ICICI Bluechip Fund to ICICI Debt Fund. This strategy suggests a dynamic approach to managing your investments, aiming to balance risk and return.

Tax Implications
Capital Gains Tax on Mutual Funds
Equity Funds: Long-term capital gains (LTCG) on equity funds are taxed at 10% if the gains exceed Rs 1 lakh per annum. Short-term capital gains (STCG) are taxed at 15%.

Debt Funds: Long-term gains (after 3 years) are taxed at 20% with indexation benefits. Short-term gains are added to your income and taxed as per your slab rate.

Using STP for Tax Efficiency
Your strategy to transfer funds between debt and equity aims to minimize tax liabilities. Here's how:

Minimize Large Lump Sum Withdrawals: By transferring smaller amounts periodically, you can ensure that any capital gains realized in a financial year stay below the Rs 1 lakh threshold, thus avoiding LTCG tax on equity funds.
Utilize STCG/LTCG Efficiently: Regular transfers can help manage the timing of gains, potentially using annual exemptions effectively.
Applicability to Other Funds
The tax principles apply universally across all mutual fund schemes, irrespective of the fund house (ICICI, TATA, SBI, etc.). However, the effectiveness of your strategy can vary based on individual fund performance and market conditions.

Building a Rs 2 Crore Corpus
Assessing Your Current Portfolio
Equity Investments: Rs 10.5 lakhs divided into large-cap (Rs 3.5 lakhs), mid-cap (Rs 3 lakhs), small-cap (Rs 2 lakhs), and flexi-cap (Rs 2 lakhs). Equity investments typically offer higher returns over the long term but come with higher volatility.
Debt Investments: Rs 4.5 lakhs in debt funds provide stability and lower but more predictable returns.
Growth Potential
Given the long-term horizon of 15 years, your equity investments are likely to experience substantial growth, thanks to the power of compounding. However, market fluctuations can impact short-term returns, so it's important to stay invested and not react to market volatility.

Power of Compounding
Compounding is a powerful tool in wealth creation. Reinvesting earnings leads to exponential growth over time. The longer the investment period, the more pronounced the effects of compounding, especially in equity funds. Staying invested for 15 years allows your money to grow significantly.

Rebalancing and Monitoring
Importance of Rebalancing
Rebalancing your portfolio periodically ensures that your asset allocation remains aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Over time, market movements can shift your original allocation, potentially increasing risk.

When to Rebalance
Consider rebalancing:

Annually: Review your portfolio once a year to ensure it aligns with your goals.
Market Movements: Significant market movements can alter your asset allocation.
Life Events: Changes in financial goals or life circumstances might necessitate rebalancing.
Monitoring Performance
Regularly review the performance of your mutual funds. Assess if they are meeting your expectations and adjust your strategy if necessary. It’s essential to stay informed and proactive in managing your investments.

Mutual Fund Categories and Benefits
Equity Mutual Funds
Equity funds invest in stocks and aim for high returns. They are suitable for long-term goals due to their growth potential.

Large-cap Funds: Invest in well-established companies. Lower risk compared to mid and small-cap funds.
Mid-cap Funds: Invest in medium-sized companies. Higher growth potential but also higher risk.
Small-cap Funds: Invest in smaller companies. Highest growth potential but also the highest risk.
Flexi-cap Funds: Invest across different market capitalizations. Offer diversification and flexibility.
Debt Mutual Funds
Debt funds invest in fixed-income securities like bonds and government securities. They offer stability and regular income.

Liquid Funds: Invest in short-term instruments. Suitable for emergency funds.
Short-term and Long-term Debt Funds: Based on the duration of investment, offering predictable returns.
Hybrid Mutual Funds
Hybrid funds invest in both equity and debt instruments, offering a balanced approach. They aim to provide growth potential along with stability.

Advantages of Mutual Funds
Professional Management: Managed by experienced fund managers who make investment decisions on your behalf.
Diversification: Reduces risk by investing in a wide range of securities.
Liquidity: Easy to buy and sell, providing flexibility.
Systematic Investment and Withdrawal Plans: Offers the flexibility to invest or withdraw regularly.
Risks of Mutual Funds
Market Risk: Equity funds are subject to market volatility.
Interest Rate Risk: Debt funds are affected by changes in interest rates.
Credit Risk: Risk of default in debt instruments.
Disadvantages of Index and Direct Funds
Index Funds
Passive Management: Follow a benchmark index. May not outperform the market.
Lack of Flexibility: Cannot take advantage of market opportunities.
Lower Returns: Actively managed funds can outperform index funds during volatile markets.
Direct Funds
Requires Expertise: Need significant market knowledge and constant monitoring.
Time-Consuming: Managing direct investments can be time-consuming.
Higher Risk: Without professional guidance, the risk of making poor investment choices increases.
Final Insights
Your STP strategy from debt to equity and vice versa is thoughtful. It aims to manage risk, optimize returns, and minimize tax liabilities. To achieve your goal of buying a Rs 2 crore house in 15 years, consider the following:

Stay Invested: Long-term investment in equity funds can yield substantial growth due to compounding.
Monitor and Rebalance: Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio to stay aligned with your goals.
Utilize Tax Efficiency: Use STPs effectively to manage capital gains and tax liabilities.
Seek Professional Guidance: A Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized advice and help you navigate your investment journey.
Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Nitin

Nitin Narkhede  |36 Answers  |Ask -

MF, PF Expert - Answered on Sep 15, 2024

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Dear Sir, i am an NRI, investing in mutual funds and stocks through NRO account for quite some time and i am planning to move to india approximately in another 2-3 years of time , given that NRO have high taxation, i just wanted to understand how to swiftly transfer mutual funds and taxes from nro account to indian resident account ? Appreciate if you could provide advice as well as SWP method ?
Ans: Dear Rudolf,
As an NRI planning to move back to India in 2-3 years, transitioning your investments from an NRO account to a resident account requires careful planning. First, once you become a resident, you need to convert your NRO account into a regular resident savings account. This involves contacting your bank, providing updated KYC details, and submitting proof of your new residency status in India. Additionally, you must inform mutual fund houses or registrars (like CAMS/Karvy) about your change in residential status by submitting a KYC modification form.
In terms of taxation, as an NRI, you are currently subject to higher taxes on your investments. Long-term capital gains (LTCG) on equity funds are taxed at 10%, while short-term capital gains (STCG) are taxed at 15%. For debt mutual funds, LTCG is taxed at 20% with indexation benefits, and STCG is taxed according to your income slab. Once you become a resident, the taxation on these investments will continue under resident tax laws, but any new gains after your status change will be taxed according to resident regulations.
To efficiently manage your investments, you can opt for a Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP). This allows you to withdraw a fixed amount from your mutual funds regularly while keeping the rest invested. SWP is tax-efficient, as you only pay capital gains tax on the withdrawn portion. After becoming a resident, you can easily set up SWPs to your regular savings account for steady income, while the rest of your investments continue to grow.
So to conclude, it is essential to update your bank and mutual fund KYC details when you return to India to ensure regulatory compliance and take advantage of resident tax laws. SWP can provide regular income while managing taxes efficiently. You need to contact a professional Advisor or CA for managing all your assets.
Best regards,
Nitin Narkhede
Founder & MD, Prosperity Lifestyle Hub https://Nitinnarkhede.com
Free Webinar https://bit.ly/PLH-Webinar

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Latest Questions
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |403 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6995 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 08, 2024Hindi
Money
Iam under debt of Rs 10lac and my salary is 23k per month. How to come out from debt and i need to get debt free. So, please guide me.
Ans: Being in debt can be overwhelming, especially on a limited monthly income. But with disciplined planning and commitment, you can gradually achieve financial freedom. Here’s a detailed guide to help you pay off your Rs 10 lakh debt and build a stable financial foundation.

Step 1: Calculate Your Monthly Expenses and Set a Budget
Start by understanding your cash flow. Track every expense to get a clear picture of your spending.

Essential Expenses: These include rent, food, utilities, and any other basic needs.

Discretionary Expenses: Cut back on non-essentials like dining out, entertainment, and shopping.

Savings and Debt Repayment: Dedicate any amount left after essential expenses towards debt repayment.

Tip: Keep a written budget or use a mobile app to monitor your expenses. Reducing discretionary spending will help increase the amount available for debt repayment.

Step 2: Increase Income if Possible
Boosting income, even slightly, can significantly accelerate debt repayment. Here are some ideas:

Freelance or Part-Time Work: If possible, look for freelance work in areas you’re skilled in, like writing, tutoring, graphic design, or programming.

Overtime or Extra Shifts: If your employer offers overtime, consider taking it on to increase your income.

Sell Unwanted Items: Sell items you no longer need, such as electronics, clothes, or furniture, to generate additional cash.

Increasing your income, even temporarily, can help you pay off your debt faster.

Step 3: Create a Debt Repayment Plan
List all your debts, including outstanding amounts, interest rates, and due dates. Here are two strategies for paying them off:

Snowball Method: Pay off smaller debts first to gain momentum, then tackle larger ones. This provides psychological motivation by clearing debts faster.

Avalanche Method: Focus on debts with the highest interest rates first. This method saves more on interest in the long term.

Choose the strategy that suits you best and start making extra payments each month.

Step 4: Prioritize High-Interest Loans and EMI Payments
Debt with higher interest can escalate quickly, so prioritize clearing them first. Some common examples include:

Credit Card Debt: If part of your debt is on credit cards, try to pay it down as quickly as possible. Credit card interest rates are often the highest.

Personal Loans: If your Rs 10 lakh debt includes high-interest loans, prioritize these over lower-interest obligations.

Contact your creditors to explore if they can reduce your interest rate temporarily. Any reduction helps ease the debt burden.

Step 5: Consider Debt Consolidation Options
Debt consolidation combines multiple loans into a single, lower-interest loan, making it easier to manage. Options include:

Personal Loans: Look for a lower-interest personal loan to pay off existing debts. This can reduce the overall interest burden.

Balance Transfer: If a major portion of your debt is on a credit card, look for a card offering a low or zero-interest balance transfer option.

Be cautious of fees associated with consolidation options and make sure to do thorough research. Consolidation can simplify payments and potentially save you money on interest.

Step 6: Start a Small Emergency Fund
While repaying debt is crucial, having a small emergency fund (around Rs 5,000–Rs 10,000) can help you avoid additional debt. This fund is for unexpected expenses like medical emergencies or car repairs.

Building a small emergency cushion ensures you don’t rely on credit if unplanned expenses arise. Once your debt is cleared, you can gradually build a larger emergency fund.

Step 7: Avoid Taking on New Debt
Avoid credit cards, loans, or any new debt until you’ve repaid the current amount. New debt will delay your goal of becoming debt-free.

Instead of borrowing, prioritize saving for any purchases. Practicing patience with spending decisions will help prevent additional debt.

Step 8: Automate and Regularize Payments
Set up automated payments for your debt EMIs and monthly bills. Automation helps prevent missed payments, which can incur penalties and hurt your credit score.

If automated payments aren’t possible, set reminders to ensure timely payments.

Step 9: Track Progress and Stay Motivated
Track your progress each month and celebrate small wins, such as reaching specific milestones in debt reduction.

Seeing your debt balance decrease, even gradually, can keep you motivated.

Step 10: Seek Professional Guidance If Needed
If you feel overwhelmed, consider seeking guidance from a Certified Financial Planner (CFP). They can help you devise a structured plan tailored to your specific financial situation.

A CFP can also provide personalized advice on managing and reducing debt efficiently.

Finally
Your determination to achieve a debt-free life is commendable. By following these steps and staying disciplined, you’ll gradually pay off your debt and move toward financial freedom. Remember, small steps today will lead to a financially secure tomorrow.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6995 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

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Dear sir/Ma'am, I want to invest long term mutual fund for my daughter marriage. She is now 15 years old and i want to invest for 10 years, please advised me which mutual fund best for me. My monthly investment amount is Rs. 5000.00/- please reply soon as soon possible.
Ans: Investing for your daughter's marriage is a thoughtful goal. With 10 years to grow your investment, mutual funds offer a practical approach to help achieve this objective. A disciplined investment of Rs 5000 per month can build a substantial corpus over time. Here’s a comprehensive guide to structuring this investment for long-term success.

Choosing the Right Type of Mutual Funds
For a 10-year horizon, equity mutual funds are suitable. They have the potential for higher returns over time. Considering a diversified mix of equity categories could balance growth with stability.

Equity-Oriented Funds: With their higher growth potential, equity funds can be ideal for long-term goals like marriage. Large-cap funds or diversified equity funds with a mix of large- and mid-cap investments can provide relative stability.

Balanced or Hybrid Funds: These funds allocate a portion to both equity and debt. This approach reduces risk while still capturing growth. Hybrid funds could be a good option to add stability.

Avoid Index Funds: While index funds are popular, they lack flexibility in managing market changes. Actively managed funds, however, allow fund managers to navigate market fluctuations, potentially offering higher returns.

Benefits of Regular Funds vs. Direct Funds
When considering direct funds, you miss out on expert guidance, which is vital for long-term investments. Regular funds through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) ensure you get continuous support, fund reviews, and performance tracking. They help rebalance your portfolio when required, maximizing your returns and managing risks effectively.

SIP (Systematic Investment Plan) for Steady Growth
Setting up a monthly SIP of Rs 5000 is a practical approach. SIPs allow you to invest consistently, regardless of market highs and lows, which averages out costs over time. This approach, known as “rupee cost averaging,” helps reduce the impact of volatility.

Tax Implications on Mutual Fund Investments
Understanding tax rules on mutual funds is important.

Equity Mutual Funds: Gains above Rs 1.25 lakh attract a 12.5% tax on Long-Term Capital Gains (LTCG). Short-Term Capital Gains (STCG) are taxed at 20%.

Debt Mutual Funds: Both STCG and LTCG are taxed based on your income tax slab.

These tax rates are subject to change, so it’s crucial to monitor tax policies periodically. You may consult a tax advisor for updates and efficient tax planning.

Key Investment Tips to Reach Your Goal
Consistency: Stay disciplined with your SIPs to leverage compounding. Missing contributions can reduce the growth potential.

Regular Monitoring: Review fund performance at least once a year. This ensures the selected funds are meeting your expectations and objectives.

Professional Guidance: Consult a CFP periodically to align your investments with your financial plan. They can advise on any required adjustments to optimize your portfolio.

Adjusting for Inflation and Goal Cost
Over time, inflation will impact the cost of your daughter’s marriage. Your CFP can help you estimate the future value and adjust your SIP amount if needed. Gradually increasing the SIP amount can help you meet the target despite inflation.

Final Insights
Your commitment to this goal is commendable. By selecting the right mix of funds, maintaining discipline with SIPs, and staying informed on tax and fund performance, you’ll be well on your way to achieving the desired corpus for your daughter’s marriage.

Invest with confidence, plan regularly, and stay on track toward building a secure financial future for your family.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |1033 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 08, 2024Hindi
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Career
Hello! I am looking to change my career. Currently, I work as a DTP Operator and Graphic Designer in my maternal uncle's offsset printing press business. My father passed away 8 years ago, so my maternal uncle has taken on the responsibility of me, my mother, and my brother. I have been working under them for the past 5 years as a favor of them. However, there has been no financial growth or development in my current position. But maternal uncle asks me to continue to work with them as their childrens are out of their Offset Printing profession. So they expect me to handle the business in future. But this will not happen. Also I'm not sure of the future scope of Offset Printing Press profession due to digitization. Though my mind is telling me to change profession, as of my financial condtion is weak I would have to start again from zero. I am feeling unsure about what to do?
Ans: Hello.
Presently you are working as a DTP operator and Graphic Designer with your uncle. It seems that due to financial problems, your uncle might be taking undue advantage of your situation and taking it granted that you must work for him and his printing press as a bull for 24x7. You said, your uncle's children are not interested in running the printing press. Hence he is expecting to handle the business in the future. I think this is a golden time to negotiate with your uncle from a business point of view and put some terms and conditions in front of him. You must overtake the printing press fully in your control and share some part of the profit with him. Remember, you are young, have solid experience of 5 years and the most important thing is that, your uncle is not dependent on you only. This makes the situation in your favor. If your uncle is not ready to hand over the printing press business to you, then you have an option to search for another job and tell your uncle also in this regard. I can fairly say, your uncle will not think to lose you under any condition. In life, nothing is impossible, With the hands-on experience of 5 years, you may job in an advertising company and a reputed publishing house. Related to your insecurity feeling, even though you are working with your uncle, you are feeling insecure. Hence either force your uncle to accept your terms and conditions or leave him without any hesitation. Try with new people, new organizations, and new opportunities. A little change will make a big change in your life.
Best of luck for your bright future.

If satisfied, please like and follow me.
If dissatisfied with the reply, please ask again without hesitation.
Thanks.

Radheshyam

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |403 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 07, 2024
Relationship
I (27M) am well Educated & well settled in a High-paying Job. Tall, Handsome & Fit. I am a Sociable & Outgoing person, but I never had a Girlfriend because I believe in having an Arranged Marriage with a Girl from the same Community, who's Family background is known to Parents. I strongly believe in abstaining from any kind of Sexual Intimacy until I get Married, due to my Personal, Moral, Ethical, Emotional as well as Religious & Socio-cultural Values. I'd want to experience even my First Kiss, only after getting Married to my Life Partner. And obviously, I expect my Future Life Partner also to Share similar Values. I cannot settle for Marriage with a Girl who had Pre-marital Sex (or even Kissed) anyone else in a Romantic Relationship, prior to Marriage. I would Reject such a Girl, however Beautiful, Well-Educated & Well-Earning she might be (all other Qualities being Subjective). Now, my Family has started looking up suitable Brides for me, within my Community. The Problem is that most Girls of our Community, in this Generation, are Well Educated & Financially Independent, staying in Cities, away from Parents & most of them, probably had Romantic Relationship(s) & experienced Physical Intimacy, at any Base Level. I know this by closely observing & discussing with many Girls of my Community (including my Female Cousins, Female Friends & Neighbours etc). They all are ridiculing me for my Preferences & advising me to forsake my Values, as they are Outdated in this Age. Now, I am Worried that I might never get to Marry a Girl who shares my Values. My greatest Fear is not ending up Unmarried, but getting Married to a Woman who lies about her Past (I consider it as Cheating). Can you please advise me on, how can I be absolutely Sure that a Girl is an Un-Kissed Virgin? How do I bring up this topic with any Girl before Marriage & ask her, without coming off as Creepy? How can I be Sure whether the Girl is being absolutely Honest about her Past or not? What are some other ways to find out about the Past of a Girl, apart from having an open conversation with herself? Please advise me regarding this, my Heart is not letting me foresake my Values, which are my Core Principles. I am willing to compromise on some other Qualities i.e., I'd happily settle down with a Girl who's Below Average in terms of Looks, Education & even Unemployed, as long as I can be Sure that she's an Un-Kissed Virgin. How can I be absolutely Sure of that?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You don't have to forsake your values based on others' opinions of it. If it makes you happy, you should stick to it. Having said that, you cannot force the same values on others. I understand you want a partner who has a similar mindset. The only way to get what you want is an open conversation- when you speak to a match, you can open up about your outlook and clear it from your end that you want the exact same values in your partner and politely request them to reject the alliance if she has any past relationships or has been intimate with anyone in any form. Let her know that you are not judging her, but this part is very important for you. Make it about yourself, because it is. Do not let the woman feel that there is some flaw in her, or start investigating her past.

Now, coming to your other query, how to be absolutely sure that she is telling the truth about her experiences- there is no such technique. You have to trust her. Moreover, you should understand that as much as you believe your values are important, trust in your partner is equally important in having a healthy and happy relationship. While you work on finding the partner of your choice, work on having a little more faith in people.
Hope this helps.

Best Wishes

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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