Home > Money > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help

Should I Repay My Loan Early With High-Return Mutual Fund Investments?

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7072 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Sep 18, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Vivek Question by Vivek on Sep 18, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money

I have taken a loan of Rs. 24 lakhs @ 8.45% per annum repayable in EMI of Rs. 40809 per month and I have Rs. 24 Lakhs invested Mutual Funds and getting @ 20% per annum compounded return. Is it beneficial to repay the loan now or pay in EMI?

Ans: If the loan term is 10+ years, it’s generally more beneficial to continue paying the EMI and let your mutual fund investment grow. Even though you're getting 20% return now, long-term returns average around 12% with volatility, which is still higher than the 8.45% loan interest.

However, if it's a short-term loan (5 years or less), it's better to redeem your mutual funds and repay the loan, as the short-term returns may not consistently outperform the loan interest. This reduces debt and secures a risk-free saving on interest payments.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
Money

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7072 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 03, 2024Hindi
Money
Hello Sir, My Home loan amount is 49L for 15 yrs, 1 year completed. EMI is 48.3K I have additional 2L in my account. I can spare additionally 30k per month towards repayment of Home Loan. I have one dilemma, Should I make Part Prepayment of my loan and reduce number of EMIs Or I invest this amount in equity and MF for my future. What are pros and cons of both.
Ans: It's great that you're thinking about your financial future and making informed decisions about your home loan and investments. Let's dive into your options: making part prepayments on your home loan or investing in equity and mutual funds (MF).

Understanding Your Current Situation
You have a home loan of Rs 49 lakhs with a 15-year tenure. You've completed one year, and your EMI is Rs 48,300. You have Rs 2 lakhs available now and can spare an additional Rs 30,000 per month.

Option 1: Part Prepayment of Home Loan
Pros of Part Prepayment
1. Reducing Interest Burden

Making part prepayments on your home loan can significantly reduce the total interest paid over the loan tenure.

2. Shortening Loan Tenure

Prepayments can also reduce the number of EMIs, helping you become debt-free sooner.

3. Financial Security

Being free from debt provides a sense of financial security and reduces monthly obligations.

4. Improved Credit Score

Paying off your loan faster can improve your credit score, making it easier to secure loans in the future.

Cons of Part Prepayment
1. Opportunity Cost

By using your funds to prepay the loan, you might miss out on potential higher returns from investments.

2. Liquidity Constraints

Using your spare funds for prepayment reduces your liquidity, which could be a concern in emergencies.

3. Tax Benefits Reduction

Home loan interest payments provide tax benefits under Section 24. Prepaying the loan reduces these benefits.

Option 2: Investing in Equity and Mutual Funds
Pros of Investing in Equity and Mutual Funds
1. Potential for Higher Returns

Equity and mutual funds have the potential to provide higher returns compared to the interest saved on home loan prepayment.

2. Power of Compounding

Investing in mutual funds, especially through SIPs, allows you to benefit from the power of compounding over the long term.

3. Diversification

Investing in different asset classes diversifies your portfolio, spreading the risk and potentially increasing returns.

4. Tax Benefits

Investing in Equity-Linked Savings Schemes (ELSS) can provide tax benefits under Section 80C.

Cons of Investing in Equity and Mutual Funds
1. Market Risk

Investments in equity and mutual funds are subject to market risk, which could lead to potential losses.

2. No Guaranteed Returns

Unlike the interest saved on loan prepayments, returns from equity and mutual funds are not guaranteed.

3. Emotional Factors

Market volatility can cause emotional stress, leading to impulsive decisions.

4. Tax on Gains

Long-term capital gains on equity investments above Rs 1 lakh are taxable at 10%.

Evaluating Your Financial Goals
Your decision should align with your financial goals. Consider these aspects:

Risk Tolerance
If you have a low risk tolerance, prepaying the loan might be a better option.

Investment Horizon
If you can invest for the long term, equity and mutual funds could provide better returns.

Financial Security
If you prioritize financial security and being debt-free, focus on prepaying the loan.

Future Financial Needs
Consider your future financial needs, such as emergencies, education, or retirement planning.

Combining Both Strategies
You don't have to choose one option exclusively. A balanced approach could work well.

Partial Prepayment and Investing
Prepay Part of the Loan
Use a portion of your spare funds for prepayment to reduce the loan burden.

Invest the Rest
Invest the remaining funds in equity and mutual funds for potential higher returns.

Mutual Funds: A Closer Look
1. Equity Mutual Funds

These funds invest in stocks of various companies, offering high returns with moderate to high risk. They are suitable for long-term goals.

2. Debt Mutual Funds

These funds invest in fixed income securities, providing stable returns with lower risk compared to equity funds. They are suitable for short to medium-term goals.

3. Hybrid Mutual Funds

These funds invest in both equity and debt instruments, providing a balanced approach to risk and return. They are suitable for investors seeking moderate returns with balanced risk.

Power of Compounding
The power of compounding works best with mutual funds. The interest earned gets reinvested, leading to exponential growth over time.

Final Insights
Your decision should align with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Here's a summary of both options:

Prepayment Pros:

Reduces interest burden.
Shortens loan tenure.
Provides financial security.
Improves credit score.
Prepayment Cons:

Opportunity cost.
Liquidity constraints.
Reduced tax benefits.
Investing Pros:

Potential for higher returns.
Power of compounding.
Diversification.
Tax benefits.
Investing Cons:

Market risk.
No guaranteed returns.
Emotional factors.
Tax on gains.
Balanced Approach:

Part prepayment and investing.
Prepay part of the loan.
Invest the rest in equity and mutual funds.
By evaluating your financial goals and risk tolerance, you can make an informed decision.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7072 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 17, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 17, 2024Hindi
Money
Hello Sir, I m 43 years old. I have received about 80 lacs from a property sale. I also have a home loan of remaining 35 lacs for next 15 years. Can you suggest if I should payoff my loan amount or I should invest 80 lacs in Mutual fund and do a SWP of 50000, to pay EMI.
Ans: You have received Rs 80 lakhs from a property sale, and you also have a home loan with Rs 35 lakhs outstanding. You are considering whether to pay off the loan or invest in mutual funds and use a systematic withdrawal plan (SWP) of Rs 50,000 to cover your monthly EMI.

Let us evaluate both options and discuss which could be more beneficial for you in the long run.

Paying Off the Loan
Paying off your home loan can provide psychological relief. You won’t have the burden of debt hanging over you. However, it is important to weigh this decision against the potential opportunity cost.

Debt-Free Comfort: Paying off the loan would make you debt-free and provide mental peace. This is important, especially as you age and your income sources might become less certain.

Interest Savings: Home loans come with an interest cost, which can add up significantly over time. If the interest rate on your home loan is high, paying it off could save you a substantial amount in interest payments.

Guaranteed Return: By paying off the loan, you are essentially earning a guaranteed return equivalent to the home loan interest rate. For example, if your home loan interest rate is 8%, paying off the loan provides a risk-free 8% return.

However, paying off the loan entirely might limit your future growth opportunities. Let's explore the option of investing in mutual funds instead.

Investing in Mutual Funds and SWP
Investing Rs 80 lakhs in mutual funds and using an SWP to pay your EMI is another approach. This could allow your investment to grow over time while also providing liquidity for loan payments.

Potential for Higher Returns: Mutual funds, especially equity funds, have the potential to offer higher returns over the long term compared to the interest rate on your home loan. Over a period of 10–15 years, equity mutual funds have historically delivered returns ranging from 10-12% per annum.

Tax Efficiency: When you withdraw money through an SWP, only the gains are taxed, not the principal. With long-term capital gains (LTCG) above Rs 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%, and short-term capital gains (STCG) taxed at 20%, this can be a tax-efficient way of generating income for your EMI payments.

Liquidity: By keeping your Rs 80 lakhs invested in mutual funds, you retain liquidity. If an unexpected financial need arises, you can access your funds easily. This flexibility is not available if you choose to pay off your home loan entirely.

Assessing the Risks of Mutual Fund Investment
While investing in mutual funds offers growth potential, it also comes with risks. You need to be aware of market volatility, especially in equity investments.

Market Risk: Mutual funds are subject to market risks, and your returns are not guaranteed. In a down market, the value of your investment may decline, affecting your ability to withdraw enough to cover your EMI.

Discipline in Withdrawal: Withdrawing Rs 50,000 per month might erode your capital if your investments do not grow as expected. It is crucial to regularly monitor your portfolio’s performance and adjust your SWP accordingly.

Interest Rate vs. Expected Mutual Fund Returns
It is essential to compare the interest rate on your home loan with the expected returns from mutual funds. If your home loan interest rate is low (around 6-7%), the returns from mutual funds, especially in equity, may justify not paying off the loan early.

On the other hand, if your home loan interest rate is high (8% or more), paying off the loan might offer a guaranteed return that exceeds the potential returns from mutual funds, after accounting for market risks and taxes.

Debt Reduction vs. Wealth Creation
Paying Off the Loan: This provides a guaranteed return and makes you debt-free. It may also offer peace of mind as you no longer have to worry about EMI payments.

Investing the Rs 80 Lakhs: This gives your money the potential to grow over time, possibly offering higher returns than the home loan interest rate. You can maintain liquidity and generate a monthly income through an SWP to cover the EMI.

Certified Financial Planner's Suggestion
Given your situation, a balanced approach might work best. Consider splitting your Rs 80 lakhs into two parts:

Part Payment of the Loan: You could pay off Rs 35 lakhs of your home loan to reduce your debt. This would eliminate the interest burden on this portion of the loan.

Invest the Remaining Rs 45 Lakhs: By investing the remaining Rs 45 lakhs in mutual funds, you can still benefit from the growth potential of the equity market. You could set up an SWP from this investment to cover your remaining EMI payments, which will now be lower due to the partial loan repayment.

This approach allows you to reduce your debt while also giving your money the opportunity to grow in the market.

Benefits of Actively Managed Mutual Funds
While index funds have gained popularity, actively managed mutual funds may offer better opportunities for growth, especially over the long term. Let’s understand why actively managed funds could be a better option in your case:

Higher Return Potential: Active fund managers have the flexibility to select stocks that can outperform the broader market. This can potentially provide you with higher returns than a passive index fund, which merely replicates the performance of an index.

Downside Protection: In volatile or bearish market conditions, actively managed funds can adjust their portfolio to reduce exposure to riskier assets. This flexibility can help protect your capital, something index funds cannot offer.

Expertise: Actively managed funds rely on the expertise of fund managers, who actively monitor the market and make adjustments to the portfolio based on market conditions. This hands-on approach can make a significant difference to your overall returns.

Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds come with their own set of disadvantages. While they have lower expense ratios, they lack the flexibility and expertise of actively managed funds.

No Opportunity to Outperform: Index funds are designed to replicate the performance of an index, such as the Nifty 50 or Sensex. This means that your returns are capped by the performance of the index. If the market is down, index funds will also underperform, with no opportunity for active management to mitigate the losses.

Limited Downside Protection: Index funds must follow the composition of the index, regardless of market conditions. In a falling market, this lack of flexibility can lead to significant losses, as the fund cannot switch to safer assets or sectors.

Benefits of Regular Funds Through a CFP
There are distinct advantages to investing in mutual funds through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) rather than opting for direct funds.

Professional Guidance: A CFP brings expertise and experience in managing portfolios. They can help you create a customized investment strategy based on your goals, risk tolerance, and financial situation.

Rebalancing and Adjustments: A CFP regularly reviews your portfolio and makes necessary adjustments to keep it aligned with your goals. This ongoing management ensures that your investments remain on track even during market fluctuations.

Tax-Efficient Strategies: A CFP can help you manage your investments in a tax-efficient manner. By planning withdrawals, redemptions, and asset allocation, they can help minimize the tax impact on your returns.

Comprehensive Financial Planning: A CFP provides more than just investment advice. They offer a holistic approach to your financial well-being, considering your long-term goals, tax planning, insurance needs, and retirement planning.

Final Insights
In your case, the choice between paying off your home loan and investing in mutual funds depends on your risk tolerance, financial goals, and the interest rate on your loan. A combination of part payment of the loan and investment in mutual funds offers a balanced approach, providing both debt reduction and potential for wealth creation.

Opting for actively managed mutual funds over index funds could give you better growth potential and downside protection. Additionally, investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) will provide you with the expertise and guidance needed to maximize your returns while minimizing risk.

It’s important to continuously monitor your investments and adjust them based on changing market conditions and your evolving financial goals.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 15, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
I am a 25 year old girl. I have good job and happy career wise. I am in a relationship with a boy who is very career oriented, and runs from the marriage topic also. My parents are now behind to me to get married. I am also interested in getting married and settle in my. When I told my boyfriend about this. He gets furious. He don’t want to communicate with me on this. He don’t give any attention to my problem. He says if you really love me then you will love and you will do whatever needed to be done. Now everything is on me.I am very confused what to do. I can’t tell my parents about him, as he is not ready. I also have a fear, that this boy is not going to marry me, so am I leaving good boys which my parents are showing me. Am I already late...what if I don’t get anyone, will I have to compromise in my life If I will delay. Please help!!
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Let me start with the most important thing- you are far from late. You are only 25; I would say this is your time to focus on your career and live a little. But if you are ready for marriage, then that is great too. But do not ever think that it's too late. It isn't even a little late. If anything, in today's day and age, it's early.

Now coming to your boyfriend- have you ever asked him if he has any plans to get married or if he intends to continue this relationship without ever committing to marriage? It's important that you discuss this. And his dialogue, "if you really love me then you will love and you will do whatever needed to be done" doesn't make any sense because you can tell him the same. I suggest you speak to him openly and let him know that you want to get married- if not right now, but somewhere down the line you want marriage. If his intentions are not the same, he should let you know so that you can move on and find someone who shares the same outlook as you. And, to be honest, not paying attention to your problems is concerning. In a relationship, two people should help each other out in times of trouble.

Please have the talk and reconsider the relationship according to how it goes.

Best Wishes.

...Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 21, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
I (27M) have recently started searching for prospects through Arranged Marriage Platforms. I got connected with a Lady (25F) & we seemed to be getting along quite well, through chatting & phone calls. When we were planning to meet in person, for our first Date, she picked a place which is one of the most expensive ones in our City & just a single Date over there may cost us around ?10 Thousand. Though, I am earning pretty well (?30Lakh/Annum), I am reluctant to spend so much amount on our First Date, whilst we are still in the process of getting to know each other. If I'd been Married to her, I'd be willing to spend that much for celebrating our Wedding Anniversary. But this is just our First Date & I am not even sure whether we'd be getting Married or not. The Date is scheduled for next Month & I'm still in Dilemma, whether I should request her to meet up at a more affordable venue or ask her to split the expenses, equally or proportionate to our Earning (She earns just around ?6 Lakh/Annum). I'm afraid that being so Straight-forward & upfront about Money Matters, at this stage, might give her a negative impression about me. She seems to be having a lot of Materialistic Expectations from me, as I earn much more than her & she has been hinting me about her expectations such as Expensive Gifts & Vacations abroad. Even though I am a person who's very cautious & disciplined with Money, I'd be glad to spend generously, for the happiness of my Life Partner, but not at this stage, when we haven't even committed to each other. Please suggest me, how can I handle this situation without coming off as too miserly? Moreover, I'm also planning to discuss some important matters, such as how we'd be handling our Finances in the Future. But I am worried, whether it would be appropriate to bring up this matter, in our very first personal meet-up? I'm afraid that she might Judge me as too Money-minded & I might lose out on a suitable match. Please Help me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Your concerns are completely valid. Splurging, especially at this stage, is unnecessary. Good connections can be built anywhere; expensive places play no part in it. Also, being disciplined about money is the right approach.

I understand that you are worried about coming off miserly, but you are not. You are merely being responsible. You can suggest another more affordable place and see how she reacts. If she is okay with it, then great. If not, then you should rethink this match. You don't want to marry someone who is in it for the money. Now, coming to discussing how to split the finances, I would suggest you wait a bit. A first date might not be the right place for it. If all goes well, and you think this woman can be a suitable match, bring it up politely on the second or third date, to have clarity on it early on. For instance, you can casually start by giving an example of a friend who recently got married- something like, "Rohan's wife takes care of the groceries and stuff, while he pays off the bill." And then mention that you were wondering how you two should split it if you happen to get married. It is a reasonable question and should not show you off as money-minded. It's always best to discuss these important matters in the initial stages to avoid any conflict in the future.

Hope this helps!

...Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 20, 2024Hindi
Listen
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 20, 2024
Relationship
Hello, I am married for 4 years. And someone from my office loves me. He wants me to love him also even if I am married. That office colleague take too much efforts for me, he listens everything about me, he cares about me. But my husband only focused on his work. So I want love, that boy is the best for the love. But loving another man even if you have husband is cheating. I don't know but I feel that I want both of them and I am confused about it. I also love that man from my office. I am so much confused.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that you are feeling undervalued by your husband but the "I want both of them" approach has never worked out well for anyone, especially in an exclusive relationship. You have a few options here-
You speak to your husband about how the lack of attention from him is affecting you and work on it with him.
Tell him openly about this man and let him know that there's a slight chance that you might develop feelings for him if your husband continues to pay all his focus on work and none on you. This could shake him up from his slumber and help him realize that he has not been fair to you.
Opt for separation- if you do not have an open marriage, you cannot have both of the men. It isn't moral to do this behind your partner's back.

I strongly suggest you consider doing the first option. Communicate your feelings of loneliness to your husband and seek help from a marriage counselor. It can do wonders for your relationship.

Best Wishes.

...Read more

Dr Shakeeb Ahmed

Dr Shakeeb Ahmed Khan  |127 Answers  |Ask -

Physiotherapist - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 19, 2024Hindi
Listen
Health
Hello Dr.Shakeeb, I’m a 55 yrs male, had stents implanted in 2020 because of bad food habits and lack of regular movement, things have improved since then with better control on food habits. My problem is belly fat which is embarrassing and my weight is 77kgs, I was on knee braces for last 30 days bcoz of a slight ligament strain, so not able to do strenuous exercises. Pls suggest a workable regime for belly fat elimination considering my case history.
Ans: Hello Sir. Thank you for your query. Reducing belly fat requires a combination of calorie control, low-impact exercises, and lifestyle changes, tailored to your health history. Start by maintaining a slight calorie deficit of 200-300 kcal/day, focusing on a balanced diet rich in lean proteins, complex carbs, and healthy fats while avoiding sugary and processed foods. Drink 2-3 liters of water daily to stay hydrated. Engage in low-impact activities like brisk walking for 30-40 minutes daily, which is gentle on the knees and heart-friendly. Incorporate simple core-strengthening exercises such as pelvic tilts, seated knee lifts, and standing side bends to activate abdominal muscles without straining your knees. As your ligament strain heals, consult Physiotherapist about gradually increasing exercise intensity, including light resistance training. Prioritize 7-8 hours of quality sleep and manage stress through mindfulness to lower cortisol levels, which can contribute to belly fat. Small, frequent meals can keep your metabolism active, and tracking progress through waist measurements rather than just weight will help you stay motivated. These adjustments will promote gradual, sustainable fat loss while ensuring safety and heart health. I wish you healthy and active lifestyle.

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Relationship
Dear Anu Krishna, I'm 48 married with 2 kids daughter in 10th and son in 5th. Wife works as a VP in a large firm. Since post COVID there has been almost no intimacy. I tried to talk to her and she says that I'm a sex maniac. I said once in six months at least she says not interested. She s fit in good health exercises and all tests are ok. Last year my friend's wife informed me about their private WhatsApp messages and I was shocked. We go on tours and trips and functions and everything externally is normal. I buy her gifts and we go out to restaurants etc. Everything except intimacy. I've tried to talk about 50 times but she doesn't want to talk not seek any help. Infact the signs of this started from 2016. She's 43 now. I m thinking of now seperating from her. Im really fed up. Nothing is working, and she's adamant. I've pulled on for kids but maybe I can be together for a few more years. I can't live with her forever. You generally ask people to get help and talk etc which is done and tried and yet no solution. Can you agree for once that there is a genuine case to not continue It's my life I know but I think I'm 100% right and that i have hit the end of the road. Inhold you in high regard hence writing to you Sameer
Ans: Dear Sachin,
Thank you for your kind and respectful acknowledgement of me.
Now,
You wrote:
Last year my friend's wife informed me about their private WhatsApp messages and I was shocked. - What was shocking? You have not shared this!

Lack of interest in sex can be due to:
- change in hormones
- boredom in the bedroom routine
- lack of intimacy outside the bedroom

Now, what I must agree on is something that we can keep aside, yeah? My job is to try and guide people to put things together of course, if that's what they want. You seem to have already believed that nothing can work; how can anyone guide you? When you claim that you nothing is working, I will still ask you, "How do you know that you have tried everything to know that nothing is working?"

Also, if you have decided to separate, what more can I suggest? You feel that you are 100% right, BUT you know what: If you actually were 100% right, you would not be here checking in with me...Just playing the mirror here for you.
I still would suggest that you work on your marriage; communicate and rebuild...it's a long path BUT the fruits of it can be amazing!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 18, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hi , I am married 2.5 years ago to a man , who is very less in education compared to me , this marriage was done as a compromise or in worries about my future as my parents are no more .. He and his family is average in all case ..cleanliness, hygeiene , social relations, religious practices , education , self respect , financial well being ... all these things are either meaningless for them or they vary poor in those . Nor even they have moral values , as they have cheated me by hiding my husband's age to me . I told them that we strongly believe in astrology and will not go without it . Still they gave me wrong information about his age and he is very elder to me .As I am well educated , employed and self dependant. So they somehow trapped me for marriage. After 3-4 months of marriage my husband was diagnosed (a type of oral cancer) caused due to consuming gutkha and ciggarettes. He lied and denied to have any disease still i started his medication . In some time I lost my job also still continued his treatment , tried to help him in his business , it made a big impact on my sqving too :( But because of his careless business practice , it didnt work for him. Also I paid many times his car's EMI . And supported in all types of expenses be it house hold , his medication or business . He has parental properties in village but they are hardly using it for their own use and wanted to use my money till now . As I now denied to give more money , now they have started looking to sell or rent / lease their property for their use . I have spent lot of money on them , I hardly believe they will try to pay it out fully to me or give some part of property for my safe future now :( I am now 43 and have no children . At other hand my brother is also alone( even being his wife and 2 sons) Wife is quarrelsome and has a history of false case of dowry on my brother and due to this my brother and my family sufferered a lot , its been 20 years now . But this has tortured my brother me and my mother a lot in past .Sis-in-law never let my nephews to stay or sit for some time with us (me or my mother ). And now as my both nephews have grown up my sis-in-law told them lie as if she was victim and , we were the culprit . Children were innocent , they didnt knew the fact , hence taking mother's side now. I thought that as my sis-in-law doesn't like us so unwillingly I decided to marry with a compromise , thinking that after my marriage all will be fine in brother's home , But nothing improved. And now my brother , after my marriage is emotionally alone at home , I feel very sorry about this . I want to go back and take care of my brother , as now he is 53 and emotionally very weak , diabetic and suffering other disease too . Sis-in-law is least interested in his health , care .. so as her children. Going back to parental (it is my father's home, so i also have legal right on that property )home and leaving husband is not so easy, .. Elder Nephew and sis-in-law can become very violent as they are always . I dont want to endanger my brother's health and if I dont go then also .. brother is taking care of him alone ..that too very casually ..how can i make all things correct . Please suggest .
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Hello! Excuse me...
Take care of yourself first before trying to save someone else.
Your brother is a grown man and knows what is to be done. Allow him to process his life's situations. By stepping into it especially in your state of mind will make things worse. Also, if you want guidance on this, kindly post another question else it will get confusing for all of us here.

First think of what you must do to make things better for yourself. Ask yourself whether you are interested in continuing the marriage. A lot of your time, money and energy has been invested in it and based on a lie. You have no clue what else they have lied about...do you want a marriage that is standing on a bed of lies? is it possible for you to trust your husband and his family all over again? What can they do so that you place trust in them again?

If this is not possible, the you are in a place where you need to make decisions about your marriage and your life in general.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x