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Long-distance woes: Should I relocate to India for my boyfriend?

Dr Upneet Kaur |77 Answers |Ask -Follow

Marriage counsellor - Answered on Apr 04, 2025

Dr Upneet Kaur is a medical professional and therapist based out of Amritsar.
After completing her bachelor’s degree in Ayurvedic medicine and surgery from the SKSS Ayurvedic College and Hospital, Sarabha, Punjab, in 2008, she worked as a medical officer at various multi-specialty hospitals in Punjab, handling both physical and mental patient care and clinical decision-making. She spent the next decade leading multidisciplinary teams at various levels.
Since 2022, she has been practising as a clinical psychologist and marriage counsellor.
Dr Upneet also holds an MBA in hospital management from Alagappa University, Tamil Nadu, and an MA in psychology from the Indira Gandhi National Open University.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 04, 2025Hindi

Relationship

I work for Deloitte. My BF is in India and I am on a project based out of Switzerland. Due to the difference in time zones, we are unable to spend time together. Our intimacy has also gone down. I don't know if I would be back in India any time soon. What should I do? He said he will try to visit me once a year till my project is completed. He wants me to seriously consider returning to India.

Ans: Hello mam,
I want to congratulate you first that you are doing so well in your professional life. Not everyone has such opportunities. Now lets discuss about your personal life. I agree that due to different time zones it gets difficult to maintain proper communication. Take out time once and discuss this with your partner. Otherwise long distance relationships do work. It is just correct understanding. And tell him your tentative plan of coming back to India. I hope this works.
Regards
Dr Upneet kaur
Reach me : https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

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we are in 2 yrs of long distance relationship 1yr normal relation now we live in different states and we both study in college now but we know our future job location will remains same even i (girl) having IT job which does not have much scope in state where boy lives and he is doing mbbs even he dont want to switch location becos he want to take care of his parents and even his parents are strict and bhramin family . he is telling me to settle in his place that i dont want to as there os no job scope for me there. Please tell me what should we do what the boy or girl should do to make it work? we really want to make it work.

Ans: The words that you have used 'parents are strict' is an area of concern - what is the reason for being strict? Secondly he is concerned about his parents, wishes to be for them which is fantastic, hope you have had a discussion with him that you will also be there for your parents as and when they need you. Now lets talk about how you can make it work....there are solutions if you wish to make things work, most times 2 people decide and many a times one needs to give in to the other....Sharing suggestions on what can be thought about given there is limited information (1) look at a long distance relationship with both pursuing your career, yes many relationships work this way...but it needs maturity from both sides (2) You look for a remote job (3) You look at starting something of your own, consider self employment - wishing you the best.

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Asked by Anonymous - Apr 27, 2024Hindi

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we have 3 yrs of relationship and in that frm 2 yrs we are in long distance we have great bondings ,no issue on that but the major issue taht we have no future becos he belongs to bhramin family his family is very strict not accept intercaste marriage and also they dont want him to move out of house . right now he is pursuing mbbs and i am pursuing computer science . i live in bangalore as u know its tech hub and best place for me for career but he will make future in gujarat he is telling me to come over there after marriage still we have lot time to think but he dont want to hang me in middle of the situation as he is not able to promise me that he will make it work 100% . He now every time telling me ki if u come to gujarat then only it will work and convince his family and some time he tells me that even if u come their might be my parents not fully accept u and tell u something rudely and all stuffs as i belong to general and may be u will regret for ur career also . what should i do should i compromise my career and do remote job or stay in some small company just for him or otherwise leave him? even i have great fear of not getting any soulmate after this becos as my experiences my elder sisters and brothers are still dint get their perfect partners its hard to get married to unknown i know i am overthinking at this stage but am confuse. i also dont have much frnd to talk about my prsnl problems .its been 2 yrs i have been through my personal loss and family problems also some times i am in pain getting sucidal thoughts its not for the relationships .Please help me with this .

Ans: Tel him to step up as a man and decide. You don't need a soul mate. The one you are seeking is yourself. Choose to be financially strong..

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Asked by Anonymous - Jan 22, 2026Hindi

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My wisdom tooth is biting into my cheek. I am 41 but the tooth is still growing. It is causing a lot of discomfort. At what age does wisdom teeth stop growing? Should I fix it or get it removed? Pls suggest. I have already spent a lot of money trying to fix it every few years.

Ans: Hello

Wisdom teeth usually "stop growing" by the age of 25, provided they are properly aligned and there's sufficient space for them to erupt. But, more often than not, they are not properly aligned or there may not be enough space for them.
Curiously, teeth never actually stop growing unless there's something blocking their growth. Like an opposing tooth, for instance. If an upper tooth is extracted and not replaced with an artificial tooth, the opposing lower tooth can theoretically keep growing into the empty space above.
Your wisdom tooth is improperly aligned and hence will continue to grow indefinitely.
Since you mentioned that it's been troubling you for several years, my advice would be to get it extracted

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Hi Sir, I am 46 years old with a Wife and a daughter (12 years old). Planning to retire by age of 50. Current net worth includes - Stock Market portfolio (including Stocks, MFs, PMS) - INR 3 CR, 2 Flats worth INR 4.5 CR without any home loans. Long Term investments like NPS, Sukanya Samruddhi, LIC, EPF/PPF etc - 1 CR, FDs- 20L, Gold (Physical +ETF) - 70L. Current Monthly expenses - 60-70K per month. Now, I understand that my daughter's Graduation and PG education expenses may cost anywhere around 1CR (inflation included). Also the medical/health expenses will be required too. Considering all of the above, how do you recommend I can plan for retiring at 50? I do plan to stay invested in equities for long term even after retirement. Thanks for your advice.

Ans: Thank you for the query. Congratulations. You seems to have already planned well for post retirement period. However, You have not shared your current income details at present, Passive income after proposed retirement age and whether any of your house property has been rented out. Also not given monthly investments etc. Hence unable to offer my comments on overall financial position. It is suggested to connect with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) and share your full details and discuss your life goals etc. CFP and you both can sit together and arrive at a proper retirement planning. All the best.

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www.finphoenixinvest.com

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My wisdom tooth isn't hurting, but food keeps getting stuck and the area smells bad. Google scared me with infection stories, while some people say don’t remove it unless there’s pain. I’m genuinely confused. Should wisdom teeth be removed proactively or only when they cause problems?

Ans: Hello

I understand why you’re worried - food getting trapped and a foul smell can be very unsettling, but no pain doesn’t automatically mean you can avoid a dentist's visit. If the tooth is partially erupted or impacted, it creates a pocket where bacteria thrive, which explains the odor and can lead to gum inflammation or a low?grade infection. Many dentists recommend _proactive_ removal when they see a high risk of future issues (crowding, decay, cysts) even without pain. On the flip side, if it’s fully erupted, easy to clean, and not messing with your bite, your dentist might just monitor it and suggest a good hygiene regimen (floss, mouthwash, water?flosser).

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Dentist - Answered on Jan 23, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 21, 2026Hindi

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I brush twice a day and floss most nights, but I still keep getting cavities. My dentist says it could be my enamel or saliva, which honestly confused me. I also drink lemon water every morning thinking it’s healthy.

Ans: Hello

You're one of very few people I know who brush and floss their teeth regularly. Keep it up!
It's important to note, however, that your brushing technique is also very important. Not just how frequently you brush.
It's possible your enamel is weak or poorly calcified which could be the reason why you keep getting cavities. If you had a calcium deficiency during childhood - when your teeth were developing - it's likely that your tooth enamel is hypocalcified and hence more prone to decay.
Saliva, like your dentist suggested, can also play a role. Acidic saliva can erode and weaken tooth enamel.
Fresh lime has a similar harmful effect on your teeth. You should at least rinse your mouth thoroughly after drinking lime water so that traces of it don't remain.

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Question by Vivek - Jan 23, 2026Hindi

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I want to invest in Va Tech Wabag till June 2026 , Please suggest ?

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Marriage counsellor - Answered on Jan 23, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 15, 2025Hindi

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How to make long distance work? My husband works in UAE and we have two kids. I am managing everything here and when we talk, there is no love or romance. Even when he comes home there are so many things lined up, we hardly get time for each other. Is this how couples become after marriage? I feel depressed but there is no one to talk to. My children take up my time but at night I feel lonely and miss him.

Ans: Hello mam. I hope you are fine and enjoying good health.
Talking about your life, i understand that it feels very lonely and weird to live a life like this. Every person has a dream that after marriage, we ll live as a couple and will enjoy.
I also understand that it may feel like a burden that you are taking care of the kids here alone and he being working there. But i think you both know that this life has been chosen by you after understanding each and every aspect.
You should take some quality time it may be on phone. Don't talk about your kids ir problems.on phone. Talk about yourself, about your day, your life, what you had today , where did you go today and all
Things will start improving slowly. He ll start missing you the same way you do.
I hope this helps
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Follow me on: https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

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Marriage counsellor - Answered on Jan 23, 2026

Question by SP - Dec 11, 2025Hindi

Relationship

i am 42 yrs married and i married before 15yrs.My spouse cheated me before our marriage, she had a relationship with one guy.. that time i also asked her abt this guy but she not told me anything. and second day of my marriage i came to know that she cheated me.i completely broke down and i told her don't leave with me. go to your home. but she said i didn't know how this happened and i was very sorry for my mistake and i will never do it again in my life.. now its almost 15 yrs went away but still i unable to forgot what she done with me. we have two kids. Since the day i warned her before 15 yrs still today she listen everything i want, every words, whatever she want to do she always took my permission. but still i unable to forgot her past. she cheated me that time... whenever i thought abt her i felt nervous and its effect on work.. what should i do

Ans: Hello sir. I hope you are in good health.
Talking about your life, i would like to tell you one thing. Whatever your wife did it was before marriage. It was not after marriage . So it cannot be taken as cheating.
Secondly, she accepted and promised that she ll not do it again and she kept her promise.
Thirdly as per you she takes your permission wherever she goes, she informs you everything. All this she is doing just to regain trust. I think you should forget the past.
Holding on to past will bring you nothing. Pain and problems badhengi kam nahi hongi. Apne bacho pe, apni family pe and apne kaam pe dhyan de and apni life enjoy kare.
I hope this solves the problem
Take care!
Follow me on: https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

Dr Upneet Kaur |77 Answers |Ask -Follow

Marriage counsellor - Answered on Jan 23, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 06, 2026Hindi

Relationship

My boyfriend's mom is very possessive. Whenever we are together she finds a reason to interrupt or call him away from me. When we go out, she constantly checks on where he is, what we are doing, and how long we will be together. I feel like there is too much interference. He is 31, I am 27. We are both financially independent. But there is no space for us to build our relationship without his mom being involved in our lives. I understand her concern as a mother, but this level of control makes me feel invisible and sidelined. I'm worried how this will affect our relationship if we continue and take it to the future?

Ans: Hello mam..I hope you are fine. Well, coming to your problem mam. We live in a country where it is considered very normal to interfere in each other's life. Be it siblings or children or for that matter anyone. So as per our society this behaviour is very normal for your boyfriend's mother. But on the other hand, in this era this generation is somewhat more independent and don't like interference. If she is interfering too much, your boyfriend should also feel this and he is the only one who can draw boundaries and can ask his mother to stop being controlling.
You should not directly hit this on your boyfriend. Rather talk to him regarding this in a very polite and convincing manner so that he can take care of the matter. But if he feels that her mother's behaviour is ok then also you need to discuss and convince him about your privacy. If you want to take this relationship further then you need to correct the things beforehand.
I hope this solves your problem.
Take care
Follow me on : https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

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MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jan 23, 2026

Question by Vaishnavi - Jan 22, 2026Hindi

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Ai field me jane ke liye MHT- CET me kitna score chahiye

Ans: MHT-CET is not compulsory to enter the AI field. You can enter via a B.sc. in Computer. Score at least 180-190 in MHT-CET to get admission to a tier 1 college, either in the Computer or Electronics branch, to fulfil your dreams. But if you are financially sound, you can get admission to any private college with the lowest score also via management quota.

Good luck.
Follow me if you receive this reply.
Radheshyam

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