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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7337 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
SARAVANAN Question by SARAVANAN on Nov 23, 2024Hindi
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Hello Sir, I want to invest 5k per month in mutuals fund. Am targeting 15acs in next 16years. Can you pls suggest me good fund?

Ans: Investing Rs. 5,000 per month for 16 years to achieve Rs. 15 lakhs is a commendable goal. A systematic investment plan (SIP) in mutual funds can help achieve this. Your focus should be on selecting funds that align with your risk appetite and long-term horizon.

Understanding Your Target
Your target is Rs. 15 lakhs in 16 years.
This requires consistent returns from equity mutual funds.
Equity funds are ideal for long-term goals due to their growth potential.
Investment Strategy
Focus on Equity-Dominated Funds

Equity funds have the potential for higher long-term growth.
Diversify across large-cap, flexi-cap, and mid-cap funds.
Actively Managed Funds Preferred

Actively managed funds outperform index funds over long durations.
A good fund manager can provide better returns than passive funds.
Avoid Direct Funds

Investing through a Certified Financial Planner ensures professional advice.
Regular funds with guidance offer better portfolio tracking and rebalancing.
Monitor and Review Regularly

Review your investments yearly to stay aligned with your goal.
Make changes based on performance and market conditions.
Suggested Fund Categories
Large-Cap Funds

These funds provide stability and moderate growth.
They invest in well-established companies with strong performance records.
Flexi-Cap Funds

These funds invest across large, mid, and small-cap companies.
They offer flexibility and diversification.
Mid-Cap Funds

Mid-cap funds offer higher growth potential but come with moderate risk.
Suitable for long-term wealth creation.
Hybrid Funds

These funds balance equity and debt exposure.
They provide moderate risk with consistent returns.
Tax Considerations
Equity Fund Taxation

Long-term capital gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.
Short-term capital gains are taxed at 20%.
Tax-Efficient Withdrawals

Plan withdrawals strategically to minimise tax liability.
Hold funds for the long term to benefit from favourable tax rates.
Other Recommendations
Build an Emergency Fund

Set aside at least six months’ expenses in a liquid fund.
This provides financial security during emergencies.
Stay Invested for the Entire Duration

Equity investments need time to grow and overcome volatility.
Avoid premature withdrawals to maximise returns.
Disciplined Investing

Continue SIPs without interruption to achieve your goal.
Market fluctuations should not deter your commitment.
Final Insights
With disciplined investing and the right fund selection, achieving Rs. 15 lakhs in 16 years is possible. Focus on equity funds for long-term growth and consult a Certified Financial Planner for professional guidance.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP
Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7337 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 29, 2024

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Maam pls suggest me 5or 6 mutual fund which i can do invest long time 12 to 20 years .my capacity is 10k per months i will take 50 percent risk if i take 100 percent risk can do this same in 10 years my goal is 1 cr
Ans: It’s great to see your commitment to securing your financial future. Let’s explore how you can achieve your goal of Rs. 1 crore by investing Rs. 10,000 per month.

Understanding Your Investment Horizon and Risk Appetite
You have a long-term investment horizon of 12 to 20 years. This gives you the advantage of time, allowing your investments to grow and compound. With a willingness to take up to 50% risk, you can consider a mix of equity and hybrid funds. If you are comfortable with 100% risk, you can focus more on equity funds.

Importance of Diversification
Diversification is key to managing risk while aiming for high returns. By spreading investments across various mutual funds, you reduce the impact of poor performance in any single fund. This approach enhances the stability of your portfolio.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds have professional fund managers who make strategic decisions. They aim to outperform the market by selecting high-potential stocks. This active management can provide better returns compared to passive funds, especially over long periods.

Potential Mutual Fund Categories for Your Portfolio
1. Large-Cap Funds
Large-cap funds invest in well-established companies with a large market capitalization. These funds are relatively stable and can provide steady returns. They are less volatile compared to mid-cap and small-cap funds, making them suitable for moderate risk tolerance.

2. Mid-Cap Funds
Mid-cap funds invest in medium-sized companies that have high growth potential. These funds are riskier than large-cap funds but can offer higher returns. For an investor with a 50% risk appetite, mid-cap funds can be a good choice.

3. Small-Cap Funds
Small-cap funds invest in smaller companies with significant growth prospects. These funds are more volatile but can provide substantial returns. If you are willing to take 100% risk, including small-cap funds in your portfolio can be beneficial.

4. Multi-Cap Funds
Multi-cap funds invest across companies of various sizes and sectors. They offer a balanced approach by combining large-cap stability with mid-cap and small-cap growth. This diversification within the fund itself reduces risk and enhances returns.

5. Hybrid Funds
Hybrid funds invest in a mix of equity and debt instruments. They provide exposure to the growth potential of equities while offering the stability of debt. For investors with moderate risk tolerance, hybrid funds can be a safe yet profitable option.

Regular Monitoring and Rebalancing
Investing in mutual funds requires regular monitoring. Rebalance your portfolio periodically to maintain the desired asset allocation. This ensures your investments remain aligned with your risk tolerance and financial goals.

Advantages of Investing Through a Certified Financial Planner
A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can help you select suitable mutual funds. They provide expert advice and personalized strategies based on your financial situation. Investing through a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) with CFP credentials ensures professional management of your investments.

Disadvantages of Direct Funds
Direct funds require investors to make all decisions independently. Without professional guidance, it can be challenging to choose the right funds and manage the portfolio. Regular funds, advised by a CFP, offer better management and informed decision-making.

SIPs: A Disciplined Investment Approach
Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs) are an excellent way to invest regularly. They help inculcate a disciplined investment habit. SIPs allow you to invest small amounts consistently, reducing the impact of market volatility.

Evaluating Fund Performance
When selecting mutual funds, consider their historical performance. Look for funds with a consistent track record of outperforming their benchmarks. Evaluate the fund manager’s expertise and the fund’s expense ratio to ensure efficient management.

Importance of Patience and Long-Term Perspective
Long-term investments require patience and a steady approach. Market fluctuations are normal, but staying invested allows your money to grow. The power of compounding works best over extended periods, helping you achieve your financial goals.

Conclusion
With a disciplined investment strategy and the right mix of mutual funds, you can achieve your goal of Rs. 1 crore. Diversify your portfolio, monitor regularly, and seek professional guidance from a Certified Financial Planner. This approach will help you balance risk and returns effectively, ensuring a secure financial future for you and your family.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7337 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 27, 2024

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Hello sir, I want to invest 8k- 10k monthly in mutual funds for a period of profitable 5 years. Please suggest some good MF to invest in.
Ans: You aim to invest Rs. 8k-10k monthly in mutual funds for five years. This is a medium-term goal, requiring a balanced approach to manage risk and ensure good returns.

Benefits of Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs)
Rupee Cost Averaging: SIPs help in averaging out the purchase cost over time. This reduces the impact of market volatility.

Financial Discipline: Regular investments instil a sense of financial discipline. It ensures you save and invest consistently.

Compounding Benefits: SIPs leverage the power of compounding. This maximises returns over the investment period.

Recommended Investment Strategy
Balanced Portfolio: For a five-year period, a balanced portfolio is ideal. It should include a mix of equity and debt funds to manage risk and ensure growth.

Large-Cap Funds: Invest in large-cap funds for stability. These funds invest in well-established companies, offering steady returns.

Mid-Cap Funds: Allocate a portion to mid-cap funds. These funds have a higher growth potential, though they carry moderate risk.

Aggressive Hybrid Funds: Consider aggressive hybrid funds. They provide a mix of equity and debt, balancing risk and return.

Actively Managed Funds vs. Index Funds
Disadvantages of Index Funds:

Passive Management: Index funds are passively managed. They aim to replicate the market index, lacking the ability to outperform.

No Flexibility: Index funds do not adapt to market changes. They stick to the index, regardless of market conditions.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds:

Strategic Management: Actively managed funds are handled by professional fund managers. They make strategic decisions to maximise returns.

Adaptive Approach: These funds adapt to market conditions. This flexibility often results in better performance compared to index funds.

Direct Funds vs. Regular Funds
Disadvantages of Direct Funds:

Lack of Guidance: Direct funds do not provide expert advice. You might miss out on strategic insights and market trends.

Better Service: Investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) ensures regular portfolio reviews and professional guidance.

Benefits of Regular Funds:

Professional Advice: Regular funds offer expert advice. This helps in making informed investment decisions.

Comprehensive Service: Regular funds come with additional services, such as financial planning and portfolio management.

Investment Recommendations
1. Set Clear Objectives:

Define your investment goals. Understand your risk tolerance and the amount needed at the end of five years.
2. Diversify Your Portfolio:

Allocate your monthly investment across large-cap, mid-cap, and aggressive hybrid funds.

This diversification ensures stability and growth.

3. Regular Review:

Review your portfolio every six months. Adjust your investments based on performance and market conditions.
4. Emergency Fund:

Keep an emergency fund separate. This ensures you do not need to withdraw from your investments in case of unforeseen expenses.
5. Tax Planning:

Consider tax-saving mutual funds if they align with your goals. This helps in reducing your tax liability while investing.
Final Insights
Investing Rs. 8k-10k monthly in mutual funds through SIPs is a wise choice. It offers financial discipline, manages risk, and leverages the power of compounding. Diversify your portfolio across large-cap, mid-cap, and aggressive hybrid funds. Seek professional guidance to optimise your investment strategy.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7337 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Sep 28, 2024

Money
i have invested lump sum 20000 in parag flexi cap fund and 6000 in kotak quant fund i want to invest aroung 20000 a month suggest me mutual fund with 5 years horizon
Ans: With a 5-year investment horizon, your focus should be on balancing growth potential with some risk management. Since you have already invested in a flexi cap and a quant fund, you have made a good start. Below are some mutual fund categories that can further diversify your portfolio and align with your 5-year financial goal.

1. Aggressive Hybrid Funds
Aggressive hybrid funds invest about 65%-80% in equities and the rest in debt. These funds are designed to provide growth with a cushion of safety through their debt component. For a 5-year horizon, these funds can help you capture equity growth while reducing volatility.

These funds help limit downside risk if the equity market corrects in the short term.
Over a 5-year period, aggressive hybrid funds may offer better risk-adjusted returns than pure equity funds.
2. Large and Mid-Cap Funds
Large and mid-cap funds offer a balance between stability and growth. Large-cap stocks are more stable, while mid-caps provide the potential for higher returns.

Large-caps tend to provide stability during volatile periods.
Mid-caps, although riskier, can offer higher returns in a growth market.
Over a 5-year period, this category can provide a balance between risk and reward. You already have exposure to flexi caps through your Parag Flexi Cap Fund, but large and mid-cap funds can further strengthen this strategy.

3. Multi-Asset Funds
Multi-asset funds are designed to invest across multiple asset classes such as equities, debt, and gold. This diversification helps reduce the impact of market volatility. In the short-to-medium term, these funds can provide a more stable growth trajectory.

These funds are suitable for investors who want diversification without actively managing different asset classes.
They offer a balanced return, reducing the dependency on just one asset class.
For a 5-year horizon, these funds can give you peace of mind by spreading the risk across various assets.

4. Dynamic Bond Funds
Dynamic bond funds adjust their portfolio based on interest rate movements. Since interest rates can fluctuate over a 5-year period, dynamic bond funds offer flexibility in managing this.

These funds can offer more stability compared to equity funds.
While they generally provide lower returns than equity funds, they can be part of your portfolio for a balance of stability and growth.
For a 5-year horizon, dynamic bond funds can add a layer of stability to your portfolio without completely moving out of growth opportunities.

5. ELSS Funds for Tax Saving
Though primarily tax-saving instruments, ELSS (Equity Linked Savings Scheme) funds can also serve your investment needs. They have a mandatory 3-year lock-in, which ensures you remain invested for the short term and benefit from equity growth.

ELSS funds offer tax deductions under Section 80C, making them an attractive option.
They primarily invest in equities, which can help your portfolio grow over the medium term.
Considering your 5-year horizon, the 3-year lock-in period is manageable. You can continue to hold the funds for two more years to maximize your returns.

Key Considerations
Risk Tolerance: Since you have a 5-year horizon, it’s important to balance risk and return. While equities provide growth, debt and hybrid funds can reduce volatility.
Diversification: You’ve already invested in equity-based funds. Now, you can consider adding hybrid or multi-asset funds to diversify your portfolio.
Review Your Portfolio: Although a 5-year horizon isn’t long enough for frequent changes, it's important to review your portfolio periodically to ensure it's aligned with your goal.
Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds, while low-cost, lack the flexibility of actively managed funds. Over a 5-year period, actively managed funds can better adapt to market conditions. Index funds merely track a market index, and during downturns, they offer no protection from losses.

Actively managed funds have the potential to outperform the market in the short-to-medium term.
Fund managers can take advantage of market inefficiencies, which index funds cannot.
Given your 5-year horizon, active fund management is preferable for potentially better returns.

Final Insights
Your decision to invest Rs 20,000 monthly is a smart step towards building a robust financial future. With a 5-year horizon, a balanced approach combining equity and hybrid funds can provide both growth and stability. Diversifying across different fund types will ensure that your portfolio remains resilient in the face of market volatility.

While your existing investments in a flexi cap and quant fund are a good start, adding large and mid-cap, aggressive hybrid, and multi-asset funds will strengthen your portfolio. Dynamic bond funds can offer stability, and ELSS funds can help you save on taxes while investing for growth.

By choosing actively managed funds over index funds, you allow your portfolio the flexibility to adapt to changing market conditions. A certified financial planner can guide you in selecting the right mix of funds and regularly reviewing your portfolio to stay on track.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

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Pushpa

Pushpa R  |37 Answers  |Ask -

Yoga, Mindfulness Expert - Answered on Dec 27, 2024

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I HAVE CONSTIPACATION PROBLEM WICH AASAN RELIVE FROM THIS PROBLEM
Ans: Constipation can be uncomfortable, but yoga is an excellent way to stimulate digestion and relieve this issue. Here are some simple asanas you can try regularly to help improve bowel movements:

1. Pavanamuktasana (Wind-Relieving Pose)
Lie on your back and bring one knee to your chest, holding it with your hands.
Press your knee gently into your abdomen while keeping the other leg straight.
Switch legs and repeat, or do both knees together.
This pose massages your abdominal organs and promotes digestion.
2. Marjaryasana-Bitilasana (Cat-Cow Pose)
Begin on all fours.
As you inhale, arch your back (Cow Pose) and look up.
As you exhale, round your back (Cat Pose) and tuck your chin to your chest.
Repeat slowly for 8-10 breaths to massage your digestive organs and improve gut motility.
3. Malasana (Garland Pose)
Squat down with your feet wide apart and palms together at your chest.
Keep your spine straight and hold this pose for a few breaths.
This pose helps open up the pelvic area, aiding digestion and elimination.
4. Paschimottanasana (Seated Forward Bend)
Sit with your legs straight and bend forward from your hips, reaching for your toes.
This stretches the abdominal area and stimulates digestion.
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Drink plenty of water and include fiber-rich foods in your diet.
Practice these poses daily, but avoid forcing your body into any position.
If constipation persists, consult a doctor and consider working with a yoga coach for personalized guidance.

R. Pushpa, M.Sc (Yoga)
Online Yoga & Meditation Coach
Radiant YogaVibes
https://www.instagram.com/pushpa_radiantyogavibes/

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |475 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 26, 2024

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I am talking to a boy for arranged marriage. He said me that come to Bangalore you will have a good career. But he is also asking me if I can leave my job if I have got some responsibility in life to which I said yes. Then I said that I prefer own cooked food over cook cooked food. Then he asked me if I can cook for 2 people to which I said that I will have to look if I can do. He seems to be supportive when he talks on phone. Is he brain washing me, should I say yes or no. Is he a red flag. What should I do.
Ans: Dear Moumita,
It isn't fair to label someone as a red flag over a few days of conversation; seeing women take up responsibilities of home and disregard their own career or needs might be what he has seen growing up and it's not him being a red flag intentionally. A lot has to do with upbringing. What I can suggest with confidence is that if you love having your own job, and your own financial independence then please be vocal about it. Just because he is asking you to leave your job doesn't mean you have to do it- you are only in the talking phase. You are not married yet. You have ample time to rethink your choice. Cooking and housework shouldn’t just be your responsibility, just like earning and providing shouldn’t only be his. It’s about sharing the load equally. Having said that, I should also mention that every relationship is different, and each couple finds their own way of balancing things. Ultimately, everything boils down to what you are comfortable with- please take some time to figure that out and only then decide whether or not to take this relationship ahead.

Hope this helps.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |447 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 25, 2024
Relationship
Hi, My GF of last 2.5 years gets attracted to men very often and shares her feelings with me as well. She developed feelings for a guy a year back and he kissed her once when they were drunk. She said she didn't had time to react and Later they had a talk, she informed me that they chose to be friends, she doesn't seems to in talking terms any more with him. She talks to lot of male friends who she claims are from LGBTQ community which I doubt whether all are or not. I always say she has the freedom to move on any given day but she can't cheat but she doesn't think getting attracted to multiple men and acting on it as cheating . She says, she is free spirited and she is ok even if I visit a prostitute house. She is in her early 30s. She had a crush another guy on insta and said she will definitely try him if he wasn't lot younger than her but later said he is her best friend and she is in constant touch. Lately, she says vibe doesn't match and have problem saying I am her BF. I tried to move on from relationship 2-3 times because of her above traits and now stopped talking since few days. She had both mental and medical issues. Can I trust her and will she have any mental issues again?
Ans: While it’s commendable that she is honest about her feelings and gives you the freedom to make your choices, it’s equally important to consider whether her values and actions align with what you need in a partner. Relationships thrive when there’s mutual respect, understanding, and agreement on boundaries. If her actions or mindset make you feel undervalued or emotionally unsafe, it’s crucial to reflect on whether this relationship is truly serving your well-being.

The fact that you’ve tried to move on multiple times suggests that there is a deeper discomfort within you about the dynamics between you two. Trust is not just about fidelity; it’s about emotional safety, reliability, and mutual respect. If her behavior consistently makes you question her commitment or your place in her life, that erosion of trust can become difficult to rebuild.

As for her mental and medical challenges, it’s important to approach those with empathy, but also with a clear understanding that you cannot "fix" or "heal" someone unless they are actively seeking and working toward their own well-being. If she has not addressed her mental health or continues behaviors that affect the relationship without taking responsibility, it can lead to ongoing strain for you. Her mental health challenges are not excuses for harmful behavior, nor should they become reasons for you to sacrifice your own emotional health.

You’ve already shown patience and willingness to work through these challenges, but the repeated cycles of doubt and frustration may be a sign that the relationship is taking more from you than it’s giving. Ask yourself if you feel supported, valued, and emotionally safe in this partnership. Relationships should bring out the best in you and your partner, not leave you questioning your worth or constantly trying to accommodate behavior that feels unfair.

Taking a step back, as you’ve done now, can give you the clarity to evaluate what you truly want and need in a relationship. If trust feels irreparably broken or if her behaviors and values are fundamentally misaligned with yours, it may be time to consider whether staying in this relationship is the healthiest choice for you. You deserve a partner who respects your boundaries and builds a connection based on mutual trust and understanding.

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Kanchan Rai  |447 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 23, 2024Hindi
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Hi Anu, My husband is in living relationship with another lady since April in another country. At the same time, he acused me as selfish for doing my PhD in my native country and put me in mental trauma by verbally accusing.Also,he was very clever, he step by step get rid of all the things related to our relationship and took bank all the bank fund in my name.After that he blocked me.I had doubts on his extra marital and asked him 1000 times. But he simply insulted and blocked me from all social media eventually. After finishing my PhD pre submission, when i went to meet him, in his place. I found him, shifted to another apartment. But i somehow, found it and there i came to knew, he is staying with a lady there for past months. I broke down and informed all his friends. Now he is threatening me for signing mutual consent, otherwise he will make false allegations and tore my good name..Already he partially did that. When I talked to his friends, he was crooked enough to tell them, i am a psycho, ademant, career oriented lady. I told him i am ready to give him mutual divorce after once we met in person. I want to ask him why he cheated me.but he is not ready to meet, he is asking me to talk to his advocate. What shall I do now?
Ans: While it’s natural to want answers and closure, sometimes people who betray us in such profound ways refuse to provide the accountability we seek. Closure doesn’t always come from the other person. It can come from recognizing that their actions stem from their own flaws and failings, not because of anything lacking in you. It can come from choosing to let go of the need for explanations and focusing instead on rebuilding your own sense of peace and purpose.

You’ve already demonstrated incredible strength by standing up to him and exposing the truth to his friends. That takes courage. But this is also a time to lean into your inner resilience and ensure you’re supported by professionals who can guide you through the legal and emotional complexities. Speaking with a family lawyer who understands the nuances of your situation will help you feel empowered to navigate his threats and protect your rights. At the same time, connecting with a counselor or therapist can offer a safe space to process your emotions and begin to heal from this trauma.

It’s okay to grieve the relationship and the betrayal. It’s okay to feel anger, sadness, or even numbness at times. These emotions are all part of the process of moving forward. Allow yourself to feel them without judgment, but also remind yourself that this pain is temporary and does not define you. You are more than what has been done to you.

When you feel ready, try to shift your focus away from him and his actions and toward your own well-being and future. You’ve worked so hard on your PhD and have built a life full of potential and possibility. This chapter doesn’t have to define the rest of your story. You are capable of creating a life that is free from manipulation and filled with self-respect, joy, and the kind of peace that comes from living authentically.

Lean on the people who believe in you, who see your value, and who can remind you of your strength when you feel unsure. Remember, you don’t have to handle this alone. Whether it’s through professional guidance or emotional support from trusted loved ones, there are paths forward that will help you rise above this situation. You deserve a life where your worth is honored, your boundaries are respected, and your happiness takes center stage.

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Kanchan Rai  |447 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 23, 2024Hindi
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Hello, I am a 35-year woman from Manali, divorced for three years now. My family is constantly pushing me to get remarried, saying it’s ‘for my own good.’ But honestly, I don’t feel the need for marriage again. I’m financially stable, have great friends, and I genuinely enjoy my independence. Despite explaining this to my family multiple times, they keep bringing up alliances and even guilt-trip me, saying things like, ‘Who will take care of you when you’re older?’ or ‘What will society think?’ I’m exhausted from these arguments and feel like I’m being cornered into something I don’t want. How do I stand firm in my decision while maintaining my relationship with my family? How do I help them understand that being single is a choice, not a problem to fix?
Ans: When speaking to your family, try to approach the conversation from a place of empathy. Acknowledge their intentions by telling them you understand their worries and that they want what they believe is best for you. Express gratitude for their care—it often helps diffuse their defensiveness. However, it’s equally important to gently but firmly assert that your happiness is not dependent on remarriage. Share how content you are with your current life, emphasizing your financial stability, fulfilling friendships, and personal growth.

Sometimes families struggle to accept choices that diverge from traditional norms, often driven by fears about societal perceptions or imagined futures. Reassure them that your decision is rooted in thoughtful consideration and self-awareness, and that you’ve built a life that brings you peace and joy. If they bring up concerns like loneliness or old age, you can address these by expressing how you’ve cultivated strong support systems and how your independence equips you to face challenges.

It might also help to set gentle boundaries. For instance, you could say, “I appreciate that you care for me, but I’d like our time together to focus on enjoying each other’s company instead of discussing remarriage.” It’s okay to redirect conversations or take a break from them when you feel cornered.

Lastly, remember that changing deeply ingrained beliefs takes time. Your family might not immediately understand your perspective, but consistency and calm communication will help over time. It’s not your responsibility to conform to their expectations if doing so diminishes your sense of self. By staying true to your values while showing compassion for their concerns, you’re paving the way for mutual respect and understanding.

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Dr Nandita

Dr Nandita Palshetkar  |36 Answers  |Ask -

Gynaecologist, IVF expert - Answered on Dec 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 19, 2024Hindi
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Dr, I’m 35 years old from Jamnagar, and my husband and I have been trying for a baby for the past year, but nothing seems to be working. I recently visited a fertility clinic in neighborhood , and after a few tests, they mentioned that I might have blocked fallopian tubes. The gynaec also talked about possible treatments like surgery or IVF, but I’m really confused and worried. Should I go for a laparoscopy to check the severity, or are there any other alternatives that could help me? I’m really anxious and just want to understand my options better before making any decisions.
Ans: History noted.
Considering your age 35 years, trying to conceive since, one year and few test done, one of which suggest possibility of tubal blockage, there are various modalities of treatment.
Firstly, you can do laparoscopy to note the severity if blockage and do tubal cannulation.
Tubal cannulation is often the first line of treatment for patients with blocked fallopian tubes because it's a non-invasive procedure that's widely available.
Tubal cannulation is a procedure that can unblock fallopian tubes and is highly successful for proximal tubal blockages, with a success rate of over 80%. However, it may not be successful for all patients and is not recommended for distal tubal occlusions.
This procedure if successful can avoid IVF procedure. Laparoscopy has…
Yes, before ivf get all your blood test, ecg, 2 D echo, xray chest to rule out any illness
Same with your husband to get semen analysis and viral markers with blood sugars to be done.

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Dr Nandita

Dr Nandita Palshetkar  |36 Answers  |Ask -

Gynaecologist, IVF expert - Answered on Dec 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 17, 2024Hindi
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Hello Doctor, I’m in my late 20s, and lately, I’ve been feeling like something’s off with my body. My periods either show up way too early, sometimes not at all for months. And, I’ve been putting on weight even though I haven’t changed my diet or exercise routine. My skin has also turned into a battlefield with acne all over, which I never used to have before. My cousin, who’s around my age, just found out she has PCOS, and her mom (my aunt) went through something similar when she was younger. Now, I’m scared because I’ve been hearing all these horror stories about how it can affect fertility, and I’m not even married yet. What if it’s a family thing and I end up facing the same problems? My mom says, ‘Don’t worry, it’ll be fine,’ but I can’t stop thinking about it. Should I see a gynecologist, or is there another kind of doctor I should be visiting? What tests should I do to get to the bottom of this before it gets worse? Honestly, I’m feeling overwhelmed and just want to know what’s going on before it’s too late.
Ans: Hello, noted your concerns
You are in late 20’s with irregular periods, acne, weight gain,
You are undergoing hormonal imbalance
We need to do certain blood test like
CBC, tsh prolactin fasting insulin level
Hba1c, testosterone level
DHEA, LH FSH ESTRADIOL LEVEL
Amd AMH level to check for fertility level
Usg pelvis to rule out
Pcos
The mainstay treatment. For pcos is lifestyle changes
1) Daily exercise, walks. Zumba, running
2) Good nutritious food with proteins, vitamins, minerals, low carbs and fats
3) good adequate sleep 7 to 8 hours
4) stress management: yoga meditation, breathing exercise
5) supplements to controls effects of pcos
6) low dose OC PILLS TO regularize the cycles

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